I don't know how long it's been but I've felt so alone for a long time... I just want to socialize but it feels like no one wants to talk to me or get annoyed at me... is it just my brain? I don't know... I wish I did... it's all so confusing and I hate it... I wish I knew what was what... I wish I could just be around anyone other than family... I wanna talk an listen and play around... but everyone's kinda just... left me... I don't blame em, they all have outlets and actual lives out there... I wish I did... I wish I wasn't a clingy piece of shit, I must be so crazy to people for needing so much reassurance and taking very tiny detail as some sort of problem or hint to something... I don't wanna be bad... I just wanna have a good time and I'm scared of ruining everything and causing problems... cause I feel like that's all I ever do... cause I'm not good enough no matter how much I try...
I really wanna hug someone right now... I wanna do nothing but hold onto someone, I don't wanna explain how I'm feeling I just wanna let it all out. Maybe have them tell me that its ok or that it's all in my head... I feel like everyone has someone to do that to but I feel so closed off from the world...