"The chains are broken, but are you truly free?"

****************

Lilly's POV

"It's true that I don't know you," I mumbled softly, my eyes fixed on her name etched in stone, "But somehow, I feel like I do."

Retracting my hand, I tucked it into my coat pocket, seeking refuge from the chilly air, "I just can't shake off what Dad called me the other day," I whispered, my gaze drifting to the damp green grass below, "How I seemed to live up to my name," I added, feeling the sharp pang of pain in my heart, almost like it was never going to dispitate.

She had the same name as yours;

She was so selfish, so are you.

And I thought no one could cause more harm than she already did,

but here you are, living up to your real name;

Leya.

His words had left an indelible mark in my memories, embedded deep within my consciousness. Lifting my gaze once more, my eyes continued to trace over the name on the headstone, my thoughts consumed by a sense of melancholy I am newly learning to deal with.

"I wish you were alive," I said, my eyebrow raised slightly and my lips twitched, "I feel like we'd have so much to talk about."

My thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the sound of light footsteps drawing near, accompanied by a subtle shadow falling over me. Lifting my head, I saw Emma approaching, her hands nestled in the pockets of her leather jacket, her gaze initially fixed on the headstone before shifting to meet mine. Silently, she lowered herself to the ground beside me, her eyes remaining focused ahead as she spoke.

"Figured I'd find you here," she said softly.

The lump in my throat swelled, and I attempted to swallow it down, the tension thick in the air and inside me. My gaze flitted across Emma's face, uncertainty weighing heavily on my mind and heart. I gazed at her for a moment too long, taking into her features more closely this time; Her hair fell down in small waves around her shoulders. Though I couldn't pinpoint her exact age, I knew she was a couple of years younger than my mother.

Yet, there was something so different about her, almost like none of the passing years got etched into her delicate yet sharp features.

Her eyes held a mesmerizing depth, a unique shade of green that seemed to hold a world of untold stories within them. Despite the undeniable weight of sorrow and fatigue, she exuded a quiet strength, a resilience that spoke volumes about her character.

It was no surprise she was a leader. I've never met anyone more deserving of the title.

She shifted her gaze from the headstone and turned to me. Sensing the weight of the moment, I attempted to steer the conversation away from the subject of Noah for now.

"Did you know her?" I asked.

She nodded her head, "We've met, a couple of times," She answered, "But I didn't know her that well," She added, "I guess Nikolas is the only one who actually knew her, better than anyone."

I nodded, understanding that he was the closest to her based on everything I am aware of now.

"Do you think she was bad?" I asked.

Furrowing her eyebrows in contemplation, she appeared puzzled by my question. Her eyes drifted ahead as she considered her response, "I don't think she was a bad person," she replied thoughtfully, "She was just someone who happened to make many bad decisions."

Then, she shrugged, "To be honest, we all make such bad decisions in our lives, don't we," She added.

"It's just, that her decisions, affected those around her more," Emma said, "So it's common for people to assume that she was the bad guy," She explained it further, her point of view similar to mine, "I know that in a way, she had hurt both Nik and Alex," She shook her head, "But I don't think she ever meant to. I still believe that she loved them both in her own way."

"She and I have more in common than I originally thought," I spoke my thoughts out loud, my lips twitching into a somber smile.

Emma removed her hand from her pocket before she brought her arm around my shoulder, pulling me to her and I fell into her embrace. She rested her cheek against my head and I pressed my eyes shut, trying to keep the melancholy tucked away but I failed, all those emotions fell through my closed eyes, "I miss him so much already," I whispered.

She tightened her arm around me, "I know," She whispered, the emotions fighting within her felt too heavy, too much to bear but she was able to control them somehow.

I edged back, bringing my hand to my face and wiping off the never-ending tears, "Come with me," Emma said, getting up to her feet and extending her hand, "I want to show you something."

Without hesitation, I placed my hand in hers as she helped me up to my feet. We made our way out of the cemetery and soon found ourselves in her car. The engine roared to life as she drove us back to the mansion.

Ascending the stairs, Emma led me in a direction I hadn't previously explored. She opened one of the doors, and I stepped inside, my curious gaze taking into my surroundings, immediately struck by the massive space ahead of me. It resembled an office, albeit a remarkably huge one.

What truly caught my eye were the ceiling-length bookshelves that adorned the walls. Each shelf was lined with rows upon rows of antique volumes, their leather-bound covers excusing an air of sophistication and speaking a tale of generations old.

The room was bathed in warm hues of brown, from the rich mahogany of the furniture to the deep tones of the wooden floorboards.

In the center of the room stood an imposing desk, its surface adorned with neatly arranged papers and antique ornaments. A plush leather armchair sat behind it, while smaller seating areas dotted the interior of the room and I could only wonder who originally designed this place with this antique touch.

Emma left my side and headed for one of the closet cabinets. She opened it and pulled out something before gesturing for me to join her on the brown leather couch situated on the other side of the room. Taking a seat, I watched as she settled beside me, a small smile gracing her lips as she caressed the leather exterior of what appeared to be a photo album.

"I didn't have any pictures growing up," she began, and I listened intently as she spoke, "That's why I've always placed great importance on this," she continued, "I made sure to store every moment of Wyatt and Noah as they grew up," she explained, opening the album.

