"How have you been since our last session, Hemalyn?" My therapist asked me and I shrugged softly, "Normal."

"And normal for you is?"

"Uhh... I don't know." I didn't get what hhe meant.

I sat across from her, knowing that Mother and Mom were trying to eavesdrop to the best of their abilities in worry for me. They did this last time, but this was my third session- They couldn't stick around with me when it was I who had to learn about why I feel this way. They would get the details from my therapist afterwards, not in the moment where things could be easily misinterpreted.

"I heard you were recently on a date despite you not being so good at socializing." I nodded, feeling slightly awkward that my mothers told Dr. Croft that.

"Yeah.. It was a sudden thing but it was okay, better than what I expected it to be."

"That is good. Being with someone has shown in many to give people in bad mental states a boost of energy and life. Of course, it isn't the same for everyone." I nodded in understanding. Dr. Croft didn't want to give me information and then totally take it to heart in case things go wrong in that department. He only has my best interest in mind.

"Now... From what it says here, you have only dated one other person before, correct?" I nodded, seeing his eyes narrow down at the name.

"Maya Jones- An english name, don't see a lot of those in Japan."

"It is because she was originally from the UK. She was studying over here abroad."

"Your relationship with her lasted for 9 months before you broke it off. Had something happened that you didn't tell your parents?" I felt my stomach contract uneasily, my mind flashing at the moment I broke up with her. I glanced over at the door, not realizing that he saw my cautious gaze. "So something did indeed happen... If you do not want to discuss it with your parents so close, then you do not need to-" I cut him off with a small smile and the shake of my head.

"I didn't end it on bad terms with her... At the time that is what I thought anyway."

-

"Hema~" I looked over, seeing Maya impatiently waiting for me at the door with her lunch bag in hand and her school bag over her shoulder. I smiled softly, "I'm almost done, I just need to-"

"Come on! You have studied enough, you are going to wear yourself thin!" Maya told me with a huff, walking over and grabbing my bag before stuffing my books into it. I shrunk down, feeling eyes prying onto us. It was no secret that Maya and I were dating- But that didn't mean everyone was all for it. Even if we were attending Lobelia Academy- Where many girls here were all for that.

Unlike myself, Maya was more comfortable with her sexuality and confident in herself. She was indeed fond of makeup and received free samples from Mother on occasion to try out. A model student- Ironically she was going to become a model for clothing, that was at least what she wanted to do after high school. She was much better than me at everything except for being able to stay up for five days straight.

"Finals aren't for another month anyway! We can always crunch and you know that I will be there to help you." I nodded, getting up from my seat in the classroom. "Now come on! I made us both lunch today, hopefully I don't poison us." She giggled and we walked to the cafeteria, seeing the buzz of the all girl's school in an average day.

I had to frequently reminded myself that I was going here, that I was apart of this place's history. This was the longest I have ever been in a school, for almost a full two terms! And I started dating Maya before school started. I felt accomplished with that, no incidents, almost to no meltdowns or panic attacks. And if there were any- Maya was right there to help. I was thankful for that.

"I made teriyaki chicken- With rice of course- Bean dumplings for each of us and steamed vegetables. Simple, but with the right spices and technique my dad always tells me- It will be delicious." Maya informed me brightly. Maya was the daughter of a famous chef in England, who she didn't get to see as often as most of his restaurants were in England and only two were in Japan. Osaka and Tokyo. So, they spoke through Skype or phone to maintain their relationship.

"Soy sauce too?" I questioned and I saw her freeze, "Oh no!" And she forgot the soy sauce. I chuckled as she opened her lunch bag and pulled out the containers, handing them to me so she could see if she brought any. But the look on her face told all- She forgot.

"Aww... Do you by chance of extra money on you so we can get some?" She asked me and I pursed my lips.

"I don't know..." She rolled her eyes and put the containers back into her bag.

"If anything, we will just steal some off of the Drama kids." She told me, continuing to walk.

