Brianna

I keep my head down, my arms crossed over my body, as I walk as fast as I can from the school. I'm almost there. Just a few more yards, and I'm safe.

I make it out the doors, and breath a silent sigh of relief. I just couldn't take any more of them today. Since yesterday when Jason found out, everything has only gotten worse here.

"Hey, Bloody, come over here, will you?"

I half-panic as I recognize Lincoln's voice.

I look up to see him, Brandon, Trevor, Lisa, and Tyla, lounging on the rocks that decorate the front area of the school.

I swear under my breath and keep walking, looking down once more

"Hey, are you deaf?" Brandon snaps. "He said get over here!"

I keep walking.

And a hard shove from the side they're not on sends me stumbling closer to them.

"You little punk, do as he says!" I look up in panic to see Ken, also known as the king of the school, sneering at me.

Since when did he even know I existed?

I try to edge away from him, but I feel another hand clamp around my arm, swing that way, and see Lincoln. I'm dead.

"You are a rebellious little loser, aren't you?" he snaps, and raises a hand to Ken. "Thanks, my man."

"Anytime," he replies like it was normal favor. "Just punsh the little punk good and tell me about it."

And Lincoln drags me over to the rocks.

"So, Bloody," he says with a fake smile. "We need to talk about this little celebrity business on Tuesday."

I bite my lip. "Can you please just let me go?"

"Come on, girl, we're curious," Tyla says in a sickly-sweet way. "How'd you meet him?"

I don't answer.

"Well, that's just rude," Lisa complains. "You get in with someone awesome like that, and you won't even tell us about it?"

"I don't wanna talk about it," I whisper.

"Wait... he doesn't like you, does he?" Trevor asks, excitement in his voice. "He just did it 'cause of speak life and all that junk, right? Dude, he must think you're such a loser."

I bite back tears. Yeah, he must.

"That must suck," Lincoln taunts. "You finally meet your idol, and he hates you that much? Wow. Your life really just isn't worth living."

"No, it's not," I whisper. "Now can I go?"

"Wait, what was that?" Brandon gloats. "Dude, we better get a counselor. Bloody's suicidal."

Why do I have to be so stupid?

"Just shut up and go away!" I mutter, though I know it's in vain.

"We better not, you might kill yourself," Lincolns says, smiling in an antagonizing way. "We just couldn't let that happen."

"Yeah, really," Lisa agrees. "I seriously have to go get you some help. I'll be right back."

I feel panic threaten to overwhelm me, and I open my mouth to stop her, but she's run off before I can.

I squeeze my eyes shut against tears of utter despair.

"Please don't," I whisper, though I know it won't do any good.

Lincoln turns back to me, grinning.

"So, another question, what on earth did you do to your face? I mean, you were ugly to begin with, but with that?" He shakes his head. "It's just awful."

I stay silent, desperately fighting my tears.

"I think she's fighting, Bro," Brandon puts in to replace my quiet. "Just another area that needs to be addressed."

Lincoln nods thoughtfully. "You know, that's probably it. Wow, Bloody, you're just a loser in every possible way, aren't you?"

Yes, I am. Why do they think I don't know it already? Like the fact that I'm fat, and ugly. The fact that I'm a depressed idiot. Do they think I'm oblivious?

"Alright, what's going on here?" I look up in fear to see the face of one of the school counselors, Ms. Droyer, where she frowns down at us. "Lisa says Brianna was talking about suicide.

Lincoln nods gravely. "Yes, Ma'am. She said herself that her life isn't worth living."

Ms. Droyer's gaze is turned on me. "Is that true?"

I hesitate. How could I be so stupid?

"Well... yes," I admit, swallowing hard. "But I..."

Lincoln cuts me off. "And I'd check her arms too. I wouldn't be surprised if she's cutting again."

The woman nods curtly. "Alright, Brianna, sleeves up."

I squeeze my eyes shut, but the tears come out anyway. Slowly, I take the sleeve of the arm I haven't touched since my attempt and roll it back for her.

"Other one."

I'm dead. But I obey anyway, keeping the top, which has only old scars on it, up.

"Flip it."

Her voice is as emotionless as a rock.

I don't move, but Lincoln turns it for me. The tears just come harder, as I hear Ms. Droyer sigh heavily.

"Brianna Kelly, what are we going to do with you?"

I don't answer. There's nothing I can say.

"Alright, I'm calling your parents," she says drearily.

I thought counselors were actually supposed to help you themselves. Apparently not her. Or maybe just not me.

But I follow her in, like an animal being taken to slaughter.

That's what it'll be like when I face my parents, anyway.

The week passes in a blur of bullying, cutting, getting caught, getting beat, and having the cuts posted to my mother's social media, before the process is started over again.

I slip outside for the Friday lunch period, retreating to the park that I was dancing in when I met Marlee. I just can't take that school anymore. I sink to a seat on a lonely bench, laying my head in my hands and letting out a long sigh. I should just kill myself. Leave right now, and jump off of a bridge.

Why not?

Because I might fail.

But, can things really get much worse?

Seriously, I need to do this. Right now.

I take a deep breath and lift my head from my hands.

And see a familiar figure coming across the grass in front of me.

A wave of panic rushes over me, no matter how many times I've talked to him.

And he just seems to have a knack for showing up when I want to kill myself.

Toby offers me a small smile as he gets closer.

"Hey, Bri."

I stare at the ground. "Hey," I whisper. I hesitate before adding, "How are you here?"

He takes a seat beside me, looking at me carefully as he answers.

"My studio actually isn't far from here, so I walked over on break. I was hoping you'd be on lunch."

"Why?" The question slips from my mouth before I can help it.

I can feel the sadness in his gaze without even looking up at it.

"Because I love you, Bri," he says quietly.

I just shake my head. "There's no way that's true." Again, I just can't help it.

"But it is," he replies simply.

I don't answer this time. I just don't get this.

"What'd you do to your head?" he asks gently after a long moment of silence.

"I hit my head." The lie slides off my tongue like silk.

"Are you sure?" he presses, concern written deep in tone.

"Yeah." But I still can't look him in the eye.

"Okay," he sighs, and I know he still doesn't believe me.

We're quiet for another moment before Toby glances at the school. "What time do you have to go back in there?"

"One," I murmur back. We actually get a pretty long lunch break, from eleven-thirty until then. I think it's something about giving us more time to eat because of our extra physical activities or something.

He nods, checking the time on his phone. "Then I'd say we have plenty of time for me to take you to grab some lunch. Since you're not eating here," he adds gently.

I open my mouth to protest, but he holds up a hand to stop me.

"Come on, for me?"

I hesitate a long moment, before exhaling slowly.

"Okay. I guess."

He smiles, rising as I reluctantly do the same.

"That's my girl."