Christian's POV

Was there really a way to explain just how huge that fear of losing her was? If something happened to her.. I'd die. My Lana.. Gods, I trusted no one near her.. To know that she was alright, I insisted on having her near.. It was something way too strong for me to be able to control.

And so I didn't.. I didn't care whether or not someone opposed to me. I had to see her.. Make sure she was alright. She wasn't even aware just how damn much I was ready to do for her. Kill for her, die for her.. Hell, I was ready to do anything for her. Just to keep her safe.

And now I had her there in the car beside me.. I had her near me, closer to me, against me.. I needed that closeness.. I was desperate for that closeness. I was damn insatiable and there didn't seem to be a cure.

No, I didn't sleep.. I couldn't fucking function without having her near because that was the only way I could know she was alright.. With the safety I provided for her. I was responsible for her safety. In my arms, to protect, cherish and worship.. To hold her until she was soothed and asleep.

And I was aware I had to let go.. I swore to her that I wouldn't start a war with her family. I knew her well.. I knew her weaknesses and I swore I would never the cause of her hurt. So when she told me she was ready to talk to her father, tell them about all the things that happened between us.. It was a true relief.

I refused to have to hide her. I refused to have to kidnap her just so I could have her for myself for a bit. I loved her. I adored her. And that is why I had to hold onto my patience for a bit more.. Wait until she was ready.. And perhaps that 'ready' would mean war, but hell, if it came to that, I was ready to win it all for her.

I explained some parts of the plan to her.. I told her how we needed the numbers against those three witches if we wanted to win. We needed more than just the numbers.. We needed the strength.. The kind that perhaps only uniting together could provide.

I took Lana to the house so that all of us could talk. She said she had little time, but I needed her to hear it all out. I needed her to be ready for whatever it was that was waiting for us.. Gods, I needed her close for just a bit..

And now I observed how she listened.. How carefully she followed every word Calliope explained, and how she suggested things I perhaps could've never even thought of.

"I'm going in there alone. That will allure Adam if he's somewhat awake and then you guys take your part." Amelia added and I found myself pushing back the urge to interrupt and object, because damn me, but I could not accept any of them roaming around that hell hole alone..

I glanced at my brother and he seemed very much in the same state as me.. But he kept quiet. I don't know what Amelia did to convince him on such things.. How she managed to make him agree to let her go in there alone.. But if it was up to me, I would rather lock them somewhere safe and finish it all myself.

  I noticed Lana glancing at me, and I could tell how well she read me. She knew exactly how disapproving I would be of that plan.. And perhaps she wondered why I wanted her to hear it out.

  But it was the only plan we had, and I could not object or have my say in Dimitri's decision on allowing Amelia to do half the job alone in the house.. It was left to hope they knew what they were doing, and it was left to me to look after Lana and Lana only.

  She read me well, however. "From what I've been told, the last time you entered that house, you did exactly that.. Allured Adam and put him down yourself." Lana spoke with that melodic certainty that showed the usual confidence in her words, and I found myself wondering what she was up to.

"And it worked." Amelia's response however didn't seem to convince her much.

  She walked slowly, rounding the leather armchair towards the cracking flames of the fireplace, presenting that grace with each step she took, that assurance in her words showed by a risen chin.. And intelligence in her eyes I had always admired, but feared as well. When she stopped before the fireplace, I saw exactly how she followed each flame that rose, almost as if she was trying to read it.

  "I believe it did, I just don't think Adam might fall for the same trap." She glanced back at Amelia. "He's been in that house for what, two years, if I'm not mistaken.. Are you even aware how long that is? He had time to think about killing each and every one of us in hundreds of different ways.. And he probably repeated that plan in his head at least a thousand times.."

  The patience in her voice was clear.. Her words thought-through. But what I longed to hear was her suggestion. I knew she had many on her mind. Lana was living for a good victory. It was in her blood. It was her way of expressing. And it was all crystal clear behind those eyes.

  "He'll be careful now. He won't fall for that." There was no argue against Lana's words. She was right. And perhaps I had always been aware of what she claimed as well, I just hoped for the best.

  Amelia sat down with a sigh of disappointment. "There is no better option."

