don't ever tame your demons

just keep them on a leash

Chapter One—She Wishes It Was Dark

"God fucking damn it!" I cursed, slamming my hands down on the steering wheel of the car I had been driving in. Out of gas. I shouldn't be so upset. I expected this to happen, as soon as I started my drive with a quarter tank of gas. I reached over to the passenger seat and pulled over my map, opening it wide. East. I needed to head east to get to Atlanta. I looked up in attempt to find any street signs, but no avail. I was in the middle of nowhere—near a quarry.

     "Come on y/n..." I whispered to myself, slowly stepping out of my car and reaching into the backseat to grab my backpack, tucking my folded map into my pocket. "You've hiked trails before. This won't be that hard." I breathed. "Maybe you could get down to that quarry for water."

Man, talking to yourself really makes you seem insane.

I hoisted my bag over my shoulder and began walking, leaving my poor Toyota behind. I'll miss you, Betty. It had been my car since college days. She took me everywhere. From Kings County to Boston once, but that's besides the point. I began walking on the side of the road, and that's how it went for hours.

     My feet carried me almost four miles around the quarry, at least that's what it felt like. I couldn't really tell, but I could see the sunset coming along. I couldn't be out here at night, not with just my knife. A knife I found in a drawer when raiding a house. What? It's not like they were gonna come back for it. As I walked along the side of the road, I could just barely hear distinct chatter amongst a group of people. "Oh no..." I thought. People. What if they were raiders too? They could kill me on the spot. But what if they're good people? They could help me get to Atlanta—to the refugee center.

I crouched down behind the weeds, and slowly inched my way closer. My feet burned from all my walking and my stomach ached for a meal, but now wasn't the time to think about it. I slowly peered through the weeds, and low and behold, there was a camp flowing with people left and right. Children and adults alike. I could just smell the cooking fish on the fire. It made my stomach growl in a quiet rumble. I placed my hand on my stomach, and patted it in attempt to quiet it down.

"Hey—" I was barely paying attention when hiding, and now I was spotted by someone. A tall man, with black fluffy hair, and a prominent nose bridge. "Hey, who the hell-"

"Stay back!" I suddenly shouted. Clearly I wasn't thinking straight. I pulled my knife from my pocket and pointed it at him, only to see him raise his hands.

     "Hey! Whoa whoa, watch the knife!" He ushered, but I kept my stance. Ready to attack at any moment. "Who are you?" He didn't bother looking me in my eyes, he was trained on watching the knife.

"Does it matter? I'm just getting by. I don't want any trouble—"

     "Don't want any trouble, yeh? Then why'd ya pull a knife?"

Damn it. He has a point, but I had to remind myself the dangers of people nowadays. I was just attacked a few days ago, I couldn't let my guard down. Not now, not ever again. I narrowed my eyes and kept my knife raised, watching as he took a small step forward, causing me to take a small step back. Who did this guy think he was?

"Listen, I'm a cop." He started, his hands slowly motioning me to lower the knife, "I'd like to just talk to you, can I do that? Can we talk? Maybe get ya somethin' to eat?"

Something to eat? My stomach cramped at the thought of food. Little by little, I lowered my knife, and tucked it into my pocket again. I stood up straight and looked down at his hand that he had offered. Was he seriously waiting for a polite introduction? As if the apocalypse never happened? I slowly held out my hand and grasped his, giving it a firm shake.

"Firm grip there, little lady." He chuckled and it made me narrow my eyes yet again. Little lady? "How'd you get here?"

"I walked about four miles down the quarry. Had to leave my car behind." I said, slowly following the man through the entrance of the camp.

My anxiety spiked when I could feel all eyes on me now, but quickly followed the man over to the fire pit where two slabs of fish was cooking. I could practically feel my mouth water at the sight of the food. Hell, I could even see some seasoning on it. It smelled of lemon pepper rub and salt. He cut a piece off the fish and laid it on a disposable plate, slowly handing it to me with a plastic fork. I took it with a soft thank you and sat myself on one of the logs beside the fire. I began digging into my food, a groan escaping my lips. I was right. The lemon and pepper coated my tongue in such a wonderful way as I ate.

I barely noticed the people gathering around, but the man that brought me here had kneeled in front of me, a stern gaze now on his face. My stomach churned, and not just from the fish. I was nervous now. Why did I just accept a plate of food from strangers? How could I be so stupid?!

"Easy..." he began, shifting slightly, "My name is Shane Walsh. And like I said before, I'm a cop."

"Being a cop before the world went to shit doesn't bring me any comfort." I snapped softly, setting my plate of fish aside. "You could be serial killers for all I know."

"Serial killers offer people food? Shelter?" He chuckled softly and motioned everyone away, and they dispersed. All except for one. A pretty woman, with long brown hair and a blue flannel tied around her waist. "Lori." He said, almost in a scolding manner. The woman merely looked at him, then back at me.

