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"Ehen Funke, I wanted to ask but I forgot how did you manage to even get out of school sef?" We were already at the market and Funke was super excited because this was her first time in a local market and the first time she entered keke, yeah she made me take keke cause she had never been in one before but left for me I would have taken a bike.

"I thought boarders couldn't leave the school compound?" I added. I knew she would be in serious trouble if the school authority found out that she sneaked out of school, Funke was always one for causing trouble but her Dad was always there to clear her mess by bribing the school authority but considering the fact that her Dad's still not aware of her changing schools and Sharon wouldn't be able to do that she would really be in trouble this time.

"Abeg, allow person rest jor, that place is like prison, somebody cannot even go where he likes, see places that I've not been to before and you are talking about school rules and regulations, which dirty rules and regulations make the rules ynash down abeg" She said waving excitedly at a man selling rice, The man had a blank expression on his face as if he to say who is this one?

I shook my head smiling
"Rules are made for your safety Funky" wow that sounds great, how did I ever not think of that?

She shook her head negatively "Rules are made to be broken dear, if there weren't any rules in the first place then they'll be nothing to break then it'll be no fun" she said frowning. "And Funky? Like seriously! When did you start calling me that?" She asked with a grimace.

I grinned congratulating my self for coming up with such a great nickname.

"Funky, don't you like it?" I asked grinning toothily.

"You come up with the worst nicknames ever" she replied with a shudder "Remember the time you started calling me Funkiliscious? She added.

"Yes" I said smiling sheepishly "what do you expect nau, I was still young and naive then, we were about what!... Ten?"

"Eight" she corrected.

Those times were crazy mehn! I remember calling her weird names like Funkelolo and funkesco Hey! Don't give me that look, that was eight year me trying to be cool, You needed to see the look on her face when I called her Funkelolo for the first time she had this weirded out expression on her face and I remember her frowning and sulking all day that she did not like my cool nickname, as unbelievable as it sounds it took me days to come up with that nickname yeah, I admit it, I kinda suck at nicknames.

"Funky, you remember the time I started calling you Funkelolo?" I asked her a smile slowly creeping onto my face

"Yeah" she said with a grimace.

I burst into laughter while stared at me accusingly "It wasn't funny then oh, remember when you called me that in front of my crush when I was trying to be cool? It was like I should crawl into a hole and just die"

My laughter doubled why she scowled at me.

"Stay there and be laughing like mumu under this hot sun, me I want to do quick and get out of here oh! The sun is burning my beautiful skin"

"Beautiful skin ko glorious skin ni, see this one oh! When I am even the one that is supposed to be complaining about my skin"

She glared at me as I burst into another round of laughter, she snatched the list from my hands her face dissolving into a scowl.

"I like my skin like that" he said unfolding the paper.

"You know if you keep frowning like that you might actually become ugly?" I stated matter-of-factly .

"I know sweetie" she said with a sickly sweet smile which was slowly creeping me out, I frowned slightly, what the hell is wrong with her? I had to turn to confirm It was me she was talking to, I blinked, This is definitely not Funke and if it is, she's going nuts.

"You know what? you can go with the frown, suits you better" I said quickly and she smiles.

"Thank you, now to the list! First we are to get rice" she shouted enthusiastically attracting the attention of some grumpy old meat sellers, One especially Frustration was clearly written on his forehead he narrowed his eyes at her and she simpered waving excitedly at him but he simply glared at her and her simper dissolved into a frown.

"Oh! Sorry oh, E be like say this one never chop since morning, no wonder he just dey frown anyhow, or maybe he never get customers sha, That explains his grumpy behavior anyway I wouldn't let him spoil my fun, it's my first time in a local market" she shouted and I shook my head

"Funke in a local market!" She squealed oblivious of the attention and glares she was receiving from some people.

I quietly nudged her at her sides but she pushed me away reaching into her bag to get her phone.

"Hey I'm Funke" She grinned excitedly into the camera while I snorted

"Funke Olorunmola live at the market, I'm your... erm I'm your host or anything they call it" she smiled sheepishly scratching her head "Gosh! this is harder than I thought" she muttered deleting the video.

"Hello and welcome to the program Funke at the market episode one, it's your beautiful host, Funke Olorunmola, I'm currently at a local market with my friend here..." She gestured towards me "Brianna Anthony" She paused the video

"Osinachi say hi to my fans"

"Which fans? Okay the one you left in your room abi?"

"Ossy don't spoil this thing for me oh, at least just wave nau" she pleaded.

I narrowed my eyes at her
"Ossy?" I repeated.

"Yeah, isn't it good" she raised an eyebrow.

"Nah"

"Why!"

"I don't like it"

"What of Nachi? or Sinachi? Nah! That's too long, okay or Sina?" She asked pretending to think.

I visibly cringed "No thank you, I think I'll stick with Ossy" I said quickly

"Kay, say hi to my fans Ossy and they better be a smile on when you do" she warned.

I smiled cheekily with a mock salute "Yes ma'am"

"Good"

She continued the video facing it in my direction "Her name's Osinachi but I prefer calling her Ossy"

I almost scowled and Funke sent me a warning glare

"Hi guys!" I said with fake enthusiasm plastering a big fake smile on my face.

A sigh of relief escaped my mouth when she removed the camera, she kept it lingering on my face purposely for a very long time and my cheek had started to hurt from fake smiling for a long time.

I face palmed when Funke jogged to snap with a woman selling Fish "Oh God! I think this was a very bad idea"

She proceeded to ask questions (which were obviously stupid questions) from a friendly looking Beans seller, you could tell his patience was running thin but Funke was oblivious cause she kept giggling like a five year old and asking silly questions while videoing it.

