My eyes keep darting to the clock at the wall and my ears refuse to pay attention to the coach. I've been counting every second of every lecture today, trying to keep my mind off of Link's surgery but I won't be able to relax until he's safe and sound. It's just a knee surgery, that's what I keep telling myself.

"But anyway, that's it for today. See you guys on Wednesday," are the words that pull my eyes back to the coach. Finally.

I dropped Link off at the hospital earlier today and told him I would stay at the hospital during his surgery but he told me to go back to campus, knowing how important school is to me. He said there is nothing I can do at the hospital and that it would only make me more anxious. While he is right, I would have liked to be close to by.

I don't know if he is out of surgery yet, if he's awake or asleep, if he's in pain... I don't know anything and it's driving me mad. I hurry back to the locker room to change. Malice didn't show up for class today to add to my stress, however, as I step out of the building I spot her near the exit. So she actually skipped PE today. Classy. 

I don't look for more than a second. I know she will try to fight me if she notices me. When I hear her sniffle, my feet stop against my will. I turn my head back at her. She is sitting on the grass in the shade, leaning against the brick wall with a cigarette in her hand. Mascara is painting her cheeks black and new bruises have colored her thighs. You almost want to feel bad for her but it's Malice. If she's hurting, why doesn't she just leave Ganon? Or go to the police? She is a martial arts fighter, she could defend herself too.

I have to get to the hospital! my head cusses at my legs. They have decided upon themselves to walk over to Malice. Curse my morals. I stop in front of her, looking down without words in my mind. When she looks up at me, she looks just a tad more surprised than annoyed and attempts to clean her cheeks with her palm.

"Fuck off."

I gulp. Why did I walk over here again?

"Are you okay?" I ask her despite her very clear rejection.

"I'm fucking great," she snarls.

"Why'd you skip PE?"

"To enjoy the weather," she sarcastically remarks.

I don't know what to say. I chew on my cheek and roll back and forth on my heels. Why is she so mean to me? I didn't come here to make fun of her. Does she really hate me more than those marks on her legs?

"Why are you still standing there?" She hisses.

"If you tell me to go, I'll go. But--"

"Go."

"But if you're in pain, we can talk about it. Maybe I can help."

"I didn't ask you for help!"

"I know..."

"So stop bothering me!"

"Fine..." I take a step back but remain standing in front of her. There are so many things I want to say but whether those things should or shouldn't be said and heard I am uncertain of.

"Are you trying to piss me off?" She gets up and takes a step toward me. I quickly shake my head. "Just go away before I beat you."

"For someone who gets beat by her boyfriend you are very precipitous when it comes to violence."

"You don't know what the fuck you're talking about," she balls her fists.

"Maybe not. I'm not claiming to know what is going on with you but you shouldn't be with someone who treats you like that." I gesture at her legs. "One day, Ganon might do much worse than bruise you."

"Shut up! Ganon is a good man!" she cries. I sense more than anger behind her voice but I can't put my finger on it.

"I don't know him the way you do, but I do know that he is not a good person."

"Bitch, I'm not going to say it again!"

"I'm leaving," I hold both hands up and turn around. "All I'm saying is... You deserve better."

I don't know how true that is. Malice isn't a model citizen either but unlike Ganon she hasn't hit me or threatened to stab me. She has fought against Impa, but only in an official competition. Besides, Ganon hits girls. What could possibly be worse? Maybe she truly loves him for some unknown reason, but being with a man like him requires giving up any self-respect.

No, that's unfair to say... Not to compare Ganon to Father, but I do understand how difficult it can be to leave someone you care about even if it breaks you to stay with them. I continue thinking about this all the way to the hospital. At least it took away some of the anxiety I felt for Link's surgery.

I park my car in the parking lot and make my way inside to the information desk. My knees feel weak and my stomach empty as the smell of antiseptic fills my nose. I'm nervous, no denying that. It was a minor surgery but if something went wrong to complicate Link's recovery or cause him to lose his scholarship... It would destroy him.

While the nurse checks her computer for Link's room number, I try warming my cold fingers in my palms. "He's already out of his surgery," the nurse says, reading from her monitor. "He's in the post-anesthesia care unit. Take the elevator to the third floor and follow the blue lines to PACU. His room number is 307."

