*Soleil*
"There are two kind of hamram. The small ones, like the one you just saw, they look like a normal wolf. They are much stronger and faster though, and beside being bloodthirsty they are basically like a normal wolf. Which means no human intellect, they can't predict our moves, but only react in the moment". Marta explains after we come inside. "The one we saw when we looked for them was a High one. They are faster than the small ones and much stronger. They are smart, almost human like intelligence. Their big downfall is their aggressive nature, if we provoke them the loose and attack blindly and we Can use that".

"Our technique fighting the the small ones are a little different. They rather flee than fight. We have to lure them out and keep their focus, until we can kill them". Gudrun ads. "This method is not usable against the high ones. It is to dangerous getting that close to them".

"The staff there". I look at Gudruns staff with new admiration. "I guess you are super ninja ladies anyway".

"Nah far from". Gudrun laughs. "We had to train really hard with the staffs, just like real ninjaes. It is the tool of the vǫlur and was a common weapon back in Tordis time. We just continues the tradition. And airports are not really crazy about guns or swords on planes".

"We have different ways of fighting our enemies. You have seen galdr and a bit of herbal magic". Marta continued. "Using our seiðr we Can add ever power to our strikes with the staff. An ordinary staff would snap, it could never kill a 260 lbs hamram. Our vǫlvastaff can".

"But as long as you stay here in britain you can use like silver bullets and holy water and what else works right ?" I look around, trying to spot other weapons.

"Silver bullets would definitely kill them, but so would ordinary bullets". Gudrun said with a small giggle. "If you can get the beast to stand still long enough to hit it. You would probably run out of bullets before you can kill it and then it's too late to grab the staff".

"The hamram can bleed out if the wound is bad enough and Well Breaking their neck works as you just saw. But they heal up really fast, so you have to keep attacking till they are completely death". Marta said with a humorous glint in her eyes. "Holy water ? Isn't that another kind of monster ?"

"Uhh". I was surprised over her suddenly being so friendly. When I meet her eyes I feel guilty and look down. "I am truly sorry that I didn't do as I was told. I promise it won't happen again".

"Isn't that a bit much to promise my dear ?". Siri sits down next to me on the couch. "Never is an awful long time".

"It is but I got it now. Now in hindsight I can see it was stupid and dangerous. I actually don't know why I ran back here. I am usually not that irresponsible".

"I have noticed that Your temper get an edge when you have contact to Your kin. I Think it is because of the violent powers he poses. Those are chaos powers, wild and aggressive. They could wipe out all of us, if he wants to". Siri looks a bit worried. "Marta might be right, it could be to much of a responsibility for a human to poses such powers. You need to be careful not to let Your feelings get the better of you. You need to train Your impulse control".

Siri is right. I can see it myself, I am more on an edge, feel more agitated. I blush when I remember how I threatened Mark. "I might have changed. I was pretty mean to a friend the first time I had contact with Tjalfe. I have felt bad about it ever since".

"Oh another thing". Siri said very seriously. "Your kin's name is between you and him. If another vǫlva learns his name she can use him for dark seiðr against you".

"Oh I didn't know. But I thought the vǫlur was the good guys ?" I say confused.

"Some.. a few can't resist the powers and start using them for their own gain. When you get home you might get tempted to use seiðr to resolve everyday problems for instance. But that is not what it is for and you would upset the balance". Siri explains.

"If you get exposed to the public..". Gudrun starts saying, but she stops herself.

"What would happen then ?" I slowly sip my tea. I kind of have an idea what the answer will be.

"Then we would have to stop you. We can't risk the public finding out that those evil creatures actually exist". Marta said calmly.

I look at Siri, feeling slightly uneasy, she looks back with a reassuring smile. "The guy I was mean to... it was because he was there when..". I stop talking when my voice fail and I look down.

".. when you got the calling. I know that". Siri pats my hand lightly. "Don't worry dear. You haven't done anything wrong. You are not responsible for what happened at home in the forest. What Marta means if you decided to expose yourself on purpose and acted carelessly or misused Your calling, then we would be forced to act. But the first time there is nearly always witnesses. It will be Your job to clean up when you get back home". Siri sends me a smile and a wink. "You will need to find everyone who was present, so I can talk to them".

"Oh great". I breath out a sigh of relief. "So you will make their memories disappear, just like you did with my mom ?" I say.

"Yes. Maybe now you can see why it is better to let people believe that there is more to the World than they can see, instead of letting them know for a fact". Siri answers.

"I Think it is time". Gudrun say, looking at her watch. "There haven't shown up more than the one, so we got of easy after all".

"You are right. I am sure there won't be any people by the Big fishing lake at this time. Take Soleil with you". Siri looks at me. "This has to be a fitting punishment for disobeying an order".

