Calvin was at my doorstep at the precise time I told him to. I ushered him inside and introduced him to my parents. My dad made some idle chat with him while my mom pursed her lips and did somewhat a critical analysis of my closest friend in her mind. I should get ready for a long typical mom-interrogation. Hmmm.

Once into privacy, Calvin gave me a questioning look and said," Explanation please." I told him everything and he regained his sweetest expression and said," Oh! I'm so so sorry Ann! I never had an idea....I hope you would forgive me for behaving so cruel with you. How's she now? And you? How did you deal with the shock?" " Gran's doing well. She will be discharged tomorrow. By that, she desperately wants to meet you. Can you come along with me now to the hospital? It won't take long. Or maybe some other day?" I asked. "Right now." Oh God!

We walked to the hospital mainly in silence. I kept thinking about what grandma had said." Tell him,Ann. Life is unpredictable. Tell it before you let life snatch away the opportunity. I should. But could I? No. Seriously I couldn't. Maybe later. I pushed the agenda on my mind for sometime later. For a suitable time. Someday.

When I took him to gran's ward, I saw her reading something. "Gran?" She looked up from her book and said,"Come in dear. Ah! The famous famous famous Calvin. Come here please!" We went in and sat near her. "Gran this is Calvin. Calvin,this is my grandma." Calvin and gran made some polite introductions. I cut them and asked," What are you reading, gran?" "Ah this? This was my favourite book when I was as young as yourselves. I asked your dad to buy me a copy. I wanted to travel up to those beautiful days before I said goodbye. Once and for all." What? Again? Why do I feel as if death is always lurking behind us? I mean, can't I get some sweet family time without that creepy topic? Gran continued," I don't know whether we get books in heaven or hell, wherever I'm destined to reach." "Really? You think there's a heaven? Or hell for that matter? Seriously",I asked. "What do you believe?" Calvin buzzed in," I'm sure she believes there's some scientific place up somewhere, where humans are recycled or whatever. Right, Ann?" I smiled. " Not exactly. I, like every other mortal, have no idea what lies in store for us. But, an oblivion is perhaps the closest thing to what makes sense", I said. "Death doesn't make any sense",said Calvin. " It makes sense alright actually",said gran. "Maybe",Calvin replied."I'll know soon", gran smirked.

After a long while of talking, I thought it was getting late. I wanted to leave but then, I didn't to either. It felt so good to be with gran. I could hardly believe how well gran and Calvin gelled together. But, the ever cruel time! It was always on the tick! We soon started out after tucking gran to sleep.

Once we started walking I said," Calvin, there's something." And I told him that I would leave in about a month. He listened patiently and then said," Right. That's all I needed? Tell me how can life ALWAYS give me lemons? Like I just made a great friend, call yourself my only friend and now you say you are leaving? Wow. That's....okay....I don't get a word tragic enough." I ever so slightly placed my shivering hand on his shoulder and said," I know the feeling just too well. I'll of course miss you and my family beyond words, but there's no turning back from this decision. I'm sorry."

He looked deep into my eyes. Maybe this was the moment I should tell him. I practiced my lines over and over. It came to the tip of my tongue but, they never left my mouth. He broke the silence and said," I'll miss you too. I'll miss my only only only friend." Maybe that was it. His only friend. I dropped the idea and said goodbye.

Later that night, when I went to sleep I thought about what's really after death. That's a question that has tormented me ever since. Like do we just disintegrate into the horizon and we don't know what's happening. Just simple pitch dark black and nothing to feel around? Or was there seriously a mansion up above in the clouds where angles sang and harps played? Or...was there a deep dark monstrous place underground where sinners were boiled in hot broths and whipped? Or was it something all together different that none knew. I would find out one day. But, why can't we know what's ahead of us before we die? Then there won't be all these troublesome thoughts in our heads. Huh! Unfair world with its unfair means.

But one thing was for sure.
I'll soon know the answers to my questions.

Sooner or later.