"Thank you so much," I give her a nervous smile and follow her instructions. On the third floor I find Link's room easily and take a cautious look around the corner before stepping inside. A nurse is in the room with him, blocking my view. When she turns around on her way out I see Link's face. His eyes are open, barely. He looks sleepy.

"Hi there, are you his ride home?" The nurse asks as I step into the room.

"Yes," I nod, my eyes dodging back and forth between her and Link. He's lying under the sheets, his leg slightly elevated. He is focusing on his hands as if something tiny was written on them.

"He's still a little out of it. Once the anesthesia has worn off you can take him home."

"Oh, okay. How long will that take?"

"I'd say he'll be ready to go in one hour at the most. I'll be close by to monitor his transition if you have any questions."

"Okay, thank you."

The nurse leaves the room and I am alone with Link. I walk up to his bed and try to understand all the symbols and numbers on the little monitor next to him.

"Hey Link, how are you feeling?" I smile.

"So bright," he whispers in amazement.

"What is bright?" I look at the white lights above, wondering if they are hurting his eyes.

"My hands," he says.

"Your hands are bright?"

"They are on fire. I didn't know they could do that. Did you know they could do that?"

Is he seriously hallucinating? "I didn't know they could do that either."

His eyes finally focus on me and a smile similar to Impa's when she is drunk appears on his face.

"Oh hey babe."

My eyes go wide. Is he still talking to me? He has never called me anything but Zelda or Princess.

"What are you doing here?" he asks while his fingers poke his cheeks.

"I'm here to drive you home, you just had surgery."

"Surgery?" he gapes at me and cups his face in shock. "Did they fix my nose?" His hand searches his face. "Where is it? Is it still there?"

"You still have your nose. They operated on your leg." I can't tell if he's being serious.

"Oh. Okay. I thought maybe they took my nose."

He's so high on anesthesia, it's amusing and a little worrisome too. Maybe I should get the nurse.

"Hey babe?" He looks up at me and tries to reach for my hand but he quickly pulls away. "Oh no. Don't wanna burn you."

"You're not going to burn me."

"I don't know how to turn them off. What if... What if I can never touch you again?" His head falls back in frustration.

"It's okay," I assure him. "Your hands are not on fire."

"Yes they are."

"Well, it won't hurt me."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

"Huh. Can you water my eyes?"

"Excuse me?"

"They're thirsty."

"You want some water?" I see the little paper cup on his nightstand and pick it up. I hold the straw up to his lips and watch as he struggles to sip on it. The anesthesia put him into the state of a toddler. Physically as well as mentally.

"Thanks, babe," he smiles and closes his eyes. My face is turning a deeper shade of red each time he says that word. His eyes fly open again as I put the cup down. "Wait, do we call each other babe?"

"No, this is the first time," I answer honestly.

"Then what do I usually call you?"

"Zelda."

"Zelda?" he ponders. "That's a pretty name."

"Do you know your name?" I ask him. It takes him a few seconds to think about his answer.

"Link?"

"Yes, you're Link. Do you know how tall you are?"

"18."

I have to press my lips together to swallow the laughter that is knocking at my throat. "Do you know where you go to college?"

"I'm in college?" He sounds so surprised. "Am I smart?"

"Yes," I giggle and decide not to tell him about his GPA. "You are smart and even more athletic."

"Do I play sports?"

"Yes, many."

"Woah. Are you a cheerleader?"

"No," I laugh. That one got me.

"Really? You look like a cheerleader. You're eye candy."

The nurse walks in again. I turn my head away and place my cold hands against my burning cheeks, trying to get them back to skin color. Link is not himself right now. This version of him is much more talkative and straightforward. The nurse checks Link's monitor and then uses a stethoscope to listen to his lungs. Link just keeps on looking around the room while she does her job.

"Is it normal that he's a little confused about who I am?" I ask her when she is done with the checkup.

"Yes, that's nothing to worry about. Everything went well during the surgery and once the anesthesia wears off he will be back to normal."

"Okay, I'm sorry, I have never interacted with a patient under the influence of anesthesia."

"No, that's fine," she smiles. "Just make sure he doesn't bend his leg. The brace should prevent that but if he moves around too much he may experience pain."

I nod and she leaves the room again.

"I'm not confused about who you are," Link mumbles, his hand flat against his forehead. "I know who you are. You use my teeth."

This man. What is he talking about now? "I use my own teeth."

"No, you always use mine. I taste it sometimes. Minty."

