I drove home smiling the whole way. He had made a choice and he chose me. He really chose me.  When I walked in the front door, my family all looked up and turned their heads. In the sea of sadness that has lived under this roof for days, I must look like a little ball of sunshine.

"Hey, peanut." My Mom said. "I take it the shopping trip went well?"

"It was great." I said, smiling back at her. My smile must have been contagious because it spread across the room to everyone except Anna, who was confused. She was a little slow these days due to the lack of sleep.

"Did everyone just lose their minds or something?" She asked, clearly not getting the mood shift in the room. Kurt was on her hip and pulling at her hair and it looked like she had mashed peas on her shirt. She had a long day. JD took Jessa from my arms and placed her on his chest. I was relieved since she was getting heavier every day.

Jessa raised her head and looked around.

"Where'd my Daddy go?" I couldn't help but smile and blush at the same time.

"Oh, I get it now." Anna said, finally catching on with a smile spreading across her face.

"Mom, you don't mind if Ezra comes over tonight, do you?" I asked her like I was a teenager in high school, asking for a slumber party.

"Of course not. He can help move furniture for tomorrow." My Mom said, smiling.

"He'll want to start in Riley's room." JD said, without thinking about his audience.

"James Davis." My Mom said, smacking him, but she ended up laughing too.

"Not funny." I rolled my eyes. Not the conversation I was planning on having with my family. I really didn't want my family sitting around and talking about the possibility that I might get to have sex for the first time in over three years.

My Mom said something about ordering pizza and we all agreed. She went to grab her phone from her purse to place the order. While we waited for the pizza, Jessa decided she had to play with Kurt. She touched him and talked to him, making him smile every time she got near. He laughed and we all melted. I was surprised at how gentle Jessa was with him. She hadn't been around anyone smaller than her before.

The doorbell rang and JD went to get it. In a few minutes, he came back with a few pizza boxes that were steaming. The smell was heavenly. Jessa danced across the room, singing a new song she just made up about pizza.

A few minutes later, I had some pizza cut up and she was devouring it. When she got her fill, she tried to feed some to baby Kurt who was gabbing back at her in his made-up baby language. I grabbed my own slice and took a bite. I refused to sit down. I was buzzing with excitement, ready to see Ezra again.

About half an hour later, there was another knock at the door. I was practically skipping to the door and threw it open. On the other side was the tall, very sexy, dark-haired man that I had been fantasizing over all night. He had a duffel bag on his back and a hanging bag over his shoulder. I screamed out, unable to control myself and jumped into him, almost knocking him over. He leaned in and wrapped himself around me with his free arm.

JD walked to the door behind me.

"You moving in?" He eyed the duffel bag and hanging bag suspiciously.

"Just for tonight." He said, smiling. He seemed a little nervous, I know JD and Ezra were not on great terms, but it seemed like they were starting to work through it, in a non-vocal way, of course. It kind of reminded me of watching cavemen, one grunted and the other grunted back. Ezra's stance was nervous.

Why did he look so unsure? Was he second guessing this?

I finally noticed how tired and worn down he looked tonight compared to this afternoon at the mall.

"Are you hungry? There's pizza in the kitchen." JD offered.

"Maybe later." He said, turning to look at me.

"Let's take your stuff upstairs." I said turning my head, trying to read his face. "JD, can you keep your niece busy for a while so we can talk?"

JD nodded at me and I grabbed Ezra's free hand and led him upstairs to my room. I pushed the door open and pulled him inside. I took the hanging bag from him and took it to my closet, placing it on the hook on the back of the door. He slung the strap of the duffel bag over his shoulder and laid it on the chair in the corner of the room.

"Are you ok?" I asked him. Troubled Ezra scared me. I had too much experience with his dark moods. He sat on the edge of my bed and ran his hand through his hair and sighed.

"Jenna completely freaked out on me after I left you. She was throwing things at me while I was packing my bags and was threatening to hurt you. She sounded like she meant it, Riley." His jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed.

