PLEASE READ THE CHAPTER BEFORE THIS, IT’S ABOUT A NEW STORY I’M PROBABLY STARTING SOON. I NEED YOU OPINIONS.

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My consciousness slowly got back to me as I woke up from my deep slumber by a soft voice talking. After a few seconds I recognized the voice as Ashton’s.

“I know that” Ashton spoke and I didn’t know if he was talking to himself, someone else or me. I slowly opened my eyes and blinked a few times to get them working before seeing the empty spot in front of me. I frowned and turned my head, seeing Ashton sitting at the foot of my bed with his back facing me.

“I know, and I’m sorry for that” he said in a hushed tone as he spoke into the phone that was pressed against his ear.

I kept quiet, pretending to be asleep so I could listen to his conversation. I mean, it couldn’t really be a secret conversation if he didn’t even leave the room for it. 

“Kelly, listen to me” Ashton sighed and I tensed up. Should I really listen to him and his girlfriend fighting over the phone? I thought about it until I heard my own name being called in the conversation and I decided to listen extra carefully.

“Luke is my friend, Kelly, so is Michael and Calum. I haven’t had a friend like him in.. forever. Don’t make me look like a bad guy in this just because I have made friends” Ashton snapped, raising his voice just a bit to prove his point.

“You upset me last night, I upset you. You know if we had that date, it would’ve been a disaster” Ashton whispered soon after. I heard a quiet voice from Ashton’s phone speaking back to him. He let his hand comb through his hair that he had now let out from the hair tie and he sighed quietly.

“It’s okay, I’m not mad” he said with a soft voice. “And I love you too, always will. You know that”

I could feel my heart sink in my stomach. I had never really heard him say that to her, at least not since I have fallen for Ashton myself, and I didn’t like it. I didn’t like hearing the boy I’m falling for, telling his girlfriend he loves her. That’s not fair, he’s naked in my bed right now, it’s not right.

He kept talking to his girlfriend in a quiet tone and mumbled small sweet apologies into the phone and I could feel my insides burning. I was jealous. I had never been jealous within love, and I was happy I hadn’t because this was awful. It wasn’t like normal jealousy, this was ten times worse.

This boy in front of me was mine, or at least I wanted him to be. No, he will be.

I slowly sat up from my lying position and stretched my limbs. Ashton turned around to look at me up and down before smiling big. He kept talking to his girlfriend and I felt the jealousy in me take over. I slowly crawled over to Ashton and sat down behind him. Ashton looked at me with over his shoulder, smiling lightly while giving me a look of confusion.

“Mhm, that sounds good” Ashton spoke into the phone while watching my every move.

I drew my hands up and down his bare back as he kept mumbling stuff I didn’t care about to his girlfriend. I let my arms go around his so my hands found his chest and let my warm hand caress his soft tan skin. I could hear him sigh contently by my touch while talking on the phone and I smirked small.

I leaned in and placed the tip of my nose on the back of his neck, breathing in deeply, taking in his amazing natural scent. I let my hands caress him as I placed my lips on his neck and planted butterfly kisses from his neck to his shoulder, then back to his neck and other shoulder. I could feel him shiver under my touch and the smirk grew bigger.

“I-I think that sounds great, Kel” he stuttered because of my movements. I felt like the dominant right now, and I liked it.

I let my hand wander back to his back and I slowly and oh so carefully let my nails scrape his back. I looked at the marks I did last night and smiled, knowing he was mine for the night and we were that close and he made me feel that good.

Ashton sighed quietly again and let his head fall to the side, making me quickly land my lips on his warm skin of his neck. I let my lips wander up and down in butterfly kisses before kissing the skin more roughly, biting and liking. Ashton reached his arm back, placing his hand in my hair, caressing and massaging my scalp while lightly tugging my hair.

“Y-yeah, that sounds nice Kelly, I’ll buy that for you today. I gotta go now though, see you later. Love you, bye” Ashton ushered out before hanging up his phone. He threw the phone on the bed and turned around to face me.

“You’re a little sneaky shit, aren’t you?” Ashton chuckled before leaning in to place his lips on mine. I leaned back, letting him furrow his eyebrows at me.

“Morning breath” I pointed out. He rolled his eyes.

