I know, I know. I'm updating AGAIN and I'm totally amazing.

Jkjk, but seriously, I'm surprised I actually had people waiting for this book! It makes me so happy :))) <3

Enjoy!

~

I need to get to the bottom of this, and there's only one person I know who's been in a similar situation: Zayn.

But it's also a problem for later. I have to put all my focus into school this week and worry about it during the weekend. Don't you wish education could just be put on pause for a second?

I call Niall the next day instead of that night. I tell him that I was exhausted and passed out, but in reality, I was too anxious. We didn't even talk for long but it was nice to hear his voice, even if we made the most awkward small talk.

How did Harry manage to pop back into my life without even trying? He probably doesn't even know he's fucking doing it, which is more infuriating.

And of course, it's at a time where I'm finally moving on.

Thursday night rolls around and Sonia and I head down to the dining hall. I want to tell her about these hallucinations I've been having, but she'll twist it into a weird sign. I'd rather not tell Macy because she's strictly on team Laine and I know she'll brush them off.

I realize this is something only Audrey would understand.

We force the dry chicken down and spoil ourselves with ice cream for dessert. When we're done, I split, telling her I'm meeting up with someone. She goes back to the room and I make my way to a random area on campus.

I find a bench amongst a grassy area and take a seat. I dial Audrey's number and wait for her to pick up.

"If you're still mad I'm gonna hang up," is the first thing she says when she picks up.

"No, I'm not, but I have a problem," I huff.

I can imagine her sitting up and giving me her undivided attention. "What's up?"

"Okay, this is weird, but I keep getting these vivid hallucinations of him."

"Who?" She pauses and thinks it over. "Oh! Harry, duh. Oh wow... what kind?"

"Well, I was Laine and when he kissed me, I felt like it was Harry. I even heard his voice. And then..." I trail off, not telling her about the shower scene. That would be a little TMI.

"Then what?"

"Then it disappeared when I opened my eyes. It was so weird, dude."

"Hm, ironic how it's only happening when you have another man in your life. Damn that prick acts possessive even when he's not there."

I can't help but giggle. Her logic, although it doesn't make sense, really describes Harry's essence.

"That's funny," I laugh, with her joining in. "But I'm worried. What if never stops?"

"Babe, I wish I could tell you that it does, but I have no idea. I don't have experience in the field."

"I know," I sigh. Of course, she wouldn't have the answers. How could she?

As the week goes on, all hallucinations are gone. They magically disappear. Coincidentally, I don't see Laine throughout this whole time. He skipped Chem for whatever reason.

Friday night appears way too quickly, not that I'm complaining. Weekends are always welcome after a week of school.

"I was thinking about going home this weekend," I say nonchalantly. I'm in my room, lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling. One hand occupies a stress ball that I've been tossing up and down as a distraction.

Sonia looks up from her laptop and narrows her eyes. "Are you feeling okay? You want to voluntarily go home?"

"Yeah... why is that weird?" I ask, confused.

"You complained all winter break that you wanted to leave," she scoffs, closing her MacBook and turning toward me. She has a good point. "What's wrong?"

I decide to vary the truth. "Well, there's something I need to research and I can only do it from home." Then I furrow my brows in thought, tuning Sonia's questions out.

Even if I somehow did manage to get in touch with Zayn, who's to say he won't go and tell Harry about it? The thought of being vulnerable like that... I can't.

I need a new plan.

"Nevermind," I cut her off. "I actually realized I have some assignments I need to finish tonight. I'll see you later." I hop off my bed and stuff my laptop into my backpack before leaving my room.

I walk without a destination. I just needed to get out of that room, away from all the questions.

A breath of fresh air should do me good.

I don't know what to do and who to ask. I remember Gemma had mentioned something about not being able to be with her soulmate, but she's closer to Harry than Zayn.

Louis had hit a rough patch with Eleanor... maybe he has more experience with this. Then again, I don't know where his loyalties lie.

Also, I'm thinking of all these scenarios as if I have contact with these people. When I changed my number, I essentially deleted everyone's numbers so I'd never slip up and call them.

Guess that was a dumb mistake.

You know, maybe if I ignore the problem long enough, it'll go away.

That sounds legit, right?

My phone buzzes and I check my messages.

Macy: What's the party plan for tonight?

Me: Actually not feeling up for it.

My phone starts ringing and Macy's cute contact picture pops up. It's one of her dressed in PJs, drooling over a plate of cookies. I took it when the three of us decided to have an impromptu sleepover in my room.

"Hey."

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" she asks right away. I'm touched by her concern and a little disturbed that me skipping out on a party deems for that level of worry.

"I'm fine! Just feeling socially drained. I think I'm gonna spend the night in." It's not a total lie.

"Aw," she huffs. "Okay, well if you need anything, let me know."

"Bye," I smile and hang up.

Wait a second... Louis might have loyalty to Harry but Eleanor would probably keep my secret! We haven't talked in so long...

