Genre: Teen Fiction

Summary: Summers vacations have always been monotonous. Same old television at home, same old enlarged calorie intake just because the stomach gets bored too.

Dhwani, was normal too. Normal grades, normal friends, normal life. This year, summer is nothing short of extraordinary.

This year, it goes rogue.

+ Cover

Cute but dull. It wouldn't really bring in the readers if that is what you are aiming for.

Rating: 7/10

+ Title

Since I didn't read the whole story I don't know what connection does the title have with the story. Not a bad title by itself but I do wonder if there will be any connection.

Rating: 7/10

+ Summary

At first I thought it was a sci-fi fic. The way you described it and your cover all pointed that way to be honest.

It was a bit misleading for me.

Rating: 7/10

+ Plot

Up until now it sounds like a cliché teen fiction story. Of course, it may take a turn for the better later.

Rating: 6/10

+ Characters

Dhwani: Sweet name. She seems to be the usual teenage girls who hates going to her grandparents house.

Kush: Typical bad boy.

I am not all that impressed with your characters. There is nothing wrong with them being normal but they should also be interesting that we feel like knowing more about them.

Rating: 6/10

+ Chapters

Length: Not bad.

Grammar, etc: It does need to be edited. The grammar is fine but the sentence placement leaves a bit to be desired.

General:

You mentioned that there isn't much of an age difference between her and her uncle. But then you never did mention her age and that kept on bugging me.

In the next chapter, how did she know he was hot if he didn't even remove the helmet? And according to my Indian friend (who pushes me to read the stories and finish the reviews), that girl must be pretty lucky to find a handsome guy of her age so easily in a place like India. (Of course that's her opinion since I don't know anything about India personally but I can attest that all the girls in the stories are lucky since we don't seem to have any cute lads around here)

But I do envy her that she can go on late night walks and her grandmother doesn't even question her about it. I guess they are used to her going to watch the sunset.

But I have to admit that her grandmother is cool. She doesn't even sound like a grandmother to be honest. I would recommend that you put in a little dialouges so that we feel like she is old. The way she talks made me imagine a young lady in her 30s at most. There is nothing wrong with teasing the grandchildren or acting childish but it should be done within limits so as to not seem over the top.

Other than that, this story seems that it would suit a whole lot better in the western part of the world rather than in India.

I am not saying that modern things don't suit in India but it seems unlikely (modern grandmothers, short dresses when guests come, and leaving a girl alone in the house with a boy; though to be honest, the last part doesn't fit in any story)

That being said, it will be interesting to see the dynamics between them.

I do have a soft spot for bad boy stories even though this needs a bit of editing and tweaking to make me squeal at their interactions.

+ Conclusion

A typical teen fiction set in the Northern Part of India. Bad-boy-with-a-bike lovers can check it out.

+ Overall Rating

6/10