CHAPTER 6 | DON'T GO

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  Lauren's stomps echoed through the empty prison block. She angrily strut through her cell entryway and snatched her backpack. Hesitating for a second, she thought about what she was doing, but shook those feelings off and grabbed some of her things. One feeling washed over her that she couldn't shake off.

A feeling of loneliness.

It felt like a pit of darkness grew in her stomach, as she bit the edge of her dry lip. Should I leave? She questioned.

I hate feeling like this. She thought again. Lauren started to pack more of her things in her backpack before one last sentence kept stinging her thoughts.

Don't go.

An angry whimper escaped her as she fell to the cell floor, leaning her head against the wall. She placed her head in her hands as she sat in silence, silently begging for her mind to shut up. The thought wouldn't leave her mind, until she grabbed her backpack and threw everything out of it.

The thought stopped.

Loneliness was like a drug, but so was company. After she had a dose of people, she couldn't go back to being alone; she needed her sanity. Being alone for so long makes you do things, makes you a new person. Bitterness and blood thirst took over her, there was no stopping the monster growing in the pit of her stomach.

It was selfish, to think that after seeing how advanced this shelter was, that she would just leave it. How dare she miss her chance of recovery, being starved for twelve days should have put some sense into her. Even if she was strong in her body, she was weak in her soul. A few more weeks alone would have killed her if she didn't find food.

Lauren glanced to the floor to see her journal, opened up to the page with the names. Letting out a deep and jagged breath, she stared coldly at the last two names on the page that weren't crossed out.

There was another reason she had to stay with these people, because whether or not she liked it, she was determined to find her parents. They were Lauren's last chance for hope.

➸ ➸ ➸

After deciding to stay at the prison, she went back to the scene and found out that Patrick started the whole outbreak, but he wasn't bit. It was some kind of infection. And they were already exposed to it.

Lauren was walking behind Rick out of the cell block, averting her eyes to where Carl and Maggie were helping Michonne walk, since she hurt something. Rick told Carl to stay back, but he hugged him anyway.

"I had to use one of the guns by the gate, I swear I didn't want to." Carl stated, finally backing away from his possibly infected father.

"I was coming back," Michonne spoke up, "I fell, they came out and helped me. Even her." She finished while gesturing towards Lauren. She glanced up for a second as everyone's eyes were on her, but soon turned away to look somewhere else, even if she could feel Carl's innocent eyes on her.

"You alright?" Rick asked. Michonne nodded in response.

"What happened in there?" Maggie questioned.

There was a moment of silence before Rick spoke up. "Patrick got sick last night. Some kind of flu, moves fast. We think he died and attacked the cell block." Lauren hoped that she wasn't infected, but it wouldn't matter if she died anyway.

"Look, I know he was your friend, and I'm sorry, he was a good kid," Rick sympathized to Carl. "We lost a lot of good people."

"Glenn and your dad are okay, but they were in there. You shouldn't get too close to anyone that might of been exposed. At least for a little while."

Lauren glanced upwards to see Carl go back under Michonne's arm to help her stand.

"Carl, all o' you," he finished as the three of them walked off. He then turned to Lauren with worried eyes.

"You...might be infected too." He stated. The girl simply nodded and went to the fence. At least there she would be away from anyone.

➸ ➸ ➸

The camp was packed. Lauren must have fell asleep again on the drive there, since she woke up suddenly.

"Get out," the man in the back with her ordered, and the poor girl quickly nodded and frantically got out of the car. That was the same man that hit her. She felt bile rise up in her throat, but she was so tired. Nothing came out.

"This is our camp, please, follow me," Joe ordered, Lauren folding her arms around herself. She didn't respond to Joe, but she still followed. She didn't have to turn around to know that the man who hit her was following too. She called him Mo for the time being; it rhymed with Joe, which amused her. Her stomach twisted into knots at the thought of amusement. Her friends had been a pile of bodies not too long ago, how could she think anything was funny?

"This is where we train people, you'll learn here too," Joe explained, pointing to an area where teenagers and young adults where learning to shoot and fight. Maybe this place wasn't so bad after all.

Joe continued his tour. "These are all our tents, you can occupy this one, with Ana and her mother, Josephine."

A woman exited a dark blue tent. She had blonde, frizzy hair. Freckles her placed all along her cheeks, and dark circles embedded her eyes. She looked tired, but a smile was still placed on her face. Lauren guessed that she was in her late forties. Josephine reminded Lauren of Sarah, something that made her feel sick inside.

"Hey Joe," Josephine greeted, her voice sounding more flirtatious than what a normal friendly greeting would be. Lauren's eyebrows scrunched up, she looked familiar. Memories of the night before flooded her brain, Lauren remembered now. Josephine was the woman who pleaded Joe to not kill her.

There was fresh pools of blood on the floor, but she couldn't see anybody dead. Standing with their backs faced to her, were unrecognizable men. Sarah stood there, bloodshot eyes and shaking hands raised above her head. She was at gunpoint, by a man with grey hair. One loud bang, the body hit the ground. Lauren choked back her tears, screams erupting from her.

Bodies turned, panic erupted. The men stepped back, and the bodies of everyone else were there. A man grabbed her, but did nothing; all Lauren could focus on was her still friend's body on the ground, and the pile of bodies of her new friends and family in the corner. A woman screamed, something about not killing her. She was only a child, after all. Her body was dragged, Lauren wouldn't stop screaming. Her throat was dry, but that didn't stop her. Lauren's feet dragged along the grass, she was now outside in the cold fall air; she felt like throwing up.

