BORN TO DIE    ╱    DRACO MALFOY
꒷꒦ · ˚.‧ . written by ella . . . © -lostgardens
074 ━━━━━━━ ❛ a word of advice ❜

Bound adults. Frightened children. A faceless man. Darkness. Heat. Flames. Fire. It all continued to haunt Olivia in her sleeping mind, her nightmare now being back to what it was before and not about drowning in the Black Lake. Her skin was coated with a cold sweat, and her chest rose and fell rapidly as she tossed and turned about in her bed, clutching onto Mr. Snake in the fold of her arm. She needed to wake up. She had to wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up!

She sat up hastily in her bed, heaving in breaths as she looked around, seeing nothing but darkness. The room was pitch black besides the green tint from the window, and Pansy slept soundly in her bed, her breathing soft and falling from her partly open lips. The clock on the wall read four a.m., and Olivia sighed. Her hands covered her face, then she ran her fingers through her hair. She stayed like that for only a moment before she turned in her bed, letting her legs hang off the side, and put Mr. Snake in her spot. She stood up from the bed and made her way to her wardrobe to grab her robes. It was way too early for classes, but she needed to go.

She needed to get out of the room.

She went to the bathroom quietly, took a quick shower to wash the cold sweat from her, and then got dressed before she brushed her teeth and hair. Then she put on her boots, gathered her bag and wand, and headed out the door, trying not to wake Pansy in the meantime.

Once she was down the stairs and in the common room, she cast Lumos, causing the tip of her wand to glow a blue hue, and made her way to the door. She exited out into the corridors and made her way to Snape's classroom, hoping he wouldn't be sleeping. She was sure he wasn't.

And her certainty was right.

When she came to a stop at the door, she could see an orange glow coming from the bottom, like he had a candle lit on the other side of the wood separating them. He was sitting at his desk as she opened the door, reminding her a lot of the time she'd visited him before in the early hours. He looked up from the assignment he was no doubt marking and found her with tired and slightly narrowed eyes.

She walked over to a chair, dragged it in front of his desk, and then sat down without saying a word. Then she opened her mouth to speak as his hands folded together on his desk, but no sound came out. She closed her mouth again, taking in a breath through her nose as she closed her eyes, trying to calm herself.

"I have these nightmares," she admitted, opening her eyes to find him. "They have happened every night since I can remember. It stopped for a year before I came to Hogwarts, and then two weeks before I got here, they started again and haven't left since." She paused, picking at the skin around her nails. "Most of the time, they're the same, like tonight, but they've been different a few times." She thought back to her nightmare about Lucas and the one about her drowning and Draco not saving her, which were the only two she could remember ever being different from the normal one. "There are these two adults and five children, the eldest child no older than four or five, and the youngest just a baby," she explained, seeing his expression not change in the slightest as he continued to listen. "And the adults are bound to the wall, screaming through their gags. There's a man as well, but he has no face. He kills one of the adults and then taunts the woman as she begs for him not to hurt the children. He calls her and them monsters, saying that it's her fault they're the way they are, whatever that is supposed to mean. Then there's nothing but darkness, and then there's heat, almost like fire. And it's as if I'm seeing it from one of the little girl's perspectives, as if I am her. But that can't be." Her eyes met his as she looked up from where she stared at the floor, having been lost in thought. "It has always felt so real, but tonight was so intense," she added, her eyes flickering between hers. His face was blank, not showing what he was thinking. "I used to not sleep because of them. I would spiral and become somewhat manic due to sleep deprivation, but it was better than the nightmares—better than seeing that faceless man, the terrified children, and the helpless adults. But then one night, I slept again, not being able to help myself, and then they were gone. At least for a little bit. I thought I was better." She breathed out a chuckle, though nothing was amusing. "They're getting bad again, and I don't know if I can hang on any longer if I have to continue to deal with these." Her chin began to wobble with the admission.

Snape remained quiet, just staring at her for a moment that felt like eternity. Then he sucked in a breath, and his eyes fell onto his desk. He unclasped his hands and brought them to the pile of papers. He flipped through them for a moment, stacking them neatly, before he focused back on her and put his hands back in their original position. "Have you tried taking a Dreamless Sleep Potion?" he asked.

She nodded, remembering back to when her mother made Bobbin give it to her after she was attacked at the World Cup.

"And did it work?"

She nodded again.

"Have you told your mother?" was his next question.

Olivia's brows furrowed at this, wondering what she had to do with anything. Of course, she had told her mother! She had told her the night the nightmares returned those couple of weeks before she started at Hogwarts, but she had dismissed her like she was nothing. Like she wasn't her daughter. "Yes, I've told her," she scoffed, "but it's not as if she cares."

"I advise you to start using Dreamless Sleep Potion to ease this," he told her, not debating her words. "I will brew it myself and give you enough to last a month's time this evening." He paused, giving her a look that told her that he wanted to say something else but was contemplating it in his mind. "And I suggest you talk to someone about this regularly. If not me, then someone else, someone you trust."

Olivia hated that only one person came to her mind as her hand subconsciously reached for the charm on her necklace. She dropped her hand and lifted her chin, acting careless. "And when that no longer works, what then?" Her brow quirked.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

After that, she got up from her seat and left.