I'm sure Niall would have her number...

I really debate it out. Okay, pros: I could talk to her, get my questions answered, maybe explain myself? Cons: she could tell Louis who would tell Harry, she's never experienced it and thinks I'm crazy, she doesn't wanna talk.

Okay, so I'm not too crazy about the idea. I don't think slowly letting them back in my life is gonna solve anything, and it defeats the purpose as a whole. Even with Niall, I gotta keep the contact at a minimum. I did this for a reason and I need to keep it as is.

My phone buzzes again, drawing me out of my thoughts.

Laine: Hey, was wondering if you're free tonight?

Me: Not really down for the party scene tonight (SHOCKER!) but maybe another night?

Laine: Who said anything about a party.

I bite back a smile as I text him back.

Me: What'd you have in mind?

He takes a minute to respond.

Laine: We're not hosting a party tonight if you wanna come over

Why not? At least I can grill him about missing chemistry. Besides, I could use the distraction.

Me: Sure. I'll meet you there.

He types for a solid 30 seconds, but then the bubbles disappear. Instead, I get a thumbs-up emoji.

I try not to overthink it as I basically sprint back to my dorm. Sonia looks at me with wide eyes as I barge in and start scrambling through my closet.

"Laine," I explain as I pull out cute outfits.

"Ah," she nods and watches me in amusement. I probably look like a madman.

I decide to go with something casual. Jeans and a sweater should be fine, considering we're going to his place.

I scatter around as I jump into my jeans. I nearly trip, saving myself at the last moment. Then, I refresh my mascara and run my hands through my hair. It barely touches my shoulders, so there's not much I can do anyway.

"Okay, I have to go," I sing, grabbing my keys. "Love you, see you later."

"Bye! Have fun!"

I close the door behind me and sprint downstairs. I bump into someone on the way out and casually apologize before starting to run again.

I finally reach my car and climb in. I do a little happy dance behind the wheel before turning the engine on and driving to his frat.

It's not too far and I could have walked, but I rather not walk off campus at night. There are creeps lingering around, waiting to snatch up innocent girls.

I pull into the first open spot I see and text Laine that I'm here. Not even a minute later, he shows up at the doorway.

"Hey," he grins, holding the door open for me.

"Hi," I smile back, him on my trail. "Wow, this place looks different in normal lighting." It's much cleaner than I expected. The living room is organized with a flat-screen TV on the wall. The house seems pretty empty, as expected for a Friday night. 

"I may have roped in a few guys to help me clean before you came," he sheepishly replies.

My eyes go wide. "Wait, actually?"

"Yeah..."

A laugh escapes my lips. "Hm, you're definitely impressing me more every day."

He smiles and leads me upstairs to his bedroom. Although I've been in it, I barely remember the way. I'm pretty sure I was at least tipsy that night.

"Welcome to mi casa," he dramatically opens the door to his bedroom.

"Woooooow," I say sarcastically.

"You don't like?"

"I mean, it's pretty ordinary for a dude," I walk in and look around. Yup, typical frat bedroom, but cleaner. He has a Saturdays are for the Boys tapestry and those LED color strips around the walls. He even has the plaid bed sheets. "Seriously, like I'm pretty sure every guy here has the same setup."

He acts offended. "What?"

"Dude, I could have guessed what your room would look like before I even walked in."

I hesitantly take a seat on his bed and pray it's clean. He throws himself on his bed, almost crushing me in the process. I squeal and push him toward the other side. He readjusts himself and waves a remote in my face.

"What do you wanna watch?"

"Anything really." His face turns into despair and I know that's not what he wanted to hear. "Uh, okay. How about a comedy?"

"Thank you for narrowing it down," he says sarcastically as he scrolls through the genre on Netflix. After fifteen minutes of searching, we're still movie-less.

We decide on some cringe romance movie that sucks ass. Like honestly, I've never seen worse production quality. It was called After or something like that.

The credits finally roll around and I peep my head out from under the blanket. The amount of second-hand embarrassment I got was ridiculous. The acting was horrid and the plot was all out confusing.

"What, you didn't like it?" Laine grins. "That could be us, you know." I playfully smack him but my heart skips a beat.

"Yes, a toxic college couple, so cute," I say sarcastically.

He chuckles, vibrating the whole bed. "I meant the frat boy and nerdy girl."

This time I hit him harder. "I am not nerdy!"

"Sure you're not."

"Listen, a nerd would be good at chem, right? I suck at it," I remind him of our grueling study sessions where I'm the one asking all the questions.

He playfully taps his chin. "Hmm... I don't know. Nerds can be bad at one subject." I pretend to hit him again and he grabs my hand before I can make contact, as if I actually would. "Did you know this movie is actually based on a fanfiction?"

"Oh?" I say, waiting for him to elaborate. I grab the soda from his bedside table that he originally brought for himself and take a sip.

"Mhm, it was a Harry Styles fanfic."

I spit the coke out of my mouth so fast.

