Art of Letting You Go by Tori Kelly

She listened intently as glass shattered downstairs. Tears ran down her cheeks and her hands shook in her lap.

He screamed in anger before more glass shattered. She flinched in fear, clenching her eyes shut.

This couldn't be happening again! He was doing so well! They were doing so well! What changed?

He found them.

Usually he would never go into her things but he did and what he found made him lose all the progress he had made over the years. Everything gone.

He was back to being the same man he was before.

She felt stupid for leaving it out like that in the open for him to see. Of course he would get angry when he saw it! She had always known that what was in the past was supposed to stay in the past.

After another smash, this one much larger and scarier, she scrambled for the phone, dialing the same one she used to years before. Except now it went straight to voice mail.

She didn't know who to call and she was panicking. Her heart beat was beating out of control, her entire body were racked with tremors, and her thoughts were a mess. When she heard his heavy footsteps on the staircase she knew she had to leave.

And now.

With only her phone in her hand she rushed to her window and pushed it open. It's been years since she last escaped like this and she wasn't sure if the tree branches could hold her weight anymore. But she had to try. Every stair that creaked under his weight was another heart beat she skipped.

Taking a leap of faith she climbed onto the thin branch, quickly crawling to the thick trunk where she could hold on. From there she hurriedly climbed down the trunk until reaching the last branch, cutting her hands along the way from the bark. She grabbed onto it and let her legs drop below her so she was hanging on.

Of course it wasn't strong enough.

The branch snapped sending her to the ground. She landed on her ankle, hissing in pain. But she didn't have time to cry over her injury, he had reached her bedroom and was currently calling her name. It was only a matter of time before he saw the open window and ran through the house to catch her.

She jumped up from the ground and ran across the backyard, climbing up the fence behind the shed so he wouldn't see. If he did than he would meet her on the other street, where she was going.

Landing on her ankle once more sent a wave of screaming pain to go up her leg but she couldn't stop now. She had to get away from him.

Twenty minutes later she had reached the park where she used to always run away to. In the back of her mind she knew that he would find her here, he knew her hiding spot, but right now she just wanted to rest. She sat under a big tree, facing away from the road so he wouldn't see her if he came.

Minutes passed as she let herself recuperate. No amount of breathing exercises could calm down her racing heart.

She pulled out her phone, noticing the blood on her hands. She had to call someone who would understand and at that moment she could only think of one person.

...

It was a week after Keenan saw the scars and Jesse was still being hounded by the Lockharts. It has also been a week of him avoiding them. Well to the best of his abilities.

It was hard at school for the first couple of days because Keenan seemed to be everywhere he was. Eventually he got the idea and kept his distance, but he started to say hi to him in the hallways and invite him over for family dinner.

Jesse declined of course and rolled his eyes at Keenan's greetings. He knew his cousin had felt bad for what happened. Jesse could see it in his eyes. Plus, he missed Claire's hugs not that he would admit it.

So on Wednesday night Keenan dragged Jesse to the hospital for his parents to give him the news. Jesse told Keenan that he was fine, he didn't feel much pain anymore (which was a lie), but a part of him was nervous to hear the news.

If the scars were infected then at the very least he would be given anti biotics and such, but at the very most (which Ben said would be most likely given the severity of them) he would have to have surgery.

"You don't have to be nervous man," Keenan said to him in the doctor's office, his father office actually. "The surgery won't be bad and you get to miss two weeks of school. Sounds fun huh?"

Jesse groaned. "Not when I have to go to school now."

Keenan looked sideways at him. "You know that if you have your absences called out than your grade won't go down right?"

"Of course I know that but-"

"But if your Aunt Stella doesn't call you out because you're recovering from a fucking surgery than my parents will. You don't have to worry Jess."

Jesse hated that Keenan thought he could be protective over him now all of the sudden. Two years of torment and hatred couldn't be made up by playing caretaker.

Ben walked in the door in what Jesse used to call his lab coat. "Hello Jesse," he said cheerily, "how are you doing today?"

Jesse glared up at him while Keenan chuckled under his breath.

His uncle cleared his throat. "Sorry, it's a habit. Well we looked at the blood test results and the X-rays and-"

"Can you just tell me if I need surgery already. I hate being around you," Jesse said angrily. He wasn't in the mood to be around his uncle and cousin any more than he needed to be. He's had enough of them in the past week.