As she walked through the corridors, she watched as the sun began to rise, changing the dark blue sky into a mixture of oranges, reds, purples, and pinks. She was already dressed in her uniform, but classes and breakfast didn't start for another half hour or so, meaning she had time to waste. But then her name was called behind her, her professor using his usual tone. Turning around, she saw Snape approaching her, clad in his long black robes, looking like he had before. He had something in his hand—something that looked to be a letter as he strutted towards her, his robes flowing behind him.

When he came to a stop in front of her, he lifted up the folded parchment sealed with wax and confirmed her suspicions. "This is from your mother," he told her as she took the letter from him. His hand fell to his side, and then he turned around and walked away without saying another word.

She would never get over how strange of a man he was. Shaking that thought from her head, she focused on the letter, running her thumb along the wax seal with her family's crest dented in it. She took a few steps back, leaning against one of the stone pillars of the wall of the corridor, and peeled open the parchment. Her mother's handwriting came into view, staring back at her almost mockingly. And the words written weren't any better.

Olivia Katherine,
I was quite disappointed in your performance during the second task. I expect better than that from you. I want you to win. Your father and I both want you to win, no matter the cost. We know you want that too—to do our family's name right. Do better. We will be at the final task.

Your Mother,
Clodagh

Turning the letter down as she looked up, Olivia chuckled annoyedly, hating how her mother always felt the need to put pressure on her. She was disappointed in her "performance," as if her only daughter hadn't almost drowned and still managed second place. But anything below first was a loss in Clodagh's eyes. It had always been that way.

Olivia shoved the letter into her bag and pulled herself away from the pillar as she began to wander around the corridors. When she finally decided to head back to the common room, having decided to simply lay back down and go to bed, despite knowing what awaited her if she skipped her lessons, she breathed in and out, trying to keep herself calm. But then she was met with her friends walking towards her. Their eyes landed on her and hers on them, and they all stopped in their tracks.

"There you are!" Pansy said with a smile.

Olivia tried to return the smile, but it was more of a flat line than anything else. "Here I am." She continued forward, with her plan to sleep the day away in her mind. She brushed past them, but before she could get too far, Lucas's hand was on her bicep. She glanced over her shoulder, seeing her brother looking down at her with a concerned look.

"Are you all right, Livvy?" he asked. "You look a little pale."

She softened her features, smirking just slightly. No, she was not fine. "I always look pale," she retorted sarcastically. He gave her a sharp look, making her feel like she was the younger one of the two, and she sighed. "I'm fine, Luke. Truly." She offered a soft smile and then turned to walk away, going to the common room.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

She hadn't ended up skipping classes that day because, when she'd laid down in her bed, closed her eyes, and prepared to sleep, she couldn't fall asleep for the life of her. So, after a while of tossing and turning, she got up and made her way to breakfast, catching the last leg of time to eat before she had to go to her first class that day.

A few days later, she was walking down the corridor, clutching her books to her chest as she made her way to the library. It was the first moment in these last few days that she finally had a moment alone—to think and breathe. It felt like a breath of fresh air. It felt like heaven. She adored her friends and brother, but she needed some time to herself, and that wasn't the time when she was restlessly sleeping. Snape had given her many vials of Dreamless Sleep Potion, like he had said he would, but she hadn't been taking them. She didn't know why, but she didn't want to. She wanted to be rid of them, but she didn't want to have to take a potion for the rest of her life to do so. And the nightmare meant something; she knew that. So how was she supposed to figure out what that "something" was if she didn't have it?

"Olivia!" the voice of a boy called out, and she turned around, wondering who it was. Her eyes landed on none other than Potter, and she furrowed her brows, wondering what he wanted. They hadn't really spoken since he asked her to the Yule Ball, and she assumed that was because she hadn't given him a clear answer to his invitation and ended up going with another boy. But he had gone with another girl, so clearly it hadn't been that big of a deal. "Hey," he breathed out as he stopped in front of her, staring at her from behind the circle glasses.

"Hi," she replied, her tone almost questioningly.

He glanced around awkwardly a few times, seeming to be making sure no one was around. She copied his movements, then focused back on him with a confused gaze. He cleared his throat, bringing his fist in front of his mouth, then dropping it as he fiddled with his hands. "Uh, so, uhm, Hermione and Ron, and me as well, to be honest, don't believe that all of this is a coincidence," he admitted, though he didn't really admit anything.

His words just made Olivia even more confused. "What?" she asked.

"All of it. What happened to Crouch, my scar hurting recently, these dreams that I have been having, and since both of our names were in the Goblet of Fire when they shouldn't have been, it makes me believe that you're connected to this somehow, though I'm not sure how exactly," he explained, more so rambling than anything. "I'm going to go to Dumbledore about all of this; Hermione thinks that best, but I wanted to see if you knew anything of importance before I do so."

Olivia's brows furrowed. "What happened to Crouch?"

Potter seemed surprised by this question, but then his expression settled. "Right, you wouldn't know about it since it's mostly going to be covered up," he mumbled, looking away from her and to the ground. "Well, I was in the forest with Hermione, Ron, and Hagrid after the second task, and I found Crouch... dead. He was murdered... here at Hogwarts."