As she flipped through the pages, I found myself drawn in, leaning closer to get a glimpse into their past, the one hidden away from us. I felt the air get stuck in my throat, each photograph preserved precious memories that were now frozen in time.

My heart stuttered as she paused, her finger caressing one picture in exact, it was a much younger Noah, I was sure it was him, cradling baby Wyatt in his arms and I felt my inside falling apart again, unable to comprehend the cruelty that took him away from us.

Emma's fingers traced every corner of the picture, his little face and body. She turned the page, revealing another snapshot of them gathered around a Christmas tree, and my vision blurred with all these emotions. It felt like I'd never overcome this, like I'd never stop blaming myself, that he died, and I lived. That wasn't right. It wasn't fair.

As much as glimpsing into the past affected me, it must've broken Emma tenfold. Unable to keep herself intact, I saw the tear that escaped her eye, traveled down her cheek before it fell into the album, holding in its molecules a very loud cry of pain and despair.

She lifted her hands up and wiped at her cheek, the back of her head pressed into the couch and she mumbled, ever so weakly, "Do you think he forgave me?"

I edged closer to her, wishing to comfort her in any way I could, "When we were hiding, he was telling me how he is so scared of you not forgiving him," She looked at me, the tears filling her eyes and she shook her head, ever so helplessly, "Oh god, it's never gonna stop, is it," She said, her hand pressing over her chest, addressing the heartwrenching pain surging through every nerve of her body.

"I am so sorry," I mumbled ever so brokenly. "This...all of this, it's my fault," I added, shaking my head at the fucked up situation I can't seem to get myself out of.

Emma wiped at her face and shook her head, her hand reaching for mine, "No, it's not your fault, Lilly," She said, so sure, not for once blaming me, even though he died for...me.

"God, I never wanted him to get into this," She said, her eyes looking ahead as she sucked into a stuttering breath, "But he always wanted to fight, he always wanted to be a part of this, and I couldn't stop him, neither could Roman," She shook her head, "And when Alex said that he needed someone to look after you, someone that we could trust, I knew it was only him, he was the one we trusted the most."

I nodded my head, "Even when Nathan threatened him, he...he always found ways to keep me safe," I mumbled.

She nodded her head, her heartbroken gaze flickering back to the pictures, trying to find some peace in these old happy memories.

"Did I ever meet him when I was young?" I asked, just wanting to know more, to know anything about him.

Emma nodded her head, "Yeah, a couple of times actually," She said, sniffling as she tried to gather herself back, "But you were so little, you wouldn't remember."

God, it's still so hard to believe that we all grew up far away from this truth about our family.

"When Isaac died, when I took over," Emma started, probably sensing the questions I couldn't ask out loud, "We knew that we had to keep our distance, despite everything, our life was still dangerous and we needed to be careful, for you, for Max, for Nik's family, for everyone's sake, we had to take some hard secure measures," She explained their reasons, "We hid the truth for a reason, Lilly."

"We had been through so much by that stage, we needed to at least make sure that our kids didn't end up with the same fate," She added, "Your parents gave you and Max a normal life, one you would've never had if Roman and I were close or a big part of it."

"And Nikolas?" I asked.

She nodded, "The same goes for him," She said, "He was the one to decide to move away, to erase himself from your lives, or else it would've gotten so complicated, for you and for Max, and even for him own family," She explained, her words showing that no matter how hard they tried, they couldn't keep us shielded for all of our lives.

"We did everything for you guys, we did everything but we still failed," She said, her jaw tightening at the mere thought of it, "One kid only, one fucking kid ruined all of our plans," She added, referring to Nathan only.

"So, I am starting to believe that all of this, that this...tragedy, it runs in our blood."

My eyebrows pulled closer, "That's what Nathan said."

Emma's eyes met mine, "What?"

"Nathan, he said those same words," I clarified, my jaw tightening as I informed her, "He was at the funeral."

Emma straightened her body, the muscles of her jaw working at the new information and I added, "He said that he cared about Noah in a way."

Emma scoffed and I nodded, "Yeah, I didn't believe him either, so I stabbed him."

Emma's eyes grew wider, "You did what?"

"He didn't die, I mean I just stabbed him in the stomach and Nikolas helped him afterward," I added with a frustrated sigh, my eyebrows pulling closer when I realized my rookie mistake, "I should've stabbed him in the chest, right?"

Emma's eyebrow raised, "I am still on the fact that you actually...stabbed him."

I nodded, "I want him dead," I spoke honestly. I still want him dead, I think I won't be okay till he breaths his last. He started everything and it should all end with him.

"I want him dead, too," Emma said.

I nodded, "So, will you help me?" I requested, "Or at least, let me help you?"

Emma's gaze flickered all over my face, as if trying to comprehend something, "You want Alex to kill us both, don't you," She said in mockery.

I smiled somberly, "I love my dad so much and I know that he loves me more than anything," I mumbled, shaking my head as I added, "But he will never see me as anything but a little girl who is incapable of making one decision on her own, he always expects me to trip and fall," I shrugged, "And maybe he is right, maybe I am like that but, but I really need to do this," I shook my head, "And he doesn't need to know about it."

