IT'S JUST another normal meeting with the team. Colleen, Clint, Steve, and Natasha are collaborating together to locate more Hydra bases to invade.

So far they've managed to intercept a message, but it is proving hard to decode. There seems to be no pattern to the mixture of random letters, dashes, icons, and numbers; it's just a bunch of nonsense.

Since they're making no progress with the coded message, they spilt the team off into two different tasks: Colleen and Clint continue trying to crack the code while Steve and Natasha try to hack into some Hydra databases and documents retrieved from the last mission.

Everything's normal until Natasha and Steve seem to freeze as their eyes rapidly scan the laptop screen in front of them.

Colleen notices their sudden change in demeanor and glances over at the pair with a furrowed brow. "What's wrong?"

At her worry, Clint looks up from his task and casts Steve and Natasha a glance.

Steve tears his eyes from the screen. "We found something."

Excitement shoots through Colleen. "More coordinates?"

"No," Natasha refutes, causing Colleen's excitement to falter. "It's not locations, it's just a long list of information."

She doesn't elaborate. Clint, just as curious and perplexed as Colleen sitting beside him, asks, "Information about what?"

Natasha's eyes fleetingly meet Colleen's. "The child experiments."

Just like that, Colleen is out of her chair and standing behind Natasha and Steve to look at what they've found. "Really? What does it say?"

She rests her hand against the top of Natasha's chair as she leans in to better see the screen. Instead of having to squint her eyes to read the small text, Natasha presses something that emits the screen into an enlarged hologram that hovers above the table.

Clint rubs his chin as he tries to understand what exactly they're looking at. It's a long chart of names with other personal information listed in categories beside them. Almost half of them are highlighted in red, the rest in green.

The breath in Colleen's throat hitches. Red must mean dead, right? She didn't realize how many children had failed Hydra's experiments. She didn't realize how many children they had.

A thought strikes Colleen. "Do you think I'm somewhere in the chart? And the other kids, too?"

"Let's see." Natasha scrolls through the list and stops when her mouse hovers over the word 'telekinesis' in the power category. It's highlighted in red. Then, she drags her mouse to the left where the corresponding name is listed.

Jordyn Pruitt

That can't be me, Colleen thinks, but then she sees the other details in the chart beside the name and she realizes there are too many coincidences for the name not to belong to her.

Ability: Telekinesis
Date of Birth: May 23, 2000
Place of Birth: Pennsylvania, United States
Parents: Chris and Erin Pruitt
Blood Type: A Positive

Colleen hides her hands behind her to conceal how badly they're shaking. "How do we know if this is actually me? What if they gave someone else telekinesis, too? And doesn't red mean, like, dead or something?"

Part of her prays that this person—Jordyn Pruitt—isn't actually her since she already has a whole identity outside of whoever Jordyn was. However, another part of Colleen holds onto the hope that it is her. She never knew her real name, where she was born, or who her parents were.

"Red could just mean failed or no longer in their custody," Steve pitches in.

Clint tilts his head, still processing all of this. He glances between Colleen and the hologram. "Is the blood type right?"

"Yeah."

"Then I think it's fair to say that's you, Colleen," Clint replies. "Or, should I say, Jordyn."

"My name's still Colleen." She gnaws on her bottom lip in thought before turning to Natasha. "What about the others? Can we find them, too?"

So far, each name listed has a unique power that isn't repeated in the chart. Natasha scrolls through and stops each time she spots one of the kids' powers.

First is Ben.

Name: Gabriel Boucher
Ability: Electrokinesis
Date of Birth: January 3, 2008
Place of Birth: Montpellier, France
Parents: Adam and Anastasie Boucher
Blood Type: AB Positive

Then, they find Anna Beth's.

Name: Grace O'Sullivan
Ability: Telepathy
Date of Birth: March 15, 2010
Place of Birth: Mullingar, Ireland
Parents: Conor and Alana O'Sullivan
Blood Type: A Positive

Sloan's is next.

