A/N: JUST TO CLEAR UP, HER DAD IS PLAYED BY JAMIE LOMAS AND HER MUM BY JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT, IN FLASHBACKS.

Lara's POV:

I had been discharged two days ago so I could go to L.A, it was a week and a half after the accident, I was to go back to the hospital for a full checkup when we got back. To see how my incision site was doing and reconsider my medications etcetera. Jack and I had been packing our stuff for the plane. I wasn't excited as such because of the reason, but I hadn't seen my dad in ages, I hated the reason why though.

Whilst I was in the hospital, they were doing rehab therapy with my legs, moving them forwards and backwards up and down, I was using the bars to take a few steps each day on my own. It was hard and tiresome, most days I gave up, screaming and crying, I fell on the floor alot, bruising my legs and my ego, Vic, Jack, Travis and Maya tried to encourage me to do it, but I couldn't stop crying.

I was looking at pictures of my dad and my mum, that had been found in boxes in my basement, I sat in silence crying, Jack came in, saw what I was doing and scooped me in his arms, kissing my head. "I hate it." I whimpered, the tears rolling down my cheeks as I held the pictures in my shaking hands, Jack just sat with me until I calmed down.

Then I found a picture of my mum when she was younger, around 9ish, I started crying harder, missing her so much. "I miss her." Sobbing into Jack's shoulder as he rubbed my back smoothly, kissing up and down my neck. "I know you do, I'm so sorry babe." He sighed, trying to calm me down slightly. I laid in his arms on the floor for a bit, comforted.

"We leave in 2 hours to get to the airport, Vic offered to drive us. Are you sure you have everything? Epilepsy meds, Heart meds, Painkillers, Anxiety meds." Jack asked, listing off things I needed but had already got. "I have them all in my med case in my toiletries bag in my suitcase. Jack don't worry. I'm going to go get changed" I whispered quietly.

My mother had been a model when she was younger before she got tied into the work of motherhood and became a teacher. My father was in the military, a major. I was always scared he would die on duty. He was barely every home. I never saw him, but I knew he was there and that he loved me.

My mother had died when I was 15 years old, it was 10 years anniversary of her death this year. The last time I had seen my dad was a year and a half ago when he got arrested, then I left after the whole aftermath, lived with my sister Asher for 2 months, then moved into a flat in chicago and then came to Seattle, all to escape my husband.

Shay had rang me on a group call with Asher, whilst I was in the middle of getting changed, I let it ring out and then I was left with my phone blowing up with messages from both of them. Pulling my top on, I called them back, as soon as they answered I was bombarded with a million questions. "Shay, the whole reason you got the flight before us was so I could process on my own." I laughed causing them to smile.

"Have you come to terms yet?" Ash had asked me sadly, causing the tears to come back to surface. "That's a stupid question, we'd known for ages and still haven't." Shay sighed, mentally facepalming, the stupidness of the situation making me sadly smile before the tears started up again, continuing to poor.

I was angry and upset with them and the whole situation, they kept it from me again. "Atleast I was told this time. Otherwise you probably would've told me a year later that dad died. At least this time I get to say goodbye! I get to see him one last time! Do you know what it was like for me!? I never said goodbye to my mother, the one who protected me and taught me how to do makeup and took me shopping for my first date. And I couldn't see her! You ALL kept it from me!" I broke down bitterly yelling at them the tears drenching my cheeks.

"Seriously Asher! You made her cry!" Shay yelled angrily and stressed, melancholy and aching inside, they were losing their father, they had lost their mother and now they would be the only things eachother would have. "It's fine, I haven't stopped, it's not just about... dad... it's the pain from the injuries from my accident and my anxiety. Look, we're leaving soon, Shay I'll see you in a bit, I love you guys. Bye." I whispered before ending the call.

Jack entered the room and stood in the doorway, watching me, the girl he loved slowly break apart inside. "Hi Jack. I'm fine." I sighed emotionally, making Jack jump, he hadn't known I knew he was there. "How-" He began confused, but I shook my head and went to him and he held me. "Please just hold me." I asked desperately, I just wanted to feel something that wasn't anger, hurt or sadness, I wanted to feel love.

"Vic's almost here, you ready?" He asked me, too emotional to speak I nodded my head, wiped my tears and tried to grab my bags. I hissed in pain as I bent over, like a red hot iron was pressing against my ribs on the right side. "Lara, let me take them. You were told to take it easy, that means not carrying anything. Go to the car and get in, I've got the stuff." Jack instructed me, I sighed frustratedly and did as I was told. It was so frustrating being told what I can and can't do, not allowed to work out which is all I want to do so I can work through my problems. Jack's treating me like a baby, not letting me do anything, I know he wants to protect me but it is so annoying.

