I sighed, my hand clenching the delicate pendant around my neck.

I never knew that I would have to face such a time like this. And now that it's here, I'm scared.

I'm scared because I don't want to leave.

But....why should I stay at a place where I'm not needed. Where I'm not wanted. Where I'm not welcomed.

"Ayesha?"

I stiffened when I heard him.

He was behind me.

I didn't want to turn to face him. I don't think that I'm strong enough to face him. But I knew that I must. I had to.

I was leaving and I needed to tell him that.

Sighing, I turned around. He was standing by the door, looking at me with a look of pity. His white kurta had become dirty from the mud and soil that it must've come in contact with during the burial.

"I'm leaving." I said, my voice low but firm. He frowned.

"What do you mean?" He asked, looking confused.

I bit my lower lip, not sure how I should answer him.

Be strong Ayesha. I told myself.

"Zeeshaan has invited me to stay with him in Pindi. He thinks that we should spend some time together now that we're by ourself." I told. Ibteshaam's brow creased. And I think I saw a look of gentleness cross his brown orbs. But as he got close to me, all I could see in his eyes was pity and sympathy and I hated it.

"Okay. And when will you be back?" He inquired. That actually caught me by surprise. I didn't think that he would ask. He never bothered to ask me about anything before.

"I don't know." I muttered.

"What do you mean you don't know?" He asked, his tone sounding stern. "Don't you think that you should ask me-"

"I would've asked you. But this is something that I need for myself. And I think, like always, taking your permission wouldn't have mattered." I said, cutting him through.

"Ayesha-" he tried to touch my shoulders but I backed away. I didn't need him touching me right now. If he did, I would grow weak and I needed to be strong at the moment.

"Please, don't." I mumbled in a weak voice.

"If you're going because of me then-"

"Yes," I nodded. "I am leaving because of you. I think we need some space between us." I told truthfully. However, I was shocked when I saw the look of bewilderment enter his eyes. Of course, he could've never imagined that I would one day leave him, but now, I needed to give him a reality check.

"You're leaving me?" He asked, his expression one of disbelief.

I suddenly felt so weak. All I wanted was for him to hold me, to take me into confidence. To tell me that everything was going to be alright.

To tell me, that he'll always be by my side. Just like he told me in the past.

But I was being foolish.

The Ibteshaam then, and the Ibteshaam now were two different people.

If there was anything I had learnt from our one year of marriage, it was that he didn't care about me. No matter how much I loved him and how much I cared about him, he could never bring himself to feel even an iota of how I felt for him.

"Yes, I am."

**********

Well, what do you think? I've been thinking to write this story for a really long time. And now, I've decided to finally pen it down.

How ever, I should inform you guys that this is an exclusive Booknet story and I will only publish half of it on wattpad and inkitt. You will have to eventually purchase half of it on booknet :)

Anyway, I hope that you'll enjoy this story ;)
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