"Of course there is." A clear correction with certainty no one could argue. She glanced at me and kept quiet for a few seconds.. "I've never met that monster, and I would so gladly wish to speak to him alone.. I am the one he played mind games with last night, after all.."

And as she spoke out those words, I was left staring at her in disbelief. Perhaps my ears had failed me.. Perhaps she had lost her mind as well.. And damn me, but I struggled to allow my mind process it.

Never was I allowing her to roam around those woods again alone, and certainly not to pass those doors of hell and enter her own doom. No, not even over my dead body.

"No way." Was all there was to be said, and instead of questioning me further by parting her lips and walking towards me, she should've kept her silence and listened.. Because damn me, but I was weak on her closeness.

"Christian-"

"I said no way. End of discussion." I downed my drink and instead of fearing to get near, she made it very much clear how little she cared of my outburst. "You're not going in there alone."

Pressing her palms against my chest so softly and gracefully, I thought I would fall to my knees and worship her all right then, but I managed to rather focus on my frustration from that outrageous suggestion of hers..

"Who said anything about going there alone?" She started her convincing, not caring about what her touch was doing to me in a room full of people. "I have an army of a pack to keep my back.. I can have the Vesntesovs on my side too." She nodded her head almost as if she was assuring herself. "That's the kind of numbers we need."

With a simple step back, she turned around and walked back to the fireplace, kneeling down and throwing the flower of nothing other than wolfsbane she had took from near the house.. The flames costumed it and she seemed once again very much convinced in her own words. She turned around and confirmed her own words..

"And once Adam is well frightened and distracted, and the witches a bit bloody as well.. Perhaps that's when you guys come in with a spell to knock him out."

"I'm very close to figuring out the spell for killing him." Calliope seemed to agree and I could tell that the others did too. "I'll need a day.. Two max."

"Okay, good." And to that.. Oh there was much to say.

"It's not good. I still haven't agreed to any of it." The disproval in my voice was clear, but I still couldn't quite control the fury that that new plan caused.

Of course Dimitri would agree. He just wanted Amelia safe.. And so did I, but I was not willing to put anyone on display like that, let alone the woman that I loved.. Army or not, I was the only one that could keep her safe. With her, I trusted myself only, and so should she..

"If you come with me, Adam will instantly rise his forces against us.. And our point is to trick him, is it not?" I walked towards her with the need to give some piece of my mind about that, but Lana was quick to offer me the kind of smile that I could never really resist. "You can wait for a sign, somewhere near."

I stared at her for a few seconds.. What was I to say? Lana was hard to convince once she had something on her mind. She had the kind of charm and compulsion over me that so easily made me agree to anything she said..

  Just like she did when she wanted to include her family in all of it.. Just like she did with everything else.. All it took her was a simple flatter of those lashes, a smile or a damn touch to have me agree to whatever she said..

  This however was dangerous. If she thought I was going to allow her to risk her life like that, she was very much mistaken. I was not ready to have her out of my sight after what happened that previous night, let alone let her enter that hellhole alone.

  And the look behind those greens was provoking me to the fullest.. She was- goodness, she was daring me beyond belief. She knew how little resistance I had for her when it came to arguments..

I had told her how much she caused inside me at such moments, how little control I had around her whenever she showed such certainty and braveness.. I saw the raw her and damn me, but I wanted to lift her over my shoulder and carry her to my room right then.

"We'll discuss this later." Were the only sane words I found in that moment, hoping she would drop that damn subject before she dared me further.. I knew she could read me well, or perhaps simply understand me from my tone..

"Fine.." I heard her release a slight sigh and those wide eyes kept locked on mine until she decided to turn to Calliope and change the subject. "Are you sure you'll figure out the spell so quickly?"

"Positive. There's no specific spell, that's why it took so long.. I have to mix it up myself and I'm not so sure it will all go so well.."

"You'll do fine.." Lana added a slow caress over Calliope's arm as a support, and I was still very much frustrated that she seemed to act like she completely ignored my words when I told her to discuss it later. Her glance towards me was plain and clearly almost as annoyed with me as I was with her after she announced that stupid plan. "I should go now.. Before the guards grow suspicious."