Emma's gaze was still trying to discern me, understand me better, "So, this is why you stayed?"

"What was I supposed to do?" I mumbled, "Go back and resume my life like nothing happened?" I shook my head, "Noah is dead. Nathan is alive. Something is not right. Something needs to be done about this or I won't be able to move on."

She nodded, agreeing with me to some level.

I even purposely pushed Chase away, because he wouldn't let me do this on my own either. He would get hurt in the process, and I was not going to let that happen. He is much better far away from me for now.

"So, will you help me?"

She stared at me for a long second before she nodded her head, "On one condition," She said, "You tell me everything and you never do anything without consulting with me first."

A wash of relief washed over me because I had her on my side. I nodded my head, "I will, I promise," I said.

She nodded in satisfaction before she asked, "So, what's on your mind?"

I shifted in my seat, getting more serious as I spoke, "I have a plan."

******************

Nikolas's POV

My gaze flickered from Nathan's unconscious form to Ronald across the room. He was hunched over, his feet occasionally tapping the ground. His eyes would dart between Nathan and the floor, a wave of anxiety palpable in his demeanor.

He had been silent all throughout the day. We took Nathan to the hospital yesterday and had the doctor stitch up his wound before he made the necessary tests to check up on the progress of his condition. After that, we brought him to Ronald's house to rest, to keep him here, as there seemed to be nowhere else suitable to take him to at that moment.

"We should've looked for him," Ronald's voice broke through my thoughts and I turned back to him, confused as I asked, "What?"

"He made it out, he and Christian, they got out of the fire that day, we should've looked for them," Ronald said, his voice hardening at the possible what-ifs, "If we just did, none of this would've happened."

"How were we supposed to know," I said, "The fire ate the place up, and the whole fucking building collapsed on itself-"

"I know, I know, I was there," Ronald grumbled, recalling back bitter memories, "Still, we should've known, it's not like this isn't common in our lives, they made it out, we should've known, or at least suspected it, we should've done something!"

I let out a low sigh, rubbing a hand over my face, "It doesn't change a thing, Ronlad," All the wishes and what-ifs; there is no taking back everything that happened. We all learned that the hard way.

"I know, I am just-" Frustration seeped into his voice before he shot up to his feet, the weight so heavy that he started to pace around. He paused only to look at me, "Do you have any idea what we're supposed to do now?"

I shook my head, just as lost because all of this was beyond fucked up, "I have no idea."

Should I save him, or just let him die? Should I protect him or just let Emma and Alex end him like they wish to? Should I cling to the little kid he was or focus on the one who hurt my own kid? I had no fucking clue.

Lilly's words from last night had messed up with my head, hitting me in all the wrong places. She was right in a way, but...

There were a hundred different but.

"What does Nate think about all of this?" He asked.

"What do you think," I mumbled, "He is still her brother, she'd rather him alive than dead."

"Then, why isn't she here?"

I shook my head, "Because she still can't get over the fact that he hurt Nathan," Rightfully so.

A low sigh pushed off my lungs and I leaned forward in my seat, "This is all getting too much, so I sent her back home with the kids," I added, shaking my head, "But I can't leave just yet."

"There is Emma, Lilly is here, and-" My gaze went back to Nathan, "And because of this."

Ronald nodded in understatement before he resumed pacing around, still trying to figure this out.

"What did the misses say about this," I asked, referring to the fact that we're keeping Nathan at their place.

Ronald shook his head, "She is okay with it," He said, "She even thinks we should give him a chance," He added, his gaze flickering over Nathan, "I told her to stay at her father's place for now, because the problem is, I want to help him but I can't even trust him." Like me, he is aware that Nathan could still pull something, part of why I'd rather have Natalie and the kids continents away, and he'd rather have his wife away too.

A low cough interrupted our conversation, drawing both of our attention to Nathan as he stirred in his sleep. Another cough racked his body, strained and harsh, scratching at his insides, and jolting him awake. He attempted to pull himself up, but the coughing fit seemed almost uncontrollable. I moved closer to his side, and he brought his hand to his mouth, covering his mouth as he coughed once more.

My eyes caught the drops of blood that fell into his hand, staining his lower lip as he coughed them out. His disoriented gaze fell to his hand, his other one tightening over the blanket at the mere sight of blood.

I grabbed a napkin from the counter and approached him, reaching for his hand, and taking it into my own as I wiped the blood away. My touch seemed to snap him back to reality, and his gaze shot to mine, his shocked eyes locking onto mine. Silently, he just looked at me. I stayed silent too as I let go of his hand and wiped the blood off his mouth, a fucking war raging in my head.

I discarded the napkin into the bin and Nathan finally looked away from me, his gaze drifting around the room, taking notice of his surroundings. His throat bobbed as he swallowed hard, his eyes going to Ronald and then again back to me, "Where am I?"

"His house," I answered, nodding at Ronald.

He seemed to slowly regain back his latest memories, recalling what happened last and he looked down at himself. His fingers curled over the hem of his sweatshirt, pulling it up to look at the bandage covering up his stitched-up wound.

A low sigh left him and he let go of his sweatshirt, still looking down at his lap, "So, what happens now?" He asked, his tone blank, "You kill me? You lock me up again? or you let me go?"

