Title: A Thunderstorm Pact

Author: dxzzlingsoul

Genre: Humour

Summary:

It was more of a rude awakening rather than a happy one when Ashley River discovered that Autumn was in full-swing in her pleasantly normal city of Menlyn Heights.

For you see, autumn in Menlyn Heights in a Leap Year nonetheless was home to freak thunderstorms - a mere coincidence seeing as Ash had a rare case of astraphobia.

So what's a girl to do when an old pact is resurrected by her best friend turned sworn enemy, Wyatt Brooks, who is dead set on helping her through the chilly season?

Reviewer: angelyntjf

Review:

Prologue:

I absolutely love this. I found it really engaging, that it tells the readers enough to leave us on the edge of our seats yet not enough that we are desperate to find out what happens and why.

I found it very intense. Perhaps it's because of your use of words (especially the "fate being that" part) and I really want to know why and what exactly is the thunderstorm pact haha. I'm not going to lie though. It kind of feels like a superhero/vigilante kind of story.

Keep up the great work!

Chapter One:

I really love how you write this. I love your writing style and how well everything flows. It really fits the kind of feel you were going for.

I did however noticed some errors in your word usage. For example, somewhere in the beginning of the story, you wrote "shade some light". It should be "shed some light". It's no worries though. A proofread will be able to fix that. Just pointing it out for you.

I really love your character development. I love how you introduced Wyatt and Ash and Nora. I love how you weaved bits and pieces about them into your words so kudos to you on that.

I did however find that this chapter pales in comparison with your first. It's probably because it's literally just a normal day at school. Nothing wrong with it though. Just thought I'd point that out.

Overall, I really did enjoy reading this. Keep up the good work!

Chapter Two:

I honestly find Wyatt and Ash's relationship absolutely hilarious haha. I really enjoyed reading their rivalry and hostility towards each other. I'm really curious to see what happened to make them hate each other so much.

Once again, I found this chapter rather dull. While I absolutely adored your description, I found that the pace of this chapter is rather slow and it got a bit draggy at some point. It's mostly due to the lack of happenings in this chapter. I know chapters like these are necessary in every book but just keep in mind that the first few chapters of every book are very important to capture the attention of your readers.

Your characters really have a lot of depth in them and they seem like an actual person. This is excellent in your part so kudos to you on that!

Nonetheless, this is a very nice chapter and I did really enjoy it.

Overall:

Your prologue was really really strong and engaging but I felt it kind of dropped from there. Nonetheless, I love seeing your characters interact and get to know them as well. It'd be great if you hinted or added some foreshadowing (if it hadn't happened yet) about the thunderstorm pact in your chapters. I wonder how they relate. I do really enjoy reading it though.

Rating: 7/10

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