SEAN

"Fuck," I hissed to myself, keeping my eyes downcast. Everyone had left the beach to watch the races which benefited me at the present moment. I didn't have to fear someone walking in on her naked as the fucking day she was born.

So far, I experienced what it felt like to be with Rose on her good days but I was about to find out how to handle her on the bad days. I knew what I should be doing and that was definitely not letting her into that water but if I took her home they would fuss over her. As much as they cared about her, smothering her only pissed her off, and in her volatile state pissing her off would lead to something I probably couldn't handle.

I needed to reduce her energy in a calming manner but with alcohol in her system, that would be difficult. Fuck, I was seriously beginning to regret tonight. Bringing my gaze up, I found Rose with her back to me, head back as she stared at the stars lighting up the sky. More than half her body was immersed in water, her wet hair cascading heavily down her back.

Removing my shirt, I tossed it on top of the pile of clothes Rose had left. Then did the same with my jeans. To keep on the safe side, I kept my boxer briefs on. As much as I'd love for something more to happen tonight, it wasn't in her best interest. And if it wasn't in her best interest, then I wasn't going to do it. My brother thought I wouldn't be able to handle her and I needed to prove him wrong. Not just for myself, but for her too.

I cursed under my breath when I entered the water. It was cold but it didn't take me too long to adjust. Making my way to her, I circled my arms around the curve of her waist from behind and drew her into me, "You're trouble, Rose," I murmured, dipping my head into the crook of her neck.

"And you love it," she taunted in her sweet voice, giggling when I glided my fingers across her stomach, "don't the stars look beautiful? I wish we could see them like this in New York. Do you think I'll be seeing you in New York?" She turned in my hold, throwing her arms over my shoulders, "Will this all be over after the summer, or is this the real thing? I mean, am I really making the right decision choosing you?"

I pressed my lips to hers before she could get another mouthful of words out. She sighed into me, body relaxing as my lips moved in sync with her's. It had every fucking nerve in my body screaming for more, begging me to give in. However, as much as I needed to go at her pace, I needed to realize what would be best for her at the moment.

Pulling away, I whispered against her now swollen lips, "You need to calm down. Don't let those racing thoughts get the best of you."

"Are you mad at me?" She asked, pulling the corner of her bottom lip between her teeth.

"I'm not mad," I shook my head, pulling her closer to me and then instantly regretting it when she locked her legs around me and pressed her heated core to my already throbbing hard-on. Looking up to the heavens, I muttered, "Lord, give me strength."

She giggled again, pulling away from me and swimming toward shore, "Race you!" Rose chortled, moving quickly through the water.

"But we just got in!" I groaned, swimming after her. She had elevated levels of energy that I wasn't certain I could keep up with.

I was fucking lazy.

It made me wonder how my brother dealt with it but then again, he never truly handled her. There were times she would go missing and turn up the next morning. My aim was for her to not leave my side until I took her home safely, and even then, I would be with her.

She ran up to where our pile of clothes sat, slipping into her dress and tossing me her bra, "Keep it, the damn thing is too uncomfortable to wear," I held in a groan when she began massaging her nipples.

"Probably shouldn't have put the piercings then," I mumbled, looking at her with a grin splitting my lips.

"You love the piercings," she reciprocated my grin, watching me pull on my jeans and tee. Grabbing the shoes she wore in one hand, she began pulling me down the beach with the other, "come on, slowpoke."

Fumbling on my feet, I grabbed my sneakers and followed her with our hands interlaced, "I'm coming, I'm coming," I chuckled but deep down I was worried about her. It wasn't the manic that scared me. It was what would happen when this finally wore off. Coming down from such a high sometimes led to an immediate low.

I strode beside her as she skipped along the shore. The race was now forgotten and so was sitting by the bonfire or swimming. But that was the thing. When it came to mania, she had the attention span of someone suffering from ADHD. She couldn't focus on just one thing long enough.

"I've always wanted to come back here to settle down one day. This is my home," she voiced, inhaling the salty air deeply, "what do you want to do?"

My lips twitched into a smile, "I want to be wherever you are," as much as I said that because I didn't want her getting mad, I actually meant it.

"You're willing to put up with me?" She laughed, cutting me a glare filled with amusement.

I stopped, dropped my sneakers, and cupped the side of her neck. She shuddered at the feeling of my thumb tracing her jaw, looking up at me with expectant blue eyes, "I'm willing to be with you. All of you. The good and the bad."

Within a blink of an eye, her lips captured mine and her body slammed into me with enough forced to topple me over. This kiss wasn't like before. This was frantic and full of need and desire. As much as my body was telling me yes, my brain kept saying no and I was inclined to follow my brain.