I shook my head, "None of the above."

He lifted his head up and looked at me, lines etching between his eyebrows, "But I want to go," He said, ever so casually making his demand.

I nodded, "Yeah, and I'd really want to be with my family right now but we don't always get what we want in life, do we?"

The muscles of his jaw worked and he leaned back, his back pressing into the headboard. He crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes going to Ronald, "I am hungry," He said.

Ronald rolled his eyes, annoyed, "I will get you something to eat," He grumbled before he exited the room, more than ready to be away and not face all of this.

Nathan's gaze left Ronald's retreating back and ever so discreetly traveled around the room, searching for something and carefully assessing the place. I figured he was looking for anything he could use as a weapon as he seemed to be planning his escape; Either he is too easy to read or his thoughts are just so similar to mine.

At last, his gaze found the bottle of water on the bedside counter, next to it, a glass cup of water stood.

My lips twitched, "Thirsty?" I asked.

He shifted his gaze to me and nodded, ever so innocently, "Yeah."

Giving him a nod, I poured the water into the glass, curious to see what he was going to do. I handed him the glass and he took it with a low mumble that sounded like thank you.

He pressed the glass's tip to his lips and started to slowly sip on it. I stayed standing by the bed's edge, at a close distance as I eyed him. From his peripheral vision, I knew he was watching me and my every move.

He lowered the cup into his lap, his hand wrapped tightly over it. He wanted to break it, I knew that, but I think he is unaware of his weakened state yet. I could hear the wheeze in each breath he struggled to take. His face looked so pale, not just because of his blood loss yesterday. It was bigger than that. And I am too sure the results of the tests we had done would reflect just how badly his condition had progressed.

He kept his gaze focused ahead, the cup tight in his grip as he thought of the possible ways to break it. I pretended that I had no clue whatsoever, looking through my phone as I allowed him to have his little moment.

It took him a second or two, then in a swift motion, he moved his arm, slamming the glass into the headboard with every force he could master, causing it to crash, the pieces piercing into his palm, the blood seeping into the white sheets but he couldn't care any less. He clung to the biggest piece as he pushed himself to his feet with utter determination.

I crowded his space, standing in his way, "Just let me go," He grated out, his eyes hard and impenetrable, his self-made weapon pointed at me, "Let me go and I won't hurt you."

I tried not to smile, "Go ahead," I said, challenging him, "Hurt me."

His jaw worked, his grip on the glass tightening, its sharp edges penetrating further into his own flesh, "I won't do anything, I promise, I won't go after anyone, let me go and I will just...you know sit still, look pretty till I die. I promise."

"Okay, go ahead," I said, not once moving from my spot.

"Get out of my way, then," He grated out.

I lifted my shoulders up in simple defiance.

My nonchalant act only triggered him more, "Just let me go, Nikolas," He said once again, unaware of how tightly he was holding onto the glass, it was so deep in his flesh, that he was going to cut out a nerve if he pushed any harder.

"Put the glass down," I said, my hand moving forward to take it away but he moved it out of my reach. As I tried to catch his hand, he used the glass as defense, ready to push it into my flesh but my reflexes were faster than his and my fingers curled over his wrist, holding him back.

"Let me go," He grated out again through clenched teeth.

"You're bleeding, let go of the glass, Nathan-"

"I will, when you let me go," He insisted again, something so off about him this time. I could see his fingers twitching over the glass, his lower lip trembling just slightly before he tightened his jaw, trying to get a grip on himself.

He tried to push himself out of my grip but I didn't allow him, "Put the glass down," I shot out again but he stubbornly held it tighter, "You're hurting yourself," I grated out as I glared at him.

"Let me go," He added and I shook my head, challenging him back, "I won't," I edged my face closer and said, "You're not going anywhere."

Being so close, I could discern almost every little detail on his face, like the sweat that beaded up on his forehead, the way he was failing to take one single normal breath without his lung crashing down, and most importantly, the fear in his eyes, so immense, so overwhelming, so much fear, which is why he wants to go so badly, so I won't see it. So I won't see him like this.

"Let me go," He whispered again.

"No."

His throat bobbed again, and he tried to move away, so I wouldn't be this close but my grip on his arm was so tight, that it kept him in one place, "What are you so scared of?"

"I am not scared," He sounded too convincing but his body language and eyes screamed a different answer.

"You're terrified, Nathan," I pointed out, "So terrified of me seeing you like this," I added, "Weak, vulnerable, sick," I said, every word forcefully hitting him in the face, "And dying."

My words had his eyelids fall down, and his palm finally opened up, letting the piece of glass fall and shatter to the ground. Blood furiously seeped from the inside of his palm, covering my own and the sleeves of his sweatshirt.

My jaw ticked and I pushed him back, "Sit," I said, my tone showing him that there was no place for negotiation here.

He dropped back on the bed's edge and I pulled the handkerchief out of my pants pocket before I sat by his side, my hand curling over his wrist and pulling it closer as I wrapped the cloth over his plam, tightening the knot and I pressed my hand over it, in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

Nathan didn't dare to turn or even look my side, he kept his gaze focused away and I found myself saying, "Let me help you."

