The green and gold and vanilla room in the mansion house hasn't changed at all since you left.

It's still warm, forest-and-earth shaded comfort that smells like cinnamon rolls and love. Sunlight still streams in the same way through the window, glimmering on the splotches of gold that stitch through the bed's blankets.

In the midst of all these familiar surroundings, it's you who doesn't feel the same.

Idly, you trace a gold-veined thread in an uneven zigzag across the comforter with your finger; a lone, pale traveler traipsing down a razor-thin road.

Eventually, the road ends, diving into the depths of brown and green and cloth.

Your finger remains at the end of the gold thread, unsure of where to go next while the road before it dissolves into nothing.

You draw back your hand and clench it.

"Hey. Stop that."

The cracked door swings open, and Hoseok
bounces in.

His tattoos flow down his wrists and throat in the same way he moves; starkly and smoothly -a whopping, undeniable presence.

He throws himself onto the bed beside you and slaps your fisted hand.

You draw said hand back to your chest, wincing at the slight sting. "I'm not doing anything."

"Yes, you are," says Hoseok. He taps the end of your nose, like you're a misbehaving child. "You're worrying."

You purse your lips and turn your head away.

He's right.

You are worrying.

But how can you not?

In the aftermath of the hotel fight, the eight of you were lucky to escape as unscathed as you did.

Namjoon, with a broken left arm.

Yoongi and Jin and Hoseok and Jimin, scrapes and bruises and blood patching across every visible part of their skin.

You, too, have angry purple bruises that ring in large handprints around your throat; the indent of a dog collar that wrenched too tight for too long, and was finally removed.

But two were worse than the rest of you.

Taehyung, and Jungkook.

Down the hall and in a room to your left is where Taehyung is resting, sequestered in his room like a nocturnal animal hiding from the sun. Jimin is with him, and has been with him, and will be with him until his mental state is stable enough to return.

You visited once when Taehyung was sleeping.

Inside the dimness of his bedroom, he was nothing more than a tiny lump beneath a mountain of blankets, his arms wrapped tight around Jimin, who sat white-faced and solemn beside where he laid.

It's been three days, but Taehyung hasn't said a word to any of you.

"Is it..." You trail off, throat thick with the implications of his silence. "Did Jin find out about Tae? Did they...do something to him? So that he can't talk?"

Or is it that he just doesn't want to?

Hoseok shifts back, crossing one leg beneath him. "Jin hyung said his vocal chords look fine. His throat doesn't seem to have any damage - nothing that should be inhibiting his speech, anyway. It's all surface injuries. Except in here." Hoseok taps his head with one finger.

You look down. Your finger finds a new thread to follow. "And...Jungkook?"

Hoseok's eyes gentle, mellow into a soft darkness.

"He's sleeping," he says, muted and low. "Just like he was when you left him yesterday. It isn't a crime to leave him for a while, Y/N."

You follow his glance to the rumpled sheets on the bed, a warm hole that you crawled out of not even an hour ago.

It was the first time you'd slept since leaving the hotel three days ago.

After an impromptu surgery performed in a makeshift emergency room in the house's basement to remove the bullet, followed by a blood transfusion, Jungkook is stable.

He sleeps all day, awakening only long enough for Doctor Jin to shove a cocktail of pain pills and Gatorade down his throat.

He's going to be fine.

Even though his shoulder and left upper chest will forever be a messy mass of scar tissue, he's going to be fine.

You kept telling yourself that, but somehow it doesn't lessen your worry.

You were afraid that the moment you stepped outside the door of Jungkook's room, the easy rise and fall of his chest would stop.

"Am I allowed back in yet?" you question in a mutter.

Hoseok snorts. "As far as I know, Yoongi's standing guard at the door. You might want to wait for a while until Jin hyung gives you the go ahead."

You refused to leave until Jin recruited to Namjoon to lumber in and physically force you from the room.

Now here you sit, heavy with a jumble of worry, lost in the oblivious wasteland that your mind has become.