"Are you talking about your toothpaste?"

"Teethpaste," he nods and swallows. "You sure my nose is still there? I can't feel it."

I boop his nose. "Feel that?"

"No. Maybe you can give me one of your noses?"

"Sure, when we're home."

"Okay, thanks cutie."

I hide my face under my hands and force myself not to show him how overwhelmed I am by his nicknames.

"Cutie pie."

"Link..." I shush him and shake my head with a smile. 

"Why are you calling me that?"

"Because that's your name."

"Wait..." his eyes wander the sheets as his mind goes to stand-by. "What's my name?"

"Link."

"That's my name?"

"Ye--"

"That's a weird name."

"No, it's a beautiful name."

"Baby's better. Or hun," he giggles. "Hun."

I want to facepalm. It's worse than drunk Impa. It's like giving a dog the ability to talk. For 45 minutes Link continues to call me by other names while inspecting his hands and reporting about his war experience from medieval times, which I think springs from one of his video games. He is convinced that he was really there in person and tells me that the whole world depended on him and the princess whose name, you guessed it, was Zelda.

The nurse gives me some documents and a recipe with the prescriptions. I take notes on how often to take how much of which medicine and thank the nurse for her patience after asking two dozen questions. Link is scheduled for follow-up appointments and physical therapy, then we finally leave the hospital. 

On crutches, he follows me back to my car. I open the door for him and help him sit down in the back seat. He is back to normal and the painkillers are wearing off, I can tell by his expression when he tries to put his outstretched leg up on the seats.

"I will give you some medicine when we're back at the house," I say as I start the car.

"Thanks for waiting for me and taking me home," he shares his smile through the mirror.

"Of course. I promised I'd be here."

"I know, but still. Thank you."

"My pleasure. How's your leg?"

"Sore. It stings. A lot."

"I bet. Maybe you can take a nap when you get home."

"Yeah, maybe. Hey, how was PE without me?"

"I don't know, my mind was quite absent." It still is. I keep thinking about his behavior in the recovery room. "You called me babe," I say before I can stop myself. 

My eyes look at him in the mirror when he doesn't say anything. He looks away, his cheeks flushed. I should have just kept my mouth shut. Now the car ride will be awkward.

"I'm sorry," he says, still not looking back at me.

"Don't be. I was just a little startled. You called me other names too." I don't think I could repeat them without turning red myself.

"I, um..." he scratches the back of his head and shyly looks back up at the mirror. "I think... Maybe I called you that because I've been thinking a lot about what you said the other day..."

"When? What did I say?"

"You..." I can tell he doesn't really want to talk about this. "At the party you... You sort of said something..."

Oh no... Now I'm the one minding eye contact.

"You said you have a boyfriend," he mutters.

I was hoping we would just forget I ever said that and never speak of it again. I knew he heard it when I said it but I was almost sure that he didn't think much of it since he never brought it up afterward. Now I know how wrong I was. Why didn't he say something sooner?

Shoot, I have to say something, don't I?

"I..." have no idea what to say. "I didn't... er... I only said that, because..." Why can't he just interrupt me? Why does he have to be so patient with me? I don't know how to finish this sentence. I could really mess this up right now. What if I say the wrong thing and make things weird? We still share a room. I can't breathe.

"W-when you pulled me into the hallway, I... didn't know that it was you," I say, my eyes glued to the road. "I thought it was some intoxicated stranger, trying to get physical. So I said that I have... a boyfriend... to prevent an undesirable situation."

"Right." His voice is impassive. He is giving me no clues as to how to proceed with this conversation. I don't know if it's appropriate to apologize, ask his opinion on the matter, or just stop talking. I'm drawn to all of the above.

"I'm sorry if I made you worry." Worry? That's not the right word! Get a grip, Zelda! "I mean... I don't mean worry, but... You said you've been thinking about it?"

"Yea. I wasn't really sure what it meant."

Me neither. I know we aren't officially together, but he is, in many unofficial ways, my boyfriend... This is going to be the longest car ride of my life!

"We don't have to talk about it," he concludes.

"Maybe we should," I timidly suggest. "It's been on my mind too."

"Really? Like what?"

"We're doing this right now?" I cheep, clutching the steering wheel with stiff arms.

"I don't know?"

"Aren't you still a little hazy from the anesthesia?"

"I don't think so."

"Do you have a nose?"

