The sounds of construction were roaring in the distance. I pressed my pillow to my ears, hoping it would drown out the commotion. After a few minutes, the sounds would die, but come back with twice the force. It looked like they weren’t going to stop anytime soon and I hated it when the construction guys didn’t care.

Cursing, I sat up.

It was time for my daily shower. I went for my bell, but my hand met the drawer. I glanced everywhere, but the contraption disappeared. Speaking of missing, the whole room was off. My medication wasn’t on my stand and the nurse who bathed me was gone.

Was it that time already? I had already contemplated my death for a while, but I didn’t think I would be going down like this. I had done some nasty things in my lifetime. Things I wouldn’t want another soul to do. I was lucky enough to end up at a psych ward where people wouldn’t question anything and label everything a disease or two.

I might as well let the head nurse know. She was a busty woman with a chopped heart. She didn’t care about any of us, but I wouldn’t tell her that. One time I saw her doing inappropriate things with the doctor.

Lady had daddy issues.  

“Mina! Mi--” I grabbed my throat. My voice hadn’t sounded like that in years. I got up with such a speed, I tripped my way to the mirror. I grabbed the edges of the wall, hoping it would keep me steady.  Though, I didn’t need any support. I was strong, again. My limbs didn’t ache and the pain of impact when my hip met the tile floor disappeared.

The man looking back at me had smooth skin and lush hair. He had an expression like he had just seen a ghost. Pale and lost, my hand came up to my face, massaging the flesh. My skin felt like a baby’s bottom. When I was younger, I had the blessing of not getting as much acne as a young adult male usually does.

I pinched my cheek. Hard. Blood flowed and I hissed at the pain.

Still, no waking up from wherever I was. I looked everywhere. The hospital room didn’t look like a hospital anymore. I ended up in  my room when I was in my twenties. All my knick knacks and old albums were sprawled everywhere. It was nostalgic and I knew what the one thing I wanted to take advantage of from all this.

Dinner time.

I grinned, getting ready and make the most of it. At 75, I still knew my way around my old room. I was still a kid at heart and I wouldn’t question anything.

This was my paradise after death and that’s it.

********

I recall meeting a girl I would have married so long ago. I couldn’t think of a name. She was the one and I knew that the moment she came over for dinner. She was my neighbor. It was the only thing I can remember her by.

Her skin was the color of oak. She had locks that passed certain areas men would love to cradle. And, her smile, it reminded me of rays from the sun. It made you feel warm inside. I could never forget that feeling, but I don’t get how I could forget her name. I bet it was lovely and fit everything about her.

With all my thoughts, I dropped my fork on the floor. The thrum reaching my eardrums. I cringed at the contact.

“Christian. Are you paying attention?” I could have sworn this was voice was an annoying cricket, chirping away.

And, there it was. That one voice that got me riled up with fear and a violence no man should be feeling towards their old man. I mean, we were family, but he had a different way of showing the love.

“Y-yes, sir,” I grimaced, this feeling foreign. I looked down to my dinner plate.

Brandon got up from his chair and tore me a new one. It never got passed verbal abuse, but I feared the day he used all that aggression and beat me. I didn’t do well with physical contact after coming back from war.

“You killed her, fool. She’s never coming back and it’s all because if you,” he spat, the tears just forming. He was drunk and lost in his emotion. Stupid man.

I know. I know. I know.

He didn’t have to tell me twice. I knew all that, but that didn’t stop me from giving me ‘that look.’ The look that reminded him of her. I would use it over and over, again, until he couldn’t handle it anymore. Until he snapped.

“Cat got your tongue, boy? You’re lucky to even be alive, you know that? I could’ve had you locked up with the crazies a long time ago, but I’m a good person.” Or so he thinks. I knew what he does after I sleep. He left to find his way of coping.

I snorted, a move I would sorely regret. I forgot how this went down. It was so long ago, but I wanted to do things differently.

He started swinging. I accepted every impact. I deserved that much, but then again. Wasn’t this all a dream? With bruised up eyelids, I searched for a weapon. I felt the utensils. I could scoop his eyes out, but that meant I had to get closer to him and no in hell was that happening.

I just went on pure instinct. I grabbed something and jammed it through his windpipe. Oh, the sounds he made were priceless. He squirmed like a fish without water and I enjoyed every second of it.

“Who’s the fool now, boy?” I grabbed the spoon and got to work on his eyes. Half an hour later, Brandon didn’t look like my father anymore. He was minced meat. I could have him for dinner, but I wasn’t into cannibalism. I’d give his body to the homeless, all butchered up and ready to eat.