Name: Amelia Carter
Ability: Pyrokinesis
Date of Birth: June 1, 2016
Place of Birth: Alabama, United States
Parents: Dominic and Janice Carter
Blood Type: O Negative

The last, who is at the very bottom of the list, is Emmett.

Name: William Suzuki
Ability: Intangibility
Date of Birth: December 12, 2019
Place of Birth: California, United States
Parents: Akihiro and Gina Suzuki
Blood Type: B Negative

All of them are marked red. Could red mean that the others who aren't with Colleen have also escaped? Or are they dead?

And another thing: they know the parents of each of the kids, Colleen included. The kids are minors, which raises the question of whether they'd be sent to live with their parents. Just the thought sends a shock of panic through Colleen and she feels her stomach drop.

Days ago, Anna Beth was worried that Colleen would never find happiness or love as long as she and the other three were around. The truth is that she doesn't think she could live without them.

Mind spinning, Colleen chokes out, "Does this change anything?"

"For now? No," Natasha says. She must sense where Colleen's thoughts are because she sends her what she intends to be a reassuring smile but comes as a grimace. "You know what, we don't we call it a day? I think we've made enough progress."

Nobody argues. At least, Colleen doesn't think anyone argues. She's too stuck in her terrifying thoughts to hear anything else as she packs up and exits the room.

•••

Colleen's mind replays one thought like a broken record:

They're going to take the kids.

No, the kids aren't technically hers and their parents and family deserve to see their missing children, but they aren't really their family, are they? Colleen considers the five of them—Ben, Anna Beth, Sloan, Emmett, and herself—as their own little unconventional family. Colleen is practically raising all of them. She taught them life skills, academic skills, and self-defense skills. She has been showing them what it feels like to be loved.

The fact that they could possibly be torn apart terrifies Colleen. Her whole livelihood outside of Hydra has been taking care of these kids. Surely everything will work out and they'll be able to stay together, right?

Colleen doesn't tell the kids about the new information. She isn't sure if she's being selfish by keeping them in the dark, but she just doesn't know how they would react. Would they demand to go live with their biological parents as soon as possible? Would they change their names to their legal names? Would they hate Colleen? Would they just not care?

The next few days are a blur. Colleen mindlessly goes through the motions while trying to remain looking pulled-together for the kids. With Anna Beth, however, it is a struggle. Colleen tries extra hard to think of anything else while she's around to avoid the redhead from listening to her thoughts about their newly discovered identities.

Natasha, along with Steve and Clint, understand that Colleen has a lot on her mind and wants to spend extra time with the kids just in case they have to be taken away, so they allow her to skip their meetings that week. While Colleen would usually insist to continue working, especially since it's for a good cause, she can't bring herself to.

Ben and Anna Beth have started to notice Colleen's solemn clinginess. The pair exchange a look when they're all snuggled together on the couch with a movie playing, Colleen's eyes on the kids more than they're watching the TV.

If Sloan notices the shift in Colleen's mood, she doesn't mention or question it. She's just happy to have more Colleen time, especially since she's recently been so busy with Emmett.

After their movie, Colleen makes sure to give all the kids hugs and kisses goodnight. Ben gives Colleen an odd look when she gives him an extra hug and he makes a mental note to ask Anna Beth if she knows why Colleen's being so clingy lately. Once they're all in bed—Anna Beth and Ben in their own beds, Sloan in Colleen's, and Emmett in his crib—Colleen takes a shower.

She doesn't even get to putting conditioner in her hair before she hears Emmett start to cry. She decides to just skip it and steps out of the shower in her towel before dressing in her pajama shorts and tee shirt.

By the time Colleen enters her room to tend to Emmett, Sloan has already woken up. She's standing on the tips of her toes, her hands holding herself steady as she peers into Emmett's crib.

"It's okay, Emmett. Don't cry," Sloan whispers.

Colleen rests a hand against Sloan's back. "Hey, Slo. Go back to bed, okay? Emmett probably just needs his diaper changed."

Sloan's nose scrunches up and she lowers herself from the tops of her toes so she is flat on her feet. "Eww."

"I know," Colleen agrees, patting Sloan's head before nudging her towards the bed.

