The moment we were past the Grayson fence line and in the safety of the woods beyond the city, Ruby and I climbed on Pearl's back and she galloped into the forest. I glanced back every few seconds, but then I finally accepted that no one was following us. I let out a deep breath- we had done it. We were safely outside of Grayson's border.

We rode for several hours without stopping, trying to put as much distance between us and the city as possible, but the journey was difficult. The terrain was thick with underbrush and had an intense incline that we weren't used to. Several times we had to stop and let Pearl rest, giving her water from our already scarce canteens.

It wasn't an easy journey, but we had committed to building a life out here, so we had no choice but to keep moving forward and hope that things would become easier the further we traveled. We were willing to endure the physical discomfort it if it meant finding freedom.

As dawn approached, we got the first good luck at the forest. After a lifetime of hearing the stories about the dead zone beyond Grayson and the horrors of radiation, I hadn't expected things to look so... normal. The thick trees that were visible from Grayson's square surrounded us. Bushes grew in thickets, filled with berries and flowers, and thick tree trunks were barely visible beneath layers of deep green moss. It eased some of my anxiety to know that the things they'd been telling us were wrong all along, that there was signs of life beyond the safe confines of Grayson.

By the time the sun was beginning to lighten the sky beyond the distant mountains, we were all exhausted.

"We should get some sleep. The baby needs to nurse, and it's more dangerous to travel during the day anyway," Ruby suggested, readjusting a fussy Gracie in her carrier.

I nodded, my eyelids drooping. We climbed from Pearl's back and began looking for some sort of shelter where we could rest. It was another several minutes before we found a large rock overhang that backed up to a clump of evergreen trees, leaving an opening on only one side. It was spacious inside, large enough even for Pearl to reside in comfortably, and kept out some of the summer heat that was already tangible in the early hours of dawn.

I tied Pearl's reigns to one of the trees and gave her the last of the water we'd brought from Grayson. Ruby read the anxiety on my face and gave me a comforting squeeze on my shoulder.

"It's okay," she said. "I think I saw a stream about half a mile back. Stay here with Gracie, and I'll go get us a refill."

"Ruby," I said, grabbing her arm. "You're still recovering. And we need to stick together."

She shook her head. "No, we need to keep Gracie safe. That was our goal all along, and the safest place for her right now is this cavern with you. I need to stretch my legs anyway- riding Pearl so long has made my limbs stiff. I'll be okay," she said with a reassuring smile. "I promise."

I nodded and let her go, feeling like a piece of my heart was being ripped apart as she made her way through the forest alone.

***************

By the time Ruby made it back to our camp with two canteens full of water, I had fashioned the limbs of nearby trees into a makeshift wall that hid our cavern from any curious eyes, while also allowing us to see into the forest beyond our camp.

Ruby gave me a canteen and I took a swig of the cool water. Then she went to Gracie, who gulped the water down happily, drinking half of the canteen in one sitting. Then we laid back and rested our weary bodies.

"I'll keep watch," I told Ruby. "You need sleep more than I do right now."

She didn't argue, but curled up with Gracie on the makeshift bed on the cave's floor. Within seconds, the sound of their soft snores filled the cave.

I was exhausted, but adrenaline kept me awake. For a while I watched the forest meticulously, searching for signs of a hunting party or Guardians with a vendetta to set right. But there was nothing in the forest except us, the trees, and the occasional bird or two.

The forest was peaceful, and for the first time in twenty years, I felt myself beginning to relax. The permanent tension in my shoulders faded away, and I even dared to let myself smile at the idea of living in this magical world where I didn't have to be fearful of persecution from our husbands or an overbearing government. This was so much more than I could have hoped for. Why the Grayson officials wouldn't allow us beyond the city was astonishing when there was so much potential out here. There was fresh water, vegetation, even apples and cherries growing from the thick clusters of trees. It was like a scene from the Garden of Eden. I was glad Ruby had convinced me to go.

A few hours later, Ruby begins to stir. She gently lifted Gracie's head from her arm and let her continue sleeping before tiptoeing to the cave entrance to sit by my side.

"It's something, isn't it?" she said with a smile. The nap had done her wonders. The color had returned to her cheeks, and her hair was already looking less dull.

"It is," I said, resting my head on her shoulder. "It feels like I'm home for the first time."

Ruby nodded. "Home. I like the sound of that," she said, kissing my forehead. "There is where we will build our house," she said pointing to a small clearing to the side of the cavern. "It will be a little stone cottage, just big enough for the three of us. We'll have a garden in the backyard where we can grow vegetables for stews and salads, and in a few years, maybe even an orchard for juice and jams.

"When she's older, we'll teach Gracie to swim in the creek. She'll learn how to catch fish and tend the garden, how to be independent and fend for herself with no one else's help. She'll grow up knowing happiness and true freedom, like a little wood nymph with flower crowns and gowns made of leaves."

I laughed at the image in my mind. What Ruby painted was a beautiful picture, one that I could have only dreamed of when we first met. I loved the idea of the life we could make together.

