"You're a little heavier than I want you to be. Have you been eating desserts with every meal?" Irena asked as she looked at the weight chart.

I had meticulous tracked my weight for the last two weeks. It should have been applauded, instead Irena looked disappointed.  

"Not every time," I admitted shyly. Just most of the time.

"But enough times. I want you to cut sugar from your diet completely. To be the best skater, you need to be lighter. I want you to lose at least 10 pounds." 

Sweets were not something I ate in Hell so why did it feel so crushing to leave behind? Controlling my days and exercise wasn't enough. Now my diet was something she held. Slowly Irena and figure skating consumed my life. Never did I imagine that I would eat breathe and sleep skating. I never thought it would take this much effort to be the 'best'. But yet, I wanted to do everything she recommend because skating was a drug, and I wanted it all. I wanted to be the best. 

"Alright, so today your schedule includes an hour of off ice training and an hour of ballet." 

"No on ice practice today?" 

She shook her head. "Not today. Mixing it up a little," she said as she glanced at the rink. 

"What do you mean there's no ice today." Constance asked in a shrill voice. 

I braced myself for her standard temper tantrums as my head snapped towards her direction. The rest of the people at the rink were fine, just Constance. Every little thing set her off. It was exhausting. 

Ari rolled his eyes. "Mental that one is." He thumbed over to Constance. "She's just upset that you're passing her in skill level." 

I shook my head, not wanting to believe it. Constance had been here for over two years. She extended her contract to improve. She was probably the best woman figure skater we had. How could I pass her skill level already?

He shrugged. "Listen, I'm not being dramatic about it. I think everyone can see it." 

"Telvi, come here." Irena waved me over to her.

I never realized she walked that far from me. Quickly I ran to her without wasting a second. 

"You're requested by the council for a performance. The program we have worked on will suffice. Polish it up. Be ready in two days." 

A performance. In front of people? Two days did not seen like enough time. A lump formed in my throat. Never did I think I would preform in front of others. Wasn't there someone else? Anyone else? Fear clenched my heart as the words sank in. There was a reason why I skated on the edge of town. I was not made for skating in front of anyone. That was something that I could not do. I couldn't. 

"You do not have a choice, Telvi. It is part of your agreement. We provide you lessons, and you have to provide the Motherwealth with something in return."

And the shows were something that I would have to give.

"How does she get a performance and not me?" Constance yelled as she walked up to us. 

Here goes another melt down. 

Irena eyed her. "I think you know the reason." 

Constance shrunk back as her eyes welled up with tears. "You stupid girl." She pointed towards me. "How dare you take everything from me." 

I took a step from her. It wasn't like I wanted this. If I could, I would give her the performance. It seemed like she wanted it. 

She hickuped, covering her mouth then ran off.

"Don't pay attention to her. You just need to relax. I know you will do well." Irena placed her hand on my shoulder showing her many gold rings on her fingers.

How did Irena know I would do well if I had never skated in front of anyone? Practice was one thing. Completely different than a show. I was pretty sure I wouldn't be just fine. The thought caused my throat to tighten. I was about to disappoint a lot of people.

"Well, let's get started on off ice training today. We're just wasting time here," she said as she clapped her hands. "We'll pair off, Telvi, be with Ari." 

I looked over at Ari who waved. Without saying anything, I walked over to him. 

"It's about time we became partners. Irena kept pairing me with Constance so thank the lords that is ending. You're so quiet, this will really help me to get to know you better." 

But the thing was, there wasn't anything to get to know. I was a poor girl from Hell. He already knew that. What else was there? 

"Alright, let's run two miles to start." 

Ari sighed as he took off his coat, throwing it over a bench. "Son of a twister. I hate slag running." 

I don't think I had ever run for fun before. It was always related to getting out of the cold or rain. I wouldn't say I liked it, but I didn't hate it. Without complaining, I started to run, following Ari. 

"So a performance, hu? That's big," Ari started. 

I frowned. I didn't want to think about it. Instead, let's just push that to the farthest corners of my mind. 

"You should be excited. This is what we train for. This is what we offer the Motherwealth. We train to give them a show. And we all know the Motherwealth loves a show."

"Have you ever performed for them?"

He nodded with a huff. "Too many times to count. Some big shows, some small. They really love their figure skating here." 

"And why is Constance so upset about it?" 

He smiled. "It's because you took her spot. It was going to be her performing in two days. Instead, they kicked her out and picked you last minute." 

I mouthed an 'oh' which Ari chuckled at. If she wanted it, she could have it. It's not like I wanted it.

"When I practiced in my Commonwealth, I used to perform for anyone who would watch. Most figure skaters love to be in the spotlight. I know I do."

"I don't," I muttered.

"Well that much is clear. I saw the sheer look of terror on your face when Irena said you were picked. I think that's one reason Constance hates you even more. Ever since you came, you have challenged her. She feels like she is losing, and she hates that. She wants to be the best but with you around, that might not be possible." 

I wasn't completing against anyone. I wanted to improve because that was why I was here. Constance wasn't meant to get hurt in the process.

"You might not find this a competition, but most people here do. Why do you think we spend all our time together? It's because we're trying to sabotage each other." 

"It doesn't seem like you are trying to do that with me." 

