Cal

Never before had the song of love been the song of hope breathing its last breath.

Chapter Music: Stay With Me

Mare stares at me from across the room. Her hand still rests on the doorknob, as if she's not sure if it's safe to stay. She's changed. Not from the look of mistrust in her eyes as she glances around the room, looking for a sign that I'm not actually here. No, the mistrust has always been there, rooted deep inside of her. It's been there ever since we took her and made her into a weapon.

What's changed is her. The dark shadows that shape her eyes, the anger in them. The gray that has crawled its way up her hair. What do seven months do to a person, Cameron's words come stinging through my mind.

My eyes find hers and a loose, crooked grin splits across my face, the one she has always loved. "Mare, it's me." I'm stumbling back as she crashes into me, and then we are on the ground. Her hands are in my hair and her breath feels hot against my neck as she whispers, "This isn't real."

"It is, Mare. I'm here, I'm here." I feel her sigh into me and for a moment she stays there in my arms. But, relief never stays long. She pulls away sharply, taking the security with her.

"You can't be here," she says as she climbs to her feet, "There are cameras and if Maven were to take you I-"

"The cameras are down," she blinks down at me in surprise, and I laugh, "Would make for a sloppy rescue if we let Maven know we were here." She grins without any of its usual tightness, but then it fizzles out.

"How did you get in here?" She throws her hand out, letting me grab it to get up.

"This was my home. Nobody knows it as well as I do..." My eyes fall on her exposed wrists, where the sleeves had slid up and now show silver bands. She follows my gaze, and hastily covers them. "Wha-"

"Bands of Silent Stone," she says ever so sharply, "Maven's invention." She looks away. I could feel the stone all around me in this room, as soon as I stepped in here. I didn't expect Maven to keep her like this, under a stone that has killed Silvers before. Under even more stone as soon as she steps away from the prison. Maybe you don't know your brother as much as you'd like, Farley's voice reminds, coming in like a ringing bell.

"Kilorn and Cameron are in the city, ready to meet us so that we can all get out." I blink at her, noting the uneasy tension in the room. You're holding something back.

"Where's Farley?" Her eyes glitter up at me, but her voice shakes as if she is terrified of what I will tell her. Farley has always been like a sister to Mare, even though neither of them would ever admit it. I saw it in Farley's eyes that day when the official report had to be written of Mare's capture. She had to lay out all her cards on the table then, even now Mare is a bittersweet subject around her.

"She's- she's pregnant." It takes her a moment to understand what those words mean. I think she thought I was going to confirm her death. I see the realization spread across her face as she counts out the months in her head, as she sucks in a breath as she realizes whose baby it is. Her brother will live on in the heart of her niece or nephew, and now she knows it too.

"Tell her congratulations," she sounds stiff, and her face stays unnaturally neutral as she looks me up and down.

"You can yourself, once we get Julian." I look at her in time to catch her lips twitch into a frown. "Mare, you are- you are coming with me?" She bites her lip hard.

"That night, on the jet. I left to save you, all of you. What I'm doing here, will require no more sacrifices. No more war."

"What exactly are you doing here?" I say, quirking a brow at her.

"I can't tell you." Her voice wavers, but she stands tall and tilts her chin upward. Forever, stubborn.

"Mare, I'm here now, and we need to leave soon to get Julian. You don't need the weight of an unknown future on your shoulders, please just come back with me."

"What if this future isn't unknown?"

"What in the hell do you mean by that?" I hiss, her eyes hardening in response.

"I've talked to Jon, and he has told me what the future will be. It will be better than the one we have now. But to make that happen, I can't leave with you."

I feel the heat in my cheeks as I shake my head, "No. You can't trust him. He speaks in riddles. He's the reason you're brother is dead, and if you don't turn your ear away from him you could follow him!"

"He is also the reason that I am not," she hisses, "He saved me once already."

"You think you can read anyone's intentions, don't you?" I say, matching her fire. "If you're so good at it why couldn't you tell Maven was betraying you before he revealed his game? What Jon is telling you is just words, and they lie all the time."

If not for the silent stone, I imagine the lights would have shattered the second I mention Maven's betrayal. The wound it left still gapes open, still picking up dirt and spitting with infection. We both lost things we loved that day.

"You left me here for nearly six months to rot, not a word from you, or Farley, or anyone." she says cooly, "Only Julian showed he remembered I existed at all. Then you show up, as if breaking in here wasn't a challenge at all."

"We weren't able to before. To get here I had help from Montfort, a country where there is blood equality. We didn't have their resources before. Mare, I've spent every day trying to get back to you," I'm desperate now, and I can hear it in my voice. I know Mare can too.

"Don't," she says, stepping away. "Don't try to make up excuses for the time." I walk to her, my boots thundering on the floor and take her face in my hands. She doesn't look like the broken girl I met outside of a bar, trying to pickpocket a coin out of my coat. She looks more ruined now.

"Come back with me, Mare. Come back to your family. I would never lie to you, Mare. I would never hurt you," I breathe out, meaning every word.

"I've heard those words before," she says numbly as she pulls out of my hold. I see the life leave her beautiful, stormy eyes-- even if she is not dead. "I will give you a small piece to the puzzle, Cal. I am going to take what you have always loved the most-- loved even more than me." Her voice is cold, and her stare is deadly. "When I have it and you see what the future looks like, you won't look at me like you are right now. You will see that I was right, and I hope that then you will join me."

"Mare, don't do this-"

"Leave," she demands, her red-stained lips glistening in the light of the fire, "Leave Julian. You will walk away empty-handed from this place and watch from afar as I rise. Never will another Red have to march away onto a battlefield for a Silver's gain. You'll see, Cal. You will only have yourself to blame for not understanding sooner." She turns away, her gown dragging behind her, and walks to the window— dismissing me as if I was no one at all.

"What's happened to you?"

"Nothing you can change," she rattles, watching as a strike of lightning erupts across the sky. It's begun to storm, turning the evening sun into a swirling pit of black. It's a cruel reminder of what has been ripped from her under the draining weight of the stone.

I stare at her head, hoping that she'll turn around, that she'll come with me and show me where Julian is being held. That she'll forgive me for the way I looked at her— as if she was just like him, leaving me and our memories for power. I could never believe that. 

But she doesn't turn around, and I leave alone in the secret passageways to the underground tunnels before anyone else notices I was there at all.