Aidan

Aidan didn't know if he was mad, sad, or afraid. Probably all of the above. And if he were to be honest, he was also ashamed. James wanted him to spend some time with his companion and Aidan had ruined this moment when he had lost his temper. He couldn't face James the next day being so on edge. So he fed that night. Another face to add to the evergrowing list of his ghosts.

Then he must have fallen asleep because the bright sun of the day was shining when knocks on the door woke him up. He opened, finding James, and slid a hand in his tousled hair sheepishly, before letting him in without a word.

Aidan sat on an armchair facing James. "I'm sorry."

James stayed silent, his eyes peering through Aidan's uneasy expression. Then he frowned, stood up, came closer to Aidan, and leaned over him as if to kiss Aidan's neck, while the older vampire shrank into the armchair. James took a deep breath, his hair brushing over Aidan's skin, and he hissed. He pulled away and crouched in front of his best friend. "You're drinking human blood again."

It was not a question. Aidan looked away and stood up to avoid the overwhelming presence of his best friend next to him.

James took his hand. "I'm not accusing you. I'm just... worried. Why didn't you tell me you were struggling?"

Aidan tossed a hand in the air. "I don't want to be this burden to you. I'll always fall back. I'm a failure. There's nothing else to say."

James' look turned stern. "Stop being stupid. You are not a failure. We always knew it would be more difficult for you and that a relapse was a possibility. You need more time. I know you're trying. But you can't stay alone with this."

"Well, maybe I have to," Aidan snapped. And he couldn't stop his words after that. "I'm happy for you. Really. And you don't need me. I understand. You can't be stuck with a broody wreck like me. It would be unfair. And so I have to function on my own, because when..."

James stopped him with a gesture of his hand. He stood up and paced the room angrily. "You're unbelievable. I am not leaving you. Ever. My relationship with Tommaso has nothing to do with our friendship. I never said or did anything that could let you think otherwise. It's in your head, Aidan."

"It's true, you didn't. But..."

"But what? Don't you trust me?"

Aidan's expression faltered. "I do. Of course I do."

"I. am. not. Leaving. You. Is that clear? Life would be dull and boring without you, you self-deprecating prick."

Aidan couldn't help but chuckle and it seemed like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He said soflty: "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, yeah," James waved his hand. "Is all this the reason why you went to this guy? The painter?"

Aidan shook his head. "No. It's not like that. I want to learn with him. That's all."

"I'm glad for you. I was just worried because he could be dangerous. You know how it is. You cannot trust a vampire you have just met."

"I know. And I don't trust him. I'll be cautious."

"Alright then. And you are not a burden. Never was. Never will be." After a pause, James put his hands on his hips. "Now, about the blood. I'll stay with you for a few days."

Aidan smiled sadly before hiding his face with his hand and sighing.

"Come on, it's going to be fine," James whispered and he took Aidan in his arms. "I am here for you, and I will always be. As you are for me."