When I woke up the following morning, the sun was beginning to rise above the horizon. It was still freezing and I could barely feel my fingers and toes, but the sun's warmth brought a sense of renewal into my heart. I had made it through James' trial. I had beaten him at his sick game, and that gave me hope that things could only get better from there.

The door to the kitchen opened and Ruby appeared, her face contorted with worry. "Mr. Moberly would like you to come inside now," she said with a small bow.

I nodded and climbed onto my numb and shaking legs, making my way slowly into the house, grateful when I crossed the threshold and the warmth of the fireplace hit me. Ruby met me at the door and helped me into a thick, cozy robe. I fought the urge to clasp the wool fabric tightly around myself, never more appreciative of warm clothes.

James sat at the kitchen counter, drinking a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. "Good morning, darling. You look well rested," he smirked.

Ruby gave an apologetic smile as she handed me a mug of coffee. I wrapped my hands around it appreciatively, trying to absorb the warmth like a sponge. I did not respond. If James wanted to get a rise out of me, it was not the time to do so. Not when I was so tired.

I stifled a yawn. He was right of course- I could only imagine how exhausted I looked. Each time I managed to dose off, I was jarred awake by some mysterious sound in the darkness or by a random surge of cold brought on by a shift in the wind. Each time I woke up, Ruby was standing in her window, sending her love and warmth to me until I somehow managed to go back to sleep. She must be even more tired than I was.

James and I sat in silence as we ate our pancakes and sipped the warm coffee. When he finished his food, he gestured for Ruby to bring him a drink. The putrid vapor of the spirits made my stomach churn, and I couldn't fathom how James could stomach such a strong drink this early in the morning. After taking a swig of the drink, he turned to look at me.

"I get no pleasure in punishing you, Mia."

Could have fooled me, I thought, thinking back to the satisfied smirk on his face as he locked me out of the house with no clothes.

"You have no idea the amount of pressure that I'm under at work. As the Director of Population Regrowth, my sole job is to promote procreation and help repopulate the Earth. Yet, here I sit, nearly a year after my binding and I still have no children of my own," he said, shaking his head. "If this continues, it won't be long before my job is in jeopardy. If that happens, this house, the hired help, and all of the nice things you've become accustomed to will be gone. We will be thrown into poverty, and I refuse to live my life like that," he said getting to his feet. His tall frame towered dauntingly over me.

"It's no secret that the only reason I took you as a wife was because I'm expected to father children. It is your sole purpose as my wife to give me children, and no matter how often you share my bed, or how often I punish you, you are unable to conceive. If that's the case, I really have no use for you, do I?" he asked,

My heart dropped into my stomach. "What are you saying, James?"

He took another drink of the liquor, glancing to the floor to avoid my gaze. "I'm saying that if you are not able to provide me with a child by the year's end, I will have to put you out and find another wife who can."

***************

I stared after James as he left the kitchen and walked out the front door, heading to the job he valued so much he would choose it over his own wife. Though I had suspected James might do something irrational like this, it didn't lessen the sense of morbidity I felt at hearing him say it aloud.

A little over one month. That's how long I had to complete an impossible task. One month to become pregnant by a man I hated. One month left of freedom before James figured out why I wasn't able to give him a child and I was sent to the Factories, deemed a No Name woman.

I let out a shaky breath. Ruby watched me with worried eyes, having heard the entire conversation.

"What am I supposed to do?" I asked, my voice deadened.

"Now," she said, taking my hand in hers. "You take a bath and get some sleep. Stop worrying about what Mr. Moberly said. There's nothing you can do about it right now."

I nodded and followed her up the stairs, my legs numb from cold and James' formidable ultimatum. Ruby drew a warm bath and threw sprigs of lavender and rose petals into the water. I unwrapped my robe and stepped into the porcelain tub, the hot water feeling like pinpricks across my frozen skin.

Ruby began pouring the hot water over my skin and hair. I closed my eyes and allowed the warmth to relax my tensed muscles, washing away the cold from the previous night and the coolness from James' threat.

Once I had toweled off and Ruby had combed through my long, dark hair, she helped me into my thickest nightgown. I laid in bed and she piled layer after layer of quilts over my body until I was finally warm.

Ruby leaned down and kissed my forehead. "Sweet dreams, Mia."

She turned to leave, but I reached beneath the blankets and grabbed her hand. "Stay," I asked, my voice nearly a plea.

Ruby's forehead creased, and she gave a curt nod. I scooted over to make room for her in my bed. I wrapped my arms around her and leaned my head on her chest, letting the stress of the morning wash over me until I was crying into Ruby's shirt.

"It will be okay," she whispered, kissing the top of my head. "I promise, I will find a way to fix this."

