Light. That's what TaiFeng was to Xichen. A radiant beam of pure light. She was like the luminous full moon that lights up a dark path on a pitch-black night. Without her, it felt like there was a total eclipse. Food had no taste, sunlight had no warmth. The birds didn't sing, and the flowers lost their scent.

It had almost been three months since TaiFeng had gone missing, and there was still no sign of her. The entire cultivation world searched high and low but to no avail. Any Wens that they all had encountered all said the same thing.

"We don't know anything."

In the Unclean Realm, word had reached Huaisang and Chifeng-Zun of TaiFeng sacrifice and surrender to the Wens. Without any hesitation, almost all of Qinghe Nie's forces were mobilized to turn the tides of the war. Meanwhile, Huaisang sent out every one of his snitches and spies in a desperate attempt to locate his dear friend.

If Huaisang knew one thing about TaiFeng, it was that she was the most prideful person he had ever met. There's no way that she would surrender to the Wens unless it was to protect those she loved.

Over in Lotus Pier, Wuxian and Jiang Cheng were fighting on the front lines almost every single day. But no matter how many Wens they took down, more and more just kept coming.

While Yanli helped out as best she could, attending to the injured, it didn't make much of a difference. As much as they hated to admit it, they were losing this war. Despite Gusu sending over reinforcements, Yunmeng looked like a bomb zone. All the non-cultivators and townspeople had long since upped and left, not wanting to get caught in the crossfire.

They missed their sister. They all hated this horrible feeling, not even knowing whether she was safe. Was she eating well? Was she under a roof? Was there enough timber in the hearth?

  Winter was fast approaching, was she wearing enough layers? Was she still in the Wens' clutches? Maybe she escaped, this was Yuzhao Long after all. She always had a trick up her sleeves.

They just didn't know, and it was eating them from the inside. 

Surprisingly, the situation over in YueYang was looking rather hopeful. Despite it being the closest Sect to the Wens, just being a hundred Li north of Qishan, they by far had the best defenses. 

When Guangyao headed over to help out due to TaiFeng's absence. They had already had things under control. The citizens had already been taken in as refugees inside the sect, and the Wen remnants were taking care of them all. They had amazing defenses and TaiFeng had written a few battle strategy diaries, just in case.

But it just wasn't the same.

This entire situation felt extremely odd to A'Yao.

It had been ages since TaiFeng went missing, and yet there wasn't any information on her whereabouts whatsoever.

No matter how many Wens they questioned, they couldn't get anything out of them. It was as if she was never with them in the first place, and if she was in the clutches of the Wen sect, it wasn't for very long. At least not long enough for any subordinates to find out about it.

Which begged the question; just where was she?

If she had escaped, there's no way on earth she would delay coming back to YueYang or Yunmeng. Hell, since she was, technically, (emphasis on technically) Yu Ziyuans adopted daughter, she could have even gone to the Meishan Yu Sect!

So where was she?

 Along with everyone else, the senior disciples were...... struggling. 

ChenHe had cried four times in eight hours, YiZhang was running on five hours of sleep, and the Gao brothers were having mood swings every five seconds. Where Gao Song left off, Gao Liang started up again.

 They were all going through extreme anxiety, and they were all missing TaiFeng to the point that they couldn't even sleep. Even though they had kept the damage in YueYang Town to a minimum, it just didn't feel good if Sect Leader Qian wasn't there. 

And then there was Xichen.

With TaiFeng gone, it felt like there was a massive hole in his chest. Everything faded into gray.

No matter how hard everyone tried, nobody could seem to console him. Every day he would put himself on the front lines, and question as many Wens as he could. Everywhere he went, he would ask about TaiFeng. Whenever he wasn't fighting, he would go to the courtyard where TaiFeng used to practice while she stayed at Gusu. He would sit there for hours, tracing his fingers over the sword marks that she left in the stone.  

She was in the flowers outside his mother's house, she was in the cool winter air that carried away the last signs of autumn. He saw her in the snowflake patterns that covered the highest peaks of Gusu. He felt her presence in the undying efforts of everyone in this war, and he heard her in the early morning birdsongs carried in by the cold winds from the eastern sea.

Sometimes he swore that she was right in front of him, smiling at him and telling him not to worry and that she was fine. Just like she always did. Sometimes he hated her selflessness, he wanted to tell her that it was okay to put herself first sometimes, that she didn't need to tear herself apart for the sake of others, and that she was just as important. 

He was scared. He was terrified that he might never get the chance to tell her that.

"Xiongxiang," Wangji said, snapping him out of another one of his dazed states.

Currently, they were in a temporary war base a few miles from a Wen supervisory office that was due to be sieged. They had got word that Wen Chao and a few other Wens were staying there.

"Wei Ying and Jiang WanYin are ready to set out." He said with a slight tinge of concern in his voice.

"You're worried?" Xichen questioned, turning round to face him.

"About you..." He said, once again refusing to elaborate on anything. Not like he needed to elaborate when it came to Xichen. He always understood what he meant.

He knew he needed to get his head in the game, he couldn't keep torturing himself like this. Not getting as much sleep as he needed, and refusing to take breaks when he needed to.

If he wasn't going to get it together for himself, he needed to do it for TaiFeng.