My words had him snap his head in my direction, a bit taken aback before he regained composure, "Who told you that I want to be helped."

I sighed, applying more pressure to his wound and he didn't even wince. I ignored his refusal and added, "We'll find a way around everything," I said, apparently making up my mind on where I stood in this, "I will protect you, I will figure out a way to convince Emma and Alex," I added, "As for your health, there is a way, you don't necessarily need to die-"

He shook his head, "Who told you that I didn't want to die," He spoke, his eyebrow raising, "To be honest, I am impatiently waiting for that day to come already," He added, turning his head away as he lowly mumbled, "I will finally see him again."

"Your father?" I asked, trying so badly to keep my calm.

He nodded, "Yeah."

My jaw tightened, "You miss him?"

He looked at me, "Yes," He said, his jaw working, "And I want to punch him so hard in the face."

For some reason, his words suddenly lowered my anger level and I couldn't help the way my lips twitched. The corner of his lips lifted slightly and her averted his gaze away, trying not to look at me as he hid his smile.

"I am serious, Nathan," I said, because I just have to do this, "Let me help you."

He shook his head, "Don't," He mumbled, "Because if you do, I will have to start feeling bad for what I did, and if I feel that, I will just have to feel every other fucked up thing," He shook his head again, "And I don't want to."

"So, let me go, I will not hurt anyone, I will just sit and wait for it to happen," He added, "A couple of months and you'll go back to the life you had before me, isn't that the dream?"

I let out a low sigh and rushed a hand over my face, "Now I get what Alex went through with me," I grumbled out. This shit was not easy at all. I looked back at him, "You are my karma, aren't you."

He shrugged, "Which is why I am giving you a way out of this," He commented.

My eyebrow raised, "By letting you go?"

He nodded, "Yup."

"Not happening," I said and he groaned in annoyance.

After a short moment of silence, he brought his non-injured hand to his chest and rubbed at it, discomfort evident on his features. He winced slightly, his brows furrowing as if trying to push through some type of pain. Another cough raced up his throat, strained and dry, leaving him breathless for a moment.

I watched him closely, concern knitting my brows together as another fit of coughs rushed out of him, followed by blood. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and closed his eyes for a long second in an attempt to find some relief from the pain that plagued him.

I rested my hand on his shoulder, squeezing at it reassuringly. His head hung low and I saw it, the lone weak tear that broke through the threshold and traced a path down his cheek. His eyelids glided open and he turned his head to me, "Please don't do this, don't help me, I don't want to do this," He whispered, "Just let me go."

Was it his tears, or the vulnerability in his voice, or the little Nathan I saw trying to crawl his way to the surface, whatever it was, I acted on instincts. I used my grip on his shoulder to pull him closer to me. His head fell into my chest and I wrapped my arms around him. My chin pressed into the top of his head.

His fingers fisted on the back of my shirt, clinging to me, to anything. I pressed my eyes shut, "I am sorry," I mumbled into his head, cradling it in my palm, "I should've looked for you."

I could feel the wetness of his tears seep into my shirt, "You didn't know," He whispered, just newly coming to terms with that simple fact.

"There was a part of me, as small as it was, it suspected it, it felt that something was not right, but I was just too destroyed at that point to even listen to it," I admitted out loud for once.

I looked up, my eyes meeting Ronlad's at the doorway. His gaze flickered to a broken Nathan in my arms, then back to me and he realized that we had no choice but to do this. He had no one.

Nathan edged back, bringing his hand to his face and wiping at his cheeks. Ronald walked inside with a bag in hand, "I brought food...what the hell happened in here?" He shot out, eyes widening as he took notice of the broken glass, the blood on the sheets, and the ground.

I looked around, "Nothing," I said, "We'll just have to use plastic cups from now on."

Nathan looked at me and his lips pulled up into a faint smile. I smiled back and looked at Ronald, who seemed extra annoyed for some reason.

He sighed, "Okay, I guess I will be the one to say it out loud," He said, "We are on the same team now, aren't we?"

I nodded my head. Nathan looked between the two of us and he hesitantly nodded his head.

"You two are aware that this means there is a much bigger stronger opposing team against us, right?" Ronald added and I shot him a glare at his pessimism.

"Ronald, shut up."

"I am serious," He said, "If Emma kills me because of this," He added, pointing his finger forward at us, "My wife will come after you two."

I rolled my eyes and Nathan's eyebrows pulled closer, "You're married?" He asked, apparently unaware of the fact.

Ronald nodded, then he smiled, ever so giddily, "Oh yeah, did I not tell you that?"

Nathan shook his head, curiously asking again, "Do you have any kids?"

Ronald stared back at him in utter disgust, "God, no," He said before he narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Nathan, "Why are you asking?" He asked, "You missed stabbing kids and taking their kidneys?"

Nathan's eyes widened, "What, no-" He sounded flustered at the direct accusation. His throat bobbed before he turned to me, "I am not gonna live that down anytime soon, am I?"

I shook my head, speaking from experience, "No, you won't."

His lips pressed into a thin line, "Awesome," He mumbled sarcastically.

Ronald kept glaring at Nathan suspiciously. I sighed out loudly and rushed a hand over my face, "I am starting to think this was a bad idea."