“Are you really gonna turn me on like that while I’m on the phone with my girlfriend and then when I’m all for it you’re gonna reject me?” he asked, placing his hands over his heart while acting offended. I smiled at him and let my hands comb through his long honey colored locks.

“What did Kelly want?” I asked, trying not to show my hatred and jealousy. Ashton sighed and leaned over to pull me down on the mattress while he was lying on top of me, his head on my chest while my hands were still in his hair.

“She wanted to talk about yesterday” he yawned.

“What about it?” I questioned. I knew it didn’t end like I wanted it to because I could hear them making up, but it never hurts to ask.

“She was mad about what I said but I was mad about what she said. We talked it through though and we both said our apologies” he said into my chest.

“That’s good” I lied through gritted teeth, but it seemed like Ashton didn’t notice my lying.

“Gotta buy her this dress that comes out today by this designer shit that is in Sydney for the week. Designer clothes is the best apology, you know” he chuckled. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“You buy her stuff so she will forgive you? She’s the one who should apologize, not you” I said, feeling irritation build up because of Kelly. Ashton lifted his head from my chest to look at me.

“We’re guys Luke, we never win those kinds of arguments. Just do what your girl wants you to do and your relationship will go through smoothly” he laughed and I couldn’t disagree more.

“Sounds to me like she’s using you for your money” I mumbled out, making Ashton look at me. He laid his head down on my chest again and breathed out loud.

“I have the money, it’s not like she’s taking all I got. I can afford her wishes, it makes her satisfied” he shrugged and I shook my head while sighing.

He didn’t see the obvious in front of him. She used him and it was so obvious since the first day I saw them together. How he let her drive his car, how he gave her around one hundred dollars just for them to go to the mall, how he always gave her what she wanted. Did she even love him? I was so much better for him, he was just too blind to see it.

I shrugged Aston off of me so I could sit up on the edge of the bed.

“What?” Ashton asked as he sat up on the mattress behind me. I didn’t answer; I just bent down to put on my t-shirt that was lying on the floor.

“You want any breakfast?” I asked as I stood up from the bed and put on my grey sweats.

“Are you mad at me or something?” Ashton chuckled while having his eyebrows raised in a judgmental way.

“Nope” I answered quickly while throwing a pair of sweats for him to wear. He caught them in his hands before they could hit his face.

“Why are you mad at me? Just minutes ago you were ready to fuck me while I was on the phone with Kelly” Ashton scoffed.

“I said I’m not mad at you. So what do you want for breakfast?” I said back, ignoring the burning irritation and jealousy inside of me.

“Luke, please” Ashton scoffed while pulling on the sweats on his naked body. “You’re fucking mad, I’m not oblivious. Tell me why you are being so bipolar”

He looked at me with raised eyebrows and big eyes. He looked frustrated. I just shrugged.

“For the third time, I’m not mad at you Ash. Now, what the fuck do you want for breakfast?” I shot back. I didn’t mean for my irritation to be thrown over Ashton, but I couldn’t help it. I was never good at holding in my anger and irritation. It was a problem that I couldn’t control by myself.

“I want you to tell me why the fuck you are mad?!” Ashton raised his voice while walking closer to me.

“You’re not oblivious to my anger but you are oblivious to your girlfriend’s gold digger act, good job Ash, awesome” I said in pure sarcasm while clapping my hands in small applauds. Ashton furrowed his eyebrows together and threw his hands up in frustration.

“That’s what this is about? You mourning over my fucking relationship? You have nothing to do with my relationship, Luke. I can handle that shit how the hell I want, don’t you fucking come here and call my girlfriend out” he spit out while walking closer to me. I could feel my fists clench up and I feared of what I could do if this got any further.

I stayed quiet and tried to count my breaths. I didn’t want to do or say anything that I knew I would regret.

“You have no say in my relationship, keep your shit to your own fucked up relationship” Ashton sneered, making me clench my fists ever harder, feeling my nails dig in to the palms. “I didn’t come here to talk yesterday, I came here to fúck” he said.

Ashton shook his head before bending down and picking up all his clothes from the floor. He put them on while walking around, collecting his phone and other stuff lying around.

I walked over to him and pressed him up against the wall. He looked at me in surprise, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. “What are you doing?” he asked in a quiet voice. I leaned in closer and let my lips brush against his ear as I let my hand land on his díck. I slowly started to palm him while breathing hotly against his ear.