If he wanted to find her, he had to help himself first.

As the sky turned from pale blue to grey, they all set out under the fading late afternoon sky. The moon had already appeared through the blindingly white clouds, looking down on the scene that was soon to unfold.

The snow lightly fell like tiny diamonds from the clouds, gently dusting the forest floor but melting soon afterward

They all had extremely high hopes for this mission. If they took down this supervisory office and captured Wen Chao, it would be a step in the right direction in terms of turning the tide on the war that they were currently losing.

Getting closer and closer, they stalked their way through the trees.

Setting their sights on the building, they charged forward in an attack.

The Wens retreated into a clearing, where they were soon faced to face with Wen Chao and his men.

"Well, look who it is." He said, facing Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying.

  "The Yunmeng sibling quartet. Ah, wait, I guess it's just a trio now. Good riddance, if you ask me."

Shifting around on the spot, everybody now had a deep set of fear in their bones. What did he mean by that? The Yunmeng siblings? But that was Jiang Cheng, Jiang Yanli, Wei Wuxian, and...

Everyone froze as soon as they realized what he meant.

"Where is TaiFeng?!" Jiang Cheng roared out with fear laced in his voice as well.

"TaiFeng? Oh, right, her." Wen Chao snickered. "I took care of it myself. You should have seen the pathetic way she begged me to spare her. There's no way of surviving where she is. I wouldn't be suprised if her bones have already turned to dust."

"What the hell are you talking about?! ?!" Wei Ying spat, his sword unsheathed and ready to claim Wen Chao's life right there and then.

"Ah. I guess none of you would know, would you?" He laughed. " She's dead. Don't believe me? This should be enough proof." He said, reaching into his sleeve pockets and pulling out a blood-stained TongQing. 

Throwing it across the clearing, Jiang Cheng caught it in his hands. 

"This... T-this is, it can't be." He stuttered, tears staining his eyes. The bracelet shaking in his hands." There's no way!" 

Wuxian and Jiang Cheng were in utter shock and denial. TaiFeng, dead? It couldn't be! She was, She is! the strongest person they know! She was unkillable, she could not be killed! It was just impossible. 

Then why hadn't they heard from her in three months?

As the realization slowly sank in, all the memories flashed before their eyes all at once like an old film. 

When Wuxian first met her on that pathway.

When she hid behind Jiang Cheng like a scared little deer running behind a bush.

When she first showed them her swordsmanship.

Making friends at Gusu, and helping Shijie's relationship.

Becoming a sect leader, and ruling over YueYang with newfound pride and confidence. 

The party over in Lanling, where she saved Zixuan. 

Their little, no, their big sister had gone through so much in her life and grew up so fast, too fast. And just as fast as she matured, she had left them without any warning. 

It just wasn't fair! why do the kindest people have to always suffer the most?! It wasn't fair! she didn't deserve this, nobody deserved this, least of all A'Hong. 

She deserved the whole world, but the world didn't deserve her...

Why, why, why?!

The air was heavy and stifling, and Wen Chao had fled a while ago, but right now nobody seemed to care about him. 

There were tears of regret, fury, pain, heartache, and familial love. The Yunmeng disciples wept for their dearest Feng-Jie, and the Qinghe disciples bowed their heads low in admiration and respect for their fellow fallen warrior, who was also one of Young Master Huaisangs closest friends. She was probably the only one who could match his intelligence.

The Lanling disciples were shaking, wondering how on earth they would break the news to their First Young Master. He had never had friends when he was younger, not like her. she was probably the only one in the world who could make him open up and forget about all his worries. 

Jiang Cheng's body was racked with sobs, how was he going to tell Shijie? When TaiFeng was around he had never seen her so happy, he still vividly remembers them sitting in the courtyard. TaiFeng would play on her zither and Shijie and the other disciples would listen attentively.

She was just too kind and self-sacrificing. she was so smart and yet so dumb, couldn't she have found another way to save Lotus Pier?! 

She could see into the future for god's sake! Was this the only way?! 

Wuxian stood still, completely unmoving, as tears slowly fell from his bright, brown eyes. He thought that he was incapable of crying anymore, heck, the last time he cried was so long ago, he figured that his eyes just didn't work properly anymore.

And yet, just like everyone else, his tears fell. TaiFeng always seemed to bring out emotions in everyone that they didn't even know were there in the first place. 

Falling to his knees, silent tears of regret fell down Xichens face. As he tightly clenched his fists, all he could think was, 'Too late. I was too late.'

Why is it that he always lost the people closest to him? First, he lost his mother in such cruel circumstances, but then he was lucky enough to get his father back. And it was all because of TaiFeng.

But now she was gone, and he never even told her how she felt. She must have been feeling so lonely and helpless in her final moments. All this time he was searching for her, he was searching in vain. She was already long gone, and it was all his fault. He should have talked her out of going, he should have done whatever it took to stop her from going, and he should have been there. He should have saved her! 

Did TaiFeng even know just how much she meant to everyone? They showed it, but did anyone tell her? If they did, would she have changed her mind about going? If they had just told her that she didn't always have to sacrifice everything for everyone, things are different. If they had just taken the time and asked her if she was alright every once in a while...

maybe she would still be here.