"How did you find us?" She asked softly, taking a seat beside Shane.

I swallowed away the rising lump in my throat and looked over the pretty woman—Lori. "I was just...walking." I breathed out, furrowing my eyebrows together. "Then I heard talking and got frightened, so I hid. And that's when he found me."

"You have a group?"

I shook my head, "been on my own since everything began. I've been raiding houses as I went along King's county."

"Kings county?" Shane raised his eyebrows, "we're from there. What's your name?"

"Y/n." I hesitantly picked up my plate of food and took a bite of the fish, watching as Shane's eyes lit up. What was with this guy?

"Y/n L/n?" He asked, causing my heart to beat right through my chest. How did he—"we went to high school together. I was the one that stole the principal's car." He grinned, "dated your friend, Sheila?"

My eyes widened and I almost spit the food out of my mouth. He was that Shane Walsh?! I let out a chuckle of disbelief, setting my plate aside once again and standing up when Shane stood. I wrapped my arms around his large torso and he practically engulfed me into a hug. How could I forget that nose? Damn, he changed so much.

"My god, you've gotten uglier." I chuckled, pulling from the hug, "I should've recognized that nose."

He chuckled and shrugged, brushing his fingers through his black locks. "You changed... completely. I barely recognized you." He smiled.

"Barely? You had no idea who I was!" I laughed. It was obvious Lori was confused by her face, but she smiled nonetheless. "Wow, it's been so long..." I sat back down and took a bite of my food again. "Where's that little friend of yours that was always tailing behind you? What was his name?"

     I could tell I hit a soft spot, just by the way Shane's smile faltered and he scratched the back of his head. "Uh.. Rick Grimes," he began and cleared his throat, "he ain't make it..."

"Oh..." was all I could manage and swallowed the food in my mouth, "I'm so sorry. I didn't-"

     "You didn't know, it's alright." Lori jutted in, a weak smile on her thin lips.

"Was he your husband or something?" I asked, almost hesitantly as I scooped the last bit of fish into my mouth.

"Yes, he was. I have a son, too. You'll meet him later on if you'd be happy to stay..." she began, taking my discarded plate. Probably to rinse off later. "It's safe here... we have food, and an extra space in the RV with Dale if you'll stay.."

Stay? She wants me to stay? A complete stranger. I guess she felt safe enough knowing I knew Shane at one point. I licked my lips and tapped my foot, deep in thought. It was silent between us. Maybe I could stay with them just for a few days. I need to get to Atlanta. I looked back up at the two, shrugging my shoulders.

"I'll stay, but only for a few days. I'm heading to Atlanta to the refugee center." I said, and Shane's face contorted into somewhat of a grimace.

"That thing? Never happened. Atlanta belongs to the dead now, lil lady. We just sent a group out there a few days ago to get supplies. No tellin' when they'll be back." He sighed and looked at the ground, then back up at me.

"You're kidding." I groaned with desperation. "That was my only shot!"

"Well. See this as an opportunity. You ran into us for a reason, y/n." Lori's gentle voice cooed in an attempt to calm me down, "you stay with us, you'll be safe. This group will welcome you with open arms."

I signed softly and rubbed my face with my hands, looking straight at the ground. What other choice do I have? It's not like I can find another group as polite as these guys. Let alone another group with someone I know, unless you can bring people back from the dead. Oops. Too soon? With the look on my face, the two already knew my answer and Shane motioned around.

"Welcome home." He joked, a grin spreading onto his face. Lori on the other hand, was not so pleased with his little joke, and slapped his arm. "Come on, sweetheart. Let's get you a place to rest. You must be exhausted." She cooed, "you can meet everyone in the morning."

Speaking of exhausted, I couldn't stop the little yawn coming from my lips. I stood by Lori's side and began trailing behind her. We walked towards a large RV parked right in the middle of the camp, Lori giving the door a few hard knocks. On the third knock, a rather older looking man opened the door and gazed down at us.

"Who's this?" He asked, a smile on his face.

"This is y/n. She needs a place to rest for the night, do you have space in the RV?" She almost pleaded.

"Of course. The couch is open. It ain't the most comfortable, but it's a good place to sleep. Name's Dale. Come on in, sweetheart." He stepped aside and motioned me in.

I gave Lori a thankful smile and followed Dale into the RV. It was a cozy little place, with decorations all over the walls. Dale carefully stepped past me and fluffed the pillows on the couch, moving to dig through a small storage closet. He pulled out a small blanket, gently placing it in my hands. I gave him a look of curiosity and gently took the blanket.

"It gets cold at night." Was all I needed to hear. "Welcome to the group, Y/n."

Well. Welcome to the group, Y/n.