Gudrun gets up and I reluctantly follow her outside. I am about to ask her where we are going when my eyes fall on a human body in the middle of the courtyard. Were the women had killed a wolf, there were instead a naked young man, staring into nothing.

I choke down a scream and turn to run back into the house.

"Hey". Gudrun grabs my arm. "Unfortunately this is also part of the calling. When the hamram dies, they return to their human form and we are left with the clean up".

Gudrun gets a tarpaulin and spread it out on the ground. She grabs his shoulder and hip, to roll him up on the plastic. I shudder. The way she wraps up the pale body shows me that this is far from the first time she has had to get rid of a body. When she stands up I stare with disgust at the result.

"I can't do this". I whisper. "This is so wrong. That is a human being".

"This human being would have killed us all had he gotten the chance. He would have woken up tomorrow with no idea of what he had done. He would have gone home and tonight he would have wolfed out again and killed more people". Gudrun explain very seriously.

"Maybe he wouldn't have, isn't that possible ?" I look pleading at Gudrun. "What about his family ? Don't they deserve to know what happened to him ?" I ask scared. I can hardly recognise the warm and sweet woman, like she stands there all calm and collected about this.

"That is why we go to the lake. The traumas his body has sustained Can be made to look like an accident". She explains. "The police will not be able to see that he were killed. They will rule it an accident. His family is better of thinking it was".

I look at the long bundle, hidden under the tarpaulin. I have to swallow several times to stop myself from throwing up, pressing my nails into my palms to move my focus. Gudrun probably think it is the fear of being caught that scares me, but it isn't. What makes me shake is to think about how long it will take before I become like Gudrun, and can handle a dead body like it is nothing. Will it be like this at every full moon ?

"Okay". I whisper horsley.

"Good then. Grab that end and help me get it in the trunk". Gudrun say, grabbing the plastic.

The weight surprises me, when I reluctantly pick up my end and I have to get a better grip. I gasp when a stench of acetone comes out from the plastic and I almost let go.

"What is that smell ?" I press out, waddling after Gudrun to the car.

"Death". She answers shortly. "Come on lift it".

It isn't easy getting bundle into the trunk, as it is all limp, and I whimper like a puppy every time I feel him slide around inside. Finally he slide inside and Gudrun closes after him, walking to the drivers side.

I drag myself to the passenger side. It takes all my willpower not to run of. Instead I slide in beside Gudrun. I curse myself for being such a covert and just do as I am told.

When we reach the lake Gudrun quickly look around for the best spot to dump him. I stay in the car, trying not to panic about the idea that a police car might come by any minute and open the trunk.

Gudrun comes back, getting the car to where there is a very steep fall directly into low water. "Let's get this over with". She say lowly and get out the car.

We manage to get the bundle out of the trunk and to the drop. Gudrun quickly unpack the body and lets it roll down the steep rocks. Like a rag doll it tumbles down and end in the low water, twisted and broken. The empty eyes looking up at me and I have to pull away not to throw up.

"Nothing more we can do here". Gudrun do a last quick scan, making sure no one have seen them. "Let's get out of here".

We drive for a while without speaking.

"He didn't look sixteen". I say, staring out the window.

"No he was older. Sometimes, like with this one, we don't manage to find them and if they get away from us on their first full moon it gets hard". Gudrun bites the inside of her cheek. "But we always get them in the end".

"In the end ?"

"Sooner or later they kill someone.. mostly sooner". Gudrun say with a sigh.

I swallow. "Oh".

Gudrun nods, but then she lights up. "Let's talk about something else, how was he ? Your kin, the Jötnar ?"

"No very chaos like. He refused to look like Utgard-Loki, and he kind of speak like a teenage boy version of my friend". I answer.

"Hmm". Gudrun looks kind of disappointed.

"Hmm what ?"

"Nothing.. I think I just imagined something else.. I don't know.. something bigger perhaps". She say.

I glance at her. "Like a burning bush or something".

"Something like that yeah. I grew up with asatru. My family has their own cult. The Jötnar is as big part of my believes as the æsir and vanir. It's a bit funny as I am kin with a vaette now and works with the spirits of nature, have done for many years. But still". She giggles and shakes her head. "A Jötnar walking among us, what is next ? Odin making an appearance ?"

I don't answer. I can't remove the picture of the young dead man from my head. And now when Gudrun is back to her chatty smiling selv, I find the pull to not just forget even stronger. It can never become something I just do. It has to matter, to mean something. I sigh and rest my forehead against the window watching the sunrise.

"If it's okay I want to catch some sleep". I say as soon as we enter the cabin. And without waiting for an answer I go directly to my room, knowing they all look worriedly after me.