Hmmm.... sslightly angsty, slightly fluffy, pretty stupid all around. Mostly *supposed* character development (i hope)

Also,,, ive started another ohmtoonz au!!! I dont wanna spoil it too much, but know that once im down to the last 5 or so chapters of this book, it'll be published!! Basically it's a nice, happy au where one is a heartless killer and the other is a big softie. You can make your assumptions, but i can promise it's not what you're expecting :)

Anyways, onto the next chapter!!! I had some fun experimenting in this one.

--

“Hey. Come on, education's important!” Bryce smiles brightly, innocently holding his hand out for Ryan to take. He giggles softly at Ryan's surprised expression. “I have breakfast in the car, too!”

He's hesitating. As nice as food and education sounds, wallowing in self-pity is just as tempting. It's this knowledge that makes him contemplate one or the other.

Of course, Bryce isn't having any of this. He yanks Ryan up off his bed with a laugh. “Come on! We got tacos and sweet tea! I got you bacon and egg, your favorite!”

It's tempting. It really, really is, but...

"Is... is Luke gonna be there?" He's not sure if he can make it through an entire day of school. If his boyfriend were to show up though, then surely it'll be better, right?

Bryce smiles sweetly. "Yeah, man! Where else would he be?"

Ryan shrugs. He doesn't know if he wants to answer that, because there's a million answers to that question. Luke isn't exactly  fond of school, so to speak. Ryan's positive that Luke would rather sit in an erupting volcano than be at school all day.

He doesn't dare say this out loud though- especially after seeing Bryce’s expression darken to an almost alarming degree.

"I'll make sure of it," he says, voice still soft and sugary sweet. "So don't you worry."

"I..." Ryan has no words for this. He's a little (a lot) intimidated by Bryce. He cannot deny this.

A clean shirt is thrown at Ryan's face, along with a matching pair of jeans and some socks. "Come on! We're gonna be late if we hang around any longer, and I've already hit my tardy limit for the year. Any more and my parents get called, and I'm sure my biology teacher is tired of it by now."

Isn't he taking chemistry? Who takes two science classes?

"I'm taking three, actually. I have physics too. Now get up and put some pants on. I'll dress you myself if I have to!" Bryce crosses his arms in a motherly fashion, giving Ryan a stern glare. He doesn't move an inch, staying perfectly still until Ryan gives in and gets up.

He decides to not question what's happening anymore. He might as well get dressed and go before Bryce rips his head off. 

--

"So... how you holdin' up?" A distinctly Southern voice calls out to him, though it sounds faint to Ryan. He's been lost in thought for a while, blankly staring down at his paper. Has he been like this for all of class? He sure hopes not.

Ryan looks up at Luke. He's staring down at Ryan with a sort of fondness that he's not used to. Instead of the smug, teasing grins he's so used to, there's just a soft, sad expression. Almost as if Ryan's too helpless to handle his own feelings, and Luke has to baby him.

He's not so sure if he likes that or not.

"I'm fine," Ryan announces, smiling at his boyfriend. "How are you doing?"

Luke shrugs, sitting besides Ryan and grabbing his hand. He runs his thumb over Ryan's knuckles gently, "I'm fine so long as you are. You do your work?"

"Nope." He can't help the laugh that comes out of him. It's kinda embarrassing.

To his surprise, Luke just nods. "Mhm. That's fine, I didn't either. You wanna go head to lunch? Bryce says I can't ditch today, so we might as well go see what-"

"Shit they have for us to eat?" Ryan finishes Luke's sentence with a laugh. "Probably nothing good."

They walk in silence, Ryan pressed up against Luke's side with an arm around his waist. It's silent and comfortable, just like it always is. He feels warm, which is odd. He's normally pretty cold, and Luke isn't exactly a space heater, so to speak. He has to pull away from Luke to take off his bunny hoodie, which is a rare thing to see.

Luke offers to hold it for him. Ryan thanks him for the offer and politely declines.

They keep walking together, and it isn't until they're at a set of doors that Ryan realizes they're not going towards the cafeteria.

"Where..." He begins to speak, looking around in confusion.

Then it hits him.

Luke smiles a little at Ryan's realisation. He sits down on the staircase, gesturing for Ryan to sit next to him. He does as asked and looks up at Luke expectantly. Why are they...

