(AN- Depiction of self harm and discussion of heavy topics..)

Chitrasen stared at the door with his mouth agape... Did his Guru call his sweet twin brothers demons? Chitra sighed.. He heard his stomach grumble.. He called his horse and set out to find something to eat.. It was getting late and there was no shop open..

Chitra sat at the banks of Ganga river.. He wanted to cry at this point.. He heard his horse neigh.. Just than an idea struck him.. He saw his horse eating some grass..At first it seemed gross.. He plucked two and gulped it in one go.. He immediately coughed it out, and used water to get rid of the soil taste..

Chitrasen couldn't hold it back anymore and broke down.. His tears slipped down his eyes and fell in Ganga river.. Why was his childhood so rough? At this point he wondered how did karna endure it.. He slowly wiped his tears and returned to his gurukul.. The lights were off and the wind blew slowly... He tied his horse and went in... The next few days were rough...

He barely got to eat, he couldn't focus during meditating.. But his sword skills were still the best.. Dronacharya was happy with his performance but still made sure that he felt different.. One such day...

Chitra was going back to his room, he saw his door was open and he heard some mumbling.. He narrowed his eyes and blocked the entrance.. There stood three of his sworn enemies.. The Sauvira kingdom prince envied Chitrasen because of his great sword skills.. The last time they had an official match, Sauraj lost badly.. He felt embarrassed..
He wanted to take his revenge..

Chitrasen's eyes widened when he saw Sauraj hold his wooden art peice.. It was given to him by Vrushali.. It was very close to heart..

Chitrasen-" What are you doing in my room?"
Sauraj-" Nothing much.. Just came to check in, how a suta lives! Oh how disgusting, you guys use such things?"

Saying so he laughed and tossed the wooden piece in air and caught it.. Chitra felt angry.. He took a step forward and said in cold manner...

Chitrasen-" Give it to me.. NOW!"
Sauraj-" Huh? Why not take it?!"

Saying so he tossed it to his companions, Chitra gave a hard blow to the one standing on his right side, he boy fell on the floor and coughed blood... Sauraj caught the wooden peice, Chitra was too quick for him.. He was about to punch his face, in order to defend himself Sauraj threw the wooden peice. As soon as Chitrasen heard shuttering voice he froze.. The wooden peice was broken!

Sauraj had a smirk, his companions laughed.. Chitrasen's eyes turned red, he turned around and bit his bottom lip.. He gave a punch in stomach and face to Sauraj's partners.. He grabbed Sauraj by his collar and flung him to ground and punched his face.. He continued to do so.. The floor was covered with blood...

Just than Dronacharya entered.. He was horrified to see the condition of the princes... He ordered his other two students to hold Chitrasen.. He immediately checked Sauraj's pulse.. He was breathing.. Drona lost his cool..

Dronacharya-" I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS!ANGA KUMAR CHITRASEN YOU ARE GETTING A PUNISHMENT! YOU WON'T BE ALLOWED IN THE GURUKUL FOR ATLEAST ONE WEEK! GET OUT!"
Chitrasen-" But Gurudev! It was-"
Dronacharya-" OUT!"

Chitrasen scoffed and ran out.. Sauraj had a smirk on his face.. It seemed this was the outcome he wanted.. Chitrasen ran and horse joined him.. He jumped on it and decided to go somewhere, far away from this discrimination... His head was aching.. He abruptly stopped his horse and screamed.. He went near a tree and started punching it...His fists were bleeding and it was afternoon... The sun was burning more than usual..

Maybe even Suryadev was mad at the treatment given to his grandson.. Chitra kept punching he was frustrated... His legs gave up and sunk to the ground.. He sat there and cried for hours.. His horse slowly came near him, and licked his fists..

Chitrasen(thought-" Yes ofcourse.. Even animals are better than humans..")