I wasn’t bipolar, I just wanted to show him that he was wrong in forgiving his girlfriend. He was wrong in defending and choosing her. I could make him feel better than her. I could treat him better than her. I was better than her.

“If you’re not here to talk, then let’s fúck” I whispered against his skin.

“No Luke, stop” Ashton struggled to say as he tried to push me away, but it didn’t work. His lame attempt showed me that he actually wanted this. His growing díck under my hand told me the same thing too.

“I don’t want to fight with you, Ash” I whispered between kisses I placed on his neck. I kept palming him, even harder when he thrust his hips forward, meeting my hand‘s movements.

“Me neither” Ashton whimpered out, his breaths deep and slow.

“I just want you to feel good, you know that” I whispered as I started sucking around his Adam’s apple. I could feel him swallowing.

“I know” he breathed before taking a grip of my face and bringing it up his, making me look his in his dark lustful eyes. I kept palming him, making him let out small quiet moans. “I’m sorry about what I said”

I leaned closer to him and placed my forehead on his, nuzzling our noses together. “I don’t mind, you were right. I have no say in your relationship, especially not when my relationship isn’t even a relationship, it’s just a lie”

I let my forehead leave his so I could brush my lips against his. I slowly let my hand wander from his clothed groin to the hem of his (or my) sweats and let my hand get inside. He wasn’t wearing any boxers, so my hand easily found his hard member.

I gripped his díck and enjoyed the sound of his breathing going rigid and his hands gripping my t-shirt hard.

“If only this was how Kelly would apologize” Ashton chuckled breathlessly between moans. I stopped my movements and leaned in to place my lips on his. He responded immediately but I pulled away as soon after to bite down on his bottom lip quite hard. I heard him whimper and I gripped his length harder while giving him a few pumps.

“Don’t fucking talk about her while I’m jerking you off” I grumbled before pumping his whole length, from base to tip, while letting my thumb flick his head to smear out the precum.

“S-sorry” Ashton stuttered before letting out a moan and whimper. I liked seeing him like this. I liked knowing I was the one to make him feel like this. I liked that I was the one to do this and not Kelly. I bet she can’t make him feel as good as I do.

I was still mad at him. I mean, I wasn’t mad at Ashton really, I was just mad at him for being s damn oblivious. I was mad at his girlfriend. I knew she didn’t like me, at least from what she had said yesterday, and that made it even simpler for me to dislike her.

I don’t know where this jealousy came from, but I’m pretty sure I’m not that good at handling it. Just like my anger and sadness. Just another thing to add on that list I guess.

“You made me feel so good last night” I said as I licked and sucked between his neck and his shoulder.

“I did?” Ashton asked as he let his hands slide down to my ass, squeezing it and keeping me close. I gasped at the feeling of him gripping me whit his large hands.

“Mhm” I let out before I started pumping him faster. I let my lips meet his in a passionate kiss. I tried to show him all the feelings I had for him in this kiss, but I knew he wouldn’t understand.

He kissed back and let his tongue find its way inside my mouth to explore it like it always does. Every kiss we share is like a new one. Nothing is ever the same. Nothing is ever the same when we have sex either. Every touch is a new experience and I feel sparks every time he says my name.

I wish he in some way feels something for me. He must at least be attracted to me, otherwise I wouldn’t be holding his rock hard díck in my hand, but that doesn’t mean he has feelings for me.

I kissed him harder in order to get all these depressing thoughts out of my head. I sucked the top of his tongue and heard him moan into the kiss. I pulled away soon after.

“Keep quiet, my family is home” I told him before going down on my knees and pulling his sweats down to his knees. I took a grip of his rock hard díck, slowly lowering myself down to kiss his red swollen head.

I licked around it and smeared out the precum before taking him all in me in one go. I ignored the burning feeling in my throat and the tears prickling my eyes as I felt him at the back of my throat. I felt my nose touched his pelvis and I could hear Ashton struggling to keep his moans in.

I bobbed my head up and down, letting him slid up and down my throat. He let out a throaty moan, making me dig my nails into his thigh to silently tell him to keep quiet. He whimpered as a respond.

I bobbed my head a few times and went up, swirling my tongue around his head before he came, filling my mouth. He came with a small whimper, desperately trying to keep the moans inside. I easily swallowed and leaned down to lick up the rest around his swollen member.

