Demons (Imagine Dragons Cover) // Anthem Lights

Nila

From the minute Luna's car pulls into the driveway, I know my time to cry on my daddy's shoulder and allow myself to be broken is completely over. With my makeup redone after it was made practically nonexistent thanks to my tears, and a literally practiced before the mirror smile on my face, I slip out the door and slide into the passenger's seat.

"Hey, Girl," Luna greets me, grinning as she pulls her little Honda Civic back once more and heads in the direction of the mall. "How's it going?"

"Ya know," I tell her easily, feeling inner disgust wash over me at the ease with which I'm executing an attitude that's such a blatant lie. "I've been procrastinating all day and haven't even started packing, so life as usual for me. How was school?"

"As boring as usual," she sighs, then gets a smirk on her face. "Except for first, obviously."

"Uh-huh, let me guess... non-stop flirting, note-passing, and texting for the entirety of class?" I sigh, and her giggle is all the confirmation I need. "I hate to say this, Nila, but that's kinda elementary school behavior."

"Yeah, but that's what boys do to you, Ni," she says like it's the most obvious explanation ever. "You'll understand when you get a boyfriend for the first time, trust me."

"I'm sure," I quip. "Now are you gonna tell me about yesterday or what?"

She needs no further urging, launching into a minute-by-minute recap of her day spent with Mr. Dream Boat. We're browsing the clearance rack at JC Penny's by the time she's finally finished, and I've discovered that she wasn't as wise as I'd hoped she'd be, but she also wasn't as stupid as I'd feared she would, finding a nice grey area between the two. Apparently, they only spent about fifteen minutes of their day kissing, and that's the extent to which I want to know about those fifteen minutes. It's normal Luna behavior, honestly. He's certainly not the first guy she's made out with.

"That's cute," she comments, in referral to a crop top sweater I pull off of the rack. "But you're gonna make it less cute when you put a cami under it like you always do."

I'm not even gonna deny that that's exactly what I was planning on doing with the shirt. Like, it's just not modest. It's not just a crop top... like one that shows a little skin... it's one that would leave basically everything below my bra bare, and on top of that, it's striped with a sheer material that would show even more skin in an incredibly revealing way. It didn't even cross my mind to wear it without something underneath.

I roll my eyes. "Excuse me for preferring not to have the eyes of 75% of the guys at school on my exposed skin."

"You're hot, Nila, so what?" she returns. "Like, you've got a great body. I don't understand why you always hide it."

I don't understand why she continues to lie to me about it... because my body is a lot of things, but hot and great are not any of them.

"It's not like I walk around in a paper bag, Lun," I sigh. "I just don't want to get objectified."

"Are you sure it has nothing to do with the fact that your dad would never let you out of the house in something like that?" she asks, holding up a preppy-like-her t-shirt as she does. "What do you think?"

"Cute." At least it's modest. "And no, it's not like that. I've never tried to wear something like that, so I can't be sure, but I have a pretty good idea of what my dad would do if I did, and it doesn't involve him immediately ordering back to my room to change."

"Uh-huh. And what exactly would it involve?"

"Probably something like him sitting down with me and telling me that I'm worth so much more than that outfit suggests." It's a struggle to keep my guard up at the thought, which is way too close to the conversations we've been having way too often lately. "He'd tell me that there are things I shouldn't let the world see, because they're reserved for one man, who's going to see those things as precious, just like he sees me. And that would be so sweet that I would start crying and walk back and change without him ever telling me to."

She exhales with a smile, shaking her head. "Sounds like your dad, alright. I just don't get what the big deal about looking hot is."

I open my mouth to respond, but she's talking again before I can, as we move on from that section into the broader area for juniors.

"So, anyway, I want details, and I want them now. What on earth happened with you and Katherine and Zach?"

I sigh heavily. "Right. That. It's kinda a long story."

"We got time, girlfriend," she replies easily, pointing to a displayed shirt. "That is way you."

I follow her gaze and see that she's right... it is majorly my style. But it's short sleeved, too. I use the story as a way to distract her from it before I have to explain why I'm not jumping on it.

"Alright, so basically, yesterday at lunch, Katherine was being Katherine... you know, going off like she always does."

"Right, feeding you the same stupid lines she does every single day."

"Exactly. So she said what she usually did and then she started going off on my dad and Joel, and you know me."

She laughs. "Uh-huh. Little Miss Loyalty. People can whatever the heck they want to about you, but bring someone you love into it, and you lose it."

"Right. So I finally got mad and fought back, and we had a bit of a showdown before I finally just stormed out, you know, cuz I was like totally done dealing with the devil-woman. That's gonna look good."

She nods, draping the article she was looking at over her arm with her other finds.

"So that was lunch, and then we were in English, and I was trying to work on my paper like a normal person, when she starts whispering to Samantha... you know?"

"Right, I know the chick. We've been in school with her for literally ever."

"Yep. So after they're done whispering, looking at me, giggling, and repeating, Katherine slips me a note. What about this?"

It's a thin burgundy hoodie with "Dreamer" written across it.

