//

3 months Later

Mia and Arvin never discussed the kiss they almost shared. Both silently thought it would be best to not talk about it. Lenora was the first to know from Mia who lightly scolded her friend that she should've done so because Arvin told him all the regret of not kissing Mia later that night as well.

Right now, Mia rubbed Lenora's back, also holding her hair as she threw up in the pot Emma left for her.

Lenora has stopped asking Arvin and Mia to join her at Helen's grave. She didn't mind much. She got more focused on a small waitressing job she got at a local diner. She was scrounging for some extra cash especially since Constance yelled at her the other day for just touching Thomas's safe.

"Maybe I should stay with you," Mia told Lenora. "I can bail on church to look after you."

"No, you need to go. I'm already missin' a day of church as it is, you shouldn't," Lenora told her once she was done. "And I have Uncle Earskell here to look after me."

"Still," Mia stated, as she crawled over in Lenora's bed, laying beside her to which Lenora rested her head on Mia's chest like a child. Mia stroked her hair as she spoke, "I don't like leavin' you sick by yourself."

"I'll be okay, I promise," Lenora replied, listening to the soothing sound of Mia's heart.

"You want me to bring you some soup from the diner?" Mia questioned. "I can make a quick stop after church."

Lenora shook her head. "No, thank you. But..." Her eyes lifted to meet Mia's. "You need to tell him how you feel."

Mia sighed, knowing where this was going. "Lenora, I-"

"He likes you. I know he does. And I know you both regret not kissin' each other that one say," Lenora told her.

"You think, you don't know," Mia stated.

"I know that you have feelin's for him that go past friendship," Lenora replied.

"I told you I do but..." Mia trailed off. "I don't wanna ruin somethin' great that we built for years because we're young and stupid with feelin's."

"I don't think you and Arvin will ruin anythin'," Lenora said. "I think you'll get married, have some beautiful babies..." Her voice fell silent at the word but Mia didn't pay much attention as she spoke clearly again. "And grow old together."

"Not every couple gets a happy endin'," Mia replied. "And who says I needed to have any children when I got you?" Lenora looked at her in confusion. "I did raise you halfway with grandma, didn't I?"

Both girls chuckled as Arvin turned the corner entering the room. "Mia, we leavin' right now," he stated.

"Okay," Mia said before she kissed Lenora's forehead, sliding off the bed and making sure she was comfortable. "I'll see you later."

Lenora didn't reply with an 'okay' like she usually did but told her, "I love you, Mia."

"Love you, Lenora," Mia replied with a smile. "We'll go see your mama's grave when you get better. And with that, Mia left with Arvin and Emma. 

If Mia had known what Lenora was planning, she would've never left in the first place.

***

Mia sat in between Emma and Arvin as she stared up at Preston Teagardin preaching.

"The good book...is filled with good men and women sufferin' delusions," Preston spoke. "Eve in the garden. Noah...naked, drunk. Bringin' shame upon his family. The idol the Jews bowed before in the desert. And even the Lord Jesus himself was presented with delusions in the desert that only through his faith and his strength overcame..."

Mia actually paid attention to his words this time. She would rarely listen to any preacher when she was at her Sunday services but something, like a voice in the back of her head, told her to focus on every single word.

"...The Lord's delusion in the desert was a game of the so-called 'Devil'," Teagardin continued. "And what the Lord experienced was a delusion that would've kept him from savin' us! But he did not fall for it! It is our delusions that lead us to sin. Strikin' a mother or a wife for somethin' that you thought they said. Neglectin' work or Sunday service, for that matter. Some girl...gets a feelin' for a fella and lets him have her holy gift. Delusions!" Mia flinched at his yelling as everyone around her mumbled in agreement. "Blasphemin' the Lord in your mind and in your heart for some wrong done to you by another person."

For a mere moment, Teagardin's eyes met her gaze to which Mia looked down at her shoes. He smirked briefly. He finally got her attention.

 ***

As Mia looks back at this event, she wishes she never went to church that day even if Lenora would be mad at her for it.

Arvin brought everyone back home to the Russell home to which Mia as she was cleaning up Lenora's area. She saw that the girl was out of bed but just assumed she went to the bathroom. But as she walked to the kitchen with the pot filled with vomit, she noticed the bathroom door was wide open and Lenora was still not seen in the house or any other rooms. 

It was then when she heard the distressed yells of Arvin, she placed the pot down and ran outside of the house. She followed Arvin's voice to the shed and right outside, her mouth fell open to which she covered her mouth with her hands and tears immediately stung her eyes.

Arvin was holding the limp body of Lenora who was hanging in the shed with a rope tied around her neck.

Arvin saw Mia and yelled, screamed for to help but the girl didn't move. Looking at the pale color of Lenora's skin, it was evident she had been hanging there for a while and was already long gone.

Mia hunched over, leaning on her knees as her breathing got heavy as if her lungs were going to collapse.

Emma suddenly came out of the house, running past Mia.

And that's when Mia let out the most heartbreaking sobs that made her body tremble, tear after tear pooled down her cheeks. Her legs wobbled and gave in to which she fell to the floor, pulling her knees up to her chest so she could wrap her arms around her legs as if to hold herself together from falling apart.

It was the same thing she did when it sunk in that Thomas passed. Mia's heart was broken, shattered to pieces with grief and pain. Now with her another person she loved gone, Mia's faith in anything good died. Not just her faith in God but her faith in all of humanity.

***

This was a very short chapter but I'm technically grounded rn and sneaking Wattpad on the computer...you guys are welcome btw.