When he was clean I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand before standing up. I looked at Ashton in front of me. He was leaning against the wall while breathing heavily. His head was hanging down and his chest was working up and down. I bent down and pulled up his pants before turning around to go to the bathroom.

I was stopped when Ashton gripped my wrist, pulling me back. He grabbed my face and looked at me. He let his thumb brush against my red swollen lips and he hummed. “Perfect” he whispered out as he caressed my cheek. I looked at him in the eyes and shook my head.

“Don’t say that” I said, my voice hoarse after the rough blówjob. I didn’t want him to talk to me that way because I didn’t want him to lead me on. I didn’t want him to give me false hope. I didn’t know if what he said was true and if he did feel things around me, but it was too big of a risk to actually ask him.

I took away his hands from my face and sighed as I walked over to the bathroom. I washed my hands and gurgled my mouth with water before splashing my face in cold water as well.

“Are you mad at me? For real now, Luke” I heard Ashton ask behind me. I stood up and looked at the boy behind me through the mirror. He looked small and vulnerable. I smiled small at him through the mirror and shook my head.

“No” I whispered out. And it was true, I wasn’t mad at him. I was just sad because I was in such a hard battle between my feeling and my senses. It was a war between my heart and my brain, both telling me different things and I just felt like breaking out in tears. I have never felt this way for a person ever, and it sucks to know that person loves someone else.

Ashton walked over to me from the place where he stood and placed his arms around my waist and his chin on shoulder. “Why are you so down then?” he whispered into my ear, making me shiver slightly.

“I don’t know” I shrugged while looking down in the sink. “I think I’m just having a bad day. That’s why I snapped at you before” I lied. “And, I’m sorry. Again”

“You don’t need to say you’re sorry, babe. I shouldn’t have snapped back, I don’t know why I did, it was stupid. And I didn’t mean any of the offensive shit I said, you know that. I came here to hang out with you, to be with you, not just to.. you know” he said and I nodded, chuckling lightly.

I looked up into the mirror and looked at myself and Ashton. I reached up my hand to touch my red swollen lips. Ashton reached up and took my hand in his. He took my one finger and traced my lips all around.

“You are perfect” he whispered out and I was just about to protest when he spoke up before me. “You are perfect, Luke, and I don’t care if you don’t think the same or hate that I tell you that, but you are” he said as he looked straight into my eyes through the mirror.

He released my hand and let it drop to my side as he kept tracing my lips with his own fingers. “To think this is because you want to pleasure me. To think you can barely talk just because you want to make me feel good is something I will never understand, because no human being has ever been this thoughtful and kind to me.

“It doesn’t care if it’s sex or not, you are always this thoughtful and kind and you are probably the best human being I have ever met. I wished I had met you earlier in life so my life could be different right now, better different. Before you I had basically no one, now I have you, Michael and Calum, and I am forever grateful for that” he said sincerely and I stood still, watching his every move, feeling his every touch and taking in his every word.

“You make me feel some type of way, Luke Hemmings, and I thank God every day for you” he whispered before turning me around in his arms. He let his lips find mine and they moved in sync with each other.

We had gotten to know each other so good. Everything was so easy and our lips fitted like a puzzle. Our hands knew exactly where to go and where to land. I felt like I was meant to be with him, and I wanted him to know that so badly. I wanted him to be mine and even though those words he just said made their way straight into my heart, they still didn’t tell me what I wanted to hear to know exactly that I could sacrifice everything around me just to be with him.

All through the kiss, Ashton’s phone started to ring in the bedroom. “Ignore it” he said into the kiss. He let his lips move swiftly with mine, tongues dance in sync. It was far from a messy and sloppy kiss, it was gently, soft and slow. It was a kiss that could go on forever, but didn’t because we got interrupted by Ashton’s phone once again.

Ashton pulled away from me and sighed. He looked at me with his big hazel eyes. “Go answer it” I smiled at him and he pecked me many times on my lips before running out to my bedroom and answering his phone. I sighed quietly before turning around and looking at myself in the mirror. I looked torn. Torn between happy and sad.

I leaned down to splash my face with cold water once again before walking into my bedroom. “Okay fine, I’ll be there in twenty” Ashton sighed into his phone before hanging up and looking up at me. He walked over and kissed me slowly.

“I have to get to work, something is up” he whispered against my lips. I nodded and gave him a false smile.

