"You're a little heavier than I want you to be. Have you been eating desserts with every meal?" Irena ask as she looks at the weight chart.

I had meticulous tracked my weight for the last two weeks. It should be applauded, instead Irena looks disappointed.

"Not every time," I admit shyly. Just most of the time.

"But enough times." She gives me a pointed look. "I want you to cut sugar from your diet completely. To be the best skater, you need to be lighter. I want you to lose at least 10 pounds."

Sweets are not something I ate in Hell so why did it feel so crushing to leave behind? Controlling my days with exercise isn't enough. Now my diet is something to be controlled. Irena and figure skating is slowly consuming my life. Never did I imagine that I would eat breathe and sleep skating. I never thought it would take this much effort to be the 'best'. But yet, I want to do everything she recommends because skating is a drug, and I want it all. I want to be the best.

"Alright, so today your schedule includes an hour of off ice training and an hour of ballet."

"No on ice practice today?"

She shakes her head. "Not today. Mixing it up a little," she says as she glances at the rink.

"What do you mean there's no ice today." Constance asks in a shrill voice.

I brace myself for her standard temper tantrums. They are daily. Anything will set her off. The rest of the people at the rink are fine, just Constance. She is exhausting.

Ari rolls his eyes. "If she wasn't so good at skating..." He thumbs over to Constance. "She's just upset that you're passing her in skill level."

I shake my head, not wanting to believe it. Constance had been here for two years. She even extended her contract to improve. She is probably the best woman figure skater at the rink. I have only been here for a mere few weeks. How could I pass her skill level already?

He shrugs. "Listen, I'm not being dramatic about it. I think everyone can see it."

"Telvi, come here." Irena waves me over.

I didn't realize she walked so far from me. Quickly I run over without wasting a second. Best not to give her a reason to yell at me.

"You're requested by the council for a performance. The program we have worked on will suffice. Polish it up. Be ready in two days."

A performance. In front of actual people? Two days does not seem like enough time. A lump forms in my throat. I am here to train, never did I think I would preform in front of others. Isn't there someone else? Anyone else? Fear clenches my heart as the words sank in. There is a reason why I skated on the edge of town. I am not made for skating in front of anyone. That is something that I cannot do. I couldn't.

"You do not have a choice, Telvi. It is part of your agreement. We provide you lessons, and you have to provide the Motherwealth with something in return."

And the shows were something I would have to give.

"How does she get a performance and not me?" Constance yells as she walks up to us.

Here comes another melt down. As if that will make things better.

Irena eyes her. "I think you know the reason."

Constance shrinks back as her eyes well with tears. "You stupid girl." I'm pretty sure she doesn't know my name. She points towards me. "How dare you take everything from me."

I take a step from her. It isn't like I wanted this. If I could, I would give her the performance. It seems like she wants it.

She hiccups then covers her mouth and runs off.

"Don't pay attention to her. You just need to relax. I know you will do well." Irena places her hand on my shoulder showing her many gold rings on her fingers.

How did Irena know I would do well if I never skated in front of anyone? Practice is one thing. Completely different than a show. I am pretty sure I wouldn't be just fine. My throat tightens. I am about to disappoint a lot of people.

"Well, let's get started on off ice training today. We're just wasting time here," she says as she claps her hands. "We'll pair off, Telvi, be with Ari."

I look over at Ari who waves. Without saying anything, I walk over to him.

"It's about time we became partners. Irena kept pairing me with Constance so thank the lords that is ending. You're so quiet, this will really help me to get to know you better."

But the thing is, there wasn't anything to get to know. I am a poor girl from Hell. He already knows that. What else is there?

"Alright, let's run two miles to start."

Ari sighs as he take off his coat, throwing it over a bench. "Son of a twister. I hate slag running."

I don't think I had ever run for fun before. It was always related to getting out of the cold or rain. I wouldn't say I liked it, but I didn't hate it.

Without complaining, I start to run, following Ari.

"So a performance, hu? That's big," Ari starts.

I frown. I don't want to think about it. Instead, let's just push it to the farthest corners of my mind.

"You should be excited. This is what we train for. This is what we offer the Motherwealth. We train to give them a show. And we all know the Motherwealth loves a show."

"Have you ever performed for them?"

He nods with a huff. Surprisingly, he's already out of breath. "Too many times to count. Some big shows, some small. They really love their figure skating here."

"And why is Constance so upset about it?"

He smiles. "It's because you took her spot. It was going to be her performing in two days. Instead, they kicked her out and picked you last minute."

I mouth an 'oh' which Ari chuckles at. If she wants it, she can have it.

"When I practiced in my Commonwealth, I used to perform for anyone who would watch. Most figure skaters love to be in the spotlight. I know I do."

"I don't," I mutter.

"Well that much is clear. I saw the sheer look of terror on your face when Irena said you were picked. I think that's one reason Constance hates you even more. Ever since you came, you have challenged her. She feels like she is losing, and she hates that. She wants to be the best but with you around, that might not be possible."

I'm not completing against anyone. I want to improve, to keep up with everyone else. This is not a competition for me. I feel guilty. Constance isn't meant to get hurt in the process.

"You might not find this a competition, but most people here do. Why do you think none of the girls talk to you? Or why the rest spend all their time together? It's because we're trying to sabotage each other."

"It doesn't seem like you are trying to sabotage me."