*******************

Lilly's POV

I was in bed, lying down, trying to engross myself in a book I had plucked from the shelf in the office Emma had shown me earlier today. I kept skimming through it, hoping its words would coax me into slumber. Yet, despite my efforts, sleep eluded me once again. Frustration mounting, I closed the book with a thud and tossed it onto the bedside countertop.

Pressing the back of my head against the pillow, I shut my eyes tightly, attempting to quiet the messy thoughts swirling through my mind.

A light knock on my door broke through my thoughts and I straightened my upper body, "Come in," I said, expecting it to be either Emma or Uncle Roman.

To my surprise, it was Nikolas.

"I saw your lights were still on," He explained his presence at this late hour, "Can I come in?"

I nodded my head, hoping he'd be a good distraction from my dark thoughts.

He stepped in and closed the door behind him. He paused by my bed, "Can't sleep?"

I shook my head, my lower lip forming a pout, frustrated at this situation.

I tapped my hand over the mattress, on the spot next to me, "You can sit," I said, "Maybe you can be my teddy bear, and I can finally sleep," I said, my tone drowsy with tiredness. His lips twitched and he sat down next to me, he raised his arm up and I scooted closer to him, my cheek rested against his chest and he wrapped his arm around me.

"I thought you were still mad at me," He said, addressing our little discussion from yesterday.

"I am, but I am too tired to think of that now," I mumbled, closing my eyes and hoping his warm embrace would take me to dreamland, "If you make me fall asleep, I will forgive you."

He chuckled lowly, running his hand soothingly through my hair, but nothing was helping. My nerves were wreaking havoc in my stomach, accelerating my heartbeats and thereby keeping me fully awake.

"How did you get me to sleep when I was young?" I mumbled.

"You won't tell anyone?" He checked first, piquing my curiosity and I edged my head back, looking at him, "I am intrigued, tell me."

He smiled, "I'd sing to you."

My eyes widened, "You?" I asked, "Singing?" I added, "To me?"

He nodded his head, rolling his eyes at my dramatic response, "It was just a lullaby."

"Still, you sang to me, wow," I mumbled, shocked before I rested my head in his embrace, "Sing one for me now."

"Not happening," he said sternly and I groaned, whining as I mumbled, "Then, please distract me, just let me think of anything else."

"I didn't see Ashton's son around," I never thought he'd opt for this conversation.

"He has a name," I grumbled.

"Yeah, I don't exactly like him, so I'd rather not address him with his name," He responded.

"I am sure if you got the chance to know him, you'll like him, he is the best," I mumbled, my heart stuttering at the realization we were apart again. I miss him already.

"You know what, you are right," He said, taking me by surprise at first, "I should get to know him up close, probably have him kidnapped again and-"

I pulled my head up and narrowed my eyes at him and his logic, "Stay away from him," I demanded and he rolled his eyes. I was about to fall back into his embrace when I realized something, my eyebrows pulled closer and I asked, "What do you mean by again?"

"Well," He hesitated, unwilling to tell me at first but then he confessed, "I kind of kidnapped him and his mother back in the day-"

My eyes grew wide and I pulled back from his embrace, "What?!"

"Well, it was in the past, like way way in the past, you know, back when I was the bad guy-"

"Wha- How?" I shot out in shock, the news hitting me like a brick, "You kidnapped Auntie Katherine and Chase when he was a kid?" I shot out, in disbelief still.

His throat bobbed, sensing my disappointment and he nodded his head, "But it's all good now. Katherine forgave me, she made me threaten a few people for her and we called it even."

"God, you're unbelievable!" I shot out, thinking how much more of his past doings I was unaware of.

"How could you do that?" I added, "He was a kid-"

"Well, yeah, I didn't do anything to him," He defended himself, "His father got him back in one piece, but-"

"But? There is a but?"

He gulped down, "Well Katherine, she kind of fell and hit her head, not because of me I might add, so she ended up in the hospital, I think she was in a coma or something for a while..."

I pushed myself off the bed, still trying to drink in the feedback of everything he was dropping on me, "You are unbelievable!"

He got up as well, "I'd like to remind you that this way in the past," He added.

My eyes only grew wider, "Still!" I shot out, "I can't believe you kidnapped Chase and got Katherine into a hospital-"

"I'd like to remind you that I didn't exactly get her into the hospital-"

"Oh god, this is not the type of distraction I was looking for!"

He walked closer to me and I glared at him, "I only wonder what more you have done."

He paused and seemed to be thinking of it, his expression twisted and he shook his head, "Well, there is too much," He said, coming to a stop right across from me, "You are gonna need a crash course on old-bad me."

His lips twitched and I glared at him harder, "It's not funny!"

He shrugged, "You can't deny that I distracted you at least."

I only glared harder.

He smiled and I lightly pushed at his arm, "Stop. It's not funny."

"Yeah, it's not...well, it kind of is," He said and I hated how he made my own lips twitch, "Stop," I mumbled, covering my mouth and he chuckled, his arms reaching for me and pulling me back into his embrace.

"I still can't believe you kidnapped Chase," I mumbled, unable to recover from the fact.

"I even let him stay in the same room as you," He said, "Bad old me probably rooted for you two since day one."