Luna laughs, singing softly, "To the dreamers, wide-eyed believers, hanging onto hope by a thread."

"To the soul-full, heart-open, hopeful, keep on charging ahead!" I finish, smirking.

"Yeah, it's you, girlfriend," she chuckles, shaking her head.

I add the shirt to my arm before continuing. "So this note tells me that she just told Samantha something. She didn't say what rumor she was spreading, but she made it clear that it wasn't good. And she said that if I didn't meet her out back after school, she was going to tell the entire class... including our teacher, which means my counselor, and you know the mess that would make."

"So basically, she was threatening get a rumor back to your parents, not to mention ruining your rep around the school. That chick is seriously messed up."

"You're telling me," I groan. "So, yeah, I really didn't want that to happen, and honestly I didn't think she could do that much to me, so I went and met her like she told me to."

"Oh my gosh, this!" Luna exclaims, her eyes landing on a rack of different-colored dressy tank tops with choker collars and slim slits cut beneath them. "Tonight. Yes, this is happening."

I follow her over there, and she begins to dig through the different colors, laughing as she turns to look at me.

"Sorry.... Carry on."

"Yeah, so I went back there, and she blackmails me a little more cuz she's screwed up like that, saying that if I told anyone about that meeting, she'd do the same thing... spread bad rumors around the entire school."

I take a deep breath, struggling to stay calm and casual. It's no big deal. It sucked, but it's no big deal. Just play it cool.

"And then she called Zach out from behind the corner, and long story short, she told him to kiss me, and then he ignored my protesting, pinned me against the wall, and did it."

Luna freezes, looking back at me with her eyes wide. "Wait a second, are you serious?"

I shrug. "Luna, you know I wouldn't joke about something like this."

She lets out a long breath, obviously trying to process the information. "Wow, Girl. That's too bad. I know that was pretty important to you."

I shrug once more, trying to stay casual and turning to brush through another rack. "Yeah, it pretty much sucked like little less, but I mean... it's over now, right? It was stupid of me to go back there, but the kiss wasn't my choice."

"Yeah, that's fair," she agrees, looking back to the shirts and pulling out a pale blue one. "Yes?"

I look at it against her skin and hair, and nod in approval. "Definitely."

She moves to a rack of majorly distressed jeans and jean shorts and starts leafing through them, obviously trying to find a pair to go with the shirt. "Wow, though, that girl is a jerk," she says as she does. "I honestly didn't think Zach was that kind of a guy, you know?"

"Yeah, well, that's how it goes, I guess," I sigh, finding a rack of edgy jackets to go through.

"I mean, at least he's hot, right?" she offers.

I glare at her. "Not helping, Lun."

She laughs. "Well sorry. Just stating a fact. So what did you do?"

And now it's decision time. Do I go ahead and tell her that I told my parents, because that's the good Christian thing to do, or do I tell the truth even though it's a really loser thing to do? Like, if they had been empty rumors, I would never have kept the secret. They weren't, but she doesn't know that and hopefully never will, because the mere thought of the disgust on her face if she found out makes me physically sick.

"Well I'm not stupid," I say finally. "I obviously went home and told my mom and dad what happened. Then at youth group, I found out that Legend... you know?"

She nods... she's come with me to plenty of movie and game nights, things that don't compete with her own youth group, so she knows most of the people in mine, at least by name and face.

"He'd seen what happened from a school window. He could tell something horrible was about to happen and knew he couldn't get there in time to stop it, so he took a video so I'd at least have proof against them."

"Wow, that was thinking on his feet," Luna muses as she holds up a pair of shorts with the pockets hanging far past their cut off. "What do you think?"

I just raise an eyebrow, and she rolls her eyes. "I know you think they're too short, but ignore that and just tell me if they're cute or not."

I sigh. "Yeah, they're cute... they're way too cute."

"That's what I want to hear," she quips, and adds them to her collection. "Now go on."

"Right, so then this morning, my dad and I and Joel went in and told the school about it, and they basically slapped Zach and Katherine on their wrists and let them go. I think I got more of a lecture from Asting than they did. But Katherine was still majorly ticked at me, so I'm sure she spent all day making good on her stupid threat."

Luna rolls her eyes. "She sure did. The woman's telling everyone that you cut. Can you believe that? You. Little miss priceless posterchild, and she really thinks we're dumb enough to believe that. Like, that girl is just seriously demented."

"Tell me about it," I reply, feeling a fresh wave of self-hatred wash over me as I struggle to keep my face casual and my tone light. "She tried to pull that on my dad and Joel this morning."

"Oh my lanta, you're kidding me," my best friend groans.

"I wish." I finally pull a jacket off of the rack, and she approves with a brief nod. "Like, I proved her wrong in five seconds flat... that's the dumbest part about it."

"For real," she agrees. "Besides, no one's gonna believe that you're stupid enough to cut up your own arm."

Well, that stings. But she's true... it really is the pinnacle of stupidity, and yet here I am anyway.

Luna keeps talking, which makes things easier for me. The less I have to say, the less of a chance I have to screw up.