"My sister was a fan... Jeez, El!"

"I'm sorry," my voice raises in pitch. "Shit, sorry."

"It's okay," he laughs. "Guess it's laundry night." I get off the bed and he follows, stripping the blanket off the bed. Even though it's the only thing that got wet, he strips his sheets as well and tosses them in a hamper. He then strides to his closet and pulls out a second set.

I ogle at his muscles as they flex to reach the upper part of his closet. I remind myself to close my mouth before he catches me gawking.

"You gonna help?" He gestures to the bed.

"That's sexist," I blatantly say.

He narrows his eyes at me. "What? No. I just meant..."

"I'm kidding, Laine," I break out into a smile and relief spreads over his face. "I suck at making beds though."

"It's okay, we got this!" His enthusiasm is cute so I don't dare disappoint.

I laugh and grab a corner. I start tucking it in when I get another intense vision.

It's of Harry and I after I moved into the apartment. He was helping me unpack, and we couldn't get the sheets on for the life of us. I was so annoyed I decided to give up.

I see blips of the memory. His hand sneakily touching mine, our laughter blending into one, his bright smile. At one point his green look at me so lovingly that I forget it's not real.

I gasp as I'm pulled out of the vision. Laine's standing by my side now, concern etched on his face.

"Are you okay?"

I nod and hold on to him for dear life trying to steady myself.

"Woah woah, sit down." He guides me to the bed and I sit on the uncovered mattress. "I'm gonna bring you some water, okay?"

I nod and watch his retreating figure leave the room. I grip my head in an attempt to control the lightheadedness.

He rushes back in with a cold bottle of water. I gladly take it and gulp it down. He takes it from me when I'm done and puts it on the bedside table.

"Sorry, I just get these dizzy spells," I lie.

"Don't apologize. Are you okay?" he asks sincerely. His concern makes my heart warm.

"I'm good, thank you."

He takes my hand in his and kisses it. For a moment, his face morphs into Harry's. I rapidly blink and his face changes back.

"I don't think you should drive back. Spend the night here."

"Oh, I don't know..." I trail.

He stubbornly shakes his head. "It's late anyway. I'll grab some clothes for you." I don't argue because I don't have the chance to.

He searches through his dresser and pulls out sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"I'll just take the pants," I tell him. He nods and tosses the shirt back into the drawer. "Bathroom?"

"Oh, you change in here if you want. I'll just be outside." He walks out the room and presumably waits in the hallway. I change into the pants quickly, not wanting to keep him waiting.

I open the door to let him know I'm done, but he's not in the hallway. I shrug and leave the door open a crack so he knows I'm done.

I fix the sheets on his bed by myself, luckily with no other flashbacks. When he's not back by then, I crawl into the bed and pull out my phone to send a quick text.

Me: hey, have you ever heard/read the fanfic After?

Lily: 😳😳 Who told you about it?

Me: bruh, I just watched the movie and found out it's supposed to be about Harry...

Lily: trust me, the writing is waaaaaay dirtier.

I turn red thinking about it.

Me: did u read it?

Lily: LMFAO yes. it's a classic. it was way before tho...

Me: disgusting

Laine still isn't here and my eyes are getting heavier by the minute. I set an alarm on my phone and slide it under the pillow. Then, I drift away to dreamland.

~~~

I wake up naturally, presumably before my alarm. I smile and stretch my limbs out. Then I feel something heavy sprawled across my stomach. I slowly turn to see Laine happily asleep next to me. He even has a small smile on his face.

Now, I could yell at him for coming into bed with me, or I can enjoy the moment. I choose the latter and stare at his sleeping figure.

His eyes flutter open and meet mine. I mentally cringe at the fact that I was just busted. He doesn't mind though. In fact, he just gives me a sweet smile instead of teasing me.

"I should go, I think Sonia's worried about me," I sit up and grab my phone from under the pillow. My alarm's set to ring in three minutes, so I'm not up super early.

"Wait, we have an awesome chef who could make you breakfast," he bargains, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Tempting, but it would be more impressive if it was you," I pat him on the chest and climb out of bed. I gather my stuff and debate changing in here, but I feel guilty to kick him out again.

"One day," he beams, following me out. He walks me to the door and I try not to act awkward when his fraternity brothers walk past. I'm sure they think this is the walk of shame. Laine's goofy grin doesn't help the situation either.

We stop in the foyer. "Sorry for spitting soda over your bed and probably hogging the blankets."

"Yeah, you are a blanket hog now that I think about it," he teases. "It's no biggie. Sorry for stressing you out so much about making the bed that you almost passed out."

"Ha ha," I sarcastically drawl. "Okay, I guess I'll see you later."

"Bye," he awkwardly stands. I don't know whether to kiss him or not. I go with my gut and give him a quick peck on the lips before scurrying out the door.

I don't know what we are, but it feels damn good to get some affection.

~

Boring chapter but do you see what I did with that After reference?? ;) Thought it would be funny. Anyone read it?