~16~ Who You Are is Not Who You’ve Been

(Brian’s POV)

Going out with my brother and his pack of friends isn’t the best choice I’ve made. But what else is there to do? But then again, I didn’t really know where the h3ll he was right now; which is a problem when it’s late out.

“Might not wanna do that, eh,” I heard his voice start to say. I looked around the corner of a corner store and saw Luke and Zac, of all people.

“Do what?” Zac spat.

“Go in there for liquor,” Luke answered with a smirk getting hit by the most mysterious street lights. Zac shifted positions.

“And why not?” Zac asked with a sigh as if preparing himself for nonsense. Luke started to pace around.

“I started to question why you’ve acted different—”

“Yeah, bro, I’m so sorry. It’s this whole new school thing and—”

“That’s not what I mean,” Luke interrupted.

“Oh,” I saw Zac mouth.

“You and Devin, huh,” Luke smirked once more and stopped pacing.

“What would I have with that nerd?” Zac snorted. My question exactly.

“Free grades? His sister—” Angel. “—or maybe his drug.”

Zac stood up straighter.

“I don’t know how you found out about that, but—”

“I have my ways.”

“What do you want with it?” Zac asked him, flat out.

“What do I want with drugs? Please,” Luke commented with arrogance. Luke is more suicidal than Zac. If there’s a drug, he’ll try it. “So…what is it?”

“I’d like to tell you—”

“But it’s a secret chemical, right?” Luke interrupted, again.

“Exactly.”

“So steal it,” Luke commanded with a shrug.

“It’s not that simple and it won’t do anything for you,” Zac said, but something made me believe that it was a lie of his.

“Oh really. And why not?”

“Because it cures diabetes. It has absolutely no effect on healthy people,” Zac told. I remembered in seventh grade during a physical when the doctor pulled him aside and I eavesdropped to found out that he had diabetes. No one else seemed to notice it though. Occasionally I’d catch him check his blood in the bathroom or at my house, but recently, I hadn’t seen that—considering the school situation and the fact that he’s been hanging out with Devin...and Angel…recently.

“You sure that’s all it does?” Luke muttered. Zac nodded. Luke stood up straighter and started to look around. “I’ll see you around. I’m trying to lose my brother…”

Luke left in a jog down the street and I presented myself to Zac as if I hadn’t been there.

“Have you seen my brother?” I asked.

“A bunch of times,” Zac answered, towering over me with a smirk that matched his sarcasm.

“Tonight,” I hissed.

“Maybe, maybe not,” he shrugged, looking away from me. “Why are you looking for him?”

“He’s my brother…” I reminded. Zac shifted positions and still held a smirk.

“Let me guess, now that you don’t have Angel, you’ve only got Luke,” he guessed.

“And now that you don’t have Lulu, you have Angel,” I countered.

“Touché,” he commented before walking around me.

“I know you were lying,” I said over my shoulder. I heard his Converse come to a halt.

“What?” he asked. I turned to him.

“You were lying to Luke,” I accused. He gave me a new look. He was quiet for once, too. “We both know that Devin’s…chemical had a different effect.”

He shifted positions once more and leaned down to my height. He looked at both of my eyes and gave me enough room to watch his originally strict-brown eyes to change into different colors right before mine.

“Did you take it?” he whispered.

“No,” I breathed. His eyes immediately changed back to a chocolate brown. Maybe even darker.

“Then I suggest that you take your assumptions elsewhere,” he hissed before standing up straighter. He was different because of this “drug” and I could tell.

“What’s it do?” I asked.

“Why do you care?” he snickered.

“I wanna know why one day out of the blue, you decide to save my girlfriend from a fire and act differently since then,” I said, truthfully.

“Ex-girlfriend,” he corrected. “And why wouldn’t I save her? Just because she hates me, doesn’t mean I returned the feeling.”

“Lies,” I mumbled.

“It’s the truth,” he said with changing eyes. I could tell that the drug did that as well.

“Nothing else is,” I commented.

“Well you can take that up with Devin, then, now can’t you?” he responded before walking off.

***

“I can’t do that,” Devin told me.

“Why not?” I asked, frustrated.

“I can’t be making a comic book come to life!” he yelled. “This isn’t X-Men, you know!”

“You sure?” I reasoned. He gave me a look.

“I can’t help you,” he said.

“But at least tell me why, or at least what it is,” I insisted. He rolled his eyes and sighed.

“It’s a powerful drug, Brian,” he said.  I knew it. “I don’t even know you well enough to run before and after tests, nonetheless.”

“Then ask me questions now and then!” I resolved. He started to shake his head. “Come on. You experimented with Zac of all people. Try with someone healthy like me.”

“I have…” he muttered. So there’s more than just Zac…

“Then try again,” I pleaded in a whisper.

“There’s no more possible triggers…” he muttered to himself. Triggers? He looked up from the ground. “Why are you even asking? Is it to get back with my sister? Because I assure you, everything between her is messed up—”

“Did you give it to her?!”

“No, no, but whomever I did, well, she crossed paths with them,” he worded oddly. “Adding you in the equation won’t be pretty.”

“But it’ll at least give me a shot, right?” I said. Anything to get me back with Angel…

Devin looked down to contemplate something and then looked up with a devious grin.

“If I agree to give you the drug, you have to do and feel what I tell you to,” he said.

“Within reason,” I replied.

“No promises,” he responded. What did this mean? That I’d get the drug.

“I’m in,” I said. Why did I feel like this would be the stupidest thing I’ve done in my life? Oh right. Cuz it probably was.

***

I did what Devin told me to.

A week later, I took the scentless and tasteful chemicals and felt no different at first. At that, I started to think that doing this for Angel wasn’t so bad considering nothing happened. Then, I did the second thing Devin told me to do, which was go right outside and touch the growing tree in my front yard; right at its thick roots that were above the dirt. Why? I didn’t question it. I just carried out the third task, which was falling asleep.