The look that overtook Olivia's face was nothing but shock. How come she hadn't heard of this? Why didn't her mother tell her? Did her mother even know? And why was Potter so sure it was going to be covered up? She knew that Crouch wasn't everyone's favorite at the Ministry (she didn't even work at the Ministry, and he wasn't her favorite person either), but people had the right to know why he was dead. Surely someone was going to grieve for him.

Her mind ran over Potter's words once more as her eyes shifted over the floor, and then she met his gaze. "Wait," she began. "You have dreams too?"

He nodded. "Yes."

"Are they tiring like mine?" she asked softly, sounding defeated.

He opened his mouth to speak, perhaps to question her about her dreams, but he closed it before anything came out. Then he said, "Quite."

And then Olivia was hugging him, barely even touching him. Her chin rested on his shoulder, and her hands were faint on the tops of his shoulders as he tensed, not hugging her back, as if he didn't know what to do or if he should. "I hope they get better," she muttered to him, then pulled back, looking into his eyes. She raised her hands to the sides of his face, cupping it gently. A soft smile turned at her lips, and he just stared at her with confusion. She wasn't sure what had gotten into her and why she was being nice, but it felt right. "I don't know anything of importance that you could tell Dumbledore that you don't already know; I'm sorry." Her hands fell to her sides as she took a step back.

"That's all right," he replied, then cleared his throat.

He seemed as if he were about to leave, so she said, "Well," and his eyes met her once more. She took a step forward, fiddling with her hands. "You could tell Dumbledore about how I got hit with the killing curse and Crouch wanted to cover it up instead of reporting it," she told him. She actually wasn't sure if he had reported it or not. Her parents had gone in for an "inquiry" at work, but that didn't mean anything. There was no telling who was or wasn't in that meeting. "Just don't tell him that I told you to tell him," she added, tipping her head forward with a teasingly pointed look. She didn't need her mother finding out that she was telling Dumbledore by proxy about what had happened. The woman already didn't like the man, a trait Olivia inherited, and definitely did not want him to know her secrets.

"Okay," was all he said.

She smiled softly again and turned to walk away, with him watching her back.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

"What do you suppose is on Karkaroff's arm?" Ron asked as he and Harry stood on the bridge while Hermione sat. His eyes went from the girl to his other best friend, who took a step forward, looking out at the grounds of Hogwarts.

Harry had seen something the night before, after visiting Dumbledore. Snape and Karkaroff had been having a heated discussion, and he had spotted a mark of some sort on the Bulgarian man's arm, where his sleeve would usually be covering "I don't know," the glasses-wearing boy replied, moving closer to Hermione, still not looking at neither her nor Ron.

"Boomslang skin and lacewing flies?" Hermione repeated her friend's (and Snape's) words from before as she stood up. "Are you sure those two are the ingredients Snape mentioned?" she asked, seeming confused, walking two more steps down the bridge before glancing back at the boys.

"Positive. Why?" Harry looked at her as she turned forward again, taking a few more steps.

"Well, he thinks we're brewing Polyjuice Potion, doesn't he?" She rhetorically asked, looking out at the bright day. Each one of them knew it wouldn't be the first time they did, but the first time was also the last, given Hermione's cat-transformation incident and how disgusting the potion tasted. She leaned herself against the stone archway at the end of the bridge as Harry moved closer to her while Ron stayed back.

Harry took a breath. "I don't care what Snape thinks," he stated, stopping opposite her. His gaze found the grounds of their school, just as hers found him. "We've got bigger problems than detention," he added, stepping down on one of the steps before he sat down. "Something's coming closer. I can feel it." He rubbed his scar, his face slightly twisted in pain, but his eyes remained on what was in front of him, just as a familiar girl with dark hair and soulless eyes, clad in her Slytherin uniform, passed them, accompanied by her white-blonde-haired companion. "I want to check back in with Olivia to see how she's doing and what her dreams are about."

Hermione scoffed, sitting down next to him as Ron approached from behind. "Good luck getting her alone again. She and Malfoy have been attached at the hip ever since he saved her in the Black Lake."

The three of them just watched as one of the topics of their conversation went by, her focus solely on the boy she was with, their shoulders brushing against each other as they laughed at whatever was being talked about between them. Just them. The two of them without anyone else.

The trio was quiet for a moment, just staring at them.

And then Ron said, "I don't see what she sees in him."

Hermione and Harry gave each other odd looks before sending them their friend's way.

He found their gazes. "What?"

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

━━━━ ella's speaking !
this is a bit of a filler chapter but it's still important, and i like have these little scenes between different characters to get a inside look at what's going on yk

also, thank you a bunch for 18K reads!! that's actually crazy, and i couldn't be more grateful for everything 🫶🏻

i have the rest of act four completely written! it just needs to be edited and then it can be published !!!

make sure to comment and vote!

kisses.

━━━━━━━━━━ born to die,
© -LOSTGARDENS,        may 2024

word count: 3335. written: 4.16-23.24. published: 5.5.24.