"You know, when I first saw you, I was tempted to ask what you did to get your ass kicked so badly," Luke admits as if that explains everything. He laughs, reaching out to stroke Ryan's cheek softly. "Bryce made me return the hoodie. He yelled at me about washing it first, and got Jon to force me to meet you. Except we had already met because I'm an asshole who likes to fight."

Ryan nods automatically. He's thinking pretty hard right now. He vaguely remembers getting beaten up by some angry guys, back on his first day. It never happened again, thankfully. Maybe Luke...

Wait.

"Why bring this up now?" He turns to face Luke curiously, feigning innocence.

Luke shrugs. "Well, you looked sad. And I'm worried about you. So is Bryce, but since I'm your boyfriend he said I'd have to do this 'talking' shit. The only problem is that I'm terrible at it, so I figured I'd coax you into it or something."

Ryan raises an eyebrow. Where's he going with this? "I'm fine, if you're wondering."

"But you're not," Luke argues. "You're so... you're so distant, Ryan. Quiet. You're not yourself, baby, and it worries me. I just wanna make sure my bunny's doin' okay." There's a southern drawl in his voice, and it only gets stronger as Luke goes on. It makes Ryan feel slightly guilty for getting Luke riled up like this.

"I... I know. I'm sor-"

"You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for. You're sad. That's my only problem. You're sad, and I have no idea how to help. But I'll be damned if you're sorry for having basic emotions."

Ryan finds himself giving a laugh. It's not a very happy one (quite the opposite actually). "Then you're already damned to hell or whatever, sorry to break it to you. My... my mom's been-"

"Fuck what she thinks." Luke interjects with a small huff. 

"She says I shouldn't be so sad," he continues. "Went off on some rant about him and me and her and... I don't know. I just forget, I guess. I want to forget."

He feels tears welling up in his eyes, threatening to spill. Determined to not cry for once, Ryan wipes at his eyes and sniffles. He nearly sobs as Luke pulls him close to his chest in a hug, warm and close and safe and loved. He feels so loved here, so, so loved.

So loved, in fact, that Ryan buries his face in Luke's shoulder and takes a moment to calm himself.

"I never got to say goodbye," Ryan eventually mumbles. It's a struggle to speak. His words get caught in his throat and his mouth feels dry. He's not sure how he's doing it. "Nobody... nobody told me until my mom did, when you dropped me off. That's so stupid. I don't even know where he was going to end up in some freak accident or whatever..."

Luke must've heard the growing resentment in Ryan's voice, for he tightens his embrace and rubs small circles into his back. "Nobody did, baby. Nobody got to say goodbye, and it's nothing we can change. We just gotta take a deep breath and try to keep going."

Ryan stays silent for another moment. He frowns, blinking away more tears.

"That's stupid," he announces dejectedly.

Luke shrugs. "Life is stupid."

Now Ryan doesn't know what he was expecting to hear, but that sure wasn't it. And as much as he hates to admit it, it manages to bring a smile to his face.

He can feel Luke smiling too. It makes him feel a bit better.

--

This wasn't the smartest idea. He will admit that with minimal shame.

Ryan stares ahead. In front of him is a small, simple tombstone, with flowers all over it along with a couple photos and various other memoirs. It brings a bitter smile to his lips.

Dad always did love flowers. Too bad his allergies never let him have any.

The funeral was a couple hours ago. Luke had asked him if Ryan wanted to go alone, but Ryan had responded that he wanted Luke to go with him. Even if they only met twice, Ryan is sure they would've liked each other. His dad would've liked all his friends, actually. Except for maybe Evan. But that's because Evan always smells like cinnamon from his favorite drink.

He's not sure how long he's been out here. He just knows he doesn't wanna go home. It doesn't feel like home anymore. Most of his dad's stuff has been packed away by his mother, and now it's almost like he was never there.

It's frustrating. It makes him angry. How can she just do that? Just... shove it all into a closet and act like it doesn't exist. Like she didn't just barge in on Ryan's happy life and...

No. He can't blame his mother for something neither of them could control.

He shakes his head, as if it'll dispel his anger. Maybe he should think of something else. But what?

Ryan stares down at the ground. A single thought comes into his head.

What now? What comes next? Ryan's never been good with change. How does he go on?

He isn't sure. But Luke will help him. Luke always helps, even if he doesn't realize it. And hopefully, Luke can keep helping Ryan out until they're old and gray and Luke's beard is all thin and wispy and-

Oh.

Oh.