The little girl yawns and climbs back on the mattress, burrowing herself in the sheets.

Colleen lifts Emmett out of his crib and holds him up to smell. As soon as she gets a whiff of his diaper, it is confirmed that he needs his diaper changed.

Once Emmett's wearing a fresh diaper, Sloan's already fast asleep. Colleen lies Emmett down as he yawns and rubs at his eyes with his little fists.

Everyone's asleep except Colleen. The thing is, she doesn't think she can sleep with all that's on her mind.  Her body longs to rest and her eyelids droop with a familiar heaviness, but as soon as she closes her eyes, they snap right back open. She can't shut off her mind. In the silent darkness, her thoughts are loud and unavoidable. She hopes across the hall Anna Beth isn't awoken by her loud thinking.

Just to make sure she doesn't interfere with Anna Beth's sleep, Colleen tip-toes out of her bedroom and pads down the hall to the kitchen area. She isn't hungry or thirsty, so she walks right through. She doesn't realize where her feet are taking her until she's standing in another hallway staring at Peter's closed door.

Before she can lift her hand and rasp her knuckles against the door, what Anna Beth told her about what May thinks of her pops into her mind. May is right; Peter is incredibly busy and overworked. He's probably out patrolling as Spider-Man. And if he's not, then he's probably catching up on some much needed sleep. Between juggling life as a college student and being Spider-Man, he doesn't have time to deal with Colleen's problems. He shouldn't have to.

It's not a big deal, anyway; she just can't sleep. Why did she come running to Peter instead of dealing with it herself? She should just go back to the living room and sit down for a while. Maybe an interesting documentary is on TV.

Just as Colleen's turning to walk back to the living room, the door opens, Peter's head sticking out with his hair a mess and his eyes droopy like he just woke up.

Colleen feels like a deer caught in headlights.

"I thought I heard you," Peter says, his voice deep and raspy. He opens the door more and leans his arm against the doorframe.

Guilt wracks through her chest for disturbing his sleep. "Sorry, I just—I couldn't sleep, and I wasn't thinking. You can go back to sleep, I'm sorry for waking you up."

She starts to turn again, but Peter's voice keeps her from going too far.

"It's fine," Peter assures as he rubs the sleep from his eyes. With his eyes more alert and awake, he notices how conflicted she seems. Her bottom lip is pulled between her teeth, her eyes are distracted, and her hands wring together. Brow knitting, he asks, "What's going on?"

Two voices in Colleen's mind battle against each other. One reminds her how much stress Peter's under and how she doesn't need to burden him with her problems, but the other voice begs her to trust him. He trusts her enough to share about his past—how he got his powers and thought he was dying, how a villain had tried to drown him and dropped a building on him when he was fifteen, how he almost died in space during the Battle of Titan. He has been vulnerable with Colleen about his deceased parents and Uncle Ben. He trusts her, and although she also trusts him, she doesn't show it often.

"I've just got a lot on my mind," Colleen admits, slowly opening up.

Peter leans away from the doorframe and opens the door the rest of the way, wordlessly welcoming her in. Colleen gives him a small smile of appreciation as she walks in.

They sit on Peter's bed after he turns on the light. It's their default position now—their backs against the wall with Peter's legs extended in front of him and Colleen's knees tucked to her chest, their shoulders just barely touching.

Colleen leans her head back against the wall and stares up at the ceiling. She has been sitting silently for a few moments, probably almost a full minute, but Peter doesn't push her. He's so patient and understanding that it makes it easier to be vulnerable with him.

"We found something a few days ago," Colleen eventually says, bringing Peter to look at her. "Natasha and Steve managed to open some files Steve took from our last mission. It was a long list of names with birthdates, blood types, parents, birthplaces, powers . . . It's a bunch of information about the child experiments."

Peter's eyes search Colleen's. After a few beats, he asks, "Was your name on it?"

Colleen turns her head and looks at Peter, mildly surprised. She never told him that she was one of the experiments, though she guesses she didn't need to since it's kind of obvious given the fact that she has telekinesis and is passionate about taking down Hydra. Plus, Peter's insanely smart, and it doesn't take a genius to connect the dots. Why had she danced around exposing her past when it isn't even that much of a secret? Whatever the reason, she's glad she doesn't have to explain it to Peter.