"I'm sorry, Ezra, I never saw this coming. I hate that you have to go through this." I shut the door and crossed the room to stand in front of him. He didn't move to touch me, so I grabbed the back of his head and pushed it against my stomach. I could feel his warm breath through the fabric of my shirt.

"Riley, you have to be careful. She is not exactly nice and innocent. I met her not long out of rehab at a meeting. She has a lot of scary friends and I've heard some pretty bad stories about her when she uses." He finally moved his hands to my hips and found a patch of bare skin to rub the pads of his thumbs against.

"Ezra, I love you and we will get through this together." He lifted his eyes to mine and I stroked his hair back from his face. He took his thumbs that were tracing my hips and pulled my shirt up a little, exposing my stomach.

I was embarrassed because he hadn't seen much of my skin since I had Jessa. I was nervous that he would see how I had changed since then and not want me the way he used to. I moved my hands down to try to pull my shirt back down to cover myself. He looked at me and raised his eyebrow. A small smile crept to the corner of his mouth.

"When did you get shy?" His eyes stared up at me, amused.

"I'm just nervous." I admitted to him even though I could feel the embarrassment flushing my face. I began to turn my face away to hide from him and he pulled me closer to him by grabbing my waistband.

"Why are you nervous?" He asked and started to try to lift my shirt up again. I smacked his hand back down. "Seriously? Don't tease me."

"I'm not Ezra. I am being completely serious. I had a baby. Things aren't the same as they were three years ago. I'm different." I said, trying to hide my embarrassment. I must be bright red with little blotches covering my skin. "What if it's not the same?"

"Is that what this is about? Riley, you are perfect. Your perfect body gave birth to our daughter. You couldn't be any more beautiful." He said, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Ezra, I'm sorry.  It's just been a really long time since we've been together and I'm just worried I won't be enough for you anymore."  He had been with Jenna for a long time. What if she was able to satisfy him in ways my body couldn't. 

"Riley, who have you been with that has shaken your confidence so much?"  He asked.

I lowered my head again, ashamed at my pathetic answer. He should run from me now.

"Riley, when was the last time you were with someone?" His eyebrow raised.

"The last time we were together." I swallowed, embarrassed by my answer.

"Fuck." He said, palming himself in his jeans.

I looked down and saw him hardening threatening to bust the seams. I felt the arousal stirring in the pit of my stomach and the familiar moisture began to build. Only Ezra could turn my lack of confidence in myself into something desirable.

He lifted my shirt and placed hungry kisses just above my waistband. He wasn't going to let me stop him this time.  My head rolled back from the pleasure of his lips so near my sensitive area. I tried to stifle my moan. He was going to unravel me with just his lips. He pulled me onto him and flipped over on top of me in one motion. His body was sliding against mine while he pressed his hips into me.

He stopped and looked back, remembering we were in a house full of people that included a three-year-old little girl who was bound to come in the room unannounced.

"Did you lock the door?" I shook my head no and he groaned.  He shifted his weight up to move across the room to the lock. He turned it quickly and looked around the room. Finding his bag, he began to move towards it.

"What are you doing?" I asked, confused. I propped myself up on my elbows and turned my head.

"Grabbing a condom." He said, smiling like it was the most natural thing that could come out of his mouth.

"You don't have to." I said, laughing to myself a little.

"I love my daughter, but there is no way I am even close to ready for Jessa number two." He looked at me like I was crazy.

"Ezra, even though I haven't been with anyone, it made sense to get the birth control shot after having her. I'm not ready for another Jessa either." I smiled and bit my lip.

He looked at his bag and back at me, not sure what to do. I could see the panic in him. He did know I was telling the truth, right?

"I wouldn't lie about this. If you feel more comfortable with one, I understand." I said, looking back down at his pants. He noticed how my eyes lingered on him and shifted, rubbing himself.

"I'm going to hell." He said, smiling and moved towards me.