Two souls don't find each other by accident.
~Pintrest~

Romano

A myriad of emotions went through my mind upon hearing that question, yet none of them were new to me. I have felt anger, fear, and helplessness in the last couple of days that I was beginning to feel as if I might never get them off.

I strode to sit on the couch placed against one side of the wall, and they followed me to stand a little further from where I sat but directly opposite me.

They seamed uncomfortable, uneasy, and edgy as if they didn't know how to say whatever they had to tell me.

"Spit it out." Though my voice was steady, my heart was thumping so loud I could hear it as I waited for the bad news. But I told myself as long as she wasn't dying, I could pretty handle anything else without falling apart.

The doctor who was speaking to me handed me what looked like a scan of some sort. As soon as he placed it on my hand, like a reflex, I lifted it, squinting my eyes without knowing what I was supposed to be seeing.

"We did a couple of tests on her, and everything is fine except this!"

"What am I looking at?" the doctor's eyes focused on mine, this time, he didn't look uncomfortable or uneasy; he was confident even though I could glimpse worry in his eyes.

"Is he still pregnant?"

the doctor shook his head and then said," no."

"Was it a miscarriage?"

"No," it was a whisper, but I heard it.

"It was an abortion."

None of us spoke for a while; the three of us just stayed in that stillness; it was as if time had stopped, except I could hear my thoughts, feel the anger and resentment rising up inside of me.

"That is why she won't wake up," I whispered, clearing my throat to hide my grief that I was sure could have been heard in my voice.

Silvio must have forced that abortion on her.

"You didn't know about it?"

I shook my head," and neither did she," I mumbled, moving my eyes to rest on Mia's face.

I could see he didn't believe Mia might not have known about the pregnancy, but I didn't feel the need to convince him; I didn't give a fuck about his opinion.

"The problem is the scan shows the doctor who did it left some tissue in the womb."

"What does that mean?"

"We need to remove them surgically." I nodded, keeping my eyes fixed on his face as if I was looking for something specific.

Oh, Bella Mia, I can only imagine the pain you must have gone through.

Rage became my constant companion. I wished I had killed Stefano; he didn't deserve to see another day.

They wheeled Mia to the theater a few minutes later, just as Bruno was coming in.

"Where are they taking her?"

"Would you happen to know where Stefano is?" I asked instead of answering his question.

"Why?"

"Because I should have killed him the last two times I had the chance," I said in bitterness, scrawling at Bruno as if he was to blame.

"I thought you didn't want to kill her father when he was dying."

"That was before I found out they forced her to have an abortion."

Bruno didn't say anything; there was nothing to say to that. No words could be sufficient in such a situation.

"A life for a life." I murmured to myself, moving to close the door of the room.

God! I needed a drink; I wanted to get wasted.

"There is no need; he died yesterday in his sleep."

I laughed out loud in frustration, " he died in his sleep, how nice." I said sarcastically. " That motherfucker did not deserve to die in his sleep," I added in a low tone hitting the window with my fist in frustration.

"They left tissues in her womb, B;" it felt almost like I was about to unload my shit on Bruno, "they probably let her feel the pain to punish her."

I couldn't imagine her pain; I didn't want to, but it seemed selfish not to be considering that baby was mine; I put it in her.

If only she hadn't been pregnant, none of these would have happened.

I stared at the broken window, my image looking disfigured, and I couldn't help but think it represented how Mia and I felt, but mostly how she felt, traumatized.

This was exactly what I was afraid of when Manuel suggested I let them kidnap her; I knew I wouldn't be prepared for her trauma; I was right. I wasn't.

"What about Silvio, any word?"

"No. He's gone into hidden. That son of a bitch is a scaredy-cat when it comes to a confrontation he knows he would lose.

"Do you think it's punishment?"

"What is?"

"Losing our firstborns, do you think it's a punishment?" I repeated, this time looking into his confused face, a clear indication he didn't know what I was talking about."

"Soph miscarried Raph's firstborn too."

"Punishment from whom?"

I shrugged "the gods." he chuckled, his eyes sparkling merriment as if he found the idea of it funny.

He shook his head." No, it's not!" he said in such a conviction that I believed him.

"Is it bad luck then?."

"For Sophie, yes, but For Bella, we have to place the blame where it belongs, right on Silvio's front door."

I nodded in agreement. Part of it was because by blaming Silvio, I didn't have to feel guilty for making Mia pregnant even though it wasn't my intention.

"Can you bring me whiskey the next time you stop by?"

I wanted a drink; hell, I wanted a full goddamn bottle. I felt as if the only way to deal with what was happening was by being inebriated. I guess I couldn't blame Mia for choosing unconsciousness over pain.

Bruno stayed with me for a couple of minutes, leaving slightly before Mia was wheeled back into the room.