Amelia walked up and I could very much see that same worried expression reflected on her face as it was on mine, almost as if she knew just how stubborn Lana could get. She aware that magic had to be fought with magic and not an army of werewolves. But then again, I suppose women had more patience with one another, as for the rub Amelia preformed over Lana's back seemed almost supportive..

"I'll walk you out." I walked behind the girls, focusing on figuring out ways to explain to Lana just in how great of a danger she would be putting herself through if she provided that plan of hers.. I was the one driving her home, so we had quite some time to discuss that ridiculous plan she seemed so certain to go through with.

"This house is still sealed, right?" It was Lana's question that showed that concern this time, and I could tell that she had started putting my safety before her own..

"It is.." Amelia answered, crossing her arms and observing how Lana reached for her jacket and started putting it on..

I glanced at Dimitri just to find him leaning his elbows on his knees as he sat, and looking at me the very same second, with that almost furious expression caused by clear worry.. It made me wonder, what in the world happened that now we couldn't even handle two women in our lives?

"Lana," Amelia called after her, and I looked back just to see the two of them talking, how Lana pulled out her hair from her jacket and moved closer to Amelia to hear what she was about to say. "Think this through, please.. Be aware that only magic can compete with magic.. And if those witches had grown more powerful, they'll be able to put you and your whole pack down in seconds.."

"I know what I'm doing." Oh, no you don't.. I wanted to interrupt, but kept my silence and took my own coat. I could hear how they continued, and I was curious to see if Lana would bring up the previous night about Amelia meeting their father.. "How are you holding up?"

Lana's worry was genuine and once again proved just how damn good of a heart she had.. I liked the idea of the two of them growing closer.. Fate had torn them apart. Still, it was frightening to think just how many dangerous plans could be brought up if two such powerful women put their minds together. Both Morphers and both damn fearless when it came to protecting those they loved. I refused to think it all through.

"There's been a lot of things in my life I've had to accept and adjust to.. This is just one of them."

"There's a lot you and I need to discuss.." I turned around as I put my coat on, just to see how Amelia nodded her head at Lana's statement. They had plenty to discuss.. And Lana's slow sigh seemed to be a result of those exact thoughts. "I hope this ends soon."

"As do I.." The two of them seemed to had found an understanding, and as Lana glanced at me, I could finally see that other than having a similar sense in coming up with plans, they didn't have much in common..

While Amelia was softer, quieter and rather silent when she disapproved, Lana was feisty, sharp and full of edge in every move she took. She had certainty in her posture, the kind of confidence that perhaps sometimes resulted with stubborness.. Her eyes were wildly clear, noticing and figuring out things quicker than perhaps any of us could..

And she had no clue just how beautiful that made her, and just how damn much she urged my resistance in that moment, when she looked at me the way she did. I did managed to only clench my jaw and not do much other than to caress her back to let her know it was time to go before I told her things that were supposed to be told in front of others..

"Let's go." To that she mumbled a quiet 'mhm' and as the two of them said their goodbyes, I only managed to tell Amelia to lock the doors behind me, and finally allow the cold air to fill my lungs, because damn me, but around Lana I could simply not clear my head.

We walked towards the car in silence, and I was thankful she didn't further dare my resistance, because the simplest word from her could have me perhaps never allow her to leave again.

I tried not focusing on the plan she suggested before we left, because I would have to once again explain my disapproval to her.. And to that, I was very much certain she would replay with that feisty attitude of hers that would snap my control within seconds..

And just when I thought she had found some understanding as well, the second I walked over to open the door for her, she dared to bring up that exact subject I tried avoiding to escape that loss of resistance inside me.. A very thin rope was holding me in control and she seemed determined to make me let go of it.

"You're being unreasonable." She dared say, and I thankfully first found myself in shock rather in a loss of senses.. The harshness in her tone made me stop near the car and speak in full surprise.

"I'm being unreasonable?" I really wasn't sure if I heard her right. I thought, she sure can read me enough not to dare me further, but dammit, was I wrong..