Ben rolled his eyes. "Just like your mother," he grumbled. "Alright well the news isn't good. You will need surgery."

Jesse groaned and leaned his head back, letting it hit the wall behind him. This is not what he needed.

"Come on Jess," Keenan said, poking his elbow, "you have two of the best surgeon's in the state doing the procedure. You'll be fine."

"Why thank you son," Ben said proudly, straightening out his collar.

"Suck up," Jesse muttered under his breath.

"But either way this procedure is very simple," Ben continued, oblivious to Jesse's comment. "We only need to clean out the scars."

"How are you going to do that exactly?"

"We need to cut them open-"

"No, no, no, no way," Jesse shouted, shaking his head profusely. "It's going to hurt like a bitch."

"We'll put you under. You won't feel a thing and when you're healing you can stay with us. We'll help."

Before Jesse could protest Keenan leaned over and said, "Mom probably already decided it. Don't try to argue with her."

Jesse sighed and slumped back into his chair.

...

Half an hour later Keenan turned onto Jesse's street. He noticed the way his cousin's eyes flickered to Aurora's house before focusing again on the road. Jesse simply smirked at him and tried not to let his assumptions get the best of him. But he did have a major assumption, especially because Keenan did the same thing when he picked him up earlier in the day, and had brought her up in conversation three times that day already.

"You should tell Aurora I said hi," Keenan spoke when he stopped the car in front of Jesse's small house. He could barely control his eye roll.

"I've already told you this twice before. I. Don't. Talk. To. Aurora. Anymore."

Keenan sighed and turned to him. "Please," he begged.

Jesse laughed out loud. "You got it bad huh?"

Keenan's pouty lips turned into a thin line. "What do you mean?"

"Never mind," he said, unbuckling his seat belt. Before he opened the car door he turned back to the boy he used to call his best friend. "You don't talk to India anymore do you?"

Keenan sighed dramatically. "Nope; she hates me, looks like we're in the same boat."

"So you wouldn't know anything about her and Kasper would you?" Jesse winced as soon as the words left his mouth. He didn't want to sound so jealous but he's afraid that's exactly what it sounded like.

Keenan's eyebrows furrowed together. "India and Kasper? What am I supposed to know?"

Jesse shrugged. "They're talking a lot now at school. I figured you would have noticed since he's your friend and all."

Keenan clenched the steering wheel in his hands. "He has a crush on her doesn't he?"

Jesse sadly nodded his head.

Keenan pursed his lips together, in thought. "I'll ask him about it. I won't let it get too far."

Jesse looked at him in shock. "Why would you do that? I don't-"

Keenan laughed. "Stop trying to pretend you don't care about India. Let me do this for you bro, I owe you."

Jesse sighed and looked away. "Fine, just be discrete about it," he grumbled. His phone began to ring obnoxiously in his pocket as Keenan snorted.

He pulled his phone out and his heart nearly dropped to his feet when he saw the caller ID. He hastily got out of the car. "Bye," he shouted at Keenan before slamming the door and sprinting to his front door.

As soon as the door closed behind him he answered the call on the last ring.

"Hey," he said, trying to sound casual but failing miserably. He hoped he didn't sound too excited.

"Jesse." The second his name escaped her lips, he knew something was wrong.

"India," he asked, his heart beat speeding up in panic. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

She chocked back a sob before answering. "No. Can I . . . can I come over for a bit? I need to get away."

"Of course, of course. Where are you? Do you need me to pick you up," he asked urgently. He was already yanking his keys off the coffee table and running out the front door. Keenan had already turned the corner and was gone.

"I'm at Palace park, do you know the one?"

"Yeah, I do. I'll be there in five minutes okay?" Jesse jumped in his Jeep and fumbled to put his keys in the ignition. He cursed when he missed it.

"Can you stay on the phone with me," she cried softly.

"Anything," he answered, finally putting the car into reverse and speeding out of the driveway.

"It's dark here Jesse."

His heart broke. "I won't let anything happen to you okay? Just stay on the phone." With one hand on the wheel and other pressing the phone to his ear he sped down the streets of Greenfield. He was going far over the speed limit and he ran two red lights but he'd be damned if he didn't get to her in time.