You want to see him again.

But you have to hold yourself back - he needs rest. You need rest too.

"Fine," you grumble. "Tyrants. If they insist."

A small laugh from Hoseok draws your gaze to him, the where his eyes crinkle above the sharp peaks of his cheekbones.

"Are you alright?" you ask quietly.

His smile doesn't dim in the slightest. Instead, Hoseok simply shrugs. "It wasn't a big deal," he says.

Not a big deal. He finally gets revenge on the man who killed his family, and he calls it 'not a big deal'.

You shake your head, an unexpected grin floating to your lips.

How Hoseok of him.

"Don't laugh at me," Hoseok giggles. Then he pauses, and his laugh fades, face growing somber.

"It really isn't a big deal," he says. "I decided a long time ago that there were more important things in life than revenge."

That's right.

Going into this situation, even as far as back as the first time you met, Hoseok had known that your father was the one who murdered his family.

For a moment, you can only marvel at the man beside you. Here he is, beside the daughter of his family's murderer, and he's never treated you with anything but kindness and gentleness.

"Thank you for everything." You drop your head onto Hoseok's shoulder. "I hope you know how incredible you are."

He shakes his head. "Not me," he whispers. "If I hadn't found all of you back then, I'd be a monster. This family saved me."

You don't know what to say that, as the feeling resonates in you.

This family saved you, too.

The silence between you is peaceful and sure, a blanket of softness coating your broiling emotions and soothing them.

"Anyways, how are you?" Hoseok asks. "You're so worried about everyone else that you aren't thinking about yourself."

"Me?" You question. "I'm fine. Why?"

Hoseok lifts his eyebrows, and the disappear under his low-hanging brunette bangs. "Why? Your father just died. Aren't you upset?"

Upset?

You sit back for a moment to reflect upon the mass of feelings inside you, shuffling through the tangles to probe for something resembling upset.

Yeah, there's a slight tinge of fear from that part of you that's waiting for Taehyung or Jungkook to drop dead, and that pang of confusion that bounces between your love for Jungkook and your hurt that he was involved in your grandfather's death.

There's also the overwhelming relief that floods all of you, because you've all made it out alive.

Upset isn't showing itself anywhere.

Eventually, you give the search up.

There's nothing inside of you that's upset about your father's death. Maybe, before all of this happened, you could've scrounged up some kind of sympathy, or maybe even tears.

Not now.

Thinking back, he was never your father. Cold, unaffectionate, utterly neglectful.

You were simply a prize show animal to him.

In the way it counts, he was never your family.

The only family you had before now was...

You gasp. "Jisoo!"

Hoseok's brow furrows. "Ji-Who?"

"My cousin, Jisoo!" You grab Hoseok's arm. "She helped me get out! What will happen to her now that my father's gone?"

You have to call her, or find her, or something.

If the rest of the gang has scattered, then where will your cousin be left?

"Calm down," soothes Hoseok. "I'm sure she's fine. She's probably hiding out somewhere, figuring stuff out. We can try to find her."

You nod enthusiastically, and open your mouth to respond just as a knock sounds at the door.

Simultaneously , you and Hoseok turn.

It's Yoongi, hovering in the door with crossed arms.

"Jungkook's awake," he says. "And Y/N, he's asking for you."

[A/N]
Unedited

Guys, I'm sorry for the wait. I've moved, started at a new school, half of Houston flooded, and now my grandparents have been struggling with their health. My grandmother is actually scheduled to have surgery tomorrow, so I wanted to try to get this put up beforehand so I can be free to help her around.

Thank you guys for your patience. For those of you who have asked if me or my family have been affected by the flooding, I can say with great relief that we have not. All of our houses are on fairly high ground. Thank you guys for taking care of me and worrying. I love y'all ❤️❤️❤️

<3 pocketbangtan

PS: before all this happened, I dyed my hair pink hehe you can go see on my insta @vl_bow