Beside You (songfic)

Song: Beside You by 5 Seconds of Summer

Within a minute I was all packed up, I've got a ticket to another world, I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go.

She smiled sadly as he put his bags in the car, a bright smile on his face.

He hugged her.

"I'll miss you!"

"I'll miss you too."

Silent words are hard to speak when your thoughts are all I see, don't ever leave, she said to me.

"Why didn't you just tell him you loved him?" Jackson asked as they sat in her house, tissues littering the floor and she was wrapped in a blanket, lack of sleep evident in her eyes.

"It's not that easy. I tried to stop him, but no one can stop someone who is reaching for their goals."

When we both fall asleep underneath the same sky, to the beat of our hearts at the same time, so close but so far away, can you hear me?

She stared at the ceiling, imagining him in his own bed doing the same thing, their hearts beating together as one.

They were so close, so close to being together,

But he ruined it all.

She sleeps alone, my heart wants to come home, I wish I was, I wish I was, beside you. She lies awake trying to find the words to say, I wish I was, I wish I was, beside you.

He looks at the spot next to him, wishing she was there to sing with him before they went to sleep, snacks littered on the bed.

She picks up her phone and goes to their messages, I wish I was beside you still, she wrote, quickly deleting it after and shutting off her phone.

"No, you have to be strong."

Another day and I'm somewhere new, I made a promise that I'll come home soon, bring me back, bring me back to you.

She sighed as she recalled the day he told her he was leaving.

She begged him not to go.

He told her he'd be home soon.

Soon turned into years.

When we both wake up, underneath the same sign, time stops, I wish that I could rewind, so close but so far away.

Two years,

Two years he had been gone.

He moved from China to South Korea to peruse a career, leaving her behind.

He was finally debuting, she didn't know.

She opens her eyes to see his dog beside her, the one she promise she would take care of, the one that was slowly dying.

She couldn't bring herself to tell him.

Time seemed to stop as she laid there, wishing that she had continued to beg and never gave up, never let him go, never told him she loved him and had for so long.

They still takes whenever he could, she felt so close to him, still saying the same inside jokes,

yet so far away, like she was just a person and it didn't really matter anymore.

She sleeps alone, my heart wants to come home, I wish I was, I wish I was beside you. She lies awake, I'm trying to find the words to say, I wish I was, I wish I was beside you.

"You need to stop lying awake thinking of him," Jackson scolded when she came into the café, her bags still visible under the makeup she put on.

"It's not that easy, Jackson."

"It could be, if you try."

She glanced at him before putting her apron on and naw tag.

"I don't want to try."

"Did you tell him yet?"

She stopped walking towards the door.

"No, I can't. Even if I could, he hasn't answer me. Jackson, I feel like we are still so close, but too far away, it's like he barely remembers me anymore. I wonder if he still tries to tell me he wishes he was beside me like I am."

Jackson watched as she opened the door and closed it after herself before he shook his head and followed.

The pieces of us both under every city light and the shining as we faded into the dark.

She tried to smile,

She really did.

He didn't tell her he debuted,

He didn't tell her his bandmates' names,

He didn't even say hello to her anymore.

Now this?

The darkness of the street was calming to her, the one light she sat under, flickering.

She sighed and shook her head before walking away, the flickering stopping as she faded to the dark.

She sleeps alone, my heart wants to come home, I wish I was, I wish I was. She sleeps, alone, my heart wants to come home, I wish I was, I wish I was beside you.

Jackson helped her get her luggage out of the back of his car.

It had been four years since he left her.

Jackson had left a year before to South Korea as well, and now she followed, not being able to live in China anymore.

Jackson's friends smiled at her as she got out of the car, introducing themselves.

She introduced herself back, not even smiling for a minute.

She missed him still.

She lies awake, I'm trying to find the words to say, I wish I was, I wish I was beside you. She lies awake, beside you. I wish I was, I wish I was.

"Hello, welcome to Fantasies," she bowed.

Jackson and her had opened a café with his other friends.

It was very popular since it had food from many different cultures, Chinese, Korean, American, and Thai.

He gaped at her as his bandmates went up to order.

She looked different,

She was skinnier, an unhealthy skinny, and pale too. Her makeup didn't hide the bags under her eyes well. Her hair was a lot longer and bleach blond, her black roots showing a little.

She stopped working when she saw him standing there.

"Noona?" One of his bandmates called and she turned to him.

"Are you okay? You look sick," he frowned.

She mustered up a smile, as best she could.

"I wish I could say I was, I'm not sick, but I'm not okay either."

"Noona come sit with us," another of his bandmates said, grabbing her hand.

"Jackson, I'll be back in a minute!" She yelled over her shoulder in Mandarin.

"Got it! Don't worry about it! Hyung is coming soon!" He yelled back from the kitchen.

"You speak Mandarin, noona?" A soft voice asked from next to him.

"I'm from China," she confirmed, sitting on the edge of the booth, feeling uncomfortable.

"Noona tell us why you look sad," the first boy said from next to her.

She glanced at him.

"It's complicated and a long story, there is no need to share."

"Joshua hyung help us," the younger ones whined after she wouldn't budge.

"If she doesn't want to say it, don't force her," Joshua said before turning back to his food.

"I'll tell you one thing," she said and the boys all turned to her.

"I wish I was beside him still."

With that, she got up and walked back to the counter.

She sleeps alone, my heart wants to come home, I wish I was, I wish I was.