I chuckled and lightly slapped his chest, "Stop," I mumbled and he chuckled too before he dropped a soft kiss on the top of my head.

The nerves twisting my stomach had calmed down, this little moment, as shocking as it was, served its purpose and pushed me out of my grief and into something entirely different.

"I can't believe the man who sang a lullaby for me is capable of kidnapping another kid," I mumbled, edging backward and looking at him.

"We all have a weakness, Lilly," He justified and my eyebrows pulled closer, "I was your weakness?"

He nodded his head, bringing his hand and tucking my hair behind my ear, "You always will be."

I stared back at him for a long second before I asked, "What do you think Nathan's weakness is?" The way I diverted the conversation slightly took him by surprise.

He was silent for a long moment before he answered, "Isaac."

"But he is dead," I pointed out.

He nodded, "Yeah, but he will always be Nathan's biggest weakness."

My shoulders slumped down, and a low breath parted past my lips as I dropped to the edge of my bed.

I looked up at Nikolas, "You still think Nathan is worth saving?"

He nodded his head, "Yeah, I do."

I pulled my legs up, got under the comforter, and rested my head on the pillow, feeling utterly drained, "I don't."

Nikolas edged closer and he fixed the comforter over me, tucking it below my neck, "I guess we'll just have to disagree on that."

I nodded, "I guess so," I mumbled, my eyelids so heavy I couldn't keep them open any longer.

Nikolas brushed my hair away and dropped a kiss over my temple, "Good night, Lilly."

Feeling myself slipping into a deep slumber, I mumbled, "Goodnight."

****************

Three weeks Later...

"I can come with you," Uncle Roman said, insisting to join me on my very short trip.

"There is no need, I will just drop by the old campus, and check their programs, you know maybe I would find something interesting, maybe I'd apply for a Master's next semester," I said, trying to weave my excuse.

"Yeah still, I can accompany you-"

"Roman, why won't you let the girl breathe," Emma interjected, sensing my desperation and being my only supporter over here.

He turned to his wife, "I am just suggesting that she doesn't have to go alone, I can drive her to Cambridge."

"I know, but it's okay, I can take the train, Cambridge is only an hour-ish away from here," I added.

"See," Emma pointed out, "She is not a kid, she doesn't need supervision all the time."

Uncle Roman sighed, his shoulders dropping down, "Okay, okay, two against one, not fair by the way," He grumbled before he faced me and I smiled. I edged forward and wrapped my arms around him because he was the best ever and I felt so bad lying to him now.

He hugged me back ever so tightly, "Be careful, okay," He said and I nodded my head, "I will, promise," I said assuringly. I grabbed my backpack and waved them goodbye, Emma and I sharing a knowing look before I turned around and walked out.

One of the drivers dropped me off at the train station, and from there, I made my way to Cambridge. Two hours later, I found myself standing by the university's gate, flooded with a hundred different memories. Most of them were composed of Noah and all the days we spent within the boundaries of this campus.

I pressed my eyes shut, pulling myself through before I stepped ahead. I showed the guards my old student card before I strode inside the campus. Memories kept flooding my mind like a torrential downpour ready to crush me but I kept walking, fighting through every and each one.

The cobblestone pathways echoed with the echoes of footsteps from countless students who had walked these grounds before me. Lush greenery adorned the meticulously manicured lawns, casting dappled shadows in the afternoon sunlight.

I glanced up at the towering spires of the university's buildings, each one a symbol of intellectual pursuit and scholarly achievement. The sight filled me with a sense of nostalgia and longing, reminding me of the countless lectures and late-night study sessions I had experienced within these hallowed halls with both Noah and Sally.

Despite the rush of memories threatening to overwhelm me, I pressed on, determined to reach my destination.

With a steadying breath, I pushed open the door and stepped inside the building, ready to confront whatever lay ahead. The hallway was so familiar, every step I took forward took me a step backward to those old days. The uncountable times I've trodden this path, walking into a trap weaved by the person I thought was the closest to me.

Some professors and assistants passed by me as I walked forward, most of them flashing me a welcoming smile or a nod of recognition, remembering me from back in the day.

Swallowing hard, I turned right and stopped in front of a very familiar door, the nameplate catching my eye. Raising my hand, I knocked softly, just once.

"Come in," Came his bothered voice.

I curled my hand over the knob and opened the door, my eyes falling on him, seated behind his desk, almost like nothing have changed and suddenly I was a student again and he was my professor...and my boyfriend, and the one who got me out of my shell, who made me happy before he plunged me into profound sadness.

Christian's eyes darted from his computer screen to me, his expression registering shock. He rose from his seat so abruptly. "Lilly?" His voice wavered with uncertainty as if he couldn't quite believe I was standing before him.

I smiled and waved my hand, "Hey," I mumbled. My eyes briefly scanned his desk before returning to him. "Are you busy?"

Shaking his head, Christian set aside whatever he had been holding and made his way around the desk, meeting me halfway in his office. "What are you doing here?" He asked.

I shrugged, "Well, I was feeling nostalgic, so I dropped by the campus and thought I'd check if you are here," I said, pointing ahead at him and smiling, "And here you are."

The corner of his lips pulled up just slightly, his gaze flickering over my face, "How are you doing? How have you been?" He whispered.