“What time is it?” I asked him while walking over to sit on my bed.

“10:07” he read from his phone as he started to get dressed in the clothes he wore yesterday. I furrowed my eyebrows.

“That early?” I said shocked. Ashton laughed lightly and nodded his head. He got dressed and I watched him. He walked into my bathroom to brush his teeth and fix his hair a bit. He walked out and smiled at me. He walked over and stood between my legs.

“Follow me to the door?” he asked quietly, his big eyes pleading. I chuckled and nodded my head, standing up and taking his hand in mine.

We walked out of my room. I could hear Ben snore from his room and I knew Jack hadn’t come home last night because his bedroom door was wide open and he never gets up before eleven. I heard shuffle from the kitchen and I knew my mother was there. I sighed and let go of Ashton’s hand. He understood right away and gave me a small smile.

We walked down the stairs and into the hallway. My mom’s head stuck out from the kitchen, her face wearing a confused look.

“Ashton! I thought I saw a car outside I didn’t recognize” My mom said and walked over to Ash, giving him a motherly hug. Ashton smiled big at her. “You slept over?” she asked and I kept quiet, not really trusting my own lying.

“Yeah, came over last night and we just chilled and then fell asleep quite early, never had the chance to meet you last night” Ashton smiled politely, lying straight in her face. Better him than me though, I wouldn’t be able to do it.

“No, I came home way too late” she shook her head before looking Ashton up and down. “Aren’t you staying for breakfast?” she asked.

“No I need to get to work, some work emergency” he smiled, waving it off like nothing.

“I was wondering why you were up so early” she said and looked at me. “Well, I can’t let you go with an empty stomach, I’ll wrap something up for you, dear”

“Oh no, that’s not necessary” Ashton protested.

“Don’t start with me young man, I know you are hungry and if you are going to work you need some energy” she said and started walking away and disappearing into the kitchen. Ashton laughed and I shook my head.

I walked over to him and kept my gaze towards the kitchen so my mom wouldn’t stick her head out and catch us. I laid my hand on Ashton’s cheek and leaned in, kissing him carefully while hearing my mother rumble in the fridge, knowing she was too busy making breakfast for Ash to catch us doing anything.

Ashton placed his hands on my waist and pulled me closer, kissing me very quietly to not let mom hear any smacking from us exchanging saliva.

“Ashton dear, do you drink coffee?” mom called out from the kitchen, making Ashton pull away faster than ever. He cleared his throat before responding with a “yeah”.

I kissed Ashton quickly again before stepping away and sitting down in the stairs, smiling small at Ashton. He smiled back, winking at me.

Mom came out just seconds after with a wrapped up sandwich and a takeaway cup of coffee in her hands. She handed them to Ashton and he smiled at my mother. “Thank you so much Ms. Hemmings” he said.

“Please, call me Liz, you know that” she laughed before patting him on his cheek and leaving to go back to the kitchen again, disappearing out of sight.

Ashton looked at me again, smiling. He leaned down and pecked me on my lips once before standing up and opening the front door. “I’ll text or call you” he said before leaving with a small smile. I smiled back and closed the door after him. I sighed loud and slowly made my way into the kitchen.

“Do you have any idea where your brother is? I can’t get a hold of him” my mom said just as I had sat down on one of the chairs.

“He went to Max’s last night, he’s probably still there” I mumbled out while munching on some rather cold bacon on the plate on the table. Mom nodded and slurped on her coffee while reading the newspaper. I kept eating my bacon while looking around mindlessly in the kitchen.

“Luke?” mom said and I turned to look at her.

“Yeah?”

“Your lips are so red and swollen, are you starting to get sick, darling?” she asked, looking worried. I tensed and my eyes widened a bit.

“N-no, I accidentally ate some sesame seeds yesterday and I guess the allergies came over night. I didn’t eat much though, does it look that bad?” I hurriedly lied, hoping my mother would fall for it.

“Luke! You know you are allergic, you have to be more careful! And no, it doesn’t look that bad but I think you should take some ointment on just in case” she said and I nodded, thanking the lords that I came up with a lie that fast.

I grabbed one more bacon bit before running up stairs and into my room. I walked into my bathroom and sighed loudly. Holy fucking shit.