Served him right. The bastard was more like my tormentor than a father. Growing up was the hardest thing. I grew up with the feeling of fear, afraid of defying his every wish. At times, I would sympathize him, other times, I would scorn him for all the things he had said to me.

I stilled, hearing footsteps approaching us. They were light as a feather, but somehow I could pick them up.

There on the foyer was the angel I had been searching all my life. She was just as beautiful, too.

Daniela.

*******

Moans of pain and pleasure filtered throughout the room. I knew I had made the right choice by taking this sickly old man. He was near death, so why not spice it up a notch? His grey brows creased with worry, as if he had stepped into a bad memory.

“How’s the subject holding up, Mina?”

“Stable, but his emotions are all over the place, sir.” I grabbed a wet towel and dabbed Christian forehead.

“Any sign of malfunctions?”

A pause, “No.” Not yet, anyway.

“Good, make sure to update me if anything comes up,” he turned to leave. I admired the view.

“It would be my pleasure,” a smirk made its way onto my face.

*******

Turned out, Daniela was the name of the girl I was betrothed to. She came over to tell me how she really felt when she walked into that little moment I had with my father. Now, she was sitting in front of me, restrained of course. I made sure to gag her, so she wouldn’t scream. I didn’t want anything or anyone ruining our date.

I was awesome at charades and that it what we would play instead of talking, Talking was overrated and what couple did such a thing now a days?

“My dear, Daniela. What brought you over at this hour? The act itself has me warm and fuzzy inside.” I caressed her cheek, expecting to wipe away her neverending tears.

She shook her head, surprising me when she held her gaze with mine. It never wavered. She wanted to tell me something. I knew of that. but what could it be? Could it be a trick? Or, something worth the few minutes I spared her?

Spared. I backed away a bit, not liking the revelation. I wasn’t a killer. I mean, I loved that I could relive this moment with my father, but I didn’t kill innocents. My father wasn’t innocent by a long shot.

I took off her gag and let her speak. It was the right thing to do after all.

“Tell me what you know.” I walked over to my father’s corpse and pulled the knife out from under him. His wound squelched out blood. I could gag.

I trusted her, for now. The first thing she did was nod and not scream her daylights out. She was smart I give her that.

“You’re right about one thing, Chris. This is all in your head. None of this is real,”her eyes held a glint. She was onto something. No wonder I wasn’t feeling like my normal self.

I bit back a chuckle. I didn’t know whether to believe her or not. I admit, I could recall many things from another reality. But, could she be right?

“Okay, say I believe you, what would you have me do?”

“That’s for you to find out. Now do something that would make you happy.”

Desire skyrocketed inside me. I threw the knife away and kissed her, if this would be my last act, then I would never forget it.I ripped the roped that were restraining her.

The world turned to ash.

********

“Doctor! I did it! I bloody did it! All those countless hours having this perv look up my skirt, but I did it in the end.”

Christian Thomas was a man of all sorts. He came to us after a psychotic breakdown with his bride to be. The police found the bastard crushing his fiance, Daniela Curnett to death. It was a sight. The man was sitting on her and kissing her corpse. They were like that for three days. Christian didn’t eat or sleep. He sat there pouring his dying love to her, literally.

Hands wrapped around my waist, I felt a whisper in my ear.

“Great job, Mina. You’ve served me well.” I could sense his smile.

I turned around, wrapping my arms around his neck, snapping it. I took a step to the left and his body sagged it’s way to the floor. I giggled.

“It was all me, Doc, don’t think about getting in my way.” I stepped over him, thinking about where to bury him. Outside would be nice, his grave displayed to all the residents. They’d do well not to cross me.

Christian chuckled. I turned around. He was floating with the help of the specialized lenses I made. He looked as if he was in pain, but his smile radiated the room. I don’t understand.

He should have died after I peered into his worst memory. This man can’t be living.

“Shocker isn’t it?” he adjusted the lens. I saw his eyes through them. They were solely focused on me. “You’d do well to not move at all, my dear. See? When you mess with someone else, something has to be sacrificed.” He wrapped his hands around the cords, linking him to the machine. “Primarily you and your work.”

“Stop! If you do that, we’ll all die.” No. All my work, gone. It took all I had to get that kind of technology and I wouldn’t let it go to waste. These glasses were state of the art and turned humans into opposite beings. When they were happy, it would cause them pain. But, the happiness he was feeling should have killed him. He should have died on the spot!

His hands didn’t move from the ropes. He was that psychotic on the head.

“Then, so be it.” He ripped them from their sockets.

He ignited the flames that perished us all.