I nodded, "Good," I said, shrugging, "Well, better," I added and he nodded in understatement.

I sucked in a deep breath, "You didn't come to the funeral," I pointed out.

He nodded, "I thought it was better if I didn't," He shook his head, "You didn't need me in there," He said, probably blaming himself too for Noah's death and I wanted to bolt away from here.

I shook my head, dismissing the topic for now, before my eyes flickered around his office.

Christian followed my gaze, his lips pressing into a thin line, "Now, this is awkward, huh."

I chuckled lowly, "Yeah, the things that happened in this room," I said, scrunching my nose.

Christian chuckled, his eyebrow raising, "If only these walls can speak-"

I shook my head and covered my ears, "I would not want to hear."

A wave of relief washed over his face as he gazed at me, "It's so good to see you, Lilly." He genuinely said.

I nodded, smiling back, "It's good to see you, too," I said, "If you want, we can have a cup of coffee, before I go back," I suggested, and just like I knew he would, he accepted.

"Yeah, sure," He said.

He walked back to his desk and began gathering his belongings. I instinctively moved closer as he retrieved his jacket and phone, my eyes drifting to the small motorbike figurine still standing on his desk – a gift from me, long ago. Running my fingers over its antique edges, I couldn't help but reflect on how crazily different things were just a year ago.

I released the figurine when I felt Christian's gaze on me. Lifting my head to meet his eyes, I noticed a crease forming between his eyebrows as he looked at my hair. Unconsciously, my hand went to my hair, adjusting the blue ribbon tied there.

"Your ribbon," He said, his eyebrows pulled closer as if he was recalling something, "It's cute."

I nodded, "It's my favorite," I said, my inside relaxing and I genuinely smiled, "It's special."

"It must be, or else Chase would've not got back to the cabin to search for it," Christian said, he seemed to be only speaking his thoughts out loud.

My eyebrows pulled closer, "What?"

My words pulled him out of his memory and his eyes left my hair and met mine as he explained, "When I went back to check on what happened to the cabin after we got attacked, I didn't expect to see Chase there as well," He explained, "He said he was searching for something."

"I told him I could help but he wouldn't tell me what he was looking for," Christian stepped forward, he brought his hand up, his finger tracing the ribbon, "Then, he found this," He said, pulling his hand back, looking down at me with profound confusion, "I was confused to be honest, the fact that he came all that way, spend all that time searching for something so little, just a small fabric that he could get anywhere."

"Now, I am guessing it's...more than that."

My insides flipped and I felt myself flailing within, ready to cry and collapse. My heart stung and I curled my hand into a fist, hoping to keep myself intact.

"It's more than that," I mumbled, giving him an answer.

Christian's gaze flickered to my ribbon once more and he nodded his head. Something seemed to die in his gaze all of a sudden. His throat bobbed, his jaw tightening and he turned his gaze away from me, "Shall we?"

Silently, I trailed behind him as we exited the office and made our way down the familiar hallway toward our usual coffee shop. The enticing aroma of freshly brewed coffee enveloped me as we entered and I tried to pull through.

"Go find us a place to sit, I will get us coffee," I announced.

Christian interjected, "No, you go sit, I'll get us-"

I shook my head, cutting him off mid-sentence, "You always got me coffee back in the day, let this one be on me," I smiled, giving him the most innocent look I could pull.

He agreed and went off to secure us a table while I placed our coffee order. When the barista called out my name, I collected the two cups and strolled over to the nearby countertop, I pretended to pick up some napkins and sugar packets. Casually glancing behind me, and checking, I quickly unscrewed the cap, retrieved the vial from my pocket, and discreetly emptied its contents into the coffee.

I fixed the cap and held both cups in hand before I walked back, placing them on the table and taking the seat across from Christian. My heart was beating in my ears now and I almost backed out but I convinced myself that this was unharmful and I pulled through.

I pulled my cup to my side, allowing Christian to pick up his own, "So, when did you get back here?"  I inquired, hoping to spark a conversation.

"About two weeks ago. It was about time I got back to my old routine," he replied, and I nodded in understanding. As I went to take a sip, a knot of anxiety tightened in my stomach, watching him hold the cup without drinking.

"Stalking me got boring, huh?" I quipped, attempting to lighten the mood.

His eyebrow raised, "Yeah, exactly," he responded dryly.

Observing closely, I watched as he finally brought the cup to his lips and took his first sip. My nerves spiked as I noticed a furrow forming between his eyebrows, and he glanced down at the cup, inspecting its contents.

"It's your favorite," I said, too fast.

His gaze shifted to meet mine, and he nodded, "Yeah, it is, thanks," he replied, nudging his cup forward to clink it against mine before he took another sip.

I held my breath; I hope this ends well.

************************************

Hey!

I hope you liked the chapter, do tell me your thoughts about how things are progressing ;)

Imma ask it again; Team Nik&Ronald or Team Emma&Alex&Lilly? xD

For those who keep asking about Nik and Nathan and their past; they are all mentioned in my other book, reading it will help you better understand things around here.

Anyway, this book will end so soon and I am so happy! BECAUSE FINALLY I WILL
BE FREE OF THIS MESS!

See ya soon :)