He shrugged. "You're a girl. I have nothing to feel threatened about. But, Rowin." He pointed behind us to where a boy struggled to keep up. "He is my competition. But there is no way he'll be better than me so I have nothing to worry about. We all are competing for spots. The better you are, the more perks you get. If you are the best, you might even be offered a spot in the government here. They'll give you and your family a pass to come here and live. There are so many things that they can offer us, and we all want them." 

Stuck in the Motherwealth sounded like a nightmare. Hell was calling me and that was where I could go in two years. There wasn't anything the Motherland could offer me except removing taxes from our small house. 

He chuckled. "Something tells me that you don't want any of it. If you didn't want it, why are you here?" 

"We needed a way to pay for the taxes of our house so we won't starve." 

"Walter, Telvi. That's terrible." He sighed as he started to run a little faster to get back to the rink. 

My lungs burnt as I pushed a little harder, pulling ahead of Ari. We were on the home stretch, and we all knew that as soon as we were finished with our work outs, we could go home. That was what we all wanted. 

_____________________

By time I got back to the dorms, my coat was draped over my shoulders even though it was lightly snowing around me. The cold felt nice after completing the workout Irena had us do. Sweat beated around my forehead and my legs felt tight. Skating would have been easier than this. 

"Hey Telvi!" I heard Eydis shout to me.

I stopped in mid walk as I looked around, trying to find her. As my head looked up, I found her, sitting on the roofs' edge of the five-story dorm building, overlooking the ground below. 

She waved at me with a smile as a giggle escaped her lips. She looked happier than I had seen in a few days. 

"What are you doing?" I asked as her feet dangled above me. 

"Come, join me!" she cheered. She was carefree again. Maybe one day I would be carefree like that.

five stores high seemed unnatural. Only birds stayed at that height. I didn't want to follow. But her smile was so inviting. I think I would follow her anywhere. 

By time I made it to the roof, Eydis had not moved. "Took you long enough." She giggled. 

It took me a minute to muster up the courage to walk out the door. There were a few minutes of silence as I tried to will myself to open the door to the roof. There was a lot of internal back and forth. 

She handed me a bottle with honey colored liquid in it. I refused to take it. "Suit yourself, but you're missing out." 

"Are you alright?" I asked softly. There was something in her eyes that told me there was something wrong. Her smile wasn't as bright, and her laugh wasn't as contagious. I had sensed it for a few days, but I didn't know how to bring it up. 

She let out a shaky breath and shook her head. "I don't know." 

I sat down beside her and let my legs hang over the edge. The ground was so small from up here. I turned my attention to Eydis. Looking down was not an option. 

The wind was colder up here. It made me feel sick to my stomach. I glanced at the ground below for just a second before turning my attention to her. 

"I don't know what will happen once I'm gone from the training program. What's left for me? Will I go back to Solano and help the city improve? Will I get a big job here? I already gave them so much. I'm not sure if I want to give them more. But I have been here long enough that I don't know what else to do." 

I nodded. Tears threatened to spill over her eyes. My heart broke. I didn't want to see her cry. There had to be something I could do.  

"I have worked tirelessly for them, solving equations after equations with little pay. I don't know if it will continue even if I leave campus."

She couldn't leave. She had to stay in in Regal. I needed her. She had to know that. Hopefully she did because I was too afraid to say it out loud. 

We were silent for a moment. until I spoke up. "I have been requested in a performance." 

Her head snapped up to me with wide eyes. "So soon? You must be breaking a record, Telvi."

That was the last thing I wanted to do. I didn't want to have heads turn my way. I just wanted to do my two years and leave, quietly. Stress the quietly. "Have you done something like that before?"

She chuckled. "No one wants to watch math. But ice skating is another story. You might have realized this already, but different skills demand different requests. I worked in offices when I'm not training. You on the other hand will perform. That is just your lot." 

The thought of preforming sent a shiver down my spine. 

She wrapped her arm around me. Even the simplest of touch from her comforted me. "Keep your head up. This is good. If you are extremely skilled, you might even go abroad and show case your skills elsewhere." 

But that sounded terrible. The Motherwealth was already enough. I didn't want to leave the country. "Have you left the country before?"

She shook her head. "Nah. But I had a friend that did. She never came back. Wrote me a letter later on telling me how great it was abroad and how she was going great things over there." She let out a sigh and looked at the ground. "Going abroad is left only for the most special people." 

"I think you're special," I blurted out before I had time to think about what I said.

Her head snapped up again to meet my eyes. She placed her hand on mine and smiled. "You're special to me as well." With that she got up and stood on the barrier of the roof, making my heart race. 

"What are you doing?" 

She smiled again, flashing her pearly white teeth at me. "Walking on the edge. What do you think?"

My heart squeezed in places that I never thought possible. "Please stop."

She jumped down and chuckled. "You never have walked on the edge before, have you?"

Never in my life. It was safe to stay far away from it. I shook my head at her. Coming here was the most on edge thing I've ever done.

"You should sometime. You don't know what you're missing." 

There was no way I was missing out on anything. One wrong step and she would fall to her death. That was what the edge brought. That was something I never had to worry about. 

"Now come, let's get dinner. We should celebrate your performance!"