Heading to the car the tears began to fall again, they never stopped, from pain, exhaustion, sadness. "Hey Lara." Vic smiled from the Car window as I slowly limped over, leaning on my crutches heavily, my chest heaving in pain. "Hey Vic." I coughed, taking slow deep breaths, she got out of her car to help me in, even though I was okay, it would just take a while.

"How's your knee?" She asked me, I just shook my head, completely exhausted, from my breakdown, dragging my sorry excuse for a body around on 2 metal sticks. "Terrible, it fucking hurts. Same as my ribs, shoulders okay, they took my sling yesterday as I'm fine without, stomach hurts when I bend over. Can't stop crying." I ranted, Vic pulled me into her arms for a hug, it comforted me knowing I was safe in her strong arms, I felt protected. Somewhat safe.

Jack piled our bags and cases into the boot and then sat in the back as I slowly lowered myself into the front seat, the crutches in the boot. "Ready?" Vic asked trying to lighten the mood slightly, I was stressed, upset, scared and emotional, nowhere near ready to go back to LA, between Texas and Chicago, when I was still trapped with Cameron, we moved to LA for 6 months, that was when my dad got arrested, I didn't know if he still lived there or where he was. I didn't want to see him, ever again.

The whole way there my good knee bounced up and down non stop, due to my anxiety, my hands shook and the tears had finally stopped. I felt Jack rest his hand on my shoulder and gently massage it, he was letting me know he was right there for me. Eventually we got to the airport after quickly stopping to the station to say goodbye to everyone. I definitely did not cry in Travis's arms, everyone hugged me except for the two people I work with who I hate, Andy and Emmet.

Dean had taken me off to the side and just let me cry in his arms, we had become close in my first few shifts, he was like my big brother and best friend all in one. "I'm just a call away if you ever need to talk, if you feel you can't talk to Jack or your siblings or Vic and Trav, call me, I'll listen if that's what you need." He had whispered soothingly in my ear, as I was leaving with Jack. It was an emotional goodbye to my friends, that had quickly become my second family.

At the airport both of us females were crying into eachothers shoulders, Jack stood with the bags awkwardly. I was in pain and upset overall but I was terrified of flying, when I was 10 my best friend had a birthday party at disneyland paris in France and we flew, the plane crashed and I was the only survivor from the party. My best friend Cassie, her brother and at the time my boyfriend Nathan, Her sister and my friend Hallie, her parents and her cousin Elliasa all died. I felt guilty that they all died and I survived.

We heard over the tannoys that if there were any boarders for flight 5048 to LA that we had to get through now as the flight left in just over an hour. Vic let go and smiled sadly, she quickly hugged Jack and then we left, me slowly hopping and Jack pulling our cases and my bag. We made it by the skin of our teeth, thankfully, otherwise we would have had to wait 7 hours for the next flight. As we boarded the plane I felt my anxiety building, I sat down and rested my head against the window as I waited for Jack to sit down after putting the crutches and carry-ons in the luggage cabin above our heads.

As he sat down, I felt myself getting tired and closed my eyes, I felt him pull my head across onto his shoulder and kiss my forehead. I heard the reminder to do our seatbelts and was about to open my eyes when I felt Jack doing it for me. The engines started up and we started moving, I just focused on my breathing like I had been taught to do for my anxiety, I sneakily opened my eye and looked out the window. Despite how scary it was, the sky was beautiful, a pinky orange with clouds parting ways and the moon slowly defining itself in the midst, stars slowly waking up.

An hour later I had fallen asleep and dreamed of 10 years ago, whenever I thought about my dad or family and got stressed and upset I had this dream. Well, more like a memory. Being told my mum had 'Fallen Asleep', after a week and a half of being told I couldn't see her but she was okay and alive, everyone but me knew. I was the youngest always the last to find out. I didn't get to say goodbye, or even see her body and hug her one last time like everyone else did. They thought I couldn't handle it. When I had found out I ran to my boyfriend Cameron's house, he held me and then after we got drunk and he did drugs. That was the first time he'd hit me, he had gotten wasted and stoned and beat me, for some sick joke he stabbed his used needles in my arm, at 15 I thought this was normal, I let him beat me for 8 and a half years, because he terrified me.

When I woke up, I could still feel the prick in my arm and his hot breath on my neck, it took a few minutes to breathe properly again, my eyes still closed as a few tears trickled down my cheeks. In that moment almost 10 years ago, I remember feeling the shame as he laid ontop of me and raped me, that was the first time he had done it. Since then he never stopped and I never had enough courage to report him, he never stopped and laughed and called me a slut.

I could never report him, he'd make it that he's the victim and I'm the bully, like he always twists it to protect his self and hurts others. To make me the one who gets into trouble and he's the innocent victim who was taken advantage of, when that really was me the whole time in our relationship.