He sat there, his eyes were red.. His head was heavy and he fell asleep.. His horse kept stroking his head..Chitrasen got up after sometime... He went to the market to get something to eat.. While he was wandering, he saw a suta, who was trying to take control over a very wild horse.. A person in rich garments stood next to him.. He seemed to be a wealthy merchant..

The poor old suta was unable to control the horse, the merchant looked furious and ordered his men to take all the money from his house.. It made Chitra furious.. He immediately stepped in..

Chitrasen-" Mister! Just because your horse wasn't getting in control, it doesn't give you the right to loot this man! Leave him!"
Merchant-" Huh, kid didn't your parents teach you not to interfere when two adults are dealing?"
Chitrasen-" My parents have taught me enough.. It reflects well from my behaviour.. And as for you sir I doubt it."

The merchant was furious, he removed his stick, ready to beat Chitrasen.. Chitra was ready with his dagger.. Just than one of the merchant's friend said..

Merchant 2-" He is the second son of Angraj karna, if we fight with him I fear Maharaj During will give us a serious punishment.. Let's leave.."

The merchant looked at Chitra's determined eyes.. He scoffed..

Merchant-" Huh, lucky kid.. You were born with a golden spoon.. Despite being a suta you will still be addressed as a prince.. I bet you didn't suffer just as much as the other sutas.. Especially during the Suta Movement..Huh you don't deserve, to take the position of someone other prince who was probably going to rule Anga before your father... Why aren't you dead yet? After all you and your father are a stealer! Thieves!"

The merchant was pulled back by his fellow mates.. His words left a deep gash on little Chitrasen.. It crushed his moral.. Chitra heard someone cough behind him.. He turned and helped the old man..

Old suta-" Kumar.. You shouldn't get in fights with such people.. after all we are suta the lowest, we must walk with our heads down... It's not like anyone will remember us after we die.."

The old man shook his head and left.. Chitrasen's eyes widened.. There was too much negativity in the lower castes... He forgot all about the eating while going back.. The images of the event kept flashing in his head.. He came to the same spot as earlier and decided to kill his hunger by sleeping..

It was too late when he got up.. He sat near the banks of Ganga river talking to himself...

Chitrasen-" The conditions...Since than haven't changed at all... The lower caste still has to suffer.. Are we not humans? Just because we were born in a suta family doesn't give the upper caste the right to rule over us.. JUST BECAUSE I BELONG TO A SUTA FAMILY DOESN'T MEAN THAT I WAS WRONG! GURUDEV DIDN'T EVEN HEAR ME OUT? WHY? HOW COULD HE JUST ASSUME THAT THE PRINCE WAS CORRECT? Why is our society this way?"

His breath hitched.. His fists were burning.. He stared in the water and looked at his reflection.. He yelled-" I HATE YOU! YES YOU!" Saying so he threw a stone on his reflection..

Chitrasen picked another sharp stone... He grabbed it and started scratching himself.. There were sharp cuts on his arms.. He didn't stop yet.. He did the same to his thighs... He was bleeding too much.. Just than he heard some footsteps.. He turned around and a worried Ashwatthama... He quickly pulled the stone away from the younger's hand..

Chitrasen's eyes were red from the crying.. His head wasn't in place, he became violent and screamed at Ashwatthama to leave him alone.. He firmly held his hands, and waited for him to calm down..

Ashwatthama-" Chitra.. I know what had happened.. Don't hurt yourself, it wasn't your fault.. Come with me..."

When Chitra was born Ashwatthama took the responsibility to be his god father.. He felt he failed when Chitra started hurting himself. He lifted him and took at his place.. The first thing he did was he fed Chitra with his own hands.. He gave him new clothes..

Chitrasen-" I.. I am sorry.."
Ashwatthama-" Don't be.. It was equally my fault.. I should've paid attention on you.. Now there give me a hug.."

Chitra gave him a warm hug.. After the boy fell asleep.. Ashwatthama immediately bandaged his deep wounds.. He promised that he would make Chitra independent.. For the next one week Ashwatthama taught Chitra some easy cooking..

