I was afraid fear might control me if I let it in, but instead, it gave me the strength I needed to face my demons who hid in the dark.

                           ~WritingRo~

    
                                Romano

Sitting for almost five hours in a small enclosed space in anxiety was less than ideal. I kept thinking about Mia and what she must have been feeling, worried that I might not get to her in time, which was also my fear.

Bruno sat on the opposite aisle with his eyes closed. I wasn't sure whether he was asleep or just closing his eyes.

I shifted my eyes to stare outside the window, looking at my reflection, the wrinkles on my forehead protruding like I was in pain, my face looked gloomy, which was fitting because I felt as if my heart was about to jump out my chest with the way it kept thumping in fear.

Be strong for me, Bella mia, I kept saying.
Don't let any of those motherfuckers break you. This, I said like a mantra.

I was afraid. The fear of God had finally hit me like a hurricane. I felt so weak, and the only thing that kept me from crumbling was because she needed me.

We finally landed in Mexico; I knew Matteo and Devonni were still in transit. But, I was eager to hear what father José knew about the kidnapping or Stefano or Silvio's plan. I knew he might not know everything or much, but even the least could be helpful. I felt like I was waiting for crumbs, but I didn't care; any information regarding any players involved, whether indirectly or directly, however small, could come in handy.

I saw Manuel immediately upon stepping off the jet. He stood sandwiched between two guys of the same height, his hands in his pockets, his expression hidden behind dark glasses. This was one of the few times I hadn't seen a careless grin across his lips.

He took one step towards me when I stopped in front of him, dragging me into an awkward embrace that involved a gentle tap on the back before he released me. It was a surprise me because Manuel did not look like the gentle type; neither was I, and the gesture in its way told me that we had crossed a particular line from allies to some sort of friends.

"Welcome, mi amigo," he said, removing his glasses and then moving his eyes to Bruno. "We always meet in a crisis." Bruno nodded, taking the hand he offered

" I hear you like the Improv; let me know the next time you're there. I'll buy you a drink."

"I'll hold you to that."

"what have you heard?" I asked, cutting off the niceties while my eyes bore into Manuel, hoping that he'd at least heard of something.

Manuel looked at me, then without saying a word, motioned at the two guys who'd stood with him. "This is Luis and Juan, " he stated. I had no interest in knowing their names, but it would be rude not to acknowledge people who were there to help me, so I respectively shook their hand, mouthing the required societal words of acknowledgment.

"Your girl is not here yet, but rumor has it the man living on el heje Island is waiting for a cargo. I'm guessing the cargo is your girl."

"Who is the man?" I knew who it was, god help me because I knew who it was. I just wanted Manuel to confirm.

"Silvio!"

"That son of a bitch! How the hell am I going to get her from such a guarded Island?" it was a rhetorical question, I wasn't exactly expecting an answer, but Luis, one of Manuel's guys, answered. He had removed his coat, tendrils of hair had escaped his ponytail, and he looked like Jesus or what the world vision of Christ was.

"We get her before she gets to the island."

That sounded better, easier at least in theory, but I knew Silvio must have requested for el heje's protection.

"How many helipads does he have?...never mind, it doesn't matter, he can land it anywhere.

"Yes, but a jet has to land somewhere."

"So we are looking at airports and private airstrips, " Bruno said, going through his pockets impatiently as if he was looking for something, most likely a cigarette.

"We need to move before we start causing a stir." I agreed, walking beside Manuel, with Bruno on my right. The last thing I needed was Silvio knowing I was in the country hours before Mia and Stefani landed while they thought I had been fooled into thinking they were taking her to Italy.

By now, they had already confirmed our jet was en route to Italy.

We drove off to Manuel's hideout. A house big enough to host more than a hundred people, secure enough to see danger coming before it appeared on the door.

While we were all seated, a big woman with a headwrap appeared with our drinks. She smiled at Manuel, an indulgent smile, one that couldn't be on a lover's lips. I didn't know what their relationship was, didn't care either, as long as she could be trusted, which I hope she would.

Bruno had finally found a cigarette. He sat near the window, his right leg across his left knee, eyes on his phone.

"Rom, " he called," You need to hear this" it was father Josè's voice talking with Devonni and Matteo; I couldn't believe Mia had been missing for almost ten hours.

Every hour she remained missing was another hour the devil kept me company. My demons constantly reminding me of how helpless I was.

As I listened to father Josè, his calm voice gave me hope that I would get to my girl soon, that I will be able to save her from Silvio's evil and depraved crutches.

"What the fuck did he say?" I roared, standing up, starting to pace around the room while the others looked at me as if I was mad or possessed. Bruno did not have a clue either, so we listen to him again and again until his voice started to irritate me.