"Yes?"

"Are your hands on fire?"

He examines his palms. "No."

Did he just check if his hands are on fire? Why is he so cute without trying?

"Guess you're not hazy from the anesthesia any longer," I drop an awkward chuckle.

For the love of Hylia. I'm not ready for this conversation! My heart is already beating faster than I am driving. And we are on the highway. However, I can acknowledge that I will never be ready for this conversation. So now is as good a time as any.

I don't know what to say. I have avoided thinking about this so many times that I never dealt with my feelings for him. Mipha is still part of the equation too. Even though she has agreed to a date with Revali, she is still in love with Link, and as her best friend he should tell her about us before he decides to be with me. Should he decide to be with me. I don't want to hurt Mipha by secretly going any further with this than we already have.

"I guess I just got a little confused about the whole boyfriend thing," Link says before I can finish my inner debate. "I'm going to ask you something... okay? It may sound dumb. I just don't know how else to ask this." I can hear a slight tremble in his voice, making me all the more nervous.

"Okay," I quietly peep and nod.

He hesitates. His eyes find mine in the mirror and he softly asks. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

The breath I inhale gets stuck at the bottom of my lungs and swallowing ceases to function properly. Do I have a boyfriend?

No, of course not. Unless... Unless we have been dating and I just didn't know because I don't know how relationships work. But then he wouldn't be asking me this. Or would he? Perhaps he thinks that I decided he is my boyfriend without consulting him? Or does he think I have a relationship with another guy that I haven't told him about? That makes no sense. But him calling me babe makes no sense either.

It's a yes-no question. It can't be that hard! There is only one answer that makes sense but it could hurt both of us. All I know is that right now he's not under the impression that we are official. Unless he is and thinks I'm not. What? Mouth, speak!

"Er..." Come on, say something, anything! "I d--"

Do, don't, which one is it? I'm so scared of losing him! I am not good at communicating my feelings!

"Zelda... Just be honest?"

I'm shaking. My lips are rigid and dry. My brows furrowed.

"I don't," I answer. 

Hesitantly, I look at him and bite my lip so hard that it bleeds a little. Did I ruin everything? Why isn't he saying anything? 

"Please say something," I beg after no more than five seconds of silence.

"Sorry," he rubs his neck and gives me a small smile. "I'm bad at expressing myself."

"Same..."

"I guess I just had to make sure."

"You did well." What am I saying? Why can't I just act normal? I exhale that breath from earlier and catch his eyes in the mirror again. "But, er... I don't usually kiss my friends."

"Me neither," he replies.

"I mean, I don't ever kiss my friends."

"Neither do I."

"What I'm trying to say is..." Just say it! "Actually, I don't know what I'm saying..."

"I do."

"Hm? What?"

"Zelda, I haven't asked you out because you said you wanted to take things slow."

The swarm of butterflies tries to flutter through every part of my body. He is calm and solemn, meanwhile I feel like I am going to lose my sanity any moment. He has been thinking about asking me out? I'm screaming on the inside!

"I d-did, I do, I'm just... I know what I said," I stutter.

"I'm just not really sure what you want sometimes."

"Neither am I," I admit with a sigh.

"Yeah. And so, sometimes I want to do stuff but I don't know if you want that too. I feel bad because I said you'd set the pace but most of the time I'm the one to push it. I just don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"You don't. You haven't done anything that made me uncomfortable, I promise. I'm the one who suddenly moved in and took over your room."

"I'm not really talking about that."

"I--I know. I'm sorry. I know that's not what you meant. Just don't feel bad, please. I enjoy your company. At all times. You make me ecstatic... I'm very happy and very comfortable when I'm around you."

"Same to you," he smiles, causing me to smile too.

"I've never been this close to anyone, you know that, right?"

"You told me that you've never kissed anyone before."

"Yes. But everything else too... I've never even had a guy friend. Let alone slept in the bed of one and cuddled with one... Or held hands with one, or went on a date. I've never done anything like this and half the time I don't know what I'm doing. Making the first step is scary to me. I don't think I'm ready to make any decisions like that."

"It's scary to me too."

"Are you serious?"

"Of course... Making the first step is always scary. But I can't help it sometimes. Also... I kinda caught on to what you're saying. I know that we are more than friends."

There it is. I knew it. I blush and bite down on my teeth to keep that ridiculous grin under control. 