Colleen presses her lips in a straight line and nods. "And the kids' names. Well, our real names."

"Your real names?" Peter asks, puzzled. "You mean your name isn't actually Colleen?"

Colleen offers a shrug. "Yeah . . . I named myself, and each of the kids. We weren't given names at Hydra but, apparently, our birth names were still on file."

Peter nods as he takes this in. "So what's your birth name?"

"Jordyn Pruitt," Colleen replies, voice a mixture of bitterness and another emotion Peter can't decipher. She picks at under her nails. "But that's not . . . I'm not Jordyn, you know? Maybe I was for a little while, but as soon as Hydra took me, I wasn't Jordyn anymore."

"You were Colleen," Peter finishes, trying to keep up with her thoughts.

Colleen shakes her head. "I wasn't Colleen until after I escaped, I think. In Hydra, I don't really think I had an identity; I barely thought for myself and I just did whatever they ordered me to do. I didn't think there was a world outside of those stone walls." She feels Peter's gaze on her as she stares at her hands. "I don't think I was anybody until I got out and saw that there was a world outside of the routine I followed in Hydra. And I found a purpose, which was saving other kids like me." Colleen's face falls. "And now I think they're going to be taken away from me."

Peter frowns. "What do you mean?"

"We know who the kids' real parents are now," Colleen explains around the lump that rises in her throat. "I'm pretty sure it's going to be a legal matter on who gets to take care of the kids."

"They can't just take that away from you," Peter interjects. "That's just—that's not right."

"Their parents lost their children when Hydra stole them as infants," Colleen argues, though she isn't sure what side she is on. "Surely they'd want their kids back, and I'm not even legally their guardian, so it shouldn't take much to take them from me."

Peter looks absolutely torn. He looks away, processing everything Colleen just told him, and runs a hand through his wild hair. "What about you?"

Colleen looks up from her hands. "What about me?"

"Will you have to see your family?" Peter clarifies. "I mean, I know that you're an adult, but don't you want to meet your family?"

Colleen sighs. She hadn't even thought about her own family. "It's been twenty years, they've probably moved on."

"But do you want to meet them?"

She pauses. Does she? They are her biological family, sure, but she has an entire life without them and they probably have an entire life without her. They're strangers.

Maybe if she was younger, like Ben's age, she would want to meet them. It'd be different if she was a kid, not twenty years old. She used to dream about her family back when she first escaped, but that dream was quickly forgotten when she built her own family with Ben, Anna Beth, Sloan, and now Emmett.

But now she could have a chance to meet them, to fulfill that momentary dream.

"I don't know," Colleen eventually confesses, brow pulled forward. "I don't feel like I need to meet them, I mean, I have my own life without them and they have their own life without me. It's different for the kids, though. They haven't been separated from them as long, their parents probably want them back."

"Do they want to be with their parents?" Peter asks.

Colleen sighs. "I don't know, I haven't told them. I don't know how they'd react, if they'd want to leave or if they'd want nothing to do with their real parents. I don't know which one is worse."

The lump in her throat resurfaces.

She can't lose them.

"I know it's probably not up to me," Colleen murmurs, her voice low to hide how it shakes, "but I can't lose any of them, not even Emmett. They're my family."

Her attempts to hide her emotions are futile. Peter watches her with sympathetic eyes and internally struggles with how to help. He's the type of person who likes to fix things, but they both know that he can't do anything to fix this.

So, he instead of attempting to fix it, he wraps his arms around her. She melts in his embrace and rests her forehead against his shoulder. It makes her walls fall and the dam in her eyes spill over with silent tears.

"I can't lose them," Colleen whispers into his shoulder, too scared of losing her family to be embarrassed about the crack in her voice.

Peter rests his cheek against the top of her head and holds her closer. "I know."

She knows it isn't certain that she'll lose the kids, but even the smallest possibility is enough to petrify her. Luckily, she isn't alone. She has Peter to hold her together.