once again, jaemin was in the practice room, rehearsing the 'make a wish' choreography.

once again, he was breathless.

once again, his chest was hurting.

but had he even voiced it out?

once again, he hadn't.

"okay, we're doing better. that's very good." taeyong said once the song ended. "manager-nim told me that we would film the music video soon."

"oh! yes!" hyukei exclaimed loudly, making all the boys flinch.

"but we still need to train, so let's go once again." taeyong precised. "oh, and try singing while dancing. this way you'll get used to it and it will be easier for the concerts."

jaemin gulped hearing this.

he needed to sing and dance at the same time...

how the hell could he do that when he had a hard time just dancing for two minutes straight?

as soon as he would start singing, his voice would break, his breathing would get erratic, and his heart would beat irregularly.

taeyong played the music, leaving no time for jaemin to think about what he could do.

his verse approached as his breathing was getting less and less stable.

and then, he found himself standing in front of the other members, moving to the beat.

he opened his mouth to sing, the only sounds getting out being short breaths.

and here was jaemin, once again, asking himself the same questions.

why him? why now?

💔

"jaemin hyung! jaemin hyung!" chenle yelled, running towards the fragile boy.

"yeah, what is it?"

"are you doing something at the moment?"

"leaning against the kitchen counter while sipping some coffee." jaemin replied bored.

"donghyuck hyung forgot his phone." chenle said, showing an iphone that had a michael jackson wallpaper. "and he left to the 127 dorm. you need to bring it to him before they leave to the studio."

"why me?" jaemin asked, already feeling tired considering how he would need to run to get there in time.

"jisung and renjun left with him, jeno is in the shower, and manager-nim wanted me to film a vlive."

jaemin rolled his eyes, grabbing the phone and heading towards the front door to leave the dream dorm.

"and be quick, they're going to leave soon!"

jaemin sighed, heading out and closing the door behind his back.

he placed a hand onto his chest, ignoring the pain.

"i'm sorry." he mumbled before dashing towards the 127 dorm.

💔

"okay! so if everyone is ready, we're going!" johnny exclaimed, earning nods from the whole group.

a knock on the door made them all furrow their brows.

"i'll open." renjun replied, walking towards the front door.

as soon as renjun opened the door, a heavy weight fell onto him, making him stumble back a bit. he managed to keep his balance, holding onto the person that had fallen.

"hyuck..." a panting jaemin said, leaning completely onto renjun. "your phone..."

donghyuck's eyes lit up as he made his way towards jaemin to pick his phone.

"oh! thanks jaemin!" he smiled.

"you're... welcome..."

renjun helped jaemin standing up correctly again.

"why did you run this fast? you're completely out of breath."

"donghyuck... needed... his phone..."

"yeah, but you shouldn't put yourself in such a situation. it looks like you're on the verge of passing out." renjun told.

"kind of short breath for an idol..." yuta told.

jaemin looked at his feet guiltily.

he could feel his condition getting worse every day.

he felt his heart weakening minute after minute.

he wasn't able to do the things he used to do. they were too exhausting.

"don't listen to him..." renjun tried reassuring jaemin. "anyone would be out of breath after running this quick this far..."

💔

another day had passed, and fortunately, it was sunday, meaning no schedule.

just resting. for a whole day.

well, sundays weren't as reposing as jaemin would have liked considering that jisung and chenle were loud when they were together, and also that they couldn't keep calm for a minute.

"jaem?"

the boy looked up from his phone to find jeno and renjun standing in front of him.

"yeah?"

"are you feeling alright today?"

jaemin nodded, inviting the two boys to sit next to him on the couch.

both renjun and jeno accepted and sat down on each side of jaemin.

"how is your life going?" jeno asked.

jaemin furrowed his brows, not understanding why a boy that lived with him 24/7 would ask him that.

"good, i guess." he replied.

"does the bruise on your chest still hurt?" renjun added.

jaemin mentally sighed.

here he was, about to lie to his friends once again...

of course, his chest hurt.

but the bruise jisung had made was nothing compared to the burning sensation he felt.

"no, it's almost gone." jaemin replied with a smile.

"good. i was scared you would still be hurt." renjun replied. "life seems to be tough for you at the moment. and we didn't want this incident to bring everything downhill."

jaemin looked successfully at the two boys.

why were they asking him all those things?

it was weird.

"huh... what do you mean?" he asked, rather confused.

"nothing. we just want to make sure you're feeling safe and okay." jeno replied, passing an arm around jaemin's shoulders in a brotherly manner.

"yeah. that's out priority." renjun added, leaning against jaemin's side.