"You know there's no better way." She even looked at me in frustration and then glanced away, deciding to focus on her own angry tone rather than to try to notice mine.. And that simple statement was what broke every bit of control I was holding onto.

In such moments, frustration moved me and senselessness prevented me from snapping out of that frenzy of thoughts.. That compulsion that her simple scent caused upon me when I pushed her against the car and trapped her so that she would fucking look at me without me having to shout at her to.

The darkness of the late night was thick, but the moonlight illuminated her so damn perfectly that for a moment there, I found myself speechless. Those wild eyes held the darkest forest green color that was once azure, and dammit, I wished those eyes could at least once decide a color that wouldn't provoke me..

She didn't even blink when I pinned her against the car.. Not a flinch nor any other sign of her being startled from my thoughtless quick moves. The heat of her trapped body was ridiculously soothing in such unfortunate situations, and the frown on her face was what made me stare breathlessly at just how perfect her raw braveness was.. Lost in all that beauty even when I was damn furious with her suggestions.

"You know very damn well that I'm willing to do anything for you, Lana.. But do not ever think that I will allow you to risk your life in any way." When she focused on my lips rather than my harsh whispers, I found myself lost.. I found myself fucking thoughtless on what I was saying in that moment.

Her breaths were rather deep from frustration, causing white clouds form from her warm breath against the cold air.. Escaping those ruby red lips that parted in a way that had me focusing on nothing else but her closeness, and the damn necessity to simply cross that little space between the two of us.

And when those daring eyes looked back at mine, I found myself looking back yet only feeling how her chest rose against mine with every heavy breath she took, and how my own urges controlled me rather than my sanity did.. I had moved closer and withing seconds felt those warm lips against my own, fucking lost in their softness..

The promising kiss she returned swirled my damned mind, and in that moment I could not believe how I managed to keep any distance from her for what seemed like hours since she suggested that plan of bravery.. Goodness, the things she made me feel was mad, always so surprisingly unreal to me, because I found myself kissing her like she was the air that filled my lungs and rather the oxygen that promised my very salvation.

I stopped only because I knew if I continued, I would worship her for hours, days even, when I knew just how damn big of a risk it was a simple sign of affection outside that sealed lake house we just left. I could not let go yet, however..

I realized just how close I held her with one hand, and just how much I trapped her with the other against the car.. I realized I could not allow myself to make any distance as for I could not get enough of those warm breaths against my own, and those lustful eyes that stared back at mine with the kind of urgency and armor that was well reflected back on mine.

Perhaps clenching my fist against the car didn't do much of an effect over me as I hoped it would, nor did it make me cause some distance.. But I did find my voice when I leaned my forehead against hers, and I did hear the shaky breath that escaped her when I spoke.

"I'm not losing you." Those eyes closed and I felt her tighten her fingers against my hair.

I was fucking overwhelmed by the sight of her, and that beauty made me wicked in ways I had no clue existed.. It made me so damn ready to do anything for her, and she could never even guess just how much that was..

I felt her shake her head. "It's not just about me."

I watched those eyes flatter open and felt how her hands slid down my chest. I took her wrists, those delicate palms in mine, and felt her instantly preform that familiar caressing as our fingers intertwined.. How she played with her fingers in mine and looked down for a second.. The quickness in her caresses showed that exact nervousness, that kind of uncertainty she didn't allow many people see..

"Amelia has a daughter waiting for her at home." She looked back up at me, and I found myself well aware of her words, agreeing with them, but very much surprised Lana even thought of such things. "I won't allow her to risk her life either."

I always knew.. I knew how much goodness this girl had inside her.. Just how great her generosity was because damn me, but if she could accept me despite all my sins, she was exactly the only light in that world of pitch darkness.. That very spark of fire to my coldness.. Hell, she couldn't even imagine just how damn much I was in love with her.

"You're-" My eyes closed on their own because I could not bare the pureness behind those eyes that caused a whole war in my mind.. "Christ, you're too good."

I pulled her against her waist just to have her as close to me as physically possible. Those daring lips brushed against my own and even with closed eyes I could feel ever bit of their perfection.. Determined to make me lose my mind with the feel of them against my own..