The doctors confirmed her physical health was okay. I didn't know how much I needed that reassurance until it was verbalized.

A few minutes later, it was Mia and me again in the room; I noticed they had changed her gown to a black one that appeared bigger than her because the right shoulder was visible.

Her white nail polish had started to chip off, her lips dry with a few cracks. When I looked at her, I felt a series of emotions; least of all was regret that I couldn't have protected her better.

It occurred to me while I was mulling over the events that unfolded prior to her kidnapping that Chad might have lured Mia into that meeting. Stefano or likely Paulie must have approached promising him remuneration if they succeeded. Knowing what I knew about Chad, not to mention Bruno humiliating him, he must have thought Mia deserved it.

For the first time since Mia was admitted, I left her, but I did call Matteo to watch over her for a few hours.

Chad was a pompous ass, a man sold into appearances. Mia said he was a renowned photographer, the fact that he was sought after must have added to his vanity because his office was unnecessarily big, bigger than ours, and we all shared it. His secretary, a young woman of around twenty with long black hair and nails the size of a pinky, stood up when I entered, her smile fake, but then it turned flirtatious when she looked into my face. It was like magic, from a well-practiced smile to a flirty one that should have belonged into a strip club instead of an office.

She came round to stand in front of me, her eyes giving me a come-on and suggestively touching my arm as she directed me to Chad's office.

I said nothing, I considered her too young, yet I had wanted Mia when she was the same age, my hypocrisy didn't get past me.

Closing the door behind me, I leaned on it, facing the man who'd tricked Mia into getting kidnapped.

"I see you know who I am," I said as I recognized the fear in his eyes. I could see his hand fumbling in his pocket, probably searching for his phone. Chad was a coward and a bully.

"Don"t bother"

I stood there looking at him, judging him and finding him guilty.

"You lured Mia into a trap. You knew what would happen to her when you made that phone call." he did not say anything; he just stared at me with pleading eyes. Every human being had a sixth sense if they were attentive enough, and Chad recognized his life might never be the same again.

"How much did you get?"

He started to shake his head, but then I raised my hand to stop him.

"Im tired, " I said. " I haven't eaten well, or slept enough to be nearly reasonable right now, do not lie to me."

He opened his mouth to talk and then closed it again. I lifted my brows, urging him to open his fucking mouth and speak.

"Do you want me to repeat the question?"

"Fifty thousand dollars, "

I laughed without humour, giving him a hard stare until he averted his eyes.

"Not bad, not bad for a man who doesn't pay taxes."

He seemed surprised.

"I know everything about you, Chad. Even that little secret you and your three friends vowed to keep a secret until your dying day when you were sixteen."

The room suddenly felt chilly; his eyes no longer held surprise but shame.

"You've built such a nest for yourself. I bet you must have forgotten all about it."

I could see fear and helplessness, gripping him tightly, and it gave me satisfaction knowing I was not the only one fighting the same. Misery really loved company.

"I won't kill you, not because I'm afraid, but because Mia, even though she hates your guts, might never forgive me. But I can, and I will destroy you."

Suddenly, I felt beaten. As if I was the one in his mercy. It wasn't a win, but it felt good nonetheless.

"It will be your word against mine; you're nothing but a thug." He was a man without hope. He knew he was drowning.

"I may be a thug, but believe me when I say I'm more than nothin."

We stared at each other, my look hard and uncompromising while his was scared and powerless.

"The devil always came back to collect his due." I mocked as I walked to the door.

"I guess I can live with the satisfaction of knowing the devil will come knocking on your door someday." though he said it in bravado, I sensed trepidation.

" I am the devil," I snickered, turning to face him one more time before leaving.

I wasn't happy. I felt like a lioness whose hunting teeth had been pulled out. I would have felt better if I had killed that son of a bitch, but I guess loving a woman meant sometimes, I had to compromise.

I bought a bottle of whiskey on my way to the hospital; I figured if I drank half of it or all of it, I might fall asleep.

I needed to sleep, and the only way to do it was getting drunk; otherwise, I might spend the night the same as I have been doing, overthinking and planning murders as if the devil had pitched camp in my mind.

I drunk half the bottle and then laid beside Mia instead of my bed.

"Is it okay if I sleep with you even though I'm drunk? I swear I don't stink," I said, turning to face her, my eyes drooping.

"Do you hate me, Bella Mia?" I murmured, my voice slurring, palming one side of her face.

"When you wake up, please tell me you could never hate me."

And then I heard something, a whisper against my cheek, and my heart must have stopped. I pulled up my head to stare at her, "Did you say something, baby? Please tell me I did not imagine that, please." I begged, placing my ear near her mouth, " if you can't speak, touch or blow at my ear, just let me know you can hear me."

I stayed like that for so long I started thinking maybe in my drunken stupor I must have imagined that whisper, but before I could move, I felt it again.

"I could never hate you."