Father Josè was telling a story of the king who wanted to kill Jesus when he was born. I had heard this story so many times in my teens; I could retell it in my sleep. But the way father Josè was telling it this time seemed different, the same information, but I couldn't help but noticed he was passing over a message, and for the life of me, I could identify it.

"What the hell are you two listening to?" Manuel asked, looking in our direction, his face wearing a puzzled look.

"A priest sending us a message in Scripture," Bruno said sarcastically, taking a long puff of his cigarette while his eyes remained on Manuel's face.

" I thought you said you grew up in church, " he asked, looking over at us in a superior stare. We nodded in unison, combing my fingers through my hair in frustration.

"I think I know what he's trying to say." Juan jumped in, standing up in front of us as if he was a teacher or some shit like that.

"The King, in this scenario, is el jefe." I began to shake my head, not the way I remember the story. "no, listen to him. I'm guessing this will be an evil representation of that story." Bruno said in a low tone, swinging his eyes from me to Juan's, motioning him to continue.

"The three wise men are the three of you, including Raphael." I nodded, intensely listening as if whatever he was about to say was as essential as me breathing.

"Jesus is Mia?" I asked in confusion. That can't be, I thought.

"The part that is confusing is that the king wants to kill Jesus," Juan, in frustration, breathed out loudly.

"I don't think that is the message the priest is sending," Manuel intervened, still casually seated with a bottle of beer in his hand.

"Then what the hell is his message?"

"One, is that Jesus is in danger; the other is that the king wants to kill anyone who wants to dethrone him. Which brings me to a significant revelation, Silvio is not under el jefe's protection. Your girl cannot be king, so she's safe from the king; however, I heard Silvio wanted the southern distributors, the same one el heje has wanted since I could remember.

Drugs that is what distributors meant. "So el jefe is pretending to protect Silvio, but it's a facade?"

Manuel nodded. " That is why your priest says, "Two people who want to be king cannot break bread."

All of us looked at him. He laughed, taking a sip of his beer, his good eye held a playful look. "Now, I got your attention. The good father is saying Silvio is easily accessible. El heje might have provided protection, but he is hoping his rival is quietly eliminated without him having to raise a finger.

"That doesn't mean we can burst in through the front door, el jefe will want it on record to show he tried protecting Silvio, which means one of us might be killed," I said.

Looking at my watch, like I've been doing since she was kidnapped, I noticed it was now ten hours and counting since she disappeared.

Manuel walked to his fax machine, picking up a paper before handing it over to me. My Spanish wasn't so good, but I was able to read some words.

Four private jets were expected to land in the country in a few hours, but none was to land in an airstrip.

"At least two are landing in the same airport." I said, handing the same paper to Bruno."

" I don't think we will be able to save her from an airport," I whispered, covering my face with both my hands. She would meet Silvio before I got to her. I knew that to be as accurate as much as I knew I would get her or die trying.

Son of a bitch will finally get what he has wanted for the last three years. I thought, anger emanating from me like it had stood outside the door waiting for an invitation.

I swore that I would kill him if he raped her, it wouldn't change anything, but I would get the satisfaction of killing that son of a bitch.

I felt as if the earth was spinning; my brain felt as if it was about to explode.

Slowly walking to the window, I watched the clouds moving, resembling smoke; I watched as they started to disappear to usher in the dark.

It will be the first day Mia would sleep away from my bed since she moved in with me.

The curtains ruffled, swirling around, touching parts of my body as the wind whipped them about, tousling my hair. I remembered how Mia loved to run her fingers through it.

"Are these curls real, or do you get them from a salon?" she often asked her tongue on her cheek, her eyes smiling at me. I saw Mia's love for me every time she played with me, those times she jumped on my back when I walked in front of her, or when she leaned on my shoulder whether we were alone or at the dinner table in front of everyone. The way she palmed my face between her hands, intensely looking into my face, and then kissing my forehead.

She reduced me to a needy man every time she did that. I felt wanted, needed, and cherished, something I hadn't felt in a long time.

When I made love to her, it was as if I was discovering a treasure. Her body felt as if it was made for me and the beauty of it was she never used it against me. Whether she was mad at me or not, she made love with me the same as always, with passion, with an intensity that cannot be described.

She was mine. I would allow no one to take her from me.

"I have decided to love you." she once told me. I knew she loved; she'd said it to me that often. But this was different; she said she wasn't sure if it was possible to love anyone else as much as she loved me and whether I love her back or not didn't matter because she couldn't stop how she felt even if she wanted to.

"would you stop loving me if you could?" I had asked, and she had looked at me for so long I thought she wouldn't answer, but then in a said voice she said: "no, but I wouldn't love you as much as I do, I would make sure I loved you just a little bit."