It feels like you have the world.

Bright blossoms of red and blue, scattered with glittering gems of laughter.

But it is precarious, all held in a beautiful glass jar balanced on the tip of your finger.

That was what it is like, having Jeon Jungkook.

Having Jeon Jungkook is also like dating your phone.

You keep careful distance and barely speak to each other during the day.
There is just always too many people around.

It was painful sometimes, watching him from a distance and tearing your eyes away before you looked too desperate.

And all the moments you glance over only to see him staring at you, his eyes dark and intense.

You're used to your heart racing and your face going red all the time now.

It's embarrassing when your coworkers get weirded out as they catch you getting all flustered for no apparent reason, but sadly enough you've accepted the random bursts of embarrassment.

Even more sadly, they've accepted it about you too.

"Well, this is my life now," you sigh into the phone.

Jungkook laughs, his eyes crinkling.

"Ahh, that's funny...... And today Jin hyung also asked me why I keep looking toward stage left during rehearsal... but it was because you were standing over there. And everyone stopped to listen to my answer, like all the hyungs and even the staff! So I said it's because I have a crick in my neck and it hurt less when I looked that way!"

The image of him shook as he laughed harder, barely keeping his face on the screen.

You grin at his story.

Then you sigh, remembering another incident.

"Oh, yesterday during lunch I was reading a text from you, but a co-worker walked up beside me and I panicked so hard I jumped up and smashed my head into her face..."

He wipes a tear from the corner of his eye.

"And it really hurt her! It was terrible, I was apologizing for so long and her face was a little bruised today. Even Myungsoo was saying that I need to get......"

You trail off, seeing the laughter fade off his face.

Damn it, why can't you just remember to keep Myungsoo's name out of his earshot...

You punch yourself mentally, putting your face into your hand.

"It's okay," comes Jungkook's voice, after a short pause.

"I should learn to trust you."

You look at his calm face on your phone, a little in disbelief.

"... Really?"

"Yes, I'll try," he nods.

"Jungkook-ssi...!" you exclaim encouragingly, your voice bright and happy with praise.

"That's right," he raises his chin, grinning.

As you giggle, he looks away with a smile.

"Bogoshipo," he says quietly.

He's turned to the side, staring blankly at the ground.

"I miss you too," you whisper.

"I don't know what it's like to have lunch with you," he whispers back.

His face is carefully blank, but you see the slight tilt of his mouth.

Your chest aches for him, but you hard as you might, you can't find anything to argue.

"I... I'm happy. To just have you. Like this," you try.

"It's not enough."

Your heart drops.

"What are you saying?" you ask, your voice flat.

He looks up sharply at your tone.

"Wha... No, no, I didn't mean... No, I only meant, I want more than this."

You exhale with relief.

"I see."

"Bogoshipo," he repeats, firmly this time.

"I know, but we can't just..."

"We, Bangtan, should be back in the dorms tomorrow night. And earlier than usual too. Can you... can we... meet?"

His eyes are wide, his lips parted.

Your own mouth falls open.

"That's... what are the other members going to say?"

"You already came over last time, to eat with V hyung," he counters, his voice dropping a little as he emphasizes with V hyung.

"There was nothing wrong with that back then. But now... what if... what if we say or do something..."

"We won't. Besides, it's only the hyungs. I don't really have to hide anything from them. I haven't told them, but I'm thinking that I want to."