Maya was a model student, better at everything than me- But she had her own faults. Such as her forgetfulness and short fuse. She could be angered easily and become violent verbally. She has gotten better at controlling herself since meeting me. But her violent tendencies were still there.

After a short amount of walking, we made our way into the cafeteria and took our usual spots near the Drama kids, seeing them laugh and banter about everything and anything. We sat here due to Maya's wishes since she wanted to maintain good standings with everyone she goes to school with- In case something happens in the future.

I found that a bit undeniving of her, and didn't start to question it until a week later of the current flashback.

I took a bit of rice and put it into my mouth, listening to Maya speak to one of the Drama kids.

"Are you coming to our latest show this weekend?" She asked, eyes full of hope. Maya spoke, a big smile on her face.

"Of course! Although, Hemalyn won't be able to."

"Aww- Why not?"

"She is going to visit her grandfather. He has fallen ill again unfortunately." Another flaw, she told personal information without asking first.

"I'm so sorry! I send him my best wishes!" She told me and I nodded, smiling through what I was feeling. Maya saw the sadness in my eyes but chose to ignore, most likely thinking it was just another one of those days.

She spoke to them and rarely spoke to me for the rest of lunch as I ate, knowing she would get mad at me if I didn't eat three meals a day. After I was finished and saw she barely touched her own food, the bell rang, signalling for all of us to get to class before the third bell.

"Maya, lunch is over." I told her, breaking her out of her conversation. She looked down to her meal, eating one more piece of chicken before putting the lid back over it. "I will finish it between classes." She told me, her eyes going down to in front of me on the table, satisfied to see that I most ate everything, only a thin layer of rice was left. We cleaned up our area before heading back to class, seeing that we were going to be together for this one. It was the only class we had together, while I was with the ones who could barely understand the concept of math- She was in the leagues of higher ups.

It was PE, Physical Education. Which was why it was the only class we had together.

We headed to the locker rooms to get dressed into our gym uniforms when a thought crossed and crashed my mind upon seeing all of the girl's changing.

I didn't feel.. Anything.

I looked to Maya, seeing that she was doing her best to ignore the girls sauntering around us half-naked. While Maya was struggling like usual (Because she wanted to remain loyal and not look at other girls in that sort of light) I could look and not feel anything, no lust or drooling at the mouth.

"Maya, do you have extra perfume?" A girl asked, changing into a sports bra. Maya nodded, still not looking over at her as she grabbed one out of her locker.

"Yeah, here you go!" She chirped cheerfully, looking over at me as she handed it over. I finished putting my sweatpants on, feeling conflicted on why I couldn't feel anything. I thought I was into girls? I was with Maya, I was dating a girl but- Even when I looked at her, I didn't feel anything. Was I a bad person?

Feeling down and confused, we went into the yard to play a friendly game of tag. As in- Maya would run around the track and everytime she would pass me, she would tag me until I would catch up to her and tag her back,

It has only happened once, of me tagging her. Which was not a great achievement since we have been hanging PE for 8 weeks now. (A/N: I'm going by U.S standards of public schools having 9 weeks of PE and so and so. I am Homeschooled so I have no clue, only going by what I heard heard from my friend who go to public school. Plus, I don't go to school in Japan so I don't know how things work over there. Just wanted to clarify things incase people who do know more about the Japanese School System than I do get confused in the comments)

"You ready to smell my rubber?"

"You mean your leather?" I questioned her with a brow raised. She stuck her tongue out at me before we began to run, seeing her get further and further away with each yard line I passed.

This was different, something I have never noticed before. I mean, I do like her but, do I really? Am I mixing things up?

I don't know, I couldn't really. This was the first time and if anything- Made me question more about myself and how I felt. Maya was a no brainer. She was really into girls and would go on and on about a singer's features to me, saying that she was on my level of beauty and what not to make me feel better when I was feeling insecure.

I couldn't tell, and was afraid of why. Should I ask Maya? Or would she take that in the wrong way? I don't know. I groaned, quickening my pace.

To Be continued