A quick kiss was not enough but it was still the very intoxication my soul longed for, well aware that I would be left addicted and desperate if I pulled away.. But I still did.. I still had to look back at those wild greens that would sooth me better than anything else ever could..

"You're too pure to understand any of this.. Too innocent." I could repeat and say things for hours, but how could I focus on my own words when she did all those little things that swirled my mind? Caressing my nose with hers and leaning closer.. Having me desperate to promise her eternity of my love for her. "I will protect that with my life.."

I pulled her closer.. I- goodness, I could not get enough.. Looking back at those eyes, I was once again assured I could get damn lost on the emotions behind them for hours..

"It'll be all over soon." She nodded her head almost as if she agreed it would, but still, I doubt she even knew how determined I was to release her from all those problems. "I promise you."

~

  Lana's POV

  It was not really possible to make him understand unless I had ways to prove to him.. Prove that after what happened the previous night, I was planning that man's ruin as well.. Adam not only put my life in danger, but the lives to those I loved more than I did myself. Death is what he kept so desperately seeking for.. And death was awaiting him.

  Not even fully alive yet very much the monster no one could find upon the living. He wanderer around the shadows and darks because that's the kind of coward he was.. He slyly played mind games, hiding behind those three witches yet so easily showed despair of how much vengeance he was seeking..

I had Christian by my side.. Overprotective, yes, but still, very much there for my support. And it was all I needed. If it were him and I only into it, then so be it. I was ready to end those that dared to even think about hurting some of my own.. Together, with him. That's all that was needed.

I wished that the world would know.. The reaction when the world finds out.. My very salvation in every way.. Christian Le Bouriser. And who would think that I, Khan's daughter would ever dare to break the golden rule? To not only work with the vampires, but to lay with one.. To love one..

It could mean death. For both of us.. And I was aware of that possibility. Yet I promised.. I promised there would be no such secret no more. Us would no longer be a secret, even if it meant running.. Goodness, I was ready to die for him. How could I ever even doubt it? I loved him. That's the only truth I knew of. I loved him so damn much, it was insanity.

But I had to go back.. One last time.. One last time saying goodbye and never again. I went back home so I could sort things out. Ruin Adam for once and tell my secret to my father.. Tell him that yes it was perhaps lust that pushed me in the arms of a Le Bouriser.. But it was love that made me run back whenever something happened.

I sneaked back to my room through the window, walking in the dark and releasing a sigh of relief that I managed to make it out and back without getting caught.. However, a sound of someone clearing their throat did catch my attention.. I found myself taking a startled step back, noticing the figure that sat on the fluffy armchair..

  The light came switched on, and I was just then aware that my heart had stopped dead in my chest until it continued rapidly almost in my throat. Jack.. God, he-.. he scared the life out of me..

  Staring back at him, I stood with my hand against my chest to at least somewhat calm my rapid heart.. I closed my eyes and took a small step back, still startled by the idea how he sat there and said nothing.. In the middle of the night.. And to think that it was me that caught him and Marco sneaking in and out to race one another in the middle of the night.. My brother had grown and used it now against me.

  "Goodness, Jack,"

  "You went to see him, didn't you?" His voice was clear and deep as it filled the silence.. I stood straight and quiet as I glanced back at him in shock.. "Christian Le Boursier.." How did he.. I couldn't wrap my head around how he guessed that.. "You're sneaking out to meet with him.."

  His words had me speechless.. What was I to say? I was supposed to announce it all to father after we defeated Adam. That was what Christian and I decided that night. Yet my lack of sneaking skills gave me away..

  I found myself releasing a deep breath.. I was not lying. Not now.. Not when I promised I would end that hiding. I had to end it. At least to my brothers. They didn't deserve being lied in their faces.

  "How did you know?" My voice came out quieter than I intended, but clear enough to make him close his eyes in frustration, as if my confirmation had angered him..

  "He saved you, before we got there.. Not to prove father's loyalty, was it?" Pressing his fingers over his eyelids, he leaned his elbows and his knees before continuing almost calmly.. "When he was holding you, I saw how soothed you were.. You passed out because you finally relaxed.. In his arms. And he.." He stopped, glancing at me. "The fear in his eyes.. He looked at you like you were the only thing that mattered to him."

