Min Yoongi

Where is everyone?

I was once popular, once loved, once cared for.

I used to smile everyday, laugh happily, talk with passion.

Then it was downhill from there...the world decided to turn on me.

I'm not popular, no one loves me, there's nothing about me to care about.

I smile less, laugh almost never, talk like a dead man.

Everyone thinks I'm gone, I'm dead, I don't exist anymore.

Everything thinks I'm nobody, my life ended, I'm not around anymore.

But.....I'm still here.

I never left, I'm alive, I still exist.

I'm pretty sure....

I don't know.

What happened?

I'm still myself, still me, still around.

Just no happiness, no joy, no cheer, no purpose.

Actually, I'm myself....just seeing the real world through a different lens.

I'm invisible, I'm see through, I'm unknown.

I got used to that.

It's become something that never leaves my mind.

My eyes.

My heart.

My life.

I live in an old and dark warehouse.

I don't eat, I don't sleep.

No one else, no one to talk to, nothing to look forward to. Nothing to do.

I hope. I wish. I wait.

Hopeful, Magical, Patient.

Those words sounded better in my head.

I go around town everyday hoping someone would see me and my loneliness.

My suffering, maybe.

4 years....no one.

They don't see me.

They don't see my smile. They don't hear my greetings.

They don't see me trying.

Trying to make life the same.

Trying to cope

Trying to be normal.

Trying to fit in.

Trying to fight back.

Trying to see beauty.

Trying to find the good things in the world.

Trying to hold the anger in.

Trying to hold the tears.

Trying to breath.

Trying to talk.

Trying to smile without force.

Trying to laugh.

.....trying to make friends.....

But I won't go?

I won't die. I already have.

I'm too lazy to do it again.

I don't visit town anymore. I don't even try anymore.

I actually try to avoid people.

Avoid happiness.

Avoid laughing.

Avoid smiling.

Avoid society.

Avoid humans.

Avoid the past.

Avoid the memories.

Avoid the good things.

Avoid everything.

I go to the unknown beach just outside town. I stare at the calm waters. I can see my happy self getting pushed away by angry waves.

Leaving me.

Replacing me.

Making me realize.

It's different now.

And it's too late.

Way too late.

I've never been to this beach before, but it's telling me more about myself than I know.

Than I knew.

It's telling me the truth.

"thank you, beach"

I stare at the sunset. I think.

I stare at the sky. I ponder.

I stare at my reflection. I wonder.

I stare at the water. I smile.

A real smile.

Because I know now.

I actually have an idea.

I smile.

Because my brain is working.

I smile.

Because I like this idea.

I have something to do.

I will finally go to sleep.

After 4 years.

Frustrating.

Hard.

Depressing.

Confusing.

Years.

I will finally leave this place and hopefully start again.

Somewhere else.

"don't make the same mistake twice"

This will make avoiding the world way easier.

Because I won't be on it anymore.

Makes sense.

Makes a lot of sense.

Seeing how good I look in my reflection on the water...

Let's see how good I look in it.

Boy meets ____

Boy meets water