He could hear her harsh breathing and suddenly a chilling thought came to him. "Are you hurt India? Do you need me to call an ambulance?"

"No," she sobbed, "I'm just scared."

He breathed a sigh of relief. "I won't let anything happen to you." He was one block away from Palace Park so he pressed his gas on the accelerator until he was flooring it. He swerved into the parking lot and slammed his foot on the breaks to stop from crashing into a park bench. "I'm here," he panted, "where are you?"

"I see you. I'm coming over." She hung up the phone but Jesse wasn't patient enough. The fear in her voice . . . he had heard that too many times coming from his Mom. He never wanted to hear it coming from India. So that's why he jumped out of the car and frantically looked around until he could see her. But it was dark out and he couldn't make out a thing.

"Jesse!"

He turned around just in time for two small arms to wrap around his waist. He breathed her in and instantly wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pressing her tight to his chest.

They stayed like for a couple minutes, Jesse rubbing her back and India crying into his chest. That was until she seemed to snap out of it and jumped away.

He was about to ask her what that was for but she talked first. "We have to go, quickly."

He didn't ask her twice and lead her to the passenger side door. He sprinted over to his door and jumped in. His heart was beating out of control and he didn't know what was going on.

Not thinking much of it he reached over and grabbed India's hand, squeezing it reassuringly. She looked at him while wiping away her tears and sniffing back sobs.

Jesse made sure to drive the speed limit home and not break any traffic laws. He didn't want to scare India with his crazy driving.

When he pulled up to his house he was suddenly ashamed of it. His neighborhood was not the type for young pretty girls like India to go into. "Um it's a lot more stable than it looks," he said nervously.

"It's cute," she whispered.

They walked inside and Jesse didn't bother to be quiet, Aunt Stella wasn't home but India looked afraid to even whisper.

"No one's home," he told her, "my aunt works the night shift."

She nodded her head and continued to look around the small entrance hallway. Keenan paid to have the hole in the wall covered up. Aunt Stella didn't even notice.

For the first time he noticed the blood on India's hands. His eyes bulged out of their sockets until he saw the scratches on her palms as well. It was her blood.

"Come with me, I have disinfectant for that." He steered her towards the kitchen and without thinking about it, picked her up and set her on the counter.

She squealed and then laughed in joy. "You didn't have to do that."

He shrugged his shoulders and then turned to the fridge. In all honesty he just wanted to touch her but he wasn't going to tell her that. He reached up on his tip toes and grabbed the box of medical supplies from the top of the refrigerator.

After making her lean over and wash her hands in the sink he began to run the disinfectant over her hands. He thought it was amusing that months before he was doing the same to Aurora but he didn't get tingly sensations in his stomach whenever their skin came in contact. India was different.

"Are you going to ask me what happened," she asked softly.

He looked up from her hands to see her biting her lip and looking up at him through her lashes. He thought she was absolutely stunning.

"I didn't think you wanted me too."

She shrugged one shoulder in response.

He set the towel and bottle down beside her. He reached up and tucked her blonde hair behind her ear. "What happened India?"

She hesitated before answering. "My father ruined ten years of sobriety."

The silence between them was deafening. Jesse knew what it was like to have a drunk for a father. It was no fun.

"Did he hurt you," he seethed, grabbing her injured hands.

She shook her head. "That was from me climbing down a tree." He looked up at her confused until she explained more. "I escaped through my window."

"Escaped? How do you expect me to believe that he didn't hurt you when you use words that like!"

"He would never lay a hand on me Jesse. He's an angry drunk but he's not that angry."

He breathed through his nose. "You have to learn not to trust people like that India. You can't trust anyone not to hurt you."

She pulled her hands from his and jumped off the counter. He knew he said the wrong thing.

"You're right," she said with a cracked voice. "Out of all people, you're right."

"India!" He reached for her as she tried to flee the room.

"No, it's okay. I'll just call Luna again. Maybe she'll pick up this time. I'll stay with her."

"India stop!" Jesse ran in front of her, blocking her way to the front door. "You're staying here tonight alright? I'll take us to school tomorrow. You can sleep in my clothes."

Jesse didn't let her argue. Instead he took her by the hand and pulled her to the basement where his bedroom was. She sat on his bed, looking at the walls covered in posters, while he searched through his closet for a clean shirt and pajama pants.

