Author: Arwen Gray

Reviewer: SheWritesWonderss

Cover: I like the simplicity of your cover. Simple covers can really stand out. When I first saw your book your cover left an impression, and I could easily associate your cover with your story because of the mark it keft in my brain! I would suggest you make your subtitle a little larger/easier to read since I can't easily read it. Little tip on subtitles would be to choose something that is 3-6 words since it is more likely to keep a short subtitle in a reader's head rather than a large one.

Description: DAMN. That's the perfect word to describe your description. It makes you want to go on this journey and read every word of your story. It's short. It's intriging. It's dramatic. It's breathtaking. You did a wonderful job. Case closed.

To Improve: Instead of telling the readers that our character is constantly abandoned and an outcast in society you could have flash backs incorpriorated into your stories where you show us that he is an outcast, or show people that disregard your character.. It makes for a better read to learn things about your character by using indirect characterization rather than direct because it's more entertaining.

This next tip is more of a formatting thing. In your first chapters, you seperate certain sentences from a paragraph to give it a dramtic effect/get the point across. That is a wonderful tool to use, but if you do that with every couple of sentences it loses it's effect. It also makes your writing seem not as good as it is. By combiing some of these sentences and choosing your favorite ones to leave out, you could elevate your writing to a whole new level and leave a lasting impact on your reader. Please note that some chapters did not have an excessive amount of spacing in it.

I would also suggest having the character's name that you are writing in as the first word in the chapter. You do it on most of the chapters, but there is a couple where you did not have it. Reason why I would get the person's name on the chapter is because it got confusing to figure out which POV you were telling the story in and figuring it out got me really side tracked.

Grammar/Spelling/Sentence Construction: Grammar was great. Good job knowing the rules for dialouge since most writers tend to forget how to punctuate dialogue. Though there is a part in chaoter 10 when you put a space in between the who says what part and the actual dialouge. You spelt everything right, and you sentence construction was 100%.

Diction: Your word choice never bored me! I like adapting the type of word choice I am using to the audience I am aiming at and what type of a speaker my character is, so your word choice showed me you put thought into how your character talks AND what age group you were writing for.

Plot: You plot was extremely creative! I liked the concept and it kept me interested. I would add a couple more subplots to keep the reader that more hooked. That way it guves your readers even more question to ponder over.

Compliments:The quotes you used in your chapter headers were chilling and amazing!

Imagery was great in your story! You helped the reader visualize and hear the sounds you were portraying to us and it was a wonderful journey.

Overview: To anyone looking for a twisty tale that will give your chills go check out Fallen Skies! It is a fanfiction, but can easily be read without prior knowledge to the BTS fandom. I don't follow BTS and still understood the story perfectly!

Thanks for being so patient for your review! You were a great person to work with and I hope we continue supporting eachother's works!