"Like, she had this entire pathetic story about how you left crying all over your dad because they found cuts on your arms and blah, blah, blah... hardly anyone was buying it, and those who were have got to be the stupidest people on the face of the planet."

"Well, it's good to hear the entire school isn't buying her lies."

One of the scariest parts about this conversation is that, for the first time that I can remember, I'm the liar and Katherine is the one who's telling the truth.

Time-Skip Sponsored by Strawberry Frappes

We spend another hour or so browsing different stores before we're getting ready to head to checkout at our last stop before she takes me home so she can get ready for her date. Just as we're about to turn away from the final rack, my phone starts to buzz in my pocket. Legend's name is displayed on the call screen. I feel my gut clench. Calling someone on the phone is so not a Legend thing to do.

But I didn't find anything in this store, so I wave Luna towards the register and step outside the shop to take the call.

"Hello?"

His voice on the other line is undeniably nervous. "Um... hey Nila."

"Legend," I reply, keeping it as light as I possibly can. "What's up?"

"Not much," he says hurriedly. "I... uh... I just wanted to call to make sure you were... you were okay."

My stomach tightens once more. The shyest kid I've ever met just called me on the phone to make sure I'm alright. I don't understand how people have convinced themselves that I'm worth caring about like this.

"That's... that's really nice, Dude," I tell him seriously, still desperately fighting to keep my guard up. "I'm good, though. Like, yesterday really, really sucked, but it's over now, right?"

He hesitates a long moment before obviously forcing his next words out of his mouth. "Look, Nila. I... I don't know how to tell you this, and I'm really sorry that it got out like it did, but.... Katherine kind-of told the whole school about... about this morning and what she'd seen before and everything..."

Keep it cool. Keep it casual. Don't freak out.

"Oh, yeah, that," I sigh. "Luna told me what that devil-woman's been telling the entire school. I swear she's lying, though. Like, this morning she tried to tell that to my dad and Joel and it took me all of five seconds to prove her wrong."

There's another moment of silence, another time that I know shy as heck Legend is just getting up the courage to say the next words.

"I also... heard you guys said to each other at lunch. You're... you're not the only one who likes to eat in corners."

I force myself to laugh. "I can't say I'm surprised, Dude. But seriously, I'm sorry you had to hear that. It certainly wasn't my finest moment. I just finally got sick of her and when I get mad, some pretty stupid things come out of my mouth."

"No, it wasn't that, Nila," he counters quietly. "I mean, yeah, I didn't like to hear you agree with her because nothing she said was even close to true, but that wasn't what I was talking about. What I meant was that when she accused you of... you know... that... you totally froze."

"I was pretty shocked she was even trying that, honestly," I tell him easily. "Like, I couldn't believe that was even coming out of her mouth."

"And when you started crying?" he presses evenly.

"I was just... done dealing with her, I guess. Like, I was just sick of having to fight that battle, you know what I mean?"

I hear him exhale slowly on the other end of the line. "Look, Nila," he says at last. "if you don't want to talk about it, I get it. Like, it's really, really hard. It took me a long time and a lot of bad stuff coming out of internalizing everything to finally start talking to Zane about crap that I was dealing with. But we... we're your family here in the youth group, Nila. And we're here for you." He takes a shaky breath. "I'm here for you. Just don't try to do everything by yourself."

I can feel tears threatening the backs of my eyes, but I fight them back with an effort.

"That is really sweet, Legend," I tell him softly. "It means a lot. And I promise I won't. I'm seriously okay right now, but if I'm never not, I'll make sure to call you up. Okay?"

He sighs, but agrees. "Okay. Thanks, Nila."

"Thank you," I reply. "It really does mean a lot. I'm leaving on tour with my dad, but I'll talk to you on Sunday when I facetime y'all for class, right?"

"Yeah, definitely," he confirms, and I make sure to put a smile into my voice.

"Awesome. See you later, Legend."

"See you later, Nila."

And I hang up, just in time to see Luna exiting the store, with another bag added to her collection.

She raises an eyebrow at me. "So... who was that?"

I slide my phone into my pocket and start walking towards the mall exit as I answer. "Just Legend. He was just checking on me after everything that happened yesterday."

Now both of her eyebrows are up, and that smirk I know so well is on her face. "He was just checking on you? NIla Smallbone, don't look me in the face and tell me you think that's normal for guys to do."

I glare at her. "Luna Warren, I know what you're thinking, and it's disgusting. Legend and I are friends."

"Yeah, so why are blushing?"

"Because you're making a huge deal out of absolutely nothing!"

"Come on, just admit it, Ni. I mean, Legend's totally your type, and the kid is seriously attractive."

I groan. "Luna, I didn't want a boyfriend before yesterday. Now? I'd be perfectly happy to become a nun, alright?"

She sighs heavily. "You really aren't any fun sometimes, Nila. But this isn't over. I am shipping y'all so hard. Nigend? Lela? Lila? Negend?"

"Those are all the stupidest things I've heard in my entire life," I tell her bluntly.

She just shoots me a mischievous grin. "Oh don't you worry, girlfriend. I'll find one that works."

I groan once more. "Well isn't that just freaking fantastic?"