Chapter 38.
Assalamualaykum.
"What is the best in worst situations of us? The hope in ALLAH mercy." -MyQuote.
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Noor's POV:
The night was dark, and my mind was silent. It was eerily silent in the car as well. I was on my side, resting my knees on the seat and I lay by my side, Ammar has bent back the seat for me to get some sleep. His coat was wrapped around my shoulders and the warmth of it was comforting. More likely his scent was all around me.
My eyes were on him, the night was extra cold tonight and it was like a mumbling as rain drops fell on the car closed windows, adding to the coldness.
"You okay, babe?" My eyes blinked as Ammar spoke up for the first time since we have gotten in the car. I smiled and nodded slowly.
His eyes flickered to me and he smiled lightly at me. I blinked and stayed unmoved. Why does it feel like something is not right..? My inner voice whispered as I noticed that his smile didn't reached his eyes.
His eyes. Gates of love wrapped in mystery, one look and you are frozen on the spot. Everytime I look in his eyes I feel myself loosing into the depths of the grey sea. He blinked and so did I, coming out of my thoughts.
"You look tensed.." I whispered, letting my thoughts have a voice and he looked ahead of us. I frowned slightly when he let a soft sigh, leaning back on his car seat. His one hand on the steering wheel while the other resting quietly on the gear. I waited silently, wishing for him to open up to me.
"You can share your worries with me.." my voice was low and I didn't realize when my hand rested over the back of his which was between us on the gear. My breath hitched slightly as his hand shivered under my light touch. His eyes moving quickly in the direction and the raising up to meet mine. I gulped, he looked slightly shocked. I smiled lightly. He deserve to be shocked, it's the first time I have approached him..
"I.. uh.." he fought with the words on his lips and looked ahead again. I kept patience and stayed silent, letting him have his time so he can say what is bothering him lately. I can tell there was something but He seemed liked in an invisible fight as to he should tell me or not.
Help him decide.. my eyes lowered to my hand and I traced it to the palm of his hand and held his hand in a manner of understanding. He looked on the hands and I gulped when he speed up the lazy drive. My hand tightening around his.
"I won't judge.." I assured. Of course he was worried that I will judge him. We didn't had a good start since forever. But as we are now husband and wife I think we at least should try to be understandable to each other. I was taking first step. Maybe our relationship will grow with time.. the hope made me look at him and saw him looking back at me.
I could see the glint in his eyes. He wanted to say something, yet he forced to choose otherwise.
"No, There is nothing." He said after several minutes of silence and I nodded slowly. Maybe he just need a little time before he can actually speak up to you about his worries.. I thought to myself and let the subject drop. And with that silence was again in the atmosphere.
Soon enough my eyes felt heavy and I let myself give in to the sleep. Before I did so, I saw him. He, my husband. Driving silently and somewhere in my heart I felt secured because I was with him.
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Ammar's POV:
Loosely wrapped fragile fingers of my wife were still in my hand, she was asleep as I parked outside on the far parking of the basement.
I didn't wanted to ever bring Noor anywhere near here but this was important. I turned to her side and rest her hand on her lap. She was so innocent and beautiful. I felt a smile tugging on my lips as I traced my finger along her cheek, feeling the guilt building up in me, my smile fell.
She had tried to know about my worry. It made me happy to a huge level but unfortunately I couldn't let her know that I have been involved in such an illegal act. When I have done this, I couldn't care less if anyone find out.
But now I fear.
I fear when she will find out,she will think wrong of me. Yes, I was wrong but I don't want to be. Somewhere in me I want to be right. For her.
"I am sorry, baby." I whispered to her sleeping beautiful figure. I was sorry that she had tried to take a step towards me and I had let her down by keeping an secret. Mobile vibration make me look away and I lean back to my seat. I looked at Noor one last time before I opened the door and stepped out, making sure to make no noise.
Walking towards the basement, I messaged Saif that I am coming. I was near the turn which will lead me to my torture house but before that I felt my steps halted as my heart tugged in my ribcage. I blinked and looked back at my car.
Noor peaceful face was in my eyes and I gulped. Just this one last time and then I will not engage in such acts again. I want her to be peaceful just like she is in this very moment.
"Sir, this way." My eyes snapped ahead of me and found Saif stood by the end of the front porch stairs. I hide my emotions behind my hard expressions. As I walked ahead I was determined to finish this matter for once and for all.
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Klaus's POV:
I stepped in the house as I found the door was unlocked. I figured out Rukaiya is already here.
I was still processing as to why possibly she have texted me saying she will be at my place. Earlier in the wedding she had made it clear she has nothing to do with me.
Walking in I shrugged off my coat and closed the door from inside. My eyes roaming around as I search for the girl for whom I have starting to care. I was about to walk in the kitchen when..
"Hey." The soft medolic voice called out and I stopped walking. Turning around, I found her sitting on the couch.
I gulped.
Soft curly long hair falling down on shoulders and back, she was sitting there on my couch. Her face free from any make up at all. Her lower part covered with a blanket while her upper body was clad in my shirt and not in her dress anymore.
She was wearing my shirt, not her dress. I gulped.
"Hi." I replied as I walked towards her. She smiled at me as I stood by her side now.
"Hi." Her voice was having a hint of shakiness as She gulped, I could see her collar bones as she has left the upper two buttons of my oversized shirt open. I sat and she scooted away in a flinch making me to stop from leaning in at all.
"Are you okay?" I asked and she lowered her eyes.