"But when you said that you have a boyfriend I wasn't sure if I saw us that way. You still want to keep everything a secret and I get that but it's hard sometimes. I want to kiss you at school. Classes with you are torture. I feel like I'm not even allowed to look at you. Ever since you moved in it's just so hard not to act like your boyfriend. I know saying that you have a boyfriend was a heed-of-the-moment thing to protect yourself but it really got me thinking. If you don't see me that way I don't if I can just stop acting like it."

"I don't want you to stop," I quickly say. And I do see him as my boyfriend but I don't know how to put that into words without making a fool of myself.

I feel every emotion, from love and happiness to nervousness and fear, all the way to the tiny thorn of anger I feel toward Father and Mipha for standing in the way of this. Ultimately it is me though who stands in the way of it all. Is it selfish of me or selfless to hold back?

This is what Pik was talking about last week. He did something selfless that I took as selfish. Deciding to keep this a secret is selfless in a way that will protect Link and Mipha, but selfish because it also hurts them. It is a vicious circle.

"I don't know what to do," I speak my thoughts. "I wish I did but I don't."

"What do you want to do?" he asks instead.

"I don't know. I'm sorry."

"Hm... Do you want to stay with me for a little longer?"

"You mean live at your house?"

"Um..." his eyes flee to the window. "Yes."

"Or are you asking if I still want to be with you."

"That."

"I still want to be with you, of course. I just don't know what to do next. And I'm sorry if I'm being awkward. I just don't know what to say or do but I do want to be with you so badly and I think I'm painfully repeating myself right now please stop me."

He chuckles. "I think we're both a bit stranded here."

"It sure seems that way," I giggle. "It's good that we're talking though. You wouldn't believe how much I've been thinking about you and the direction this is heading."

"Which is?"

"Er--"

"I'm kidding. You don't have to say it."

"Thank you," I sigh. We both know this is going to end in one of two ways. We either become a couple or we don't.

"Until you know what you want, nothing has to change," he says.

I thought I knew what I wanted but now that it is in reach, I am too scared to grab it. I like what we have and I am terrified of change. Link confessing that he has been thinking about asking me out was enough to confirm that he likes me the way I hoped he would. It took away my biggest concern. He did basically say that I am the issue here, but he is also patiently waiting for me to make up my mind. 

I just worry about the actions Father might take or the way Malice and Ganon could exploit this situation. Or maybe I am just making up excuses for no reason... I don't know! I need time to think.

"Have you talked to Mipha yet?" I ask, hoping it won't give away her feelings for him.

"About us? No, why? Is that what's going to change your mind?"

"My mind doesn't need changing... I like you, Link." More than you know. "And I do see us as more than just friends."

"Oh," his cheeks turn to a deep crimson.

"I just can't make any grand decisions when my life is still a hot mess. I only recently left my father and my home, I'm struggling to keep my grades up, and there is just so much going on at the moment. I don't want to jump into something and mess it up because my mind is all over the place. You've become my best friend in such a short time and I am so scared of messing it up and losing you. I need to figure out my life first. I want everything else to be okay so I can give you everything you deserve. I hope you can understand that."

He nods. "Okay, sure. Sorry."

"Don't apologize. I'm really glad we talked. Even if I don't know what to say, I know how I feel."

He frowns with creased brows. I messed it up, didn't I...

"Did I say something wrong?" I ask nervously.

"No, not at all," he winces, "I'm really happy that you know how you feel about me and obviously same to you. I'm just in a lot of pain. But I'm happy."

"We're almost home," I tell him worried. I don't like seeing him in pain. "You'll take some medicine and we can take a nap together."

"Thanks, babe." In midst of his pain he manages to let out a short laugh.

"Goofball."

"Sowwy. But for real, I understand what you're saying. I'll wait. You're like my best friend too and I really mean it when I say we'll go your pace. No worries."

---

(Hey guys! Hope everyone's week is good so far! Last chapter was sort of like a beach episode that didn't really contribute much to the plot but it was a lot of fun to write and I'm glad you guys liked it! I saw a few people pointing out that Majora and Cia were sexually assaulting Revali and it's important that you caught that because it doesn't matter if you're male or female; if it's against your will then it's wrong. Period. I'm glad that it's spreading some awareness. I love how mature my readers are and how much support you give to each other and to me too. I love you guys soooo much!! xoxo Ace)