jaemin walked out of the room, wiping his tears with the back of his hand.

"what did he say?" renjun asked immediately.

jaemin looked at renjun and jeno, hugging them and crying in their shoulders.

"i... i h-have to d-do a vlive..." jaemin said.

"it's okay..." jeno rubbed jaemin's nape.

"we'll be here with you..." renjun added.

jaemin unconsciously smiled in the middle of his crying session.

he was so lucky to have these two wonderful boys here with him...

💔

jaemin was walking to the 127 dorm with renjun and jeno.

their manager had called him there so that he could film his vlive with him around.

needless to say, jaemin was far from being enchanted to go there.

he could already guess how the other members would be like.

renjun was the one to knock on the dorm's door.

the door opened a few seconds after, revealing 8 of the 127 members.

"hello guys."

"is jaemin alright?"

"are you feeling okay?"

"can we help you with something?"

"how are you?"

the three boys stared at the crowd of worried people with confused faces.

they had all spoke at the exact same time, making it impossible for any of the boys to understand what they wanted to say.

"huh... can we enter?" jeno asked.

the boys all stepped aside, forming a guard of honour for the three boys to pass.

of course, all eyes were on jaemin, making the youngest feel shy and insecure.

"jaemin, come here!" his manager called him from the living room. "the vlive starts in 5 minutes."

the boy walked to the couch where he sat in front of the ipad that they used for vlives.

he made sure to be in the vision field of the camera as his manager sat next to him, but outside of the field.

the 127 members had still their eyes glued to jaemin.

"have a sit here. this way, you'll learn about jaemin's disease." the mnager told, showing the couches and armchairs of the living room. "you'll ask him questions after if you have any."

the manager didn't need to tell this twice; all the boys sat around jaemin, still looking at him.

this felt awful for jaemin.

not only was the boy the centre of attention, but he was also going to speak about something very private in front of thousands of people he didn't know...

"calm down." renjun whispered, brushing jaemin's blonde hair off his face. "take deep breaths, and everything will be alright."

"yeah, and don't worry. we're here with you." jeno added with a bright smile, making his eyes disappear.

"jaemin, get ready." the manager said, pushing renjun and jeno off-screen. "and say what they want to hear. nothing more, nothing less."

jaemin took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a few seconds before opening them and switching the live on.

almost immediately, people started to log in and comments flooded in.

jaemin waited a few seconds before clapping his hands once.

"hello everyone..." he said shyly. "i can read that many of you saw the article about me today... well... i guess you all deserve some explanations..."

jaemin lifted his head, meeting eyes with taeyong who was sitting right in front of him, glaring at him, which made him lower his gaze immediately.

"so... huh... the rumours about me having a heart disease are true." he stated. "i do have coronary heart disease."

he glanced at the comments, not managing to read them since there were too many.

however, he managed to see a dozen of 'what is that?' passing.

"this heart disease occurs when your arteries get kind of... clogged, and so they narrow, meaning that there is less place for blood to go to your heart."

jaemin couched, reading the comments once again.

in fact, he wasn't really reading them. he knew exactly what he was going to say next.

but he needed some time to breathe and to evacuate the pressure.

"it started a few months ago. my chest was hurting like hell, and yeah, i went to the doctor. there, he told me that i was suffering of this disease." jaemin sighed. "it scared me a lot, thinking about how i could need to stop being an idol because of this. but i was willing to continue. i was willing to fight against the disease. and i still am."

jaemin glanced to his side, seeing both jeno and renjun smile at him.

"please, do not worry too much about me. i am taking medicines and making sure i get enough sleep and eat healthily. actually, i already feel my condition getting better, so there is no need to worry."

jaemin tried avoiding to look at the many comments flooding in and asking him random questions about his disease.

"actually, even in the worst parts of my disease, i feel rather good. the members are a big help to me. they're always here to care for me, and make sure i'm not overworking myself. they always are, but now that they know i have a fragile heart, they're even more cautious with me." jaemin spoke with a small smile.

why lying?

because nothing was real.

just like his manager said, he told them what they wanted to hear.

and they wanted to hear that jaemin was feeling good.

plus, jaemin was trying his best to prevent his fans to think that sm entertainment were overworking him while he was in a bad condition.

"end the live." his manager whispered.

"well... here... you know everything about me and my disease..." jaemin told. "i'll keep you informed if the situation evolves. from now on, thank you for coming, and for your love and support. i love you cizennies."

and so, jaemin ended the live, lifting his head a second after to find, once again, all the members looking at him.

and the only question that came out form their mouth was this one:

"why did you hide this from us?"