**

“Mom, I’m going to Michael’s!” I called out. It was around eleven, a bit over that and I just needed to get out of the house. I dressed in skinny jeans, a ripped tank top and a snapback. I pulled on my worn out vans my mother had tried to throw out so many times.

“Okay, say hi from me!” she called back before I made my way out of the house. I unlocked my car and sat inside, wincing from the heat radiating from the black leather seats. I started the car and let the sound of the radio flow out in the car as I made my way to Michael’s. It wasn’t a long drive, maybe around 6-7 minutes.

I knew Michael wouldn’t be awake at this time, hell not even I use to be, but I really needed to get out of the house and I needed to talk to my best friend. I had texted Calum, saying he should go to Michael’s when he woke up because I wanted to have him there too.

Tell Me Baby by Red Hot Chili Peppers was playing and I turned up the volume while nodding my head to the music. Listening to this song just makes me want to run away and take Ashton with me. Forget about all the stupid things around and just be happy, make him happy. Letting the innocence go and just live my life free with him. That’s what I would like to happen. It probably won’t though.

I sighed once again as I pulled up onto Michael’s driveway. I turned off the car and made my way out, slowly walking around the house to Michael’s room. He had his own door to his room and I turned the knob to the door, slowly opening it. I knew he didn’t lock it, because no one would break into this house anyway. They have dogs, but they are the nicest dogs ever, though robbers don’t know that.

I stepped in and closed the door behind me. I was surrounded by faint darkness. I took off my shoes and walked over to the sleeping Michael in his huge bed. I took off my snapback before lifting the covers off of Michael to crawl in beside him. I nuzzled into his side, already feeling this heavy sadness hide away.

Michael stirred a bit before turning around to lie on his side, his face facing me. He draped his arm around me and I nuzzled my face in the crook of his neck, sighing contently. Michael breathed out heavily and hummed.

“Why are you here so early, Luke?” Michael said with a groggy morning voice. He didn’t even need to open his eyes to know it was me.

“You don’t even know what time it is” I said back, still nuzzled into his neck.

“I’m still tired, so it’s still too early” he mumbled and I didn’t answer. He pulled me closer to him, hugging me like I was a teddy bear. This wasn’t weird, this wasn’t weird at all. Maybe for some people, but not for us. We have known each other since forever and this was normal for us. Just cuddling with each other and just being there for your best friends.

“Why are you here?” Michael asked, breathing into my flat hair.

“I’m sad” I mumbled. Michael moved around a bit so his face was now on the pillow beside me, making me look at him. He still had his arms draped around my waist. He looked at me with tired eyes before speaking again.

“Why?”

I shrugged, looking at him as I was thinking about my answer. “Is it about Ashton?” Michael said before I had the chance to speak. I looked deeply into his green eyes before nodding slowly.

“What did he do?” Michael asked worriedly. I was just about to speak up when the door opened and Calum walked in. He swore when he stumbled over my shoe while he took off his own. He looked up to see me and Michael in the bed.

“Did you start the cuddle before I had come here?” he pouted and made his way over to the bed. He crawled down beside me, making me lie in the middle of my best friends. He made himself comfortable before letting out a content sigh.

“Luke is sad” Michael said and Calum furrowed his eyebrows. I turned so I was lying on my back while Michael and Calum were lying on their sides, facing me.

“Why?” Calum said, just the same worry as Michael. I sighed and Michael spoke up.

“It has something to do about Ashton, more I don’t know” he said quietly.

“What happened?” Calum questioned. He moved closer to me so I was sandwiched between the two, I didn’t complain though, I was comfortable and felt safe.

I kept quiet for a while, not really knowing what to say. My emotions and feelings were running wild and I didn’t know how to explain why I was sad. Calum and Michael kept quiet, just waiting for me to speak up.

“I think I’m in love” I whispered out, admitting it for the first time, even to myself. “But Ashton doesn’t have any feelings for me”

“How do you know that?” Calum asked as he put his head on my chest and Michael hugged me closer.

“Because he loves his girlfriend” I said simply.

“That doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel anything for you. How do you even know he is in love with his girlfriend?” Michael questioned.

“Because he told me, and he tells her every day” I mumbled.

“I’m sorry, Luke” Calum spoke up after a while.

“Don’t be, I should have listened to you. You were right all along. Friends with benefits always end up with feelings getting in the way” I sighed and closed my eyes.