She straddled me, laughing hysterically between kisses. Her simple touch could set my body alight and she knew that. That was why she wasted no time in letting her hands travel up my shirt, gingerly caressing the lines my muscles carved.

Rose slid her tongue over my bottom lip, rocking her hips against me as she did so. With a groan of both frustration and lust, I gripped her hips in an attempt to stop her. I didn't want to add too much force, fearing I'd hurt her.

"Princess, I need you to stop," I breathed just as she began peppering kisses along my jawline. If she was any other girl and this was any other time I would have gladly given her what she wanted.

But Rose wasn't just any other girl.

"Sean," she cooed, her hot breath hitting the side of my face and sending literal shivers down my God damn spine, "I just want to have a little fun." She began undoing my jeans, nipping at my earlobe as she did so.

I caught her hands, holding them behind her back as I sternly said, "No, not here, not now." I knew that would piss her off but what other choice did I have, "I'm not going to fuck you here because you're better than that."

She grunted, muttering something to herself before struggling out of my hold, "I really am not so if you're not going to fuck me then I'll find someone who will."

In a single movement, I switched our positions so that I was now on top of her, her arms pinned above her head, "Don't you try that shit with me, Rose. Only I get to fuck you."

"And right now you're being all-talk, buddy," her response was laced with sarcasm, "let me go."

"Not a chance," I growled, narrowing my eyes into slits, "You want to fuck but let's be honest, you're not going to get much satisfaction out of it when you're like this."

Her blue orbs rolled, "Don't be such a killjoy. You and your brother are exactly the same." She was getting feisty because she wasn't getting what she wanted. I knew I shouldn't be taking anything that left her lips to heart but I couldn't help it.

Was this the entire reason my brother never made his move?

"You asked my brother to fuck you?" It was stupid of me to ask the question but right now, I needed to hear the answer because maybe Dean was right. Maybe I was another one of her impulsive decisions. She didn't realize I had spoken to my brother already and had already heard what he thought of us being together.

"Multiple times," she grinned wickedly, "always came back with the same answer though. I must not be attractive enough for you brothers. All you both do is look at me like a broken toy that needs fixing."

"You know that's not true."

"Isn't it," She grimaced, wriggling beneath me. I clenched my molars as the friction caused my cock to harden again, "or am I just too messed up for you both to fuck?"

"It's not just about sex, Rose, and you know it," I chastised.

"You're right, it's not. You two already use me like a rag doll, trying to make me choose between you both. Might as well have each of you pulling at either of my arms," as much as I knew she didn't mean the words she spoke, there was truth behind them.

I got to my feet, guilt settling into my bones as I released her, "I'm taking you home," I kept my face stoic so she wouldn't see the pang of pain squeezing my heart, "please don't fight me."

"Too bad," she gritted, standing to her feet and dusting her dress free from the sand grains, "I don't want to go home."

She turned on the balls of her feet to leave but I couldn't have that. I was responsible for her and if I let anything happen to her, I'd never forgive myself. So, I pulled her by her arm causing her back to slam against my chest. To prevent her from letting a gut-wrenching scream rip through the air, I cupped a hand over her mouth. I didn't want to be this rough with her but if she kept fighting me, I would have no choice.

"I will toss you over my fucking shoulder, kicking and screaming if I have to. The choice is yours," I muttered lowly into her ear and felt her body relax against me, "let me help you, please."

My lasts words were more of a plea. I wasn't sure if it worked but I had to trust it did. Gradually lowering my hand, I let her go again. She wasted no time in kicking off the sand, sprinting toward the music and lights on the road. It didn't take me long to catch up to her, instantly throwing her over my shoulder as I had promised.

Rose pounded her fists against my back, flailing her legs as she yelled, "Sean you jerk, let go of me."

I ignored her because what else could I do? Making my way up the beach, I took a deep breath and began pushing my way through the mass of people. I spotted Miguel easily, standing next to his car. When his eyes locked with mine, I gestured for him to come over.

He arched a brow, running a hand through his raven black hair, "What's wrong?"

"I need the apartment for tonight. Can you find a place to crash?" It wasn't that I didn't trust Miguel, it was that I didn't trust Rose in this state.

"I'll make a plan. The place is all yours, Hermano," Miguel looked at Rose with concern clouding his eyes, "is she okay?"

"She'll be fine," I answered, offering him a tight-lipped smile.

He patted me on the shoulder twice before allowing me to leave. I didn't want to take her home because I didn't want to have the triplets see her this way. They never have seen her like this and they never will. She wanted to keep this side of her hidden from them. I also didn't want Dylan to worry himself over her.