"Yeah." She nodded, her hair falling on side of her face. I felt my heart beat a little faster as she looked away, her breathing ragged. I blinked a few time before my I raised my hand and pushed the strands back gently. She closed her eyes. My hand went down her hair rested on her upper back. I could hear her heart beats fastening.
Feeling maybe she wants me I leaned closer and kissed her cheek, I could hear the sharp intake of breath. I pulled back and looked at her.
"Ruks.." my voice was deep and my want was clear in it, I didn't had to hide it. I like her and she is here, whatever she has done so far is forgiven because she is here with me. Maybe she likes me back. I gulped and held myself back, she needs to tell me she if she wants me to continue.
I remember her saying again and again that what happened between us was a terrible mistake and she would never repeat it. I was still shocked as to why she is here in such a vulnerable state. Behind the beauty of this beautiful girl I can see the fear of something in her as well. Her hands fisted, holding the sheet so hard in her hands as if her life depend on it.
When I stayed unmoved her eyes opened and she looked at me. I gave her a small smile and she blinked.
"What happened..?" She asked, a frown settling on her forehead. Her eyes looking around to see if something was wrong and I shook my head.
"Nothing, babe." I assured her and her eyes returned to mine. I nodded and she gulped again. Her eyes lowered and she looked up at me again. I kept staring at her.
Who will ever say she is Rukaiya. The girl who is cold hearted according to everyone. Who can say she is this innocent girl. She shivered when my hand went a little lower on her back. She looked at me and I frowned slightly.
"Ruks, you look scar-" I started to comfort her but she cut me off by suddenly leaning forward and kissing me. I stopped in the moment and kissed her back with passion. Leaning forward as she bent back, my arms wrapped around her waist. I kissed her deeply just how I feel for her. Raising my one hand I rested it on her cheek. Feeling some warm liquid on her cheek I stopped.
I pulled back from the kiss and she gasped lightly, I was out of breath as well. I frowned when I saw the tears in her beautiful eyes which has streamed down her cheeks. I felt like someone has stabbed on my heart as I saw the sadness in her eyes along with tears.
"Ruks-" I said and she shook her head.
"D-Don't stop." She said and held my face in her hands as she leaned in to kiss me again. No matter how hard it was but I looked away. I stood up and she looked at me with surprise.
"What are you doing?" I asked her and she gulped. I took a step back and she looked down.
"What do you mean? Don't you want this?" She asked, looking up at me. I frowned.
"What?" I was actually more confused now. She bit her lower lip and stood up. The blanket slipping down her gorgeous legs and I looked away.
"Look at me, don't you want me?" She asked as she now stood infront of me. I refused to look at her. I was not understanding what she actually wants from me. More importantly,
"Do you want it?" I asked as I looked back at her and she gulped, wiping away her tears. She nodded. But it looked like she wasn't. I stayed unmoved and she moved closer, I suck in a deep breath.
"Kiss me, Klaus..." she whispered softly and I felt my eyes resting on soft full pink lips. I gulped and looked up in her eyes and every thought of kissing her flew away when I found myself lost in her pain. She was hiding all her pain in those beautiful eyes. I shook my head and she frowned.
"You don't want this, babe." I said softly and she glared me. Anger taking over her delicate features. Her hands fisted my collar.
"I do!" She said, more likely wanting to convince herself than me.
"You don't." I argued and she pushed me, I didn't moved away instead I held her waist and pulled her closer. She held her breath as I stopped only few inches away from her lips.
"You sure?" I challenged and she nodded, her breath was still hitched. I could feel her body shivering near mine.
"Fine." I said and scooped her in my arms causing her gasp as she wrapped her arms around my neck. I started walking to my bedroom and she looked ahead of us and then back at me. I can see the fear, the real Rukaiya but she hide herself behind the facade. As I walked in I kicked the door close and felt her shiver as I lowered her on the bed. She was breathing heavily now.
If I didn't cared for her I would have said to myself she was just turned on but I knew she was scared and I here wanted to comfort her and when she laid down I hovered on her. Her hands raised in instant to shield herself but she lowered them again, fighting her invisible battle. I smiled and kissed her forehead and she couldn't help but flinch.
"I want your-" I whispered as I leaned near her ear. She held her breath as my lips traced near her ear.
"I want your heart, Rukaiya.. not your body." I said what I had in my heart and pulled back to look down at her. She opened her eyes and fresh tears welled up in her eyes yet she stayed silent.
Her lips stayed quiet but her eyes spoke way louder. I just needed the way in her world so I could know the pain and snatch it away. I gulped when a soft tear rolled down her eye.
"I don't have a heart.." she whispered, her voice weak. I smiled and wiped her tear away with my thumb.
"You do." I said and she frowned at me.
"You have my heart." I whispered and she closed her eyes.
I stayed silent and then slowly moved back but she held my wrist. I stopped and looked down at her.
"Stay." She spoke lowly and turned to the other side, pulling me on the bed in process. As I laid down she kept my hand on her belly. I smiled and wrapped my arm around her waist and felt her sobbing lowly..
"It's okay, Love. I got you.. sshh.." I whispered softly and kissed her by the side of head. Her sobs were low and silent and I kept holding her closer, trying to let her know that,
I am with her.
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Assalamualaykum..
How are you..?
It's been long since we met.. I am sorry for the sudden distance.. I had many up and downs and they are still there. But, Alhamdulillah..
I appreciate you all for waiting for me.. Jezakh ALLAH khair for understanding..
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