13 Dec 2016
1

1:12 pm

Dear .......;

"I am extremely sorry; but this has to be said. Young love doesn't last longer. It is simply your hormones; that make you feel such attractions."

And I fell into deep thoughts. If that's the case; then I will start getting attracted to someone else. And then, will I forget you?

And sure enough; I found many people attractive. Yeah, you were not the only one that attracted me. But you were the only one that stayed in my mind all the time. You were like the background music in my mind. You were like the theme of my love.

I used to try to divert my mind from you and think about some other person. But unfortunately; I ended up thinking why you were not accessible to me. I used to wonder what it would be like to have you staring at me like someone stares at their lover.

"Ugh! You are desperate for a lover or so called relationship." My rational mind stated with disgust.

"Can't help it ..." My body shrugged under the influence of fluctuating hormones.

And thus; I was left like a Boulder ... That crushed many; but couldn't be crushed by any.

{OK ... I know it sounds disgusting but it still remains a mystery to me; why people call it 'a crush on someone'. And what qualities are needed to have or be 'a crush'.} **My intention was never to offend anyone. So please don't feel offended.**

So ... Let me confirm this to you ... You were not my first crush (i.e. if I ever had a crush!). Actually, you were never my crush. But you were the one that swept away all the crushes and stood out shining, like a shield.

I know I am blabbering rubbish.

And this has been happening to me ever since my teenage. See what you have done to me. And there are many more things that you did. I will tell those sometime later.

Yours lovingly,
Rukrish.