When he went back to the ashram.. he was more calm and collected.. During lunch and dinner he did cook his own food and it suprised many of them.. Sauraj continued to envy Chitra.. But he decided to drop the topic..

Flashback ends...

The twins stared at each other in silence... Sushen slightly buried his face in his knees..

Chitrasen-" Hey! Woah why this sudden change in atmosphere! Ah geez-"

Suddenly Dvipat and Banasen hugged him.. It suprised him.. He felt some water on his shoulder and he looked around to find Dvipat crying! Sushen couldn't control it and broke down too.. Shatrunjay tried to calm the twins while Vrish did the same for Sushen..

After sometime, when everyone calmed down there was some awkward silence. Just than Shatrunjay remembered those juices and served them to everyone.. Banasen gulped everything in one go and clapped his hands to get everyone's attention..

Banasen-" Jhest bhrata.. I have something to share.. With everyone.."
Vrishasen-" Yes why not!"

Banasen looked at Dvipat, who gave him a nod..

Banasen-" Actually I love someone.."
Vrishasen-" Oh oka-"
Everyone except Dvipat-" WAIT WHAT?!"

Banasen looked down,he was all red.. Vrishasen and Chitrasen tried to act normal.. Shatrunjay and Sushen were really shocked.. Banasen said love he didn't even bother to say like!

Vrishasen-" Uhm well can we know who is it?"
Banasen-" Charumati.. Daughter of Gurudev and kaki Rukmini.."

Shatrunjay and Sushen felt their souls leaving their bodies.. Out of the blue, Chitrasen gave Banasen a comical hug..

Chitrasen-" Oh my.. I am so proud of you baby brother.. It seems just yesterday you were learning to walk and today you are in love!"
Vrishasen(thought-" Are you kidding me?")

Vrishasen and Dvipat sweat dropped.. Shatrunjay-" But when did you both you fall in love.. You are still young.."
Sushen-" Does Mata or Pitashree know about this?"
Vrishasen-" Does she love you too?"

Banasen-" I liked her since I was 7.. Yes mata knows about this.. I don't think she will tell Pitashree about it so soon.. Yes..( shy) she loves me too.."
Everyone expect Dvipat-" SINCE 7?"
Vrishasen-" Chitrasen! What were we doing at 7?"

Chitrasen was too stunned to speak.. Sushen had Shatrunjay were happy that their brother fell for someone whose father is a good friend of theirs..

Chitrasen-" What about you Dvipat? Are you also seeing someone?"
Dvipat-" No jhest.. I don't see myself with anyone at this point.."
Vrishasen-" I see... But when you will be.. Make sure to tell us.."

Shatrunjay nodded.. His smile faded.. Should he have told about Suthanu to Vrishasen when they were having that conversation.. Sushen bit his lower lip, even if his brothers understood him, their was no way karna or the Pandavas would agree for their marriage....

Sushen felt a headache.. He took everyone's leave and went to sleep.. Shatrunjay's eyes saddened.. Vrishasen told his three brothers to continue without him.. Banasen decided to tell Shatrunjay about his childhood incidents with Charu..

Vrishasen went to their wooden hut.. Sushen was sitting down clutching his fists.. Vrish was right, something was bothering him, and that's why he left.

Vrishasen-" Sushen.."

Sushen turned around, he immediately tried to cover up by showing that he was alseep but it was too late.. He sighed.. He gestured him to sit beside him.. Vrisha noticed that Sushen's eyes were slightly teary..

Vrishasen-" Sushen. If something is troubling you. You can always share it too.. If you keep it buried deep inside your heart.. We won't be able to find a solution.. So please speak up! Tell me what is troubling you!"

Sushen looked at him and back at a muddy puddle.. He closed his eyes and said it one breath...

Sushen-" I don't want to marry the Vanga princess...."

[ Next chap is Vrish and Sushen's bonding.. A major hint!- Vatsala receives a letter from an.... injured... Prativindhya! Stay tuned!!]