I found some kind of heaviness against my chest as he spoke about that previous night.. I still stood frozen on the same spot and said nothing.. No confirmation or a denial.. I wanted to see how noticeable it was.. Me and Christian.. Was it really right there for everyone to see?

   Jack shook his head slightly. "He didn't want to give you to me.. He was hesitating."

I found myself nervously putting a strand of hair behind my ear and glancing on the side once more. I was not so very certain how to explain it to my brother.. To explain to him how I fell in love with a Le Boursier.. Nor did I know what his reaction would be.

  "It's not the first time he saved me." I found myself admitting, pressing my lips together to keep myself from saying something further and watching him sit up and take a step closer..

  "You weren't kidnapped, were you?"

  "No." And that was the moment I saw that realization behind his eyes.. That's when I saw how he closed his eyes and clenched his teeth, showing just the reaction of frustration and loss of words I was supposed to expect..

  "God," He rubbed his face with his palms, and I found myself sitting back on the window bench almost as if my legs could no longer hold me.. "What- what are you trying to do, Lana? Please tell me, tell me you have a plan, tell me it's just some wicked game you came up with, just-" He was starting to shout almost and I had to stop him..

  So I interrupted. "I love him." I said. Goodness, did I really think this through? "It's not a game." And that was when he lost his patience..

  "You ran from Alexander! In his arms?!"

I closed my eyes, hoping his outbursts didn't wake anyone.. Running my hands through my hair, I seemed to seek some ease from the pressure over my head that was certainly holding me somewhat trapped in that moment..

  "I do not need you to judge or assume right now, Jack. Dad will do that for you plenty when he finds out." I looked back at him. "Alexander is not the man he presents himself as.. He's the one that threatened me, not Christian.."

  Jack now walked towards me in seemingly a rush, kneeling before me and taking my hands in his.

  "What did he do to you? Is it a mind-compulsion.. A spell?" I found myself struggling with my breath in my throat.. I shook my head and tried caressing his hands with my thumbs, but at my denial, he once again  looked on the side and closed his eyes.. "Christ, dad will kill both of you.."

  "He will if you keep shouting."

  "Answer me." I didn't know he was still expecting an answer for that.. I really didn't know how to explain it to him.. He would had never been able to understand.

  So I pulled on his hands letting him know he should stop kneeling, having him sit beside me where I could look at him well and perhaps read his expression. He was worried.. Panicked even.. And to think what my father would do.. God, it sent chills throughout my entire body.

  "He didn't do a spell on me. It doesn't work like that, Jack." I spoke calmly, or at least tried to.. Perhaps to somewhat calm myself as well.. "Witches are not all cruel.. Spells are not only dark magic.. Vampires are not monsters.." I gulped down.. "Not all of them."

  I suppose that was somewhat of a start.. But I still.. Oh I still had no clue how to explain the things I felt for Christian. Perhaps there were no words to explain really.. How was I to put it into mere words when I couldn't even explain it to myself at the beginning?

  "Then what happened?" He pulled his hands away from mine and I ran out of attempts to calm him..

  He was very much certain he would see his sister dead soon because of it.. But I could swear to him he wouldn't. Not when it was all the realest thing I had ever felt.. Not for my love for Christian.

So with a sigh, I started from the beginning.. "It all started that day of the holiday celebration.. More correctly, the night I ran away.."

***

  Oh well, the big little secret is no longer so secretive..

  Tell me what you think about Jack knowing.. Will he tell? Or perhaps approve of this impossible love?

  Also, to address this long delay, I'll start by saying a big sorry to you all for having to wait for this update for so long.. I usually wait for the chapter to reach a certain amount of views and votes before I start the next one, but this time, I simply found myself in a lack of inspiration and could not get myself to think this plot straight..

  I do have some news for y'all that I'll thankfully announce soon, so that will maybe clear my slight absence (;

  Comment and vote on this one to let me know your theories about perhaps Adam's doom? Do y'all approve of this plan? Or is Amelia's a safer choice?

  Kisses, babes 😘