"Found them," he said victoriously, holding them high above his head. He huffed and crawled out of his closet.

"How long have you had that guitar," India asked, grabbing the pile of clothes from his hand.

Jesse looked over to where she was looking at his Gibson guitar. "Since I was fifteen, my Mom bought it for me that Christmas."

India softly asked, "Do you miss her?"

Jesse's head swiveled in her direction. In a second her face paled and she said, "I'm so sorry. That was inappropriate of me to ask."

Jesse shook his head. "There isn't a day that goes by where I don't think about her."

India picked at the loose hem of his shirt in her hands. "Did you love your father? Even after doing something so terrible to you. . . could you still love him?"

"Not a chance in hell." India's expression broke and she looked down. He grabbed her hand and gently said, "but then again he isn't my real father."

"Do you think parents deserve forgiveness from their children?"

He sat down on the bed beside her, still holding her hand. "Depends on what the parent did."

"Left," she said simply, staring ahead blankly.

Jesse looked at the good girl beside him and realized maybe they weren't so different after all.

"Not only that," he continued for her. "She left you to a horrible life didn't she?"

India sighed. "She didn't know. He wasn't drinking when she was around."

"And my biological father didn't know that my life would turn out like that either I bet," Jesse said, trying to comfort her. "I don't know if our parents deserve forgiveness but I do know that we don't have to depend on them to live. Or be happy."

India looked up at him, her blue eyes wet with unshed tears. He wanted to kiss her, god did he want to do that. But eventually she got off the bed.

"I'm going to go change."

"There's a bathroom up the stairs around the corner."

Once she was gone he groaned and threw himself backward on his bed. How was he supposed to rein in his feelings for her when they had such deep talks all the time?

He took his mind off of it by getting to work on making a bed on the floor for himself.

India came down some time later, drowning in his oversized t-shirt and old pajama pants. She looked at the two blankets and pillow on the floor that Jesse was currently sitting on.

"Are you sleeping there," she asked confused.

"Yeah, I wouldn't be a gentleman if I let you sleep on the floor would I?"

She opened her mouth, ready to say something of which Jesse hoped fell along the lines of asking him to sleep beside her in his bed. Instead her phone rang in her hand.

She looked down at the screen, forgetting about their conversation and hesitantly answering it.

"Luna," she said, instantly making Jesse's stomach drop. Any chance of her even being in the same house as him for the next couple hours just disappeared.

"I'm okay, how are you? . . . Wait are you serious? I thought you hated him . . . Well that's sweet of him." India sat down on the edge of the bed while Jesse watched her in silence. "I take it you forgave him? . . . There's no problem with that," she said, her eyes darting to Jesse quickly. "Well I'm happy for you . . . oh yeah um I called because," she sighed, "well I want to tell you in person tomorrow. But can you do me a favor? . . . Can I borrow some of your clothes tomorrow before school . . . mine are at my house . . . I'm not at my house . . . because I'm at Jesse's."

Jesse tensed up when India pulled the phone away from her ear as Luna yelled into it. She did not sound happy.

"Luna," she groaned, "calm down okay? I'll explain everything in the morning but I'm not giving you his address until I wake up . . . Luna!" Her face turned red and she faced away from Jesse on the bed. "No I'm not going to do that! Don't worry," she whispered. "I'll see you in the morning . . . I love you too."

India set the phone on the bedside table before facing Jesse again, her face still painted a tinge of red.

"What if she knows where I live?"

India rolled her eyes and crawled into his bed, pulling the blankets up around her shoulders. "I doubt she would come get me. She just got back from hooking up with Ajax. She can't judge."

Jesse smiled in amusement when he heard her angry tinted voice. It was cute when she was angry.

"Goodnight Jesse," she murmured.

He took that as his cue to turn off the light switch over his head. "Goodnight India," he said softly.

He could hardly relax knowing she was only feet from him. Their breaths mingled in his bedroom. Every so often one would shift and they could hear the rustle of the blanket in the stillness of the room.

Almost ten minutes later Jesse's phone lit up beside him. He looked at to see he got a text from Keenan.

'Why did Luna Kale just ask me what your address was?'

Jesse chuckled softly before typing his answer. 'So she can come kill me in my sleep'

'Then I guess I won't give it to her'

...