He shrugs. "You're a girl. I have nothing to feel threatened about. We all are competing for spots, glory, shows. The better you are, the more perks you get. If you are the best, you might even be offered a good paying job after your contract. They'll give you and your family a pass to come here and live. There are so many things that they can offer us, and we all want them."

Stuck in the Motherwealth sounds like a nightmare. There isn't anything else the Motherland can offer me to make me want to stay longer.

He chuckles. "Something tells me that you don't want any of it. If you didn't want it, why are you here?"

"We needed a way to pay for the taxes of our house so we won't freeze or starve."

"Walter, Telvi. That's terrible." He sighs as he runs a little faster to get back to the rink.

My lungs burn as I push harder, pulling ahead of Ari. We are on the home stretch, and we all know that as soon as we are finished with our workouts, we can go home. That is what we all wanted.

_____________________

By time I get back to the dorms, I'm wet and sticky from sweat. My coat is draped over my shoulders even though it is lightly snowing around me. The cold feels nice after completing the workout Irena had us do. Sweat beads around my forehead and my legs feels tight. Skating would have been easier than this.

"Hey Telvi!" I heard Eydis shout.

I stop in mid walk, craning my neck to find her. As I look up towards the sky, I see her. She's sitting on the roofs' edge of the five-story dorm building, overlooking the ground below.

She waves to me as a giggle escape her lips. She looks happier than I have seen in a few days. Ever since she walked out of the dorm a few days ago, she has been distant. I tried asking a few questions but she shut me down. Instead of pushing it, I left her alone.

I missed her smile. It is nice to see again, even if she is so far from me.

"What are you doing?" I ask as her feet dangle above me.

"Come, join me!" she cheers. She is carefree again.

five stores high seem unnatural. Only birds stay at that height. I don't want to follow. But her smile is so inviting. When she looks at me like that, I think I would follow her anywhere.

I run up the stairs towards the roof, fighting against the ache in my legs. When I make it out into the fresh air, Eydis has not moved.

"Took you long enough." She giggles.

Well, it took me a minute to muster up the courage to walk out the door. She doesn't need to know that.

I walk towards her. Wind wipes around my face. I shutter. The wind is colder up here.

She hands me a bottle with honey colored liquid in it. I refuse to take it. "Suit yourself, but you're missing out."

"Are you alright?" I ask softly. There is something in her eyes that tell me she isn't. Seeing her up close, I notice her smile isn't as bright, and her laugh isn't as contagious.

She lets out a shaky breath and shakes her head. "I don't know."

I sit down beside her and let my legs hang over the edge even though my heart races. My hands grip onto the edge for extra support. People pass below us, not noticing us. I can see everything. People are so small from up here. I think I'm going to be sick.

I turn my attention to Eydis.

"I don't know what will happen once I'm gone from the training program. What's left for me? Will I go back to Solano and help the city improve? Will I get a big job here? I already gave them so much. I'm not sure if I want to give them more. But I have been here long enough that I don't know what else to do."

Tears threaten to spill over her eyes. My heart breaks even though I wish I can leave the training program early.

"I have worked tirelessly for them, solving equations after equations with little pay. I don't know if it will continue even if I leave campus."

I place my hand over hers. I don't want to see her cry.

She gives a sad smile. "I don't want to leave yet."

And I don't want her to leave. She cannot. She has to stay in in Regal. I need her. She must know that. Hopefully she does because I am too afraid to say it out loud.

We are silent for a moment. until I speak up. "I have been requested in a performance."

Her head snaps up to mine with wide eyes. "So soon? You must be breaking a record, Telvi."

That is the last thing I want to do. I don't want to have heads turn my way. I just want to do my two years and leave, quietly. "Have you done something like that before?"

She chuckles. "No one wants to watch math. But ice skating is another story. You might have realized this already, but different skills demand different requests. I worked in offices when I'm not training. You on the other hand will perform. That is just your lot."

The thought of preforming sends a shiver down my spine.

She wraps her arm around me, pulling me into her. Even the simplest of touch from her comforts any fears. "Keep your head up. This is good. If you are extremely skilled, you might even go abroad and show case your skills elsewhere."

That sounds terrible. The Motherwealth is already enough. I don't want to leave the country. "Have you left the country before?"

She shakes her head. "Nah. But I had a friend that did. She never came back. Wrote me a letter later on telling me how great it was abroad and how she was going great things over there." She let out a sigh and looks towards the ground. "Going abroad is left only for the most special people."

"I think you're special," I blurt out quickly, awkwardly. My cheeks are hot.

Her head snaps up again to meet my eyes. "You're special to me as well." With that she gets up and stands on the barrier of the roof, making my heart race even faster.

"What are you doing?"

She smiles, flashing her pearly white teeth at me. "Walking on the edge. What do you think?"

My heart squeezes in places that I never thought possible. "Please stop."

She jumps down and chuckles. "You never have walked on the edge before, have you?"

Never in my life. It is safe to stay far away from it. I shake my head at her. Coming here to the Motherwealth is the most on edge thing I've ever done.

"You should sometime. You don't know what you're missing."

There is no way I am missing out on anything. One wrong step and she will fall to her death. That was what the edge brought. That is something I never had to worry about.

"Now come, let's get dinner. We should celebrate your performance!"

Even though I am not excited about it, I agree. If she is happy about it, maybe I should be to.