Bucky awoke slowly. His body felt like lead and his mouth was so dry it felt like it was full of cotton balls. His muscles felt like he had just run a marathon even though he knew for a fact he hadn't. He knew this feeling all too well. It was happening more and more now. It was some new and awful routine. He opened his eyes carefully and squinted against the bright light above him. The lights were always so damn bright. 

"Welcome back to the living," Natasha said quietly so she didn't hurt his pounding head. They had gotten used to what his symptoms would be when he woke up. She was trying to joke and sound like she was in a good mood, but her voice sounded sad and when he looked over he noticed the dark circles under her eyes. She was exhausted. 

"Hey..." his voice sounded as weak and rough as he felt. It barely made a sound and cracked a bit at the end. Just the one word made his throat burn. 

Natasha grabbed a paper cup from the side table and got up to fill it in the sink. 

Bucky very carefully eased himself into a position where he was sitting up a bit. He closed his eyes when the room started to spin. His head was pounding so hard he could've sworn his heart had replaced his brain. 

Natasha came back with the water and sat beside him. She gently placed the cup in his hand, "you got that?" she asked, still holding it a bit so he didn't drop it. 

Bucky nodded slightly in response and tightened his grip on the cup. Once he was ready, he carefully raised the cup and took a couple sips. The cold water soothed his throat. 

Bucky had been getting what Tony called "episodes" for months now. There was no specific trigger for it. One moment he could be brushing his hair or doing the dishes, the next moment he was convulsing on the ground. No doctors could find out what was wrong. Bruce assumed that it was some sort of after-effect of what Hydra did to his brain. That was the most realistic thing they could come up with. The worst part was that nothing was helping. They tried giving him Acetazolamide which was used to treat patients with epilepsy. it only worked for about two weeks though. This other drug they had been trying lately was  Carbamazepine. It was the best working one so far. He had lasted three weeks without an episode. But now he had one so they would have to try something new again. He was tired of it. He always felt out of it from the drugs and then he felt out of it when he wasn't on them because this would happen and he would be stuck in the hospital all disoriented. It was a vicious cycle. 

Natasha respected his silence for about twenty minutes while he regained his awareness. She spoke after that. "I brought you some clothes if you want to get changed. You're always complaining about how cold and scratchy the hospital clothes are." 

Bucky nodded, "thanks, Nat..."

"No problem," she placed the clothes on the end of the bed. 

Bucky very carefully sat up a little more and placed the cup of water on the side table.

"Do you need help?" she asked gently. This was the second time Steve hadn't been there when this happened. Natasha had helped him that time too. It wasn't awkward for either of them. He trusted her and he knew that she wasn't attracted to him at all. They were family. 

Bucky nodded, "yes, please..."

She nodded as well and picked up Steve's hoodie that she had brought for him. She eased the thin t-shirt off of him and gently put the hoodie on him. She left the hood on his head because she knew how cold he got.  After that, she helped him sit on the edge of the bed. She took off the thin hospital pants and guided his jogging pants onto him. "Thank you..." Bucky said.

"No problem," Nat said back. She helped him lay back down and pulled the blanket over him. Now they just had to wait until the doctor cleared him to go home. 

***

Three hours later, the doctor decided that it would be okay for him to go home. He gave Natasha a bottle of some different medication to give him before he left to get a wheelchair. The atmosphere was a lot different in the room now. It was dark outside, and Natasha had turned off the lights for him. The only light came from the small lamp against the wall. He felt a lot more relaxed when it was like this. The doctor returned with the wheelchair and disconnected him from the heart monitor and the IV before he helped him into the chair. He left once again to grab something else and while he was gone, a very distraught looking Steve rushed through the door. Bucky had his left elbow propped on the armrest and his face was resting in his metal hand. His eyes were closed because his head was still killing him.

"Bucky!" Steve whisper-yelled as he rushed to his side.

Bucky opened his blue eyes which were duller than usual. He looked up at Steve in confusion, "Steve, why are you here...?" Steve was still in his suit. It didn't seem to be as damaged as it usually got on missions, but it was still quite dirty. It was covered in ash and so was Steve's face and hair, His hair was sticking up because he had probably been wearing his helmet. 

"Natasha texted me. I came as soon as I could." He placed his hand on his arm gently and kissed his head softly.

"You know the drill, Steve... I'm fine... You didn't need to leave your mission for me..."

"You're the most important thing to me right now, Buck. I couldn't just stay away while you were in pain..."

Bucky sighed softly. 

"We are going to fix this," Steve reminded him, "it'll all be over soon..."