"memories"

MEMORIES: something remembered from the past; Lorelei Black hadn't really lucked out in that department, every memory she had led to another and let's just say she had a shit ton of tragic ones, take her first memory for example —

"Remember, Lorelei" Her father put her hair in two little pig tails, handing her a lollipop, so she would stay still and not break out into a dance while he was trying to do so, "I'm— I love you, ok? No matter what happens, I do, I just have to go check up on uncle Prongs and Lils"

"But why can't I come?" Lorelei asked her dad, her grey eyes immediately shining at the thought of meeting her best friend — Birdie Potter, "I want to meet Birdie!"

Sirius looks like he might cry, and Lorelei doesn't like it — even as a two-year-old Lorelei Black could read her father's emotions, so she just sighed dramatically, peaking through her eyes to see her dad giving her a look, "Fine, I'll miss trick or treating, unless you have some candy you could give me...?"

"Alright, Ms Smartypants" Sirius said letting out a teary chuckle, "Nice try, but you're not getting any until you're with your uncle Moony — tell you what, though — you can meet Hope there?"

"Not even skittles?" Lorelei asked as her dad started stuffing her things into a bag, reaching inside his pocket knowingly and handing her the small packet, "I love you, daddy"

Sirius paused, taking a second to look at his daughter, he grabbed her, balancing her on his hip and planted a kiss to the side of her head, "I love you, so so so much"

"You said that already, silly goose" Lorelei chuckled wiggling her eyebrows at her father, he chuckled back though there was something in her eyes that Lorelei had yet to see.

Long story short, before her father dropped her off at the Lupin's, he'd told her he'd be back as soon as he could, he wasn't. Instead, he had to spend twelve years in captivity, unbeknownst to him — James and Lily Potter had been alive and well at the Black-Rosier's, two of the highest ranking members of the Order had taken their place to try and defeat Voldemort, though their attempts remained in vain as they had died and that too as someone else.

The world never got to know and mourn Marie and Jacob.

"We're gonna be just fine, champion" Cedric chuckled pulling a worried Lorelei into a hug, rubbing her back as he did so, "Don't think I'm gonna go easy on you because you're my best friend, though"

Lorelei scoffed, pulling away from his chest, "As if! I'm going to be the one going easy on you, and still win"

"Hmm, you sure about that?" Cedric squinted his eyes, giving Lorelei a playful competitive look, "I'm sure I could beat you"

"Yeah, yeah, we'll see" Lorelei gave him a light shrug, "You ready?"

"As I'll ever be" Cedric winked, "See you in a minute!"

Just then Lorelei felt the ground crumble under her legs, as everything turned into a blur — it felt like she was speeding through time and distance at the same time, and soon she was right at the spot, watching her bestfriend's pale body lay limp on the ground, she walked up to him, taking hesitant steps and as soon as she reached her hand out to touch his face, his eyes opened and he gripped her hand, staring at her with pure hatred, "You could've saved me"

Lorelei felt a hand wrap tightly around her neck, she choked out a sob, "I'm sorr-"

"Why didn't you stop me from going in, El?"

Lorelei opened her eyes with a loud gasp, waking up and immediately throwing the blanket off herself because of the heat — her AC/DC shirt she'd stolen from her aunt clinging to her body because of the sweat and her eyes wide with shock. Her mother — who was sleeping on the couch woke up with a jolt herself — as if she'd sensed her daughter or something.

"Oh, honey" Neveah immediately reached out for her daughter, pulling her into a hug, "Was it another nightmare?"

"I'm fine, Ms Ross" Lorelei said, her voice cracking as she did so, "Could you leave me alone? I don't want to talk right now"

Neveah pulled away, she felt useless — that was her baby girl and she couldn't do anything to help her, "Of course, darling. Happy Birthday" Neveah pressed a kiss to her daughter's forehead.

Lorelei passed her a tight lipped smile and then got out of her bed, she guesses she still has to get used to having a present parent — Neveah did deserve a second chance, she'd tried really hard, I mean she joined Durmstrang as a teacher just to be around Lorelei, unlike someone — cough cough, Lorelei's dad, cough cough — she cared enough to try.

Lorelei stepped inside the bathroom, staring at her reflection as she noticed the bags under her eyes, the splotchy tear streaked cheeks, suck it up, she said to herself, splashing water on her face and then taking a cold shower — something she did to make herself wake up faster, Birdie calls it torture, Lorelei calls it four minutes of pain and four hours of feeling fresh without wanting to crawl into bed and die.

After putting enormous amounts of mascara and chapstick on so she didn't look like a zombie, Lorelei got out of the room she'd trapped herself in for around two days because of a fever and the fact that she didn't want to see her father. Oh, how she regretted opening that bedroom door.