I wanted to ask her what she meant, but before I could, Ruby's lips were on mine. It was a gentle kiss, one filled with desire and all of the unspoken things between us. Her hand slipped beneath the folds of my robe, holding my waist and pressing me to her. Her fingers trailed my stomach, going downward, leaving my skin tingling in their wake. She pulled away to look at me, the question in her burning eyes. I nodded and placed my hands on either side of her face, bringing her lips back to mine. Her fingers touched me in a way that I'd never experienced before, one full of desire and passion rather than fear and hate, pleasing me until I was trembling and my breath came out in huffs.

"I-I love you," she said, caressing my cheek. My eyes widened and my mouth parted slightly, unsure what to say. Ruby gave a small smile, but I could see the pain in her eyes. "It's okay if you don't feel the same way. I just wanted you to know."

I placed my finger under her chin and lifted her face so she was forced to meet my gaze. "I love you, too," I admitted. "I think I always have."

She smiled and laid her head against the crook of my armpit. As we lay in one another arm's a tear slipped down my cheek- if only Ruby could be my partner instead of James. She would never make me feel bad for things I couldn't control or derive pleasure from my pain. She loved me the way someone should love their spouse. I was always meant to be with her, no matter what Grayson said. I had finally found love, and now, in a few short weeks, it would be ripped from my grasp and I would become a distant memory.

***************

I wasn't able to eat or sleep during the next several days as my impregnation deadline loomed in the distance. James called her to his bedroom every night, trying desperately to produce a child, but his efforts were futile. Though Dr. Winthrop said there was a small chance I could still conceive, I knew deep down that it wouldn't happen. I could feel it in my bones that bearing a child wasn't the path my life was meant to take.

At night when I would be forced to lie with my husband, my mind was on Ruby. I couldn't stop my venturing mind from thinking about how different this interaction was compared to what I'd experienced with Ruby, about how much better it had been when she was by my side instead of James. For once I didn't care that it was against the rules. For once, I was thinking about me and what I wanted. And I wanted Ruby, for now and always.

Despite the horror stories Ruby had told me about becoming a No Name woman, the idea didn't really phase me. I couldn't imagine things being more terrifying than some of the injuries I'd inflicted at James' hand. Leaving Ruby behind would be my only regret. A part of me wanted to make this easier on her, to push her away and help ease the pain that she would feel when she was inevitably sent away. But I was too selfish to let her go. I needed her by my side now more than ever before.

There was no denying the days leading up to the deadline had taken a toll on my body. The dark circles that encased my eyes were evidence of my many sleepless nights, the hollowness of my cheeks indicating my lack of appetite. My muscles ached constantly from the tension in my shoulders, and on more than one occasion I had to grab a wall or newel post to steady myself as a sudden bout of dizziness took hold of me.

As the days pass, I became more and more distant, a ghost of a woman, too concerned about what my future may hold to live in the present. Ruby noticed and tried to convince me that somehow, some way, it would all be okay. I smiled, but never replied. I knew deep down that things wouldn't be okay, but I didn't want to force my pessimism onto Ruby when we only had a few weeks left together.

I could see the worry on Ruby's face as she watched me wither away, how her forehead would crease when I stumbled or the hard set of her lips when I had yet another migraine. But she never said a word, choosing to keep her worries to herself rather than inflict more stress on me, giving me space during the day to work through things on my own.

I had nearly resigned to tell James the truth about the cysts on my ovaries, to rip the bandage off and get it over with so I didn't have to continue living in fear of what might happen. I thought about how the conversation would go as I made my way toward James' bedroom that night, about the best way to address the delicate situation without setting James off. Any way I looked at it, the conversation would not go well. James would be offended that I wasted his time, and would fear embarrassment from his colleagues when they heard the truth. More likely than not, he would give me one good thrashing before sending me off. I just hoped he would let me say goodbye to Ruby first.

I stood outside the familiar mahogany doors, wishing I could just go back to my room and sleep instead of dealing with James, but I knew procrastinating wouldn't help matters and would just put James in a foul mood. With a deep sigh, I raised my hand to knock on the door, but before I could tap against the thick wood, the door opened. There, standing in the threshold of James' bedroom, was Ruby, her auburn hair disheveled and the top buttons of her dress undone.

"Mia," she murmured, her cheeks reddening.

"Ruby," I said, furrowing my brows. "What are you doing here?"

She cleared her throat and tried, futilely, to tame her unruly hair. "I was checking to see if Mr. Moberly needed anything before bed."

I glanced over her shoulder, noticing that the bed was unmade, the sheets and bedding thrown to the ground in a rush. James lay on the bed, his torso bare and his trousers unzipped, belligerently drunk to the point of nearly passing out. Anything that occurred tonight would be a back in the morning light, after he'd sobered up.

"Go back to your room, Mia. Mr. Moberly is too inebriated to perform his husbandly duties tonight," she said, her voice firm.

Her bizarre reaction, her untidy appearance, the messy bedroom all flashed in my mind, and it all clicked.

My voice dropped to whisper, barely audible in the empty hallway. "What did you do, Ruby?"

She looked at Jameswith hate-filled eyes and her jaw clenched. "I fixed our problem," she said,closing the door to the master bedroom and heading toward her quarters withoutanother word.