“No don’t say that, Luke. Michael and I both see the way Ashton is around you. He must feel something towards you, or else the world is fucked up” Calum said as he lifted his head to look at me and Michael. Michael nodded in agreement beside me.

“Yeah, exactly! And who wouldn’t want to be with a dude like you? I mean come on; a nine foot tall blonde bombshell!” Michael said, making me laugh lightly. By hearing my quiet laughs Michael burst out in a big smile.

“Yeah! And the fact that you can play guitar and sing with your angelic voice makes hundreds of guys want to get into your pants!” Calum added, making me laugh even more.

We all cuddle up against each other and I took a deep breath. “Thank you, I love you guys. Don’t know where I would be without you” I whispered. Michael and Calum threw their arms around me, hugging me until I almost couldn’t breathe. “They mumbled back their own ‘I love you’s before lying back down again. Me still pressed in the middle.

 “Let’s talk about something positive, like how it’s soon Christmas and I have already got all your gifts” Calum said proudly.

“What? I thought we would buy a gift together for Luke!” Michael said and looked at the raven haired boy offended.

“Yeah sorry bro, that didn’t happen” Calum said and buried his face in my shirt.

“What would you buy for me?” I asked.

“I’m not telling, but it was fucking good. But now you won’t get it because Calum is an ass” Michael muttered.

“Oh, stop being such a diva Michaela” Calum teased.

“Shut the fuck up” Michael said angrily as he looked up at Calum. Calum smirked, making me laugh at the two of them. I threw my arms around Michael to hug him, making him chuckle and forgetting about the teasing.

We laid in the bed, quiet for a long while and just enjoying each other’s company. I knew my problem wasn’t solved and I was still in love with Ashton who loved his girlfriend and I was still torn in two, but my best friends made me smile in a sad situation like this. They made me feel good and I know that whatever happens, I will be okay.

“You know, I’ve been thinking about one thing,” Calum spoke up after a while of silence. Michael and I turned our heads to look at the deep thinking boy.

“What?” I asked.

“Why do they call it ‘coming out of the closet’? Like that has nothing to do with telling people your sexuality” he said and his eyebrows were furrowed together and it looked like he had been thinking about this for a long time. I chuckled while watching him.

“What would you call it then?” Michael asked as he placed his chin on my shoulder.

“I’m glad you asked Mikey, because I have been thinking about this for a while now and I think I have come up with a great new term for coming out as whatever sexuality you have” Calum spoke up, a proud smile plastered on his face.

“Go on” I said, wanting him to tell us.

“You should say; ‘He/she isn’t thinking straight anymore’ when someone has come out” Calum said. Michael and I kept quiet for a while before bursting into laughter. “What?” Calum asked, offended.

“That was so lame, oh my god Calum” Michael laughed, me joining him.

“Well, I thought it was clever, but whatever, it’s your choice” Calum shrugged as he turned around so his back was facing us.

“Oh, look who’s the diva now” Michael scoffed playfully. Calum put his hand up, giving Michael the finger before turning back around, letting his arm drape around me lazily.

“On another note,” Michael started after a while, “Luke has given a blowjob today!”

Calum lifted his head to study my face and I could feel my cheek grow hot. “No I haven’t” I defended myself, not well enough though because they could both see through the lie.

“Don’t lie to me Blondie, I know it’s dark in here but I see your red and swollen lips, I know that’s because of a blowjob. You don’t get those kinds of lips from kissing” Michael scoffed. Calum smirked beside me and I slapped him and then Michael.

“How is it to have a díck in your mouth?” Calum asked. I stiffened and turned to look at my friend with big eyes.

“How is it to have a díck in your ass?” Michael asked from the other side of me, making me turn to him with just as big eyes as before.

“What? No, I’m not telling you that! I won’t- what- no” I stuttered, feeling flustered all of a sudden. Michael and Calum laughed and I felt my cheeks heat up even more.

“Fine, don’t tell us now, we’ll just get you drunk and you will tell us everything within seconds” Michael smirked. I smacked him and Calum again before laying my head down on my pillow again, quietly joining them in their laughter.

-       -       -

This chapter sucked balls I’m sorry.

Slow update in this but I felt like no one really appreciated this story so I was kind of overweighing about continuing or not but I will, I just had a bad moment lol.

Pleeease comment and vote, that is what makes me want to keep writing.

Ok bye