"Happy birthday, Black" George Weasley passed her a crooked smile, he had his hands behind his back and a look Lorelei didn't trust, though she didn't get to be skeptical much longer because the very next moment she felt frosting being rubbed on her face, "Welcome back"

"You son of di-" Lorelei exclaimed, chasing after George as he ran from the brunette, a crazed grin of his face, man, it feels great to start the day off with a prank.

"George what are you doing?" Ginerva sighed, done with her brother's antics as he ducked behind his sister to keep Lorelei away from him, "For Merlin's sake, deal with your own messes" she grabbed George by his shoulders and pushed him forward.

"Hey, George" Lorelei passed him a sarcastic smile, "Wouldn't you like a return gift?" she wiped the frosting off her face, rubbing it on George's face as he scrunched his nose up.

"Lorelei?"

🫐

"SO, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?" Sirius asked, leaning on the table and Lorelei sat on the opposite side with her gaze on the ground, she wanted to scoff so hard at that — like he even cares!

"Fine" said Lorelei, playing with her fingers and ignoring her father's grey eyes in every way possible — one of the most vivid things that she remembers about her father are his eyes. She remembers her father smiling at her, the kind of smile that'll make you think he's the happiest person on Earth with you.

The same smile he passed her when he left her at Remus's house.

"I heard you're transferring back to Hogwarts this year" Sirius said, trying to make some kind of conversation with her.

"Yeah, after Ms Ross saw firsthand the kind of spells they made us practice at Durmstrang, she wanted me to transfer" Lorelei said, still avoiding his eyes, "Plus, doesn't help that the High Master hates me"

"Is it..." Sirius paused, looking over at his daughter who refused to even look at him, "Is it because of me?"

"No" Lorelei reassured quickly, "It's because of Aunt Si or something like that — you know how she is, kickass auror"

"That, she is" Sirius chuckled, "So, uh..." he scratched his head, and watched Lorelei do the same — the corners of his lips quirked up.

"Yeah..." Lorelei dragged on.

"Have you talked to Robin?" asked her father, Lorelei did end looking up and caught a glimpse of his eyes — the same ones she has along with her aunt Sirene and cousin Regan, just his seemed much more dull than they used to be.

"I haven't been able to get out of the house so I couldn't really visit her in St. Mungo's..." Lorelei felt a lump in her throat, "She's hurt really badly, the healers said it might take a full week there to recover"

"Oh..." Sirius said, his expression turning solemn, "Does Harry know?"

"I wrote him a letter," Lorelei shrugged, "he wrote me back — said he wanted to be there for his sister and that it sucks where he lives"

"You went to his house, right?" Lorelei noticed a spark in his father's eyes, "Did they really treat him that badly?"

"I dunno" Lorelei said in a small voice, "When I went they were all kind of outside, I puked, didn't pay much attention..."

"Oh..." Sirius said, once again.

Lorelei scoffed internally, once again. Though this time, she felt something bubbling up inside of her — like she was quite literally going to explode. The thing with the Blacks was — the grey eyes and the shiny Black hair that fell perfectly all the time, freakishly, wasn't all that you inherit — you inherit short temper issues too.

And Lorelei always did have a problem controlling hers.

"Are you done yet?" Lorelei asked, raising her eyes to meet his, a fierce look in them as she stared back at her father's dull looking ones.

"Done with what?" Sirius asked, his brows furrowed with confusion.

"With your act" Lorelei crossed her arms, "You're acting like you care about me, you don't have to, I'm setting you free or whatever, you don't have to be my father"

"Lorelei" Sirius said, his voice stern — the same fiery look in his eyes as his daughter, "Being your father is all I want, if you'd just give me the—"

"You want a chance, Mr Black?" Lorelei said and watched her father deflate, "What about teaching me to play the piano? Wait, shoot you missed it! Ah, wait I have another one — you love Quidditch, right? Here's your chance to teach me how to ride a broom, oh rowena, no! I already know that! Oh, I know — walk me to the platform for the first time, dang it, done that already...um, what else?"

"Lorelei—"

"It's El!" Lorelei shot back, "Don't ask me to give you a chance when you've already missed thousands, you left me, you chose to go after someone instead of being with your own daughter at home! So, trust me when I say this father, you'd be doing us both a whole lot of good if you stop trying just like you've been doing for the last fifteen years"

Lorelei stormed out of the room, leaving an astounded Sirius sitting in the kitchen alone — he'd noticed that Lorelei had used the same tone when saying father that his siblings and him used.

He had a ton of shit to fix and he's not going to sit still until he does.

hey, lolz