As I started to drift off again the plane started to shake, just turbulents I told myself as a cry reached my throat but never made it out. Jack squeezed my hand and kissed my forehead again, obviously sensing my anxiety.

3 hours later our plane landed and we got through customs and drove to our hotel. We settled ourselves in and just laid in bed, me in jacks arms and jack kissing me. "You're okay, I'm here." He whispered in my ear, planting another kiss on my lips, I closed my eyes to get a few hours sleep before we went to see my dad in hospital, I don't know how I'm going to cope. When I found out my mother died, I broke down and attempted suicide once and self harmed for a while. I did drugs and got drunk with Cameron alot until Shay and Asher found out and forced me to go to rehab to get clean, after I attempted I was put in psychiatric hold for 2 months.

I had isolated myself from my whole family after I got out of hold and then rehab. Now I was 4 Years sober from drugs and I drink controlled amounts occasionally. The last time I used it was after Luke died, Ash and Shay had come to mine and found me high, my hands shaking as I tried to tighten a belt around my neck. They'd stayed with me for weeks after. Nobody except my family knew about this side of me, I didn't want to tell them so they constantly checked up on me. I might tell Jack soon but I'm not ready right now and I need to deal with this right now, all my energy is focused on getting through this week. If I ever feel tempted to get drugs or go over the top drinking or hurt myself I have to call Ash or Shay.

Niko and Chase know about the attempt and addictions obviously, but not all the details about my issues. 2 hours later my alarm went off, feeling Jack stroking my shoulder softly and pushing kisses across my neck and collarbone. "Hey sleepyhead." He smiled and I nodded, getting out of bed and into the shower, I took half an hour in the shower just standing in the hot water calming my nerves. I did my makeup and tied my hair into a messy bun. Pulling on tight leggings and a long white strappy top and blue hoodie and grey trainers. Heading out, I sat on the bed on my phone messaging Shay and Asher on our group chat. 'I'm sorry for exploding.' They replied saying it was okay and they understood.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I longed to get some oxy, I needed the sensation of being high to feel something. My hands itched for some, I clicked onto Ashers private profile and typed out a message, hesitating to send it multiple times. Checking Jack was still showering, I began to quickly type. 'Ash I need help. I'm craving oxy, I really need some. My hands are shaking and my chests hurting. My thoughts are all messed up and scattered, I can't focus. I'm scared I'm going to relapse, I have 4 Years I don't want to lose it.' Instantly she read it and sent a message.

'Lara, you can do this, you're my baby sister RaRa who's a strong fighter. You can get through this. Have you told Jack? About your addiction to Oxy and Heroin? He needs to know so he can support you, and help you. Stay with him, ignore it, drink freezing cold water and distance yourself from anything you could take or hurt yourself with. Remember we all love you.' Jack came out so I switched my phone off, we left and made it to the hospital, nothing could brace me for what I saw.

My father laid back in a hospital bed with multiple needles in his arm, bald and skinny, his eyes were shut. My heart stopped in that moment, I thought he was already gone, that it was too late. Then I focused on the beeping of the heart rate monitor and the raspy breathes being gasped and the rise and fall of his chest, grounding myself. I sat myself down slowly in the chair nearest his head by his side, putting my crutches by the wall Jack sat next to me and messaged Vic to say we'd arrived at the hospital.

Slowly and hesitantly, I took my fathers hand and squeezed it tightly, I had my head bowed and both hands held is, gently resting my head on them. "L-Lara?" A gasp escaped my slightly parted lips as I opened my eyes and looked at my father, a small smile appearing on my lips for a few seconds before instantly hiding again. 

"Hey dad, yeah it's me." Blinking back tears I sighed, the words that came from my mouth trying to sound happy but really just felt strained and forced. My heart swirled with emotion, my throat clogged up, it felt like it was impossible to breathe, seeing him like that. "This is my boyfriend, Jack. He came with me to help and he wanted to meet you." Wincing slightly, I explained introducing the 2 out of 3 most important men in her life to eachother.

"Helping, with what?" He gasped out, his eyes now open and focused on me and Jack, his eyes then drifting to my right knee, the brace sticking out in a bulk underneath my leggings. If only he knew.

"I was in a car accident at work. He made it possible for me to come today. Dad, I love you, I wish you told me." Taking deep breaths, I managed to ground myself a little, telling him the words I needed to say one last time, I love you, not knowing when he could go. "Shay's coming to see you soon."

A distant look in his eyes, he nodded vaguely. I can't believe I'm going to lose him soon. Breaking me out of my depressing thoughts, there was a knock on the door, Shay, tears threatened to spill again as I slowly stood up and leant on her, hugging her. "Shay.." I sighed, even though I had seen her a few days prior, I felt safe around her, I could talk to her.

Longing, that's all I had in my mind, I needed some oxy right now. I craved it, my hands shook, my thoughts were scrambled together and didn't make any sense.