Lauren shut her eyes tight, excluding the flashbacks from her mind. Lauren held back a scream.

"Hey there honey, remember me?" Josephine questioned while facing towards Lauren. She nodded subtly. Another figure exited the tent, but this was a shorter person.

It was a young girl, probably Lauren's age. This must have been Ana. She had straight, frizzy blonde hair, also with freckles like her mother. You could tell they were related. She had innocent features, with scared brown eyes. They found Lauren, and they weren't as scared as they were now.

Lauren glanced behind her to see Joe giving Josephine a kiss. Lauren turned back to Ana in disgust.

"Joe's not my dad," Ana finally spoke, her voice sounding raw, but sweet. "My dad left us when I was young, I don't remember him," she continued.

"I'm Ana, what's your name?" She asked, she seemed to be shy, but still social.

"Lauren," she finally spoke, her voice dry and weak from screaming the night before.

"Do you wanna practice shooting? It's almost 12 o'clock, this is when I usually practice," Ana asked, and Lauren nodded, even if she wanted to sleep. Lauren felt a bit more comfortable with the fact that another kid like her was here.

They walked to the shooting range, targets set up far back. Lauren winced at the sound of gunshots, an older boy shooting a few ranges down.

"Don't worry, we have headphones to go over your head, it loud for me too," Ana explained as she noticed Lauren's wince. Lauren smiled weakly for a second, while Ana handed over large, bright yellow headphones. Lauren placed it above her head, Ana doing the same.

Ana explained what to shoot with and how to shoot for awhile, before demonstrating. Lauren knew some of the basics, remembering Sarah teaching her. She wanted to forget those memories, they hurt Lauren.

Finally, it was Lauren's turn to try. Her hands shook slightly, but she still attempted to aim. With only five bullets in her clip, Lauren attempted to shoot. The first four bullets didn't end up on the target, but the last bullet got close to the middle. When Ana went before, she had gotten three bullets into the target. Ana clapped for Lauren, making her smile lightly.

"Good job, that was impressive," Lauren suddenly heard behind her. Joe smiled, and stepped closer.

"What was your name again?" He asked.

"Lauren."

➸ ➸ ➸

Lauren heard Maggie scream from across the yard. "Rick! Daryl!" Her voice shook Lauren from her daze. She glanced to the other side of the fence, which was packed with walkers. It seemed to look like the fence would collapse at any minute from the weight the walkers were putting on the fence. Lauren rushed over to where Maggie was, Rick and Daryl doing the same. Lauren didn't care if she didn't call for her, she would help any way she could.

"This part's starting to give," she shouted over the walker's moans as they reached her side of the fence. Rick then noticed that Lauren was here.

"What the hell...Lauren go back, we got this."

"If you want me to stay you gotta trust me and let me help," She mumbled, but her voice was still audible over the walker's voices.

Rick shook his head in aggravation and continued over to where Maggie was. Lauren looked past the fence and into the distance to see hoards of walkers coming their way. Where the hell did they come from?

Looking behind her, Lauren saw more people coming to help. Tightening the grip on the pole Lauren was using, she started to get rid of some. Even with the amount of people helping, more and more walkers came. The fence just wouldn't stop giving in. Lauren attempted to drown out the loud sounds that were banging in her ears. from the sounds of poles jabbing into skulls, to the rattling of the fence, and the grated voices of the walkers.

"Are you seeing this?" A dark skinned woman asked. Lauren forgot her name. Everyone turned to see a trail of bloody rats, they were pretty teared up.

"Someone feeding these things?" She questioned again. Lauren squinted her eyes at the rats, inspecting them. If someone was feeding rats to them, there was a psycho living here.

Lauren was excluding herself.

"This part of the fence, now!" She heard someone yell as a part of the fence started sinking even lower. Everyone gathered even closer together and got rid of some walkers in that area; it was no use. Nothing was going to keep these things back, so they started dropping their weapons and pushed on the fence. Lauren tried with what force she had, until Daryl ordered everyone to go back. She could feel her check rise up and down at a fast pace, attempting to catch her breath.

Even if Lauren was strong and forceful, she had her limits. She was only a kid after all, she didn't have the strength of an adult.

"If they bend the fence like that those walker's are comin' over it," a women exclaimed as everyone was lost for answers.

"Daryl, get the truck. I know what to do," Rick stated as Daryl followed his orders. Lauren let out a deep sigh, figuring they had it under control.

"You can go now, if you want," Rick explained to her. She was reluctant,  but Lauren finally nodded and headed back to the cell block. Halfway there, she turned to see that Rick's plan was to attract walkers away from the fence with a pig. Lauren had no remorse for the pig. She probably wouldn't feel any different if it was a human.

The cries of the pig was what got to her. Not because it was getting hurt, but the squeals were a reminder of things Lauren kept out of her mind.

Dark room. Loud scream. Impact.

Lauren shut her eyes, clenching her fists till her fingernails dug into her skin. That was the first time in a long time she had to stop the pain of the memory.

She needed to leave, but where to?

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[2271 WORDS]

a/n: soooo with the dark room loud scream thing, thats a recurring issue lauren has throughout the fanfic, basically you'll find out soon in the flashbacks what has happened with her but the main issue of the fanfic is lauren battling between if she is a villain or a victim. carl will help her figure that out :)

also i love when u guys comment because it shows that you really care, and i love hearing your feedback so please feel free to comment!