"You think you're cute, don't you?" Nathan stormed over to where I was lying down. His face was hard and angry as he stared down at me. The muscles in his arms were tightening as he clenched his fists. There was something that had set Nathan off and I had no clue what it was this time.

I wasn't doing anything; I hadn't even made a noise since we hit the road. I had spent the last few hours hanging out on the only full-sized bed in the back of the bus. The bus had five beds in total, four tiny cubby holes and the big bed in the back that Nathan claimed. Since I was sleeping with Nathan every night, that meant I got to sleep in the big bed too, which was a relief. The little cubby beds gave me claustrophobia.

I was enjoying the silence as I was feverishly trying to come up with some lyrics for a song I was hearing in my head. The road noise was relaxing and I felt inspired to write for the first time in a long while. I was writing Cam's song. I knew I had to write it the moment the bus pulled away from the studio. This song was going to have everything I ever wanted to say to him but would never get the chance to. It was the one thing I would be able to keep to remind me of him. No one could take that away from me.

"Maybe I'm just a little bit cute." I said as I stretched and climbed up on my knees to get eye level with him.

"Where's your loyalty, Jess?" He said, pulling my chin up hard.

"What do you mean?" I asked, pulling my eyebrows together studying his face.

"You and Nash, before we left. You are an ungrateful whore. I should have let him have you. You're lucky I even let you on the bus after that shit." He pushed me back down to the bed. "You're not even worth the effort I put into booking this tour for you. Do you know that?"

"I'm sorry." I apologized. "Don't be mad at me. I didn't know he was going to show up today."

"I dropped you from the set. The band will perform without you." He sneered down at me.

"Nate, why? Is it because of what happened with Cam? There's nothing going on between the two of us. I chose to be here with you. Please don't do this to me." I reached for his arm and he yanked it away just as fast.

"It's not about that at all. I don't care about you and some other guy. You can screw anyone you want. This is about business Jess. Chick musicians don't bring in the cash. We need money if we are going to stay on the road. Having you here will cost me a fortune." He grabbed my quivering chin and squeezed until it hurt.

"You promised me." I trembled as I was slowly dying on the inside.

"I know it's so unfair, sweetheart. Sexism and all that shit. This is a rough industry. Don't worry about a thing. You can stay with us as long as you're useful to me." Nate released my chin and patted my cheek roughly.

"I...I..." My body was numb. My brain was screaming at me, telling me how stupid I was for thinking this was my break out tour. Bad Jessa was laughing as she stood over the limp body of the good Jessa. She had her hands around her throat, choking the little bit of life she had left. Good Jessa was slowly dying.

"Give me your phone Jess." He said, holding out his hand.

I looked down at the tiny little thing next to me on the bed. I picked it up in my hand and clutched it to my chest. It was my lifeline; it was the only thing that could get me out of this situation. I could use it to call my family to come get me. They would be disappointed with me, but maybe they could find a way to forgive me for doing this.

"Nate, I won't call anyone. I promise." I said, trying to sound like I meant it. If I could do a good enough job convincing him, then I could use it to call my parents at the next rest stop.

Nate pushed me back against the bed and I tried to scramble away from him to hold on to the only thing I had left that was mine. He was across the bed and was pinning me down before I could get away.

"Give me your fucking phone." He screamed as I held onto it and tried to bury it into my body so he couldn't get it from me. He was a lot stronger than I was and I was going to lose this battle. He reached his hand back like he was going to hit me and I curled up into a ball. I stuck out the phone towards him.

Nate snatched the phone out of my hand and climbed off me. As a parting gift, he grabbed me by the hair and slung me down on the floor. I sat there helplessly lying on my hands and knees as he walked over to the window. He opened it and looked back at me with an evil smirk. Nathan pushed his arm out the window with my phone in his hand. He laughed as he loosened his grip and let it go. I closed my eyes as I imagined I could hear the sound of the crunching glass on the blacktop.

He cut me off from everyone. I had nothing left.

I began weeping for everything I had just lost.

He walked over to his bag and pulled out a bottle of pills. He threw them over at me and I watched them bounce on my lap and hit the floor.

"Take these and get yourself together. We will be stopping soon and I don't want anyone to see you like this. My girl needs to be wild tonight, not this disgusting, needy mess. Pick yourself up. You look like shit."

I reached down and grabbed the bottle. I opened it and began to shake the pills out. I started to dump the whole bottle in my hands; maybe I could finally go through with this today.

Nathan grabbed the bottle back out of my hand before I could pour them all out.

"None of that, Jess. You will only get what I give you. I can't have you ending up in the hospital again."

I swallowed the three white pills in my hand. They would at least be enough to make me feel good for a little while. I would be flying high again in no time and Nathan wouldn't be able to bring me back down.

Nathan walked back over to me and helped me up from the floor. He pulled me into his chest and wrapped his arms around me.

"You know I am only looking out for you, Jess. No one else cares about you the way I do." He whispered. "Now, let's go buy you something nice to wear when you meet the band tomorrow. I want you to feel special."

I nodded against him and I felt the rumble in his chest as he laughed at me.

We were only about three hours from home and Nathan had already made sure I had to need him. I had no money, no way to contact anyone, and no one who knew where I would be. Nathan had found a way to isolate me from everything.

He broke me.

Nathan fucking broke me.