Getting her — still kicking, screaming, and protesting — into the passenger seat of the car, I activated the child lock so she couldn't escape in the time it took me to reach the driver's side. She wore a scowl on her pretty face. I wanted to remove that scowl, see her lips curl into a smile, and be awestruck by those cute dimples of hers.

"This is so unfair," she pouted, crossing her arms over her chest, and glaring out the window.

With an exasperated sigh, I started the engine and said, "This is for your good," before driving off.

~~~

The sound of the engine paired with Beethoven playing on low volume lulled her to sleep. I didn't wake her. Instead, I carried her up to my apartment, tucked her into bed, and left her to get as much sleep as she could. With how things were going — downhill for the most part — I expected her to be awake soon with renewed energy. I was exhausted though.

Her soft purr-like snores filled the dark room. I sat beside her, just watching the steady rise and fall of her chest. Her dirty blonde hair was sprawled across my pillow in a mess of waves, pale skin holding a red tinge as she slept. I reached my hand out to trace her jawline with the tip of my finger but pulled away. If she woke up, there was no telling when she would fall back to sleep again.

I stealthily moved off the bed, tiptoeing my way to the window. When I arrived, I left her to sleep while I took a quick shower. For extra precaution, I locked the front door and found a way to lock the window so she wouldn't leave. I didn't want to treat her like a prisoner but what other choice did I have. It was relieving to see that she hadn't woken up during that time.

Opening the window, I offered one last glance over my shoulder to Rose before stepping out into the warm night's air. I was trying to give up smoking but it was times like these I needed the nicotine. It was my coping mechanism. Along with my pack of smokes, I pulled out my phone. I contemplated dialing his number more than once but this was the closest I ever got to it — my thumb hovering over his contact.

"Fuck it," I muttered into the night, hitting dial and waiting for him to answer.

"Sean?" My brother picked up on the first ring, "Is everything okay?"

I scoffed, a light chuckle causing my body to rock, "As if you care if anything's happened to me."

"Believe it or not, I do. You're my brother, it's not like I can change that," Dean sighed, "Are you drunk?"

"I wish," rolling my eyes at his idiotic insinuation, I quizzed, "why would think I'd phone you if I were drunk?"

A few seconds of silence passed between us before he huffed, "Point taken."

Taking a seat on the old iron steps of the fire escape, I groaned. My brother and I weren't the types to have a Heart to heart session but I wasn't ashamed to ask for his help when I needed it. Threading my fingers into my hair, I pulled until the point of physical pain, "I'm so fucking worried about her," I finally admitted, looking to the heavens for some sort of guidance.

"How bad is she?" He sounded more serious now.

"Not as bad as she could be," I glanced inside and found her still asleep, "that doesn't make me feel any better though."

"I know," if anyone knew what it felt like it was definitely Dean, "she'll be fine. It's who she is. You've got to love her enough to handle her. Every side of her whether she wants you there or not."

"I'm not going to leave her side," I voiced, leaning my head against the cool metal railing, "Is this why you never..." I let the sentence trail off, knowing he would catch on to my question.

"No, I'd always be there for her, and I've always loved her I just wasn't sure she was ready."

"Or, you were just being a pussy," I quipped, feeling a smirk tilt the corner of my lips upward, "you know I never meant for any of this shit to happen."

"I know," he chuckled but it lacked humor, "we can't help the people we fall in love with. That's the shitty part of it all. And, at the end of the day, the choice lies with her. I just want her to decide with a level head."

"So you still think I'm one of her impulsive decisions?"

"Do you blame me?" I could picture his risen, condescending eyebrow as he asked this question.

I had given it a lot of thought, maybe too much thought to be honest. When she first made the decision she seemed to have a stable mind but then again, how sure could I be. Only now were her symptoms showing to such an extreme but she could have been in the midst of her mania way before this. Maybe I wasn't looking closely enough. If I were, she wouldn't have gotten this bad.

"No, I don't blame you," I finally answered truthfully because I never lied to my brother.

"If in the end she still chooses you, I'll be happy. As long as she's happy," I could tell my brother meant that and I would probably do the same if she chose him.

"I'll take care of her, Dean," I reassured both him and myself.

I could do this. I could be there for her.

"I trust you, Sean. I wouldn't have told you to look out for her if I didn't," with that, he ended the call, leaving me alone with just my thoughts.

Well this was a tough chapter to write. You're going to listen to Who You Are by Jessie J (Song's above on the media).

Remember to hulk smash the star at the bottom of your screen!!!