a random person holding this dazai nendo: teehee so cute omg

chuuya: oh god almighty if you're ever in existence... i don't care anymore if you sit in heaven sipping your cup of human tears or if you actually do your fucking job. i just want you to fucking end this fucking civilization that makes some cute as fuck mini statues of that bitch dazai which i can't afford because mori deducts the cost of collateral damage from my fucking salary even though akutagawa destroys them buildings and not me.

chuuya, a little more emo now: it also sucks because he's fucking popular and all these goddamned girls and boys are fangirling over him and that he doesn't bother to fucking notice me anymore when i send him letters because everyone else does nowadays. like, it's so fucking hard to deal with yourself and hold back from ruining his fansigns just so you can get atleast thirty minutes of talk with him about small stuff.

chuuya, utterly emo and negative now: i can't even ask him about the weather anymore.

mori, walking into the office 3 hours later because he summoned the short hat and he hasn't arrived yet: nakaharOHMYGOD WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE I SEE A WHOLE FUCKING COLLECTION OF DAZAI PLUSHIES, BODY PILLOWS, NENDOS, POSTERS AND ALL THAT SHIT.

chuuya: apparently, god heard my cries and he dumped merchandise on me so i can be less lonely.

mori: oh.

mori, realizing what shit happened: oh okay. so the fangirls had to pacify you because you were in rage. i see.

god: fuck you, it was i.

mori: oh my god okay.

chuuya: so what do we do now? i have-- *falls to the floor smiling blankly and hugs an x-rated body pillow* lots *chews a plushie* orhf dhuzsae nao

mori: everyone, you have to crack the code

chuuya: kherun vie nouight wir sharfh avair

mori: no, that wasn't german. nor was it audible.

elise, running through the hallways: s o u k o k u u u u u

chuuya: nein nein nein nein nein nein nein nein nein nein

mori: wir wir wir wir wir wir wir wir wir wir wir wir wir

ango: ist das der annoying idiot

odasaku's ghost: nein, das der faggot

kaji: bonjour mözerficker

mori: ni hao ma, lemon bomba

kaji: amigo, amigo, fen fang mei li man zhuya

akutagawa: core, core, dio mio, mama mia

nathaniel: he literally just spoke three languages, der tüfel

steinbeck: kore wa mezurashii desu ne

lucy: uruse, this is not nihon desu

steinbeck: eh? kedo, you just spoke in nihongo, you baka

the one person who was holding a dazai nendo: what. the. fuck.

the nendo: por que, mes ami?

the otaku: jebalyo, oppa, oppa, saranghae

the nendo: *falls apart and crumbles into dust*

the otaku: oh em gee, i have sh*ga*aki tom*ra's superpowers!!! *runs off and forgets all about the dazai nendo*

the nendo: putangina mo iiwanan mo nalang ako dito gago, däs mitleid pagkatapos mo magsabi ng putanginang oppa oppa mo, holy shit, omae no sutairu wa daikirai. i feel ärger!

fitzgerald in an extremely pompous british accent: is this moneh? does this involve moneh? then i am all foh the moneh! yee-haw, you sukis!!!

lovecraft: we could literally call this place... the mountains of madness. *finger guns at the actual h.p. lovecraft*

you: i didn't get that.

twain, screaming from above in his plane: READ BOOKS YOU BITCHCUNTS.

hester prynne: *slaps twain with a scarlet fish*

margaret: go back to your own book, goddamit! nathaniel, tame this bitch!

pearl: DON'T CALL MY MOMMY A BITCH!

gatsby: KID STOP

tom sawyer: CAN WE ALL JUST GO TO AN ADVENTURE NEAR THE RIVERBANKS?

severeux düfriche: hah! that's lame. let's slae sum kiddiez

oliver twist: you're not an official book, get out.

yozo: can you all just shut up because we all die anyways.

takeichi: yes, yozo, you and the way you fucking barged into my home and-- wait. was that my home or horiki's?

>> THE WRITER OF THIS SHIT IS CONFUSED NOW.

... not as confused as you are. <<

naomi: why is oliver twist even here anyways

naomi tanizaki: fuck off, go back to your book

chuuya, now in rage and confusion: CAN YOU ALL JUST GO BACK TO YOUR FUCKING BOOKS?!

alceste vernier: does an incomplete book stored in a laptop count?

mori: yes it does.

atsushi, looking at the shitface typing this and so done with everyone's shit: and does shutting the fuck up count as consideration for other people's peace?

everyone shutting up for a few seconds: kid. in our anime, there is no real peace.

atsushi: *self-conscious screaming*

chuuya: NEEEEIIIIINNNNNNN *eats a dildo modelled after dazai's duck*

Yes, duck.

Kunikida: someone pls explain this script.

____ and they lived happily ever aftar ____

Ok this is what "RANDOM STUFF" means, my hoes. i hope the offenses were kept to a minimal because i don't want to get reported or some shit by sensitive assfaces.

Have a yami kawaii version of kyouka-chan because she didn't appear anywhere in this chapter. Honestly, i actually forgot about her omfg. Been so long since this anime. Art not mine i can't draw good shit k

Also some dazai and mafia dazai, whose appearance in this chapter came as a nendo.

because i know y'all are hungry for this bitch

so is chuuya.