What will they do when they graduate at the end of this year? Ryan wants to go to college and study business. What does Luke want to do? Will they ever get married, and if they do, when? Where? Who's walking down the aisle, and who's gonna walk them down?

Fucking hell, they have so much to figure out.

A strong wind suddenly rushes past him, making Ryan shiver. It's winter. It's cold. Ryan momentarily questions his sanity. Why would he willingly sit outside in the dead night of winter just to cry over his father?

He takes one look at the tombstone in front of him and suddenly remembers why he's here.

Now that his father is gone, his mother's come in. She pretty much barged in and sat in his place, if that makes any sense. He feels better sitting out here in the cold, where he doesn't feel judged for crying and can reminisce in peace. Don't get him wrong, he loves his mother, its just that... well, he's having a hard time adjusting.

Everything's happening so fast, and Ryan can't seem to keep up.

"Why are you still out here?" A voice calls out to him, and then Ryan is suddenly staring at big, stern blue eyes. "Come on. You're gonna catch hypothermia."

Ryan shakes his head at Bryce, not wanting to really argue. "Don't wanna leave."

"But the funeral's over and the temperature is literally in the single digits. Luke will murder me if I let you die to frostbite, you know that? Frostbite begins in at freezing tempature."

"I don't wanna go home," he grumbles. "It... It's too quiet."

Bryce shrugs, draping a fuzzy blanket around Ryan. "Then come to mine. We can pretend to watch movies and talk about our feelings."

"I've had enough of feelings. Don't wanna feel them anymore."

He recieves a nod. "That's okay! We can turn on cheesy pop music and sing our hearts out. Or maybe we'll put on some stupid chick flick and cry over their emotional journey or whatever."

Ryan can't stop the small laugh that comes. "What, are you a teenage girl?"

"Well, I am a teenager. Not so sure about the girl part," Bryce says, playfully gesturing to his body. "I don't really have boobs. Trust me, I'd know if I did."

He rolls his eyes, feeling the previous tension within him fade away for now. "And how are we getting home, Baby McQuaid?"

Bryce pouts almost immediately, and Ryan now understands why Luke has a hard time not giving Bryce whatever he wants. It's a very touching sort of gaze, the kind that tugs on your heartstrings and makes you want to give him all your valuables (or maybe a blood sacrifice).

"Just because I can't legally drive doesn't mean I can't. I'll have you know, Jonny's been teaching me. He even made Evan help once, because Jonny can't parallel park. But Evan's not a good teacher," Bryce rambles, and for once Ryan is thankful for it. The mindless chatter is a good distraction from his thoughts.

"Oh, is he now?"

"Uh, yeah! I think he called me a slut once or twice, actually. I'm convinced he's just desperate for Jonathan to like him over me." Bryce pauses to climb into the car, Ryan quick to follow. "He tells me that I'm too needy for Jon to handle. Can you believe that? I like to think I'm far from high maintenance."

Ryan shrugs. "Your cats are more trouble than you are. Evan's just salty sometimes, Bryce. Cut him some slack."

"Nah. I'll give him a chance as soon as he gives me one."

This makes Ryan roll his eyes at his friend, settling for staring out the window. "You guys have such a long way to go."

"We all do," Bryce says wistfully. "We came a long way, but we still have so much more to come. So for now, listen to me tell you about my date with Jonathan on Tuesday! And then when I'm done, I want all the details of you and Luke's first date."

"Please... don't. I don't want to relive the mini golf."

Bryce grins. "I won't, so long as you promise to sing cheesy pop songs with me."

He groans. Does Ryan prefer having to spill his date details to Bryce, or lose his dignity? Ryan thinks back to their first date, when Luke had come early and his dad had to...

"Uh... I'll take the pop songs." He speaks before he makes himself sad again.

Bryce’s excitement is infectious, thankfully. "Heck yeah! Grab my phone and go through my playlists for 'Spicy Time.'"

Ryan does as asked, and has to resist the urge to comment on some.

'3am feelings.'

'Your rebellious phase.'

'Dick sucking tunes.'

'Aesthetic.'

'Siskfn1@*dkkfns.'

He taps the requested playlist. It's full of happy, bubbly pop songs. "Okay, what song?"

"Mm... Hollaback Girl. You know what that is. If you don't, I'm judging you and disowning you. And you have to sing loud, okay? Trust me, it's freakishly therapeutic."

Ryan laughs. "You're such a... You're so weird, Bryce."

Bryce winks. "I'm not changing anytime soon, so good luck!"