I sighed deeply before walking up to her and dragging her sorry ass away from the man not without mumbling incoherent apologies, the man waved it off with a smile which made me smile gratefully.

"So guys, she has ruined it okay I guess this is the part we get the foodstuff..." She was cut off when I snatched the phone from her hand and ended the video.

She pouted "but we were just getting to the fun part"

I ignored her walking off to get the first on my list which was predictably rice.

*********

I rubbed my temples groaning in frustration, I seriously think it was a bad idea letting Funke follow me to the market cause her mouth has been running like tap ever since giggling and commenting on everything she saw.

Currently we were walking back home courtesy of Funke who thought it would be great to walk under the scorching sun home.

"Wow, so this is how it feels to walk under the sun without a driver or nanny?" She asked no one in particular as she jumped up and down excitedly.

I nodded anyway

"Don't you think it's high time you went back to school?" I asked worriedly.

"No" she mumbled stubbornly frowning.

"Hey!"

"Fine girl"

"Pssh!"

Some group of boys whistled as we passed by, we quickened our steps trying our best to ignore them.

A tall dark boy with singlet and sagged slim -fitted trousers which did a very good job in showing off his dirty boxers walked or should I say bounced up to us.

He has a smug expression plastered on his face as he approached us, Funke surprisingly stopped and I did too clutching the shopping bags I was holding tightly, He grinned widely his brown crooked teeth on full display.

His smile was kinda repulsive, I looked around warily rubbing my arms nervously.

"How you dey nau!" He asked Funke.

Funke gave him a tight lipped smile "I'm.. fine?"
It came out like a question.

"Erm, I don't know if, erm I can have a word with you?" He asked nervously glancing at me in response I glared at him and started to move away when she gestured for me to stay.

"Okay?"

He proceeded to vomit all the rubbish in his brain which I didn't really care to listen to, I got alarmed when I saw Funke typing in her number in the guy's phone, she sent me a look as if to say she knew what she was doing and I relaxed a bit, the guy must be using jazz to actually get her to fall for him.

He sauntered off a smirk plastered on his face saying something along the lines of "I'll call you"

I turn to Funke narrowing my eyes at her.

"What the hell was that? I mean you just fucking gave him your number" I cried out

"Calm down..."

"I should calm down? Who knows how much information you gave back there considering you gave him your number, your number Funke, For God's sake you could be in danger, what if he's some sort of serial killer or kidnapper?" I word vomited.

"Ossy..." She said amusement evident in her eyes.

"Don't Ossy me! In fact where is that phone, we're breaking the sim now" I made to collect it from he'd but she snatched it out of my reach.

"Ah it hasn't gotten to that! why should I break it?" She asked trying not to laugh.

"Why are you acting so calm? This is a life and death situation" I exclaimed panicking "and you want to laugh?" I stated accusingly.

She bursted into laughter and I narrowed my eyes at her "This is no laughing matter" I stated frankly which caused her to double over.

"Jeez! Ossy, y -you are -you are very funny" she managed to say in between laughter I glared at her and she sobered up.

"But Ossy, you are being over dramatic"

"I'm not! Your life..."

"Might be in danger, I know! I heard you before, but please would you hear me out?"

"But_"

"Just hear me out will you?"

"Okay"

Breathe in, breathe out

I braced myself for the worst

"Okay so he was asking...."

"Spare me the details, straight to the point" I interrupted her.

"Okay, he asked for my number...."

"Then?" I prompted a little bit impatiently.

"I gave him my Dad's number" she said simply.

I stared at her, my eyes wide open with shock, it took a moment for it to sink in, and I did what I did not expect!

I blinked

Then laughed.

Weird I know!

But it's kinda funny isn't it?

But now that I think of it, it wasn't really funny,

My laughter died in my throat and I stared at her with a blank expression

"So all this anxiety? All for nothing!"

It was Funke's turn to laugh

"Yeah for nothing" she said and I glared at her.

"Excuse me sister"

Our heads snapped in his direction with matching glares on our faces.

"What" we asked in unison.

"I -I just wa -wanted to ask what t -the time is?" He stuttered nervously.

"I don't know" Funke answered coldly.

"Oh okay" he said awkwardly and turned to go, I actually pitied him.

"Hey" I called

"Uhm?"

"Four twenty"

He mouthed a thanks in my direction before scurrying off.

"Don't you think you were a little bit hard on him?" I asked Funke immediately he left.

"See plot calling kettle black oh! As if you did not also glare at him, in fact if looks could kill he would have been dead already" she said.

"Yeah, I know! Did you see his face? He looked as if he wanted to wet himself right here, the intensity of our glares was enough to fry plantain"

"Yeah, but that that would have been just Eww" she said scrunching up her face.

Her eyes lit up immediately with excitement "See that phone shop there! I wanna get a new phone" she said tugging towards the shop.

I stopped narrowing my eyes at her "What happened to your phone? I thought you got it just two weeks ago!" I exclaimed "what do you need to phone for?"

"But it's the latest" she pouted.

"How much is it?" I asked curiously

"Just 500k"

My eyes widened in shock
"You want to use phone of 500k? Do you want to use it to call God?"

"Mum sent me the money already, and don't look at me like that, shebi you were using phone of 700k?"

I scratched my head "Erm that was then"

"Well my then is now, me I want a new phone, let's go"

__________________________________________

A/N
Another chapter 😌

*smiles cheekily* I know I haven't updated in a while, I was having problems logging in on wattpad.

Anyways I already fixed that, this chapter was long enough right?

It's not long? Like it's one of the longest chapter I've written 2373 words!

😂😂 if it's not long na you know oh! My hands are aching.

Till next time!

Stay safe!

Why do I feel like I forgot something? Yeah, I remembered
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Bye! Love ya 😘❤💖💗💋