For a few days, things were blissful. We stayed in our little cavern, eating berries and fish, laughing and playing, only riding Pearl through the forest for exercise and fun. But our dreams of building a home and future together were short-lived.

Early one morning, Gracie woke up fussy. I picked her up and rocked her for a while, trying to get her back to sleep, but she refused to settle. That's when I noticed that her cheeks were flushed and she was hot to the touch. For a while, I didn't think much of it. Gracie had been teething, so fussiness and fever weren't uncommon. But as the morning progressed, she went from just a little warm to burning up.

By that time, I was in a panic and woke up Ruby. She ripped a piece of cloth from her gown and wet it in the cool stream, placing the damp cloth on Gracie's forehead, but hours later, the cool cloth still wasn't helping. By then she was refusing to nurse and no matter what we tried, her fever wouldn't break. We stayed up with her all night, and that was when the sickness began. For hours she alternated between retching and screaming. Between being sick and unable to eat, I watched helplessly as she was drifting away before my eyes.

"What's wrong with her?" I murmured, brushing her sweaty hair from her forehead. She had finally fallen asleep, but her breathing was hoarse and shallow, another indication that we were losing her. A tear slipped down my cheek, at a loss of how to help our baby.

"I think its radiation poisoning," Ruby said gravely.

"What?" I asked, shocked. "How? Everything here is perfect, like a piece of heaven on Earth. How could she get sick when the trees and animals here are fine?"

Ruby shrugged. "I guess they've learned to adapt to these levels of radiation. Our bodies aren't used to the radioactivity, so we're going to be more affected."

"What if it's just a normal illness, like the flu?"

Ruby shook her head. "You know it's not the flu. Look at her, Mia. She's fading away," she said, indicating the small, pale infant wheezing pitifully on the cave floor.

The Grayson officials had been right all along- the land beyond the border really was poison beyond livable to those of us who hadn't been exposed to the radiation.

"But you and I are fine, though," I said, gesturing between us. I still couldn't grasp the idea.

"Gracie is a lot smaller than us and has a more susceptible to illness than we are," Ruby continued. "If we stayed in the forest long enough, we would show symptoms too. Off course, by then, Gracie would probably be beyond helping."

A chill went up and down my spine at her words. It felt like someone was stabbing me in the chest. It hurt to know that in trying to build a better life for Gracie, we were really just putting her in harm's way.

Ruby's eyes hardened. "We have to turn back, Mia."

"I know," I said, rubbing the red "X" on her cheek.

I let out a deep sigh. We had been so close to freedom, so close to being able to live the life we had always wanted, without the Guardians or our abusive husbands breathing down our necks. Now, in the blink of an eye, it was being snatched from our grasp.

Ruby and I stared at one another for a moment. We knew what would happen if we went back to Grayson. We would die and Gracie would be put in the orphanage. I remembered the sad faces of those kids walking through town, their pain radiating from them like a contagious disease. I felt a pang of guilt as I pictured Gracie's little face filled with that pain.

As much as I didn't want me or Ruby to die, as much as I didn't want Gracie to become an orphan, what other choice did we have? If we did nothing, she would die from radiation. Though it wasn't easy to pick up and walk toward our deaths, the answer was obvious- we would do whatever it took to make sure Gracie was okay.

***************

Before the day was over, we had packed our bag and were on Pearl's back, making our way back to Grayson, back to the place that was our prison, leaving the forested wonderland and all of the dreams of the life we could have built there behind us. The journey back to Grayson felt like it took ten times longer than when we left. Seeing Gracie slipping away little by little made it seem like we would never make it there in time.

We were about halfway back when the lesions formed on Gracie's arms and face. By that time, we knew we were in trouble. I flicked Pearl's reigns, willing her to move faster, praying we weren't already too late.

When we were close enough to Grayson that we could see the city's lights, we climbed from Pearl's back and made our way toward the border. My heart hammered in my chest; it was unnatural to know how you would die and walk toward it anyway. But I knew we were doing what was best for Gracie. If we wanted to save her, we had no choice but to return. We would be killed, but if it saved her life, it would be worth it.

"Are you ready?" Ruby asked, reminding me of a similar conversation long ago with Charlotte.

"Ready as I'll ever be," I murmured, suppressing a sigh.

Just like the day I was walking to my Awakening Ceremony felt like my life was ending, I knew as I made my way toward the city that today was the day that it really would be.

I gave Gracie one final kiss goodbye, brushing her dark curls from her sleeping face. Then I intertwined my hand with Ruby's, and with one final embrace, we entered the area just beyond Grayson.

Bright lights blinded us, and within moments, guards are yelling at us to get to our knees. We complied, kneeling on the ground as we awaited our fate.

"I love you," I murmured to Ruby as a group of Guardians made their way toward us.

"And I love you," she said. "No matter what my future holds, everything that happened between us was worth it. I wouldn't change what has happened for the world."

Before I could respond, I felt a small pinch in my neck as a dart stuckmy neck